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They were laying on the floor in Dean’s room. Dean was splayed out on the wooden panels, one arm pillowed his head and the other mindlessly carding through his boyfriends hair. Cas was laying across his stomach, arms holding a book out, head slightly pushing into Dean’s fingers and ankles crossed, swaying from side to side in the air.
“Cas?” Dean asks. The room’s quiet, the only sounds playing are the rough paper-on-skin turns of Castiel’s book by that John Blue guy, the wuffing fan above them and the steady inhale and exhale of their breathing.
Cas dog-ears his book and turns to look at Dean, “Yes, Dean?”.
“Wana’ go to the fair they’re having in town?”
Cas frowns and tilts his head to the side. Dean suppresses a chuckle, his boyfriend looks like a fucking kitten. Castiel’s hair is mussed from Dean’s carding and it’s natural state, his nose is slightly bunched from the frowning and his nose is perpetually pink.
“I believe you said yesterday that it was ‘stupid’; thus the reason of you not wanting to go.” He pushed himself up from the floor with his hands and moved to rest his chin on Dean’s sternum.
“That was yesterday, this is today.”
Cas sighs and clutches at Dean’s shoulders, “I have no clothes, Dean. I'm wearing your shirt.” he says, lightly pressing kissed to Dean’s chest.
Dean shrugs, “So, wear mine. I don’t care.” He really doesn’t. In Fact, he loves seeing Cas in his clothes. It’s a reminder that Cas is his and nobody else’s, as selfish as it may sound, it’s nice to be reminded every now and then.
Castiel picked up his head from where it was resting and looks at Dean. He traces Dean’s face with them, making Dean blush under the intense inspection. “You’re being serious.”
“‘Course i’m being serious, Cas. Now get your lazy ass up so we can go.” He lightly patts Cas’ butt and waits for the smaller teen to move off of him.
Cas stretches his body as he gets up from the floor. Dean watches as his shirt rises from his small, pale frame, then drapes back down on him. “Can I borrow a different shirt, Dean?”
“What’s wrong with that one?”
Cas looks down at the shirt he’s wearing, “Dean this is your baseball shirt.”
“Exactly the point, babe.” He smiles, it’s a simple cotton baseball jersey that was issued to him after he joined the team. It was a light grey, the front read “Kansas Firebirds” in bright red letters, the back was a little more to Dean’s taste for Cas. At the bottom of the shirt it said “Shurley High” in small black letters, but that’s not what Dean loved. No, what Dean loved was that between the shoulder blades in large bold white letters it said “WINCHESTER #11”.
“You really want me to wear it out don’t you?” Cas asked, plucking the shirt with his index and thumb.
Dean took the two short steps and wrapped his arms around Cas’ waist, placing a warm kiss to the tip of Cas’ nose. “I’d fuckin’ love it.”
Castiel’s face flushed a few shades darker, he nodded his head once. “Thanks, babe.” Dean kissed his cheek then moved away to put his shoes on.
They both found their socks and shoes, slipping them on in the fan-wuffing silence of the room. Castiel easily slipped on his stupid grey TOMS, Dean remembers the trip to the mall to buy those stupid things..
“Dean, they help children in third world countries gain the chance to wear shoes that people like you and I can afford.” He huffed while staring at the TOMS rack.
“Cas, if you want to help the kids in Africa, or wherever the hell, then write a letter to Obama. Not buying fifty dollar shoes.” Dean was out of his mind bored at Zumiez, he felt like every other boyfriend here, well except for Cas. Cas always found helping Dean buy clothing fun, then again Cas was fucking weird.
“Dean, grey or black?” Dean turned to find Cas with one of each color on.
“Ya’ really want my opinion on colors of shoes?” Castiel nodded, looking back at his feet, “Go for grey, the black makes you feet look like they’re so white they’ll blind you.”
Castiel smiled, he bent down to where Dean was sitting on the stool and kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Dean.”
“What are you smiling about?” Cas questioned, tapping the toes of his shoes against the floor.
“Just remembering buying those stupid things.” He smiled, finishing the bunny-knot on his laces.
“Dean, these are not st-”
“I know Cas, kids in Africa or whatever.”
Cas arched an unimpressed brow.
Dean rolled his eyes and ignored the sassy stance Cas was sporting. “Ready to go?”
“Yes, Dean.”
They walked down the stairs hand and hand, Dean leading while Cas followed. They stopped at the front door, “Ma’, Cas and I are going out to the fair!”
“Okay, honey. Be safe and have fun, but be back before ten. It is a school night.” She yelled back from the kitchen.
