Chapter Text
Hanahaki disease: an illness born of one-sided love that causes flowers to grow within the infected patient’s lungs. If left untreated it will suffocate the host and kill them. The growth can be removed through surgery, but it will also remove the feelings along with the flowers. It can be cured without side effects if the feelings are returned.
The first time Law spit up flower petals it was in Dressrosa. Luffy was carrying him over his shoulder and refused to put him down. At first Law thought it was just the up and down movement that was making him feel sick- well, that and the fear he was going to fail- but after a few minutes he realized the thing trying to crawl up his throat wasn’t bile.
Luffy landed a jump that shook Law hard enough to startle a cough out of him. When he saw the red petals floating away in their wake he mistook them for blood at first. Then he realized they were falling far too slowly, and his veins turned to ice.
He was a doctor- of course he knew what Hanahaki disease was. He’d even had first hand experience with it. It was not something he had ever wanted to go through again.
He had...suspicions about who the flowers were for, but he refused to acknowledge it. He was hoping that this time he’d be able to bury the feelings until they disappeared.
He was never that lucky.
It wasn’t until after Doflamingo was defeated that he coughed up a whole flower.
The Straw Hats were celebrating their victory now that everyone was healed enough for it, which of course meant that they had roped Law into it as well. Something about not being a party pooper.
He actually enjoyed himself for a while. It wasn’t noticeable to the vast majority of people there, but he allowed himself to relax a bit. He had a few drinks, ate some of their cook’s delicious non-bread oriented food, and listened to them crack jokes and bicker affectionately. At one point he had almost laughed at the sight of their captain attempting to sing and dance when he was bloated to twice his normal size with meat. Almost.
He felt the tickle in the back of his throat that signaled the approach of something unwanted and quietly slipped away in all the ruckus. Nobody seemed to notice except for their shrewd eyed archeologist, but thankfully she didn’t point it out to anyone.
He found a secluded spot in the trees and finally let himself release the cough that had been building up in his chest for a while. After some painful convulsing he hacked up a red blossom into his palms. A gerbera daisy.
He wanted to curse himself for his thorough knowledge of plants and their symbolism. It had been years, yet he still remembered all those flowers he had researched when he was younger. Back then he’d been desperate to know what the petals he’d been vomiting had come from. Even after he found out he kept reading. Just in case something like that ever happened again.
Well, now it was happening again, and Law wished he had died back under Doflamingo’s gun more than ever.
The flowers a person expelled with Hanahaki directly corresponded to how they saw the person they were in love with. Nobody knew why that was exactly, but it made it a lot harder to deny to one’s self who their object of attraction was. Law would give anything to not know who he was having these ridiculous feelings for.
But of course he did because the universe hated him.
Gerbera daisies meant cheerfulness. They were as red as Straw Hat-ya’s stupid vest, and Law hated them.
He wanted to crush his feelings in his fist as easily as he could the flower that was there instead.
He could remove them- all too easily with his abilities- but he didn’t want to. He’d vowed never to do that to himself again after last time. No, he’d rather die than repeat that.
But he was being ridiculous. He didn’t have to die if the stupid feelings would just go away. This time was different. He could wait it out. Surely the growth in his lungs would recede if he just stopped falling in love with that smiling idiot. He would be fine. He could do it.
He dropped the crumpled blossom from his hands and shoved them under a bush with his foot.
Out of sight, out of mind.
It was far easier said than done.
He did his utmost best to avoid the other captain when they didn’t have business to discuss, but the other would just. Not. Leave. Him. Alone. Ever .
Not even when his rowdy crew scolded him for clinging to Law like a rubbery koala. The Heart Pirate’s Captain had to sit through all of Nami’s verbal- and physical- rebukes to her captain, Chopper’s timid reprimanding for fear of Luffy accidentally reopening some of Law’s wounds, and general chiding from the rest of the crew for weeks, but it was all for naught. Luffy was intent on sticking to Law like an extremely cheerful parasite.
