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Summary:

Days after the mission to save the Chee from being discovered, and having to swim deep in the ocean, Tobias talks to Rachel about why he was so uncomfortable.

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Tobias woke up screaming in thought speak. Again. He was an animorph, nightmares and trauma came with a secret war against evil aliens. His wasn't about his father being murdered while he watched, David, or any of the other million things that woke up the rest of the animorphs. Not lately anyway. No, his nightmare (the same one for the last three days) was from before. When he was a lonely kid being messed up by an aunt and uncle on opposite coasts rather than being messed up by alien parasites. It was all brought on by that stupid water. Water sucked.

He didn't care that he couldn't swim, not anymore. It used to bother him, especially when it was used as bullying fodder when his bullies eventually found out, but he was a hawk now and they didn't really swim. Water still sucked. Diving as a whale, thousands of pounds and as a long as a house but still utterly surrounded by it, almost consumed. Getting his head shoved in a toilet for the millionth time by a bully, trying to hold his breath but maybe kind of wondering what would happen if he stopped trying. Having his aunt shove his head in the sink because the dishes weren't clean and having to make sure he closed his eyes so the dish soap didn't get in his eyes. Or his uncle holding him under the tub, again and again with hardly any time to breathe. Tobias didn't want to remember why.

Puking was not the first thing he wanted to do in the morning. But here he was, puking. Gross. He had to shake his head to get it all out of his beak. The fact that it was the first time he had puked as a bird wasn't really something to celebrate.

Ax came bursting into his meadow at full gallop, tail blade poised to kill. <Tobias!> He called, maybe the most concerned he had heard the andalite in a while. Tobias might have been tempted to call it rage if he had been focused properly. But he hadn't even heard Ax running so he wasn't very focused on the present. The andalite came to a halt near his perch. <You do not seem to be in danger. That is good. A relief.>  He lowered his deadly blade and stepped a little closer, avoiding the vomit. <Why were you screaming? I would like to help.> Tobias could tell he was frowning. Which was impressive since andalites don't have mouths and had to frown with their eyes.

Tobias didn't answer right away. In fact, he counted out two minutes before he did. It was supposed to calm people down but it wasn't working. That's what he got for reading some pop psychology book over someone's shoulder. <It's hard to explain, Ax.>

<Would it be easier in a group meeting?>

<Slick. It was just a nightmare.>

<This is worrying. You have mentioned bad dreams the last two days. Were they from your experience diving as a whale and squid?>

<Yea.> Tobias said, not having the energy to lie but especially not to give the full truth.

<Would you like to go flying?> Ax prompted. Tobias enjoyed flying and the andalite wasn't sure how else to help.

<Not right now, Ax.>

<Would you like to rest on my shoulder as I eat?>

<Maybe later, Ax-man.>

<I am unfamiliar with how to help someone with nightmares. Is there something humans normally do? Perhaps we could->

<AX!>

They both fell quiet. A minute passed in total silence.

<Sorry. Sorry. I'm not a morning person and I haven't exactly been sleeping well. I know you want to help and I appreciate it. It's fine though. I'm fine.> Tobias lied. He knew he'd be shaking if he was human. Maybe even fear sweating.

<I just...I need to breathe. I think I'm gonna go flying for a bit. You eat breakfast, maybe go back to bed or something. It's still early, even for you.> Tobias said.

Rachel's house was a welcome sight. Rachel being in her bed was even better. Tobias wasn't sure if she would be at school or not, it was hard to keep track of days by himself and he hadn't asked Ax. Although given the time, she should've probably been in bed either way.

TAP. TAP. TAPTAP. TAP. TAPTAP.

He stopped hitting the window with his beak when Rachel stirred. <Rachel.> He didn't want to worry her the second she woke up and his misery would've been obvious if he said much more.

"Tobias?" Rachel sat up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes and looking at her window. She threw her covers off and walked over to the window, opening it and stepping aside so Tobias could flap to her dresser. "What's up?"

<Give me a second.> He landed on her floor and began to morph to his human self. The first change was his height- he went from being about 25 inches long and three pounds to about 65 inches tall and almost a hundred. Still mostly bird although his talons began splitting into toes. Then his organs melted and rearranged while his bones shifted and changed. It didn't hurt but it was always bizarre. His beak melted into his still feathered face while teeth shot into his mouth. Wings became arms and feathers melted into flesh. A couple seconds later, he was human.