“‘Kay, love ya!” He yelled back. Yelling seemed to be a normal Winchester way of communication.
----
The ride to the fair was fairly short. There was a few red lights here and there, but other than that it was small town roads, open windows, blaring music and ruffled hair. The parking grounds at the fair was a slightly browning patch of grass; he pulled his ‘67 Impala through slowly. Afraid that if he went a few miles over speed limit a rock would wind up getting stuck in a tire or scratching the paint-job.
Dean found a spot he was happy with. It was rather secluded, the grass was actually green and there seemed to be no rocks. The only downside was that it was a good five minutes from the fair.
He and Cas got out of his car, both groaning and stretching in the sun like over grown cats. Dean walked behind the car and over to Cas’ side, taking one of his still stretching hands, slightly making him jump. Dean squeezed his hand in a ‘i’m sorry’ and receiving and ‘it’s fine’ squeeze back.
They walked the distance to the fair in silence. Enjoying the warmth of one another's hand, the warm sun on their skin, while cool winds blew making their noses cold. The sound of people chatting grew louder as the sound of their shoes crunching against the gravel got faded out.
Against Cas’ protests, Dean paid for their entrance and to get them tickets for food and games.
“I could have paid, Dean.”
“Then what’s the point of me being your boyfriend?” Dean joked back, the joke obviously not reaching Cas.
“I’m not with you for financial reasons, Dean. I’m with you because I love you.”
“I know, Cas. Wait, what?” Cas loved him? When did this happen? They had been best friends since third grade and all the way into high school. Things had gotten awkward when in August junior year Dean realized his emotions toward his best friend weren’t purely platonic. When Cas had questioned him asking why he was avoiding him, Dean was upfront about it. The feelings ended up being returned, thus leading them to a relationship that’s lasted a year and two months.
“You did not know I loved you Dean? I believed that to be obvious.”
Dean shook his head. Cas couldn’t love him. It was impossible, or near impossible. He was jealous, slightly possessive, he relied on brute force, and he was usually emotionally constipated. Not what Cas wanted, loved or needed.
Dean felt the warmth of Cas’ hand on his cheek, he let himself involuntarily lean in to the soft palm. “Dean, look at me.”
Dean slightly opened his eyes to look at the shorter teen. “Dean, I am not lying when I say that I love you. I do, really do. I love the freckles that you have, It’s like god flicked paint onto your skin and forgot to cover it. I love how your green eyes brighten when you’re happy and seem matte when you’re sad. I love how much you care for other people. I love the way you remember little things that don’t matter, like with my shoes this morning. I love how you have something either set in stone or change your mind on a whim. I love everything about you, Dean Winchester. From your imperfections to your perfections.”
“Cas..”
“Shh, Dean. I don’t need to hear it back. I just need you to believe me. Can you do that?”
Dean nodded, squeezing the hand he was still holding.
“Can I kiss you, Dean?”
“Cas, you can always kiss me.”
Cas leaned up on his toes, pressing a soft, chaste to Deans lips. Not caring what other people thought, not caring that Dean might not believe that he was loved. Not caring that they were probably the town spectacle right now. Not caring that even if he and Dean weren’t sharing a kiss everyone would know that he’s Deans because the back of his shirt says “WINCHESTER #11” on it.
That’s what Dean made him do, not care. It was like Dean was another force that made him do things he never thought about doing before. It was always Dean to egg him on to do certain things. When he was apprehensive about joining the track team, Dean took him out to the track and ran miles with him. When he wasn’t going to do NaNoWriMo, Dean brought a box of notebooks, highlighters and pens to his house and told him that he should go for it. When he was wasn’t going to do anything that Dean knew he wanted to do, Dean would be there with his arms open and giving Cas all the pushes he needs.
Castiel smiled as he went back to normal ground, lips not on Dean’s, but still hand and hand.
“C’mon, let’s go win you something.”
----
They walked around the fair a few times, finally stopping at a booth. It was a cheesy, cliche booth. There was a small pyramid of baseballs on the table and on a self to the back were bottles.
“Hit all the bottles and you get a prize!” The man yelled, had waving to present the shelf of bottles.
“I got this, babe.” Dean said with a crooked smile.
He stridded to the booth, arm ready to hit the bottles and win Cas that stupidly huge pink pig from the top shelf.
“You gonna’ play the game, son?” The vendor asked, raising a judging eyebrow at Dean.
“Hell yes!” He handed the man the five tickets to play the game, grabbed the balls as got to throwing.
