Chapter Text
"So, how did you like it?" Aubrey asked as they exited the movie theater.
"It wasn't all that bad. It was actually quite interesting," Beca mused, smirking at the blonde. "You know, my dad is an absolute Hitchcock-fan and Psycho is his favorite... seeing where it all came from was pretty interesting."
"Do you think he's seen it yet?" Aubrey asked and linked her arm with Beca's. The brunette smiled at the gesture, this outing had yet to feel like a date but Aubrey seemed determined that it should.
"I'm sure of it," she answered.
"Well, then you two have something to talk about next time you see each other." All the Bellas knew about Beca's complicated relationship with her father and since some of them knew him also, they couldn't quite understand it. He was a good teacher, easy to talk to if you had a problem with a text or an assignment. It shouldn't be so difficult for Beca to bond with her father, surely. But then, most of the Bellas had perfectly average relationships with their fathers, they hadn't left them, their parents were stil together. While this was also true for Aubrey's parents, she knew what it was like to have a less than ideal relationship with her father. She could sympathize.
"Yeah, well... you want to go grab something to eat?" Beca changed the subject.
"Sure, how about pizza?" Aubrey suggested, pointing at a Pizza Hut at the corner.
"I thought you weren't cheap," Beca teased.
"I think I'd rather be cheap than easy," Aubrey gave back and they laughed as they entered the pizza joint.
After they had gotten their dinner and had sat down at a table - next to instead of across from each other - they ate for a few minutes in silence. Beca threw furtive glances at the blonde and saw Aubrey smile, she had noticed. It was still a little strange to be alone with the blonde, they had never spent this kind of time together alone. Usually there was a Bella or Chloe around, or all of them. But Beca found that she enjoyed spending time with Aubrey, even though the premise of this evening, the things that might follow it, made her nervous.
Aubrey was nervous, too. She'd never been out on a date with a woman before, not in this kind of official way. Chloe and she had gone out since they had become a couple but it felt different, unsure, fragile. They were trying to figure out what they felt for each other, whether or not they could feel more... it was an actual date, and the last one of those Aubrey had had in high school. Now she felt all the insecurities of that time return, the questions one would ask - does she like me, am I making a silly face right now, should I touch her more? - the fluttery feelings all over. And with it speechlessness. It was a good thing they were busy eating.
It was still becoming a little awkward between them now. Beca sipped from her soda, Aubrey took tiny bites of the rest of her pizza.
"Can I ask you something?" Beca asked after another moment in which Aubrey thought she might panic next and say something stupid. Aubrey smiled but refrained from correcting the common mistake.
"Sure," she simply said.
"How did it happen... between you and Chloe? I mean, I... didn't even know or notice..."
"Well, you were very busy with Jesse," Aubrey said and regretted it the next moment. She knew that Beca felt bad about the things she had put the Treble, herself and everybody else through. It had made for quite a dramatic time until Beca finally broke up with Jesse. "I'm sorry... it's just. Chloe was pretty hurt. She had hoped that you guys would get together after the finals but the fact that you had built the whole routine around a song that obviously meant something to you and Jesse..."
"I know, I should have talked to you guys about it. I just... I thought it was the right thing to do. Somehow I felt that I owned Jesse... a romantic gesture. It was stupid, I thought it was what everyone expected of me." Beca made a face and Aubrey reached over to lay her hand on top of the brunette's. Beca squeezed it.
"Well, Chloe and I started talking a lot about things after... I blew up that time. We talked about you and Chloe's feelings for you. We talked about my problems with my parents... they were putting pressure on me to come back home and work for my mom's advertising company. I knew my anxiety would return full force if I did..."
"Your parents are pretty hard on you." It wasn't even a question, it was a statement. Aubrey nodded.
"It's not just them, though. It's also... and I never really admitted it before Chloe and I talked about... my sexuality...," she stopped, smiling sadly.
"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," Beca gave her an out but the blonde shook her long locks.
"It's different now," she said. "I was engaged, did you know that?" Beca shook her head. "With a guy named Brad Cummings. We started dating in high school, for two years, went to prom together, of course. Before we both went to college, he proposed, I accepted, my parents were overjoyed... but... well, we never were intimate..."
"Your anxiety thing?" Beca asked tentatively but Aubrey smiled.