Tobias pulled her into a hug like his life depended on it. His sanity certainly did. "Sorry for waking you." He said into her shoulder.

"It's alright. What's wrong? Nightmares?" Rachel asked, tentatively hugging him back. This was weird behavior from Tobias.

"Yea."

"It'll be ok. I'm here. Let's go sit on my bed." Rachel led him back to her bed and draped her blankets over him. After she locked her door for good measure so they wouldn't be disturbed, she cuddled up next to him. According to her alarm clock, she still had two hours until she had to wake up. That would have bothered her if he wasn't so upset.

"Do you wanna talk about them?" She asked, quietly. Solem even.

"I think so. It's not about the war. Well, not exactly. The last mission brought them on but my nightmare has been about...before." He felt nauseous even thinking about it but the iron grip that they had on each other's hands helped some.

"Oh?" Rachel asked. Then it dawned on her. "Oh. You didn't deserve what happened to you. Your aunt and uncle are awful people and I hate them almost as much as I do the Yeerks. Maybe even more, honestly." She led his head to her lap and began to play with his hair.

"It's so hard to think about, Rachel. I woke up puking. I didn't even know hawks could do that." Tobias shuddered

"Do you want some water?" Rachel asked.

Tobias looked stricken. "No. Later, maybe. When the nightmare isn't so fresh. I have, a, uh, bad relationship with water. Drinking it usually isn't a problem but after the last couple nights...it can wait. Sorry."

"I'm the one who's sorry, Tobias. I wasn't thinking." Rachel brought his palm to her lips and kissed it.

"It's not even water that's the problem. Not really. It's that you can't breathe under it. Your lungs ache, they burn, from trying to hold your breath for so long or else it fails and water rushes in until you get yanked out by your hair, choking and gasping for air for two seconds before getting shoved back under. Five if I was lucky. Even when it's finally over, it still goes on. Your clothes and hair are soaked, your eyes and lungs ache forever, if they're feeling especially evil you could get slapped around. Before and after getting your head held under the water. God, I was practically blessed if it only happened once a week." Tobias spoke, voice barely wavering as he recounted the horrors he endured. It was when he was finished and he looked up to see Rachel silently crying that he broke down.

"It hurts. It hurts so much, Rachel." Tobias whimpered as the tears came. They spilled down his face in messy tracks and mixed with snot, soaking into her shirt. His too skinny body shook as he cried. He couldn't help remembering his uncle dragging him into the bathroom to dunk his head, over and over again, into the bathtub and it only made his sobbing worse. He hung onto Rachel for dear life, blubbering loudly even as his face grew red and hot and his vision narrowed only to Rachel's shirt and his pain. Tobias wiped his eyes and tried to say sorry but he couldn't speak and yet still more tears burned his face.

He woke up what felt like ten years later to someone shaking him. How'd someone get in his tree?

"Tobias. Wake up, Tobias. You need to morph back. Tobias. Come on. Tobias." Rachel called. She sounded far away.

"Ow!" She pinched him.

"Morph back, come on. Three minutes left."

"Oh!" That brought everything in sharp focus. Tobias started demorphing instantly. Even though morphing took a lot of energy and he was still exhausted, he morphed back to human after less than ten seconds as a hawk. "Sorry, I know that was gross. And the crying. Sorry about your shirt."

"It's fine." Rachel said, holding his hand again.

"Rachel?" Naomi called, knocking on her door. "Is your door locked? You better get up. You have to get ready for school. I can get your sisters ready but I could use your help. I'm working from home today but it can't really wait."

"Yea!" Rachel called.

"Sorry, I didn't know what day it was." Tobias said after Rachel's mom walked away. "I should get going."

"You don't have to. You can stay here today if you want. I guess my mom will be here but if you stay in my room you should be fine. You can keep the door locked, she shouldn't need anything. You can keep the window open if you need to eat or anything. I've got a candy bar in my end table you're welcome to. And feel free to use my alarm clock to time your morphs." Rachel said before she gathered some clothes from her dresser and went to her bathroom to change. After she came back she checked her backpack and, making sure she had everything, she sat back down. Tobias leaned into her. "I've also got some books for you. Some history books and some free paperbacks from the library in my bookshelf and...this." Rachel got up to reach under her bed and pulled out a small bag.