He hit all the glass bottles right on spot. Each bottle shattered into small shards of glass, collecting on the mat that the bottles were supposed to rest on and not break. With each swing of his arm he chuckled. He definitely won that pig for Cas.
“How in the hell did you break those?” The man gawked.
“I have a pitching average of 80 miles per hour, sir.” Dean shrugged nonchalantly.
“That’s amazing, man. Props!” The man took his baseball cap off and looked at the mess on the floor.
“So what’s the prize for the lucky lady?”
“The prize for the lucky man will be the very fat pig from the top shelf.”
The man stared up and down at Dean, estonished that he could be homosexual in any sense. He stepped up on a small stool and grabbed the pig Dean wanted for Cas. He handed the pig to Dean with a polite nod.
Dean walked back to Cas with the oversized pig in his arms. “Look what I won for you, babe!”
Cas took the pig, blushing slightly at the fact that Dean used his baseball skills to win brownie points with Cas. Not like he needed them.
“Thank you, Dean. I will cherish this forever.” He hugged the pig between crossed arms, pushing his cheek into it’s head.
“I believe i’ll name him Apple.”
“Apple?”
“Yes, because you love apple pie and you won me this pig. It’s very logical.”
Dean laughed, his chest heaving in and out, while fat teardrops fell from his eyes. “You’re such a dork, Cas.”
“I know.”
Dean wrapped his arm around Cas’ shoulder and started walking them toward the food stands.
“Let’s go get food, i’m hungry.”
“You’re always hungry. It’s like you have multiple stomachs.” Dean always ate. He’d constantly steal food from Cas whenever he got the chance, he had a stash of cookies and water in his impala so that he could eat on the road, he probably had an emergency stash in his room too.
They walked into the center of the food stands, all the scents mixing together creating a painting of smells.
“Wait here, I know what to get us!”
Cas moved to sit at an empty table, watching as Dean ran off to who knows what stand. Castiel sighed, he burrowed his head into Apple’s face. Smelling the new fibers of the fabric. He hoped that Dean knew he loved him, but he wasn’t going to push him or bring it up. He was going to let it happen naturally. Let Dean find the truth in his words.
Castiel felt a shift in the bench beside him. He looked up from Apple and saw Dean sitting next to him with the brightest smile he could possibly have.
“What did you purchase?” Cas asked, trying to look at the contents in the brown paper bag.
“Close your eyes.”
Castiel turned himself to Dean and closed his eyes, “This is gonna’ be a little bit hot, okay?”
Castiel nodded. He heard the rustling of the paper bag and a snap of the opening of a plastic container. He waited for Dean to finish preparing what ever he was going to give him, he felt a little ridiculous at the fact that he has his eyes closed and is waiting for Dean to spoon feed him.
“Open up,” Castiel could hear the smile in Dean tone of voice, it was a bit smug and playful. Castiel obliged, he parted his lips waiting for the warm plastic of the spoon to touch them.
He felt the spoon on his mouth, immediately he proceeded to wrap his lips around the spoon and use his tongue to slide the contents off. He tasted the flavors explode in his mouth, they were warm and heavy. He could taste the thick, syrupy cinnamon, sour, crunchy apples and subtle flakey crust. He smiled at the food in his mouth, eyes still closed and lips still glistening with the fillings residue. He move his tongue out to capture the rest of the filling from his lips, slowly working his way around them, careful not to miss anything.
“Apple pie.” He said triumphantly. He opened his eyes to see a blushing, jaw slack Dean Winchester.
“Dean, are you okay?” Castiel placed his hand on Dean’s knee and leaned forward to peer closely at his face.
“Uh, yeah, Cas. Sorry.” His face flushed a couple shades darker and he ran a stressed hand through his hair.
“Are you sure?”
“Yep.”
“If you say so..” Castiel muttered, taking the plastic spoon from Dean’s hand. He dug into the pie tin, taking a spoon full of pie and sticking it into his mouth. He handed the spoon back to Dean and peered into the brown bag again. In the bag he found a large styrofoam cup with a lid and straw.
"It's lemonade," Dean said between the spoon and pie. "I remembered you really liked it that time I tried to make us lunch, so I bought some. Hope it's just as good." Dean swallowed his food, looking back at Cas who looked at him like the sun flew out of his ass.
"What?" Dean whipped around his mouth, no crumbs.
"Nothing." Cas quickly replied, pulling the cup out of the bag and bringing the straw to his lips. The thin juice flowed into his mouth, it was cold enough to be comfortable and not abrasive, there were small bits of pulp he could chew on and it was just the right amount of sweet.
"Ya' like it?" Dean asked, staring at Cas while he sucked the life out of the straw.