It should have bothered Law. Well, actually it did, since Law was not one much for physical affection, which he’d told Luffy many times. But he didn’t mind it as much as he would have if it were anyone else. And that was the real problem.
How the hell was he supposed to get over his horribly unwanted feelings if he was stuck with the other all the time? His plan had always been to isolate himself from the other with the hopes that his feelings would fade with their time apart, but that was clearly no longer an option.
Another problem that had sprouted, quite literally, was that their close quarters made it harder for Law to hide his affliction from the other. He didn’t know if Luffy even knew what Hanahaki was, but he was willing to bet that if he knew Law was dying he’d throw a fit. A very loud, attention getting fit that would wipe all Law’s privacy away.
So he did his best to peel the other off him and find someplace to discreetly throw up flower petals before the idiot caught him again. It got harder and harder as time passed, since it was becoming more and more frequent.
And it wasn’t just keeping it from Luffy that was hard. It was keeping it secret from everyone. On more than one occasion he’d had to hastily shove the flowers in his hands into his pockets when someone came around a corner unexpectedly.
He had a sneaking suspicion that some of them had figured it out anyway, but none of them brought it up. Nico Robin almost certainly knew, judging by the looks she kept tossing his way and the occasional times when her timing for distracting someone else from Law was a little too perfect. She at least, had respect for his privacy, so Law didn’t try to bring it up with her. He figured that as long as she didn’t tell anyone else it wouldn’t matter. He could continue to swallow down his feelings and pretend they weren’t trying to kill him.
He was a fucking idiot.
He was sitting in the medical bay, feet propped up on a table as he balanced precariously on the hind legs of a wooden chair, doing some light reading when she found him.
“So, when are you going to tell him how you feel, Torao?” Robin asked, creeping up behind him to look over his shoulder at the medical journal he held. He resisted the urge to sigh, leaning forward to rest all four of the chair’s legs on the ground again.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Robin-ya.”
She gave him an unimpressed look as she gazed down at him. “Torao.”
“It’s Trafalgar,” he said, frowning. “And it’s none of your concern. It’ll go away soon enough.” He turned back to his book.
“Is that what you tell yourself every time you cough up another handful of flower petals?” she asked pointedly. And damn her for guessing correctly.
He didn’t answer, choosing to glare at the text in front of him instead.
He heard a light sigh before a hand came to rest on his shoulder. “You should tell him. He’d want to know.” He waited until he couldn’t hear her footsteps anymore before dropping the book and putting his head in his hands. Damn her again for telling Law what he already knew.
He spit out a soft yellow petal and tossed it in the trash.
“Tooorrraaaaoooo!” the excited voice screamed before he found himself with an armful of Luffy.
He fought to stay upright under the unexpected weight and stumbled into the railing. “Straw Hat-ya, what have I told you about jumping on me?” he grumbled.
“Shishishi! Not to do it!” the other laughed. “But I can’t help it! I see Torao and I just want to jump him!”
Law felt his face heat up and he sputtered for a few seconds. There was no way Luffy meant it in anything but an innocent way, but for fuck’s sake he could not say shit like that .
“Luffy, do you even know how you sound?” Zoro snorted from his spot a few feet away where he’d been napping until his loud captain had woken him. Law glanced at the green haired swordsman and silently gave a prayer of thanks that he didn’t have to be the one to point it out to Luffy.
“What do you mean? I sound like me!” Luffy protested, arms and legs squeezing a little tighter around Law.
The rest of the crew shook their heads at their captain’s naivete. They were all gathered above deck for lunch since it was such a nice day.
Their shipwright stood up and struck a pose, booming out, “You sound suuuUUPER PERVY!” Judging by the wide smile on his face and the thumbs up he gave his captain, he didn’t see it as a bad thing.
Nami slapped him upside the head. “Sit down, moron. He’s right though, Luffy. Don’t say stuff like that- it makes you sound like you want to sleep with Torao.” She crossed her arms and sat back down.
“What? But I do wanna sleep with Torao. Sleeping is great. That’s why Zoro does it so much,” Luffy said, unwinding one arm from around Law’s chest to point at his friend.