"So, I know I never got you a present for you birthday besides the cake and I wasn't really sure when to give this to you so now seems like a good time. I hope it helps you feel better." Rachel said, nervous for a reason she couldn't guess at. Tobias accepted the present carefully.

"Thank you, Rachel." Tobias said. Rachel could tell he wanted to say something else.

"Tobias, if you tell me you've never gotten a present before I swear to god I will hunt your aunt and uncle down." They both knew she wasn't kidding.

"I have. Just, it's been awhile." Tobias said, reaching into the bag to pull out a couple of books. He flipped the first one over to read the title. "Dinosaurs. Sweet." He remembered to smile and hugged her again. The book he was looking at was actually a book of dinosaur illustrations titled Charles R. Knight: The Artist Who Saw Through Time. Tobias didn't even have to check to realize that the second book was almost a thousand pages, it was a textbook called The Dinosauria. It would keep him occupied for at least a week.

"I'm glad you like it. I've got to go help my mom now. If you get uncomfortable in morphing clothes, there are some clothes you can wear in my bottom drawer. Just, you know, take them off before you morph. I-I hope you feel better." Rachel said, hugging him a final time. She grabbed her bag and headed downstairs. She didn't lock the door.

–––

As she walked into her kitchen, Rachel realized she had just assumed Tobias would keep morphing back to human while he lounged around. If he actually stayed. It didn't really bother her exactly, assuming he would be human most of the day, but she hoped he would. It be easier to read at the very least. Not to mention that he deserved to be able to be sad and angry and upset and those were things he could only be as a human.

"Did you not sleep well, Rachel?" Jordan asked, passing her on her way to the kitchen.

"Eh. Woke up a bit early." She said. It was good not to have to lie to her family even though it had become easy.

"Oh." Jordan replied.

"Why, what's up?" Rachel asked. She could tell Jordan wanted to say something else.

"Just, I thought I heard crying last night. I didn't know if it was you or not. I know you have nightmares sometime." She admitted.

"I wasn't crying, I slept ok actually. Thanks for worrying though, kid.

Jordan scowled. "I'm not a kid."

"Whatever you say, kid." Rachel said with a smirk.

"Mom! Rachel keeps calling me a kid." Jordan called to their mom.

"You're ten, Jordan. Enjoy being a kid while you can." Naomi said, busy pouring cereal for everyone and getting Sarah's shoes on.

Jordan pouted but ate her cereal in silence. Naomi shared a smile with her oldest daughter.

"Thanks, Mom." Rachel said, both for the cereal and the fact that she hadn't tried making them breakfast. Cereal was safe.

"Of course, dear. Can you make sure Jordan and Sarah get on their bus for me? I really have to get started on work."

"Sure, Mom." She was used to it even though it was usually annoying. Come to think of it though, it described being a big sister in general.

It was a good thing their bus came ten minutes before her own otherwise her mom would've been even more frazzled. After they got on, it gave her time to think about Tobias. All he had been through and the things he hadn't shared that were surely worse. God, his aunt and uncle better hope they stayed out of her sight, she swore she would hurt them. The Yeerks thought they had it tough- just wait until she got her claws on them. Why bother being Rachel-the-girl who they would never take seriously when she could be Rachel-the-grizzly or Rachel-the-elephant and show them what it was like to hurt someone smaller than them. Disgusting, evil, people. Finally, her bus came and she was forced to stop thinking about how much she would make them pay, if only because it would be a bad idea to get into a fight with the first person who ticked her off. School was going to be lame.

––––––

Rachel's room was nice. Not only because it looked nice, of course it did since Rachel lived in it, but because it was like being surrounded by her all day. Her style, her interests outside the war, her scent. Tobias had no idea if it was perfume or whatever but he really, really, liked it. Her bed was too soft for him but it smelled like her so he stayed on it while he read. Even though he knew he should go hunt, Tobias wasn't feeling hungry enough to do so. Or at all. But he did help himself to the candy bar anyway. And boy did chocolate taste just as good as he remembered. But for the most part he didn't feel like getting up. Besides, he had books to read.