"Very much, thank you Dean." Castiel leaned over and gave Dean a peck on the cheek. Making him blush and look down at his lap.
“No problem, Cas.”
They finished eating the pie and drinking the lemonade. It was silent for most of the time they ate. A comfortable silence. A silence with their thighs touching, shoulders occasionally brushing, spoon and straw sharing and involuntary leaning.
They got up to walk around the fair. Hand and hand, arms fully touching and Cas hugging Apple like he was going to vanish soon.
The fair was winding down, people at booths lazily chatting with each other, kids slowly running around, the band starting to sing mellow songs that people could sway to, and rides shutting down, having their final call.
Dean pulled Cas to the ferriswheel, there was a short wait to get to the front and Dean and enough tickets for he and Cas to ride. Cas looked up at him with a questioning frown, he knew as well as Dean that Dean fucking hated heights. Especially heights in rickety town-fair rides. But Dean wanted to do this. He wanted the cheesy stop at the top of the ferris wheel to see the milky night sky and have that movie like moment. He wanted to face his fear with Cas, his fear of heights, of rejection, of loss and of opening up. He could do this, he would do this.
Dean ignored the look and handed the man the tickets for them both, along with Apple whom could not fit. They stepped into the booth. It was open to the night sky, seated two people and the only thing that kept them from plummeting to their fall was a thick metal bar and the surface they placed their feet on. The man pulled the bar over them, “effectively” strapping them to “safety”.
Dean felt his stomach jolt with the rise up, he pulled his arm around Cas’ shoulder pulling him to his side. Cas looked up at him, his blue eyes wide with worry.
“Dean, are you okay? You’re breathing is quickly increasing.”
“‘m fine, Cas. No worries.” He choked out, trying to ignore the fact that they were slowly rising to the top and pay attention to what he wanted to say.
“Cas, I need to tell you something.”
“What is it?” He mumbled into Dean shirt.
“I love you.”
Cas’ head shot up from where it was resting on Dean's shoulder. His eyes were wide and jaw was slack.
“Don’t need to look so- holyfuckingshit.” Dean gasped. They stopped. Why were they stopping? Why were they stopping at the top? Did it mess up, holy fuck. Dean felt himself heaving at the feeling of them stopping, his forehead was coated in a sheen of sweat and his hands were slightly trembling.
“Dean, it’s okay. It always stops at the top. It’s to let everyone see the sky.” Cas whispered into Dean’s ear. His thumb rubbing small circles into Dean’s cheek.
He heard Dean’s breath raggedly try to steady itself. His eyes were still closed and he was still shaking slightly.
So, naturally, Cas did what he knew best distracted Dean.
He kissed him.
Cas cradled Dean’s face in his hand, the soothing circles stopping. He pushed his lips against Deans and swiped a tongue along the seam of Dean’s lips, waiting for Dean to get with the picture. He heard Dean groan at his tongue and allow access by parting his lips. Dean didn’t put up a fight for dominance, Cas knew it was because of the mild panic attack he’s facing. Cas ran his tongue along Dean’s teeth, moving to swipe cross hatches along the roof of Dean’s mouth and then lick and circle around Dean’s tongue. He tasted his now lover, the sweet from the pie, the tang of the lemonade and the flavor of Dean.
Castiel felt the ride start to move, he slowly exited from Dean’s mouth. Licking the outside of Dean’s lips then placing shy kisses to the corner of his mouth.
“Shit, Cas. I should freak out more often.” Dean sighed, his lips bruised and cheeks flushed.
Cas retaliated with a smack to Dean’s shoulder, “Dean, no. Also, did you just bring me up here to tell me you love me?”
“Yeah..” Dean answered shyly.
“You could have told me wherever, not in a situation that’s prone to give you a panic attack!”
“I just wanted it to be special.”
“Dean, it would have been special anywhere. You could have told me with food in your mouth or when you call me while playing Call of Duty. It will always be special.”
“You mean that?”
Castiel nodded, closing his eyes and leaning back on Dean’s side.
“I love you, Dean. Doesn't matter how you say it or when, I always will.”
“Just don’t say ‘Forever and always’.”
“Why not?” Cas looked up at Dean, wondering why such a beautiful statement was not to be said.
“Because that’s a really angry Taylor Swift song.”
Castiel stage gasped,“You, Alpha male, Dean Winchester, listens to Taylor swift?!” he cover his mouth and bugged out his eyes.
“You’re such a dork, babe.” Dean said through a short chuckle.
“But you love me.”
“That I do, Cas. That I do.”