"Not just that. We weren't both very eager to... go there. What my parents didn't know when they pressured me to come home after graduation, was that Brad and I had broken up. We had emailed a lot that first year, also met a couple of times half way but... well, things weren't happening for us, though we tried to... have sex. Well, before the last year Brad became withdrawn from me, it took him weeks to answer my mails not just days as was usually the case. I asked him outright if it was because I wouldn't have sex with him and he answered that he'd had sex with someone else. Just that. I was... devastated somehow. I mean... I felt betrayed and we didn't write for awhile. Then we met at Christmas and he pretended that everything was okay but I cornered him one evening and... he told me that he was in a relationship with... another man. I think he thought that I would freak but... I didn't. I mean, how could I accept Cynthia Rose or Chloe and not him, right?" Beca nodded. "He was relieved and we broke up but we didn't tell our parents, for obvious reasons. Chloe and I talked about all of that. She suggested that I might be into women, I didn't want to believe it but... once she'd said it..." Aubrey chuckled.
"The power of suggestion?" Beca grinned.
"Something like that. And of course, Chloe was just there, we had gotten so close, talking about all our problems. We started fooling around, at first I thought she was just indulging me... but things got pretty intense and then suddenly... I realized that I'd fallen in love with her. It freaked me out! But Chloe... she just told me how she felt, she held me, she made it all seem easy and I decided to stay to see where this was going. I had that job interview and they hired me, I told my parents, then they freaked out... but I stayed. And I'm happy I did," Aubrey finished.
"I'm glad you did, too," Beca said and smiled. And this time she really felt it, she felt how good it had been for Aubrey and also for Chloe to have each other, to be together. She also felt that she wanted to have a part of that... love, how she yearned to give some of her own to these remarkable women. She smiled at Aubrey.
"Have I ever apologized for being a bitch to you?" Aubrey asked and they laughed.
"Have I ever apologized for being a total brat to you?" Beca countered and they laughed more. Aubrey put her hand on Beca's cheek, just holding it there. Beca closed her eyes, feeling the soft touch of Aubrey's hand.
They were roused from their intimate silence by a group of teenagers entering. Aubrey took her hand from Beca's cheek and they sat back in their seats.
"You about finished?" Aubrey asked, looking at the remains of their dinner.
"Yeah, I'm good. Let's leave," Beca agreed and so they did.
They were walking. While the direction was toward Aubrey's home, their pace was slow. It had rained earlier but the heat was already returning but when Beca looked around them at some point and noticed there was nobody around, she slipped her fingers through Aubrey, linking them lightly. Aubrey squeezed her hand quickly then relaxed into the casual touch.
"You haven't told your parents yet, have you?" Beca asked after a few minutes.
"No, not yet. I'm not sure... when or how I will be able to. It's gonna be a shock for them," Aubrey said haltingly. Beca nodded.
"What about your parents? Do they... know about...?" Aubrey simply waved her free hand between them and Beca gave her a hafl-smile.
"I didn't even know... I mean not for sure. I knew I had feelings for Chloe but... having feelings for someone and actually doing something about them... two very different things. And now... my mom will be cool about it. She believes in the fluidity of sexuality, she's bi herself, so... my dad, I don't even know. He liked Jesse when they met that one time but I don't think he wants to think about too much about me having a sexuality at all, so..." Aubrey nodded.
"That's how dads are. My dad can talk about the mating habits of animals on end but when it comes to explaining to me or my brothers how things worked between a man and a woman - never mind any kind of alternatives he certainly wouldn't even contemplate - he left it to my mom."
"Well, I guess that's something you have in common with him," Beca said and grinned at Aubrey. The blonde laughed.
"Yeah, I guess. I'm unaccustomed to talk about sex, though Chloe is trying to change that..." Beca could see her blush even in the dim evening light. She tugged at Aubrey's hand and they stopped their leasurely walk.
"I'm not good at talking about it either, Bree. I... My mom loved talking about it but I always told her that I would talk about it only with the person I would be with... but that's kinda bull because I never talked to Jesse about it either. And we... well, we did have sex..." She didn't say any more but Aubrey could tell by Beca's demeanour that it hadn't been a pleasant experience. She stepped closer to the small brunette and put her hand to her cheek once more. She lifted Beca's face so as to look into her eyes, she seemd ashamed.
"Do you wanna talk about it?"
"I thought we had established that we didn't," Beca said and smirked half-heartedly.
"I just want you to know that you can... with me. If you want."