He didn't miss books per se, since he read frequently as a hawk, but being able to turn the page when he wanted to was very nice. For about an hour, Tobias was content to marvel at the illustrations. Each were at least nice but some were breathtaking. The T. rex would probably have been better if they had not almost been eaten by one. Although the deinonychus was even cooler now that he had been one. Even if it did make him think of accidentally attacking Rachel and listening to her complain. Tobias had to admit it was kind of cute now that time had passed. Sixty-five million years had a way of numbing things.

With a little more than an hour remaining though, Tobias was itching to draw some dinosaurs. Not for the first time he wished he had his supplies. Not that they were ever much, a simple sketch pad and a few decent pencils, but still. It was more the sentiment though, since they weren't that much better than using a random pencil and some scrap paper like what he found in Rachel's end table. He wondered what she would like most, maybe an eagle or a grizzly bear.

The alarm startled him so badly he almost broke the pencil. Did he really only have ten minutes left? He set the pencil down, stopped the alarm, and went into Rachel's bathroom to morph. Just in case the lock didn't work. Demorphing didn't take very long and he was glad to be able to see properly again. Not that there was anything wonderful to look at. Since there wasn't any rush and no reason to exert himself, he contented himself with flapping up to her dresser and staring out the window for a few minutes.

The day was decent, bordering on dreary. Overcast now but not terribly. At least not for a hawk anyway, not until it rained. He hadn't noticed the weather before, being absorbed with the book and sketching some things. Doodling really. Tobias turned his attention away from the sky to focus instead on the doodles that he left on Rachel's desk. Were they really good enough for her? He didn't know if it was himself being critical of his own work or that it was just easier to see the flaws now but clearly he was rusty. Why did he even bother? Rachel didn't really care about dinosaurs anyway. Although he couldn't deny that she might like the eagle and the grizzly. It was stupid of him to think so but he hoped she would like it enough to keep. Even if the subject looked a little weird, the eagle flying so close to the bear, it couldn't be that much of a threat. People liked both of them well enough. The eagle was all 'America!' and stuff. But he couldn't get his hopes up, she would probably have to throw it away even if she liked them. A big if though. They were just lame doodles anyway.

It was only when he heard the footsteps that he turned and saw that the door wasn't locked. Oh no! What if Rachel's mom came in? He wouldn't be able to lock the door afterwards. But he couldn't lock it now, not without trying to morph in time. That could take minutes though and it's not like he was good at controlling it, not like Cassie was. When her mom paused on the steps, it didn't sound like she had made it to the landing anyway, Tobias flew to the nearby tree and perched in suspense.

Staring intently, something he could definitely do as a hawk, he waited for Rachel's mom to get closer, to turn the doorknob and enter Rachel's room for whatever reason. A very thin, very pale, silver lining to having relatives who didn't care about you was that they never really barged in. Not that they didn't do so out of respect for his privacy, or respect for him at all, it was just because they didn't care what he did. Well, as long as he was out of their sight when they wanted him to be.

Rachel's mom, something with an N he thought but he couldn't be sure, finally started to move. Tobias could hear her talking on the phone as she walked but he didn't understand. He could hear her clearly, his hearing was excellent, but it was all a bunch of legal terms that didn't mean anything to him. From her escalating volume, it seemed she was having trouble with the person on the other end understanding her as well.

She came close to Rachel's door, almost shouting at someone made her easy to track even if he couldn't see her. While she stood just outside it, she didn't actually come in. Tobias would've had the time to morph if he had done so when he heard her walking but it was too late to start now. He could hear her hand on the doorknob. But wait, it didn't turn. Was she just resting on it? Why? She must have finally gotten her point across because he heard her end the call and complain to an empty house about stupid people and stupid service. He would've held his breath if he had been human, waiting for her to enter or leave.

Tobias felt like cheering when she walked back downstairs. He flapped back inside and morphed on the floor as fast as he could. Morphing almost always seemed to take longer than demorphing. Tobias wasn't sure if that was actually the case or not but that's what it felt like to him. The first thing to change was his organs. They melted and solidified into human organs while the second change, his hair, sprouted. A bird with dirty blonde hair must have been weird if anyone saw. Tobias slowly increased in height while other changes took place. Talons split into toes and became soft flesh, wings became feather covered arms, beak became teeth and lips, and so on until he stopped growing and was fully human.