There was a collective groan all around.
“We’re talking about a different kind of sleeping, Luffy,” Robin explained gently.
“A different kind? There’s more than one?” Luffy asked, tilting his head and furrowing his brow in confusion. Law would have buried his face in his hands, but they were unfortunately still trapped under Luffy’s arm.
“Yohohoho- we’re talking about sex!” Brook blurted out before Nami could forcibly shut his mouth. Law wished someone would throw him overboard and end his misery.
Luffy just looked disappointed that they weren’t talking about some secret new sleeping method he could use. “Oh. Well, that’s fine too I guess,” he said, making everyone else lose their damn minds.
Some of them were arguing with him about how he shouldn’t be making such declarations so nonchalantly and others were covering their ears and trying to drown out what they were hearing.
“Oh gods, please don’t talk about sex, Luffy! I can’t handle hearing it from you, I really can’t!” Usopp cried. “You’re not supposed to know what sex is!”
Luffy made a petulant face at that. “I know what sex is! I didn’t grow up under a rock!” Law was starting to feel ill. He needed to lie down and forget this ever happened.
“Straw Hat-ya,” he said quietly, trying to get the other’s attention.
“Okay, fine! But you’re only supposed to talk about having sex with someone if you really like them! Otherwise I’ll never be able to look at you the same way again! Just let me pretend you’re an innocent kid!” Usopp countered. The poor guy was practically in hysterics.
“I’m nineteen!” Luffy protested, and the bickering continued.
“Straw Hat-ya,” he tried again. His stomach was starting to churn.
Luffy didn’t hear him.
The Straw Hat Pirates kept arguing back and forth, but Law wasn’t really paying attention anymore. It was taking too much effort just to stay calm.
“Well, it doesn’t matter anyway!” Luffy burst out. “Besides, I like Torao plenty!”
Nami glowered at him. “It’s not the same, dummy! And if you like him so much, then tell us why!” She probably didn’t mean for it to come out so harsh. She probably just meant to have Luffy evaluate his actual feelings, but it made Law feel even worse.
After all, what would Luffy see in someone like Law? They were like night and day.
Luffy was all smiles and joy and brought light into everyone’s lives. Law was the opposite. He was moody and difficult to be around and ruined everything he ever touched. He couldn’t even avenge Cora on his own. Hell, he hadn’t even succeeded in dying back on Dressrosa like he planned.
“What’s not to like about Torao?”
Law’s heart stuttered at the words, and his breathing grew laboured for a different reason than panic.
“Torao’s great! He has his cool powers and he can use a sword! Plus he’s all smart and stuff, and he saved my life! Also, he’s comfy, smells nice, and is fun to be around!” That last one sounded like a fucking lie to Law, but he couldn’t open his mouth to protest, No, he had to keep his mouth firmly shut to keep from spewing flower petals everywhere.
Luffy’s crew had the decency to not try and argue about Law not being likeable when he was standing among them, but they were looking rather incredulously at the pair.
Luffy turned from them to look Law in the eye. “Shishishi- you’re a pretty great guy, Torao!” The smile he gave him was so blinding that Law wanted to turn his head away. He didn’t deserve that smile or the way that it made him feel warm all over.
He wanted to cry.
He didn’t of course, because that would be humiliating to break down in tears just because someone was being unreasonably nice to him. But he wanted to. He wanted to cry and collapse in the other’s embrace and apologize for not being good enough. He wanted the flowers blossoming in his chest to disappear and let him breathe unhindered again.
But he didn’t cry, and the flowers didn’t disappear. He could hear them rattle inside his chest with every breath he took.
Lucky for him, everyone’s attention snapped to the cook when he appeared with food. Extra lucky for him that meant Luffy finally let go and zoomed away to grab as much meat as the cook allowed.
When he ran off to the restroom nobody noticed except Robin.
He didn’t return to eat with them. He was too busy trying not to choke on the amaryllis that wouldn’t stop pouring from his mouth. After an hour had passed he couldn’t tell whether the red was just the natural color of the blossoms or if it was because of the blood that came with it.