"It was just one more thing to tell me that Jesse and I didn't work. It was... hopelessly clumsy, awkward... depressing, really. He said it would get better but it didn't, not for me," she confessed. To her surprise, Aubrey pulled her closer and then into a hug. Her arms came automatically around the taller woman's waist and she breathed into the comfort of Aubrey's body. For a moment it was relaxing and comforting and then Beca became once again aware of Aubrey's body, her small breasts crushed against her own, her thighs, the smell of her perfume mixed with just a hint of deodorant. She nudged her face into the crook of Aubrey's neck, feeling the heat of her skin, the slight wetness of persperation which was inevitable on a night like this, in a climate like this. Aubrey's arms held her tight, her hands rubbing her back until her right one pushed beneath her hair, coming to rest at her neck. Such an intimate touch, pulling her closer to the point where Beca could see Aubrey's pulse quicken. She pressed her lips there and heard Aubrey gasp.
They disentangled and looked at each other, unsure of what had happened but knowing it... they had felt it, the pull, the want. They could still feel it and see the answer in the eyes of the other.
"I want to kiss you," Beca said. "Would that be okay?" She felt her stomach flutter, hoping that Aubrey wouldn't turn her away like Chloe had done the other night.
"It's a date, so... yeah, it's okay," Aubrey said and they stepped forward but not into another embrace, they merely leaned toward each other until their lips could meet, their bodies too shy to engage just yet. As their lips met, however, there was no question about what was happening, what they wanted. It got heated, it got full-bodied, tongues engaging, lips crushing until their lungs strated screaming for air. They parted again.
"Woah," Aubrey made and saw Beca smirk in that way she had. She laughed. "You're... a great kisser, Mitchell. Who would've thought?"
"Not me," Beca quietly confessed and pushed her hand through her hair. "You are too," she then added, grinning.
"Yeah... but I guess... maybe we should... walk again?" Beca nodded. She understood Aubrey's embarrassment, her reluctance to continue this here and now. She herself wasn't sure if they hadn't aleady gone too far. She didn't know what the rules were.
They made their way back to the apartment complex where Aubrey lived with Chloe, once again holding hands. Once they stood in the doorway of the building, they felt compelled to talk again while before they had thought about what had happened.
"Chloe said that you were only allowed upstairs if we wanted to... spend more time alone, not to see her, so..."
"I guess that's not happening, right? I mean, us... spending more time," Beca stammered. She knew they wouldn't, neither of them was ready to take it that far. If she was really honest, though, she was tempted. What had happened earlier clearly showed her that she wanted Aubrey. But there was more than want and desire, there was an underlying panic and she would have to deal with that, too. She'd never been with a woman. And this whole evening had other things attached to it, too, another person... whom she also wanted.
"Not tonight but... Beca, tonight was... great. I mean, we started a little slow but... I really liked kissing you and I...," but instead of saying it, Aubrey leaned down once again and captured Beca's lips. They took it slower this time, their bodies having cooled down during their walk here. There was still an underlying need for more but it gave way to the celebration of the moment, the feeling of the kiss, of lips touching, emotions building. They felt more in the same way that they felt less, less urgency, yet more longevity. Something was happening, and it was all between them. When they parted, they smiled at each other.
"You're amazing," Aubrey said, carressing Beca's cheek. Beca lay her own hand on top of Aubrey, guiding it to her mouth and kissing it.
"As are you," she said. They smiled, then laughed.
"I never would have thought...," Aubrey said,
"Not in a million years...," Beca confirmed but then became serious again. "But it's happening."
"Most definately." Aubrey sighed when Beca stepped once again into her private space but this time merely hugged her. It was their goodbye for tonight.
"Will you tell Chloe about this?"
"Yeah, I will. And she will want to talk. Do you want to come to lunch tomorrow?" Beca hesitated for a moment to answer. Would she be ready to talk about all her feelings tomorrow already? But as she stood and wondered she felt an eagerness to do just that, to tell Chloe how good it had felt to be with Aubrey, to get to know her. She wanted to see Chloe's face light up happily, and she wanted to hear how Aubrey felt and... she wanted this. Aubrey and Chloe and her. She wanted it to happen, and to be. She never wanted anything so much. She nodded.
"Noon?"
"Yeah," Aubrey smiled and leaned in for a short peck. "Goodnight, Becs."
"Goodnight, Bree." She smirked at the use of the nicknames Chloe usually used for them both, refraining for saying something silly. She squeezed Aubrey's hand one last time then turned and walked away. She turned to watch Aubrey enter the building then resumed her way home.