When it was finally over, he rushed to the door to lock it. "That was way too close." He said to himself, glad that she didn't see anything. Even if all she would've seen is her eldest daughter taking an interest in dinosaurs and art. Tobias sat Rachel's alarm for an hour and thirty minutes.

"I wonder what Rachel is up to." He said to himself. It was nice to actually hear his own voice, he didn't hear it very often being a bird and all. Tobias sat back down at Rachel's desk and picked up the pencil again. He still had a bear leg to finish after all. And maybe start an ankylosaurus. It seemed like something Rachel would like, 20 feet long and almost six feet tall, all armored and covered in spikes. And it had a club for a tail which was definitely cool.

An hour and a half later, the alarm startled him again before he managed to shut it off. Having to start over three different times, accompanied by groaning mostly to hear himself, Tobias thought that his ankylosaurus was now good enough to give to Rachel. He had sketched some flowers nearby but he wasn't sure what plants they actually ate. Tobias hoped it didn't matter. His biggest hope though was that she actually liked it. And the rest of them.

Along with the bear, eagle, and now the ankylosaurus, he had doodled a baby pachycephalosaurus (the spikes were pretty hard to draw that small, especially without practicing for months), half a triceratops, and a deinonychus because he couldn't resist. The bear and eagle were on a separate piece of paper from most of the dinosaurs, but the ankylosaurus had its own half sheet. Tobias set the pencil down and arranged the sketches how he liked. Dinosaur doodles then ankylosaurus, and then the bear and eagle. Or, wait, maybe the bear and eagle then the dinosaur doodles and then the ankylosaurus. Hmm. Ankylosaurus, doodles, then bear and eagle? The placement was more difficult than he thought it would be but it had to be perfect. He rearranged them again. This time the bear and the eagle were above the dinosaur doodles and the ankylosaurus. That was best, yea.

Begrudgingly, Tobias thought that he should go hunt. He wanted to be back before Rachel even if she still had about three hours or so left of school. Tobias stood up and began to demorph. Two minutes later, he flew out of Rachel's bedroom to find breakfast.

Tobias had to spend a lot more time flapping to gain altitude due to there being less thermals than on a sunny day. It wasn't exactly a bad thing though, it gave him something to do. Finally though, he found one. He soared on it, looking down for prey. A group of crows were nearby but he couldn't see a nest and they didn't seem interested in him or any potential prey. Speaking of, there was movement. At the edge of the woods, a fat mouse. Before he was halfway to his breakfast, the crows attacked! <Ah! Stupid crows! Go away and find your own food.> Unfortunately for him, crows don't care about thought speak. Or red tailed hawks. With a mob of stupid crows flying at him, he left them alone. Since he hadn't seen a nest, he didn't think they'd actually be a problem. <Stupid crows.>

He began searching for prey again after he made sure the crows weren't still following him. Farther on now, but still relatively close to Rachel's house, he saw a rabbit. After he double checked and concluded there weren't any birds he had to worry about, he dived. Thankfully, there weren't any more problems and he was able to eat in peace.

Tobias had intended to take his time heading back to Rachel's house. Without any distractions, he realized he was still upset from this morning. Flying always made him feel better. Only ten minutes or so after just flying aimlessly, it started to rain. Gross. With that, he turned around back towards Rachel's. He landed on the birdhouse she had nailed right underneath her window and flapped his wings a bit to shake off any water. Hopefully he would be dry when he morphed back. He flapped down to Rachel's floor and began to morph again.

He was human for the fourth time. Now with hands, he shut her window so her bedroom wouldn't get wet. She would not be pleased if it was. The rain started coming down hard and he was glad he wasn't outside in it. Rain wasn't as bad as being in a body of water but it still brought back bad memories. Being forced to stay inside wasn't bad exactly but when he stayed with his uncle it meant he was drinking all day. It also meant that he ended up yelled at. At best. He shook his head, he wasn't going to think of what the worst was. At least he had Dude to make him feel kind of better when his uncle was being cruel. Dude.

"I miss you, Dude. I'm sorry I had to leave. I hope you're alright." Tobias said to his reflection in the window. Now he was miserable again. He hadn't thought of Dude in months. The fact that he hadn't made him feel worse. Dude was a good cat. A bit wild with a tendency to scratch if you didn't feed him first but still. He'd knead and lay on his chest and purr. When Tobias curled up and bawled his eyes out, Dude would curl up next to him and purr until they both fell asleep. Dude was great.

"Huh. I was the only one with a cat. Jake and I were the only one with pets." Tobias said, surprised. It hadn't occurred to him until just now only two of the six of them had pets. Even Cassie, surrounded by animals, didn't actually have a pet. "I have no idea if Rachel likes cats. Would her mom let her get a cat?" A ridiculous idea popped into his head. It was totally not going to happen. But if it could? He had to wait until Rachel got home to figure everything out. He sat back on her bed and hugged a pillow, reminiscing about Dude.

–––––

School was actually not lame. School was terrible. If she was being honest and away from her mom, school sucked. In general, Rachel didn't really mind it. She did great in her classes and it was sometimes nice to do something so boring. Who cared if people thought she could be mean? Not her. It wasn't her fault people ticked her off, usually after she almost died less than twelve hours earlier. Rachel really didn't think she could be held accountable for morons being morons. Especially not this time.

It all started first period- math. To start, not her favorite subject first thing in the morning. Second, she was running on very little sleep after comforting her boyfriend since four in the morning. Third, Andy. Rachel had been called up the board to answer a math problem which, since she was good at it, wasn't an issue. Andy whistled as she walked by. Now that, that was an issue. "Excuse me?" She whirled on him. They were about even height wise when he wasn't sitting down but he was broader, a football player.

"Nuthin'." Andy said, nonchalantly as if he wasn't a total creep.

"You whistled at me." Rachel said, her hand on his desk and getting in his face.

"Children, let's calm down. I'm sure that he didn't mean it like that. How about you apologize anyway, Andy?" Their math teacher said, trying to diffuse what would certainly be an ugly situation.

"Look, I'm sorry if you can't take a compliment. You just look hot is all. Happy?" Andy apologized.

Rachel glared grizzly bears at him but stomped to the whiteboard and took the long way back to her seat.

That had been big issue number one. Big issue number two happened at lunch.

She and Cassie were walking toward the table that Jake and Marco were currently at. On the way there, Andy and his lackeys decided to interfere in her life again.

"Still looking hot." Andy called while his lackeys whistled their approval. "No wonder that dweeb who ran away was so into you."

"What the hell did you just say?" Rachel snarled, a white knuckled grip on her tray. No wonder these guys looked familiar. They were the bullies who tormented Tobias!

"I said you're hot." He leered.

"Go to hell." Rachel was on the verge of shouting, very aware of Cassie's pleading expression.

"Whatever, psycho. At least the freak probably killed himself, less of a chance I can't have yo-"

He was cut off by a metal tray to the face and Rachel yelling words that would definitely get her in trouble with the school and her mom.

"Bitch!" He yelled, throwing a punch with one hand and clutching his bloody nose with the other. The punch went wide.

Rachel was glad because she didn't really know how to fight as a human. She didn't need to morph to take him though. Instead, she punched him in the throat. The fight would've went on longer, and maybe Andy's dirtbag friends would've intervened, but aids pulled them away from each other before it got worse.

Now, Rachel was being lectured by her vice principal, Chapman. The enemy. And not just because he called her mom to take her home for fighting. He had a yeerk in his brain, he was a Controller.

She just stared at him until he was done talking about responsibility (she had no idea what that had to do with anything) and proper conduct and how fighting is never the answer and blah blah blah. Whatever. After she had been in his office for twenty five minutes and twenty three seconds, according to the clock behind him, her mom stormed in.

"You got in a fight?!? You broke that boy's nose! I am so ashamed with you, young lady." Her mom started in on her the second she spotted her. Not hard in what was already a cramped office.

"He started it!" Rachel defended herself.

"They told me you smacked him with a metal tray!" Her mom when truly angry was a sight to behold. It wasn't something that happened often.

"Yea, after he sexually harassed me all day!"

"He did what?" Now Naomi's attention was focused solely on Chapman. Rachel couldn't help but smile. He was gonna get it. Her mom was in full on lawyer mode now.

"Ma'am, his friends tell a very different story." Chapman said, about to explain.

"Rachel, what happened?" Naomi asked without taking her eyes off the man in front of her.

"In math in the morning he whistled at me and called me hot. Then in lunch he called me hot and his friends whistled and then he said that it was a good thing my friend killed himself, which he didn't!, because it improved his chances of 'having me'."

"Ma'am, I-" Chapman was cut off.

"I don't care what you have to say. I'm taking my daughter out of school for the day like you wanted and we'll see about pressing charges against this boy for sexually harassing a 14 year old girl. Rachel." Naomi glared at her daughter's vice principal. Rachel resisted the urge to skip after her mother.

It took them half an hour to get home because they stopped at McDonald's on the way. Rachel told her mom everything that had happened in school, explaining exactly how disgusting Andy and his friends were. She was very tempted to tell her about their past bullying of Tobias but she felt like that could become a complicated situation so she refrained. Unfortunately, her mom wasn't almost a partner at her firm for nothing.

"What about the friend you mentioned in the office? You only brought him up once." She prompted her daughter.

"It's not that important." Rachel deflected.

"Honey. This could be important."

Rachel decided it was easier to just say it and convince her mom not to press charges after. "This boy used to go to our school. Andy and his stupid friends picked on him a lot. Today Andy said that it was a good thing he killed himself. But Andy doesn't know crap. He did not kill himself."

"You've never mentioned this boy before. What happened to him? Did he transfer out because he was being bullied?"

"No. He, uh, ran away. His home life wasn't great."

"Do you know where he lives? If he's your age, he shouldn't be living by himself. It's not safe."

"I haven't talked to him in months." She lied.

Naomi frowned but changed the subject. "Do you want to press charges against Andy?"

"No." Rachel said instantly. That could bring unwanted attention, yeerk and otherwise.

"Are you sure? I know it can be difficult but if you want to, you should be able."

"No, it's fine. He was just a creep. I doubt he'll start stuff like that again." She couldn't help but be proud of herself. He got a small amount of what he deserved for being a creep and a bully.

Her mom didn't say anything but her smile seemed to agree. The listened to the radio while she drove and Rachel ate her salad. Going to fast food places as a vegetarian could be difficult. She kept most of her fries to give to Tobias though. Hopefully he was still there.

She thanked her mom before taking her fries up to her bedroom. Normally her mom would've said something about no food in her room but today seemed to be an exception. Rachel turned her doorknob, unsure if it would open. It did. "Tobias?" She whispered. Her room was empty.

"I'm still here, I couldn't tell if it was you or not." He said, stepping out of her bathroom.

"I'm glad you're still here." Rachel said, honestly. "How long do you have in morph?" She put her bag down and tossed her jacket on top of it.

"About an hour and fifty minutes. I just morphed back. You're here early. Did they let you go early because of the rain?" He asked, sitting on her dresser.

"No, uh, I got in a fight." Rachel said. She sat the french fries on her dresser. "Those are for you by the way. I know you like them."

"You got in a fight? Are you ok? Did anyone see you morph?" He asked, ignoring the food.

"I didn't morph. Some dude was being a creep so I punched him in the throat."

"You're amazing." Tobias said.

Rachel smiled. "I had to. Not only was he being creepy towards me but I think he was one of the guys who used to bully you." She leaned against the dresser, looking up at him.

"Really?" Tobias didn't know how to feel about that.

"Yea. It felt great since he insulted you to. It's mostly why I did it."

"Are you saying you're my knight in shining armor?" He asked, taking a fry.

She shrugged. "I can be. You don't really need one unless people are insulting you at school. Are you giving me permission to do my knightly duty to beat them up for you?"

"You don't need to do that." He said before eating more fries. They were gone in seconds and Rachel was smirking at him. "Thanks."

"Did you eat today?" She was only half joking.

"Yea, I ate for a bit. The rain kind of got in the way of things." Tobias said. Being mobbed by crows was a lot less impressive than punching someone in the throat, she didn't need to know about that. "I liked the books. I didn't really look at the second one yet, I was busy with the first one."

"I'm glad you liked it." She said.

"It's really cool. But I didn't look at it for very long actually."

"Oh."

"Uh..." He trailed off while his face got pink.

"What?" Rachel asked. Why was he embarrassed?

"...I drew you something. I, uh, hope you like it." Tobias turned away before he could see her reaction. He pointed at her desk but didn't move. If he was still entirely human, he might have bit his lip because he as so nervous. Now he was just nervous.

Rachel approached the desk carefully. Tobias had never drawn her anything before and she was going to treat it with the respect it, and he, deserved. The first thing she saw was the page of dinosaur sketches. Half a triceratops, that was easy to figure out. Some dinosaur she didn't know the name of but had seen before. It had a dome head and spikes. It was either a lot smaller than she thought it was or it was a baby. The last thing was definitely familiar. "Hey, it's the Danny what-you-ma-call-it. Neat. This one isn't going to slash my stomach open, is it?" She teased.

"They're called deinonychus." He corrected, rolling his eyes at her comment. Inwardly he was ecstatic. She liked his lame doodles! "There are more."

She sat the page down and picked up the half sheet of paper. The picture covered it, a spiky dinosaur standing in a meadow or some grassy area. There were a bunch of flowers around. "This is excellent, Tobias. What's it called?"

"Ankylosaurus. It was about twenty feet long and over five feet tall. I figured you'd like it." He explained.

"It definitely looks like it could do some damage. I meant it was really good though. How long did it take? It looks like it would've taken a while." She put it back on her desk but came back to stand near him. This time she put her hand on his knee.

"It took over an hour and a half. I had to start over a couple of times because I didn't like the way it ended up. But you like it though?" He asked, hesitantly.

"Yea! You did such a great job, Tobias." She grinned at him.

"I'm glad you like it. I'm not sure what you'll think of the last one." He said, feeling almost as nervous as he did the day he first started a conversation with her. Almost.

Rachel rubbed his knee before heading back to her desk. Obviously she had noticed there was a third picture but she hadn't actually seen the subject. She gasped when she saw it. A grizzly bear and an eagle. They were majestic and full of details. Even though it was a pencil sketch, she could pick out each individual feather. Some of the feathers were even being moved by the wind. She had no idea how Tobias was able to showcase how powerful the grizzly was on paper but it was fantastic. "It's beautiful, Tobias. Can I keep these?"

"You want to? They're not that good." He blushed anyway.

"Of course they are! They're great. I love them. Thank you." She hugged him until he hugged her back. "How are you feeling? Any better?"

"Better, yea." He said, glad he didn't flinch anymore when thunder crashed. It used to be really bad but, after living through some as a hawk, he had it mostly under control. Usually anyway. Not exactly right now.

"Do you need to leave?" She asked.

"No. Why? Should I? I can if you need."

"No, I want you to stay. Please." She said, placing her hand on his arm. "It's just that you keep looking out the window every couple of seconds.

He wouldn't deny it. "It's nothing."

"It doesn't seem like nothing." She said.

He looked at her but she couldn't tell what it was supposed to mean. If anything.

"More bad memories to do with rain." He stated.

"I'm sorry." She meant it sincerely. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"My uncle was a roofer. Couldn't work when it rained. He drank more those days. It was harder to avoid him when I was the one who had to clean up and he was constantly making a mess. I'd clean up when he was at work and spend my time in my room mostly. But when it was raining, I had to check up on him every couple of minutes so it wouldn't get too bad. He'd yell and...stuff. If it got too bad. Or if he thought I was 'ignoring my responsibilities'. I'd usually spend time with Dude afterwards."

She took him by the hand and lead him to her bed. When he sat down she hugged him. "You didn't deserve that. I hope you know that."

Tobias didn't say anything.

"Tobias." Rachel said.

"What?" It was a lot more strained than he wanted it to be.

"It wasn't your fault that your uncle was an awful person who did awful things to you. Nothing you did made him do any of it. He would've done it no matter how 'responsible' you were. Evil people like justifying evil things to themselves. Ok?"

"Yea, ok." He knew she was right but he wished he didn't doubt it. "Do you like cats?"

"Cats? The musical or the animal?"

"The animal."

"Yea. Cats are nice. Why?"

"I was thinking about Dude. My cat. Sort of. I fed him and occasionally looked after him. He spent a lot of his time outside. But, well, I became a hawk and couldn't do that anymore." He said, the good mood from Rachel's compliments leaving.

"What happened to him?" She asked.

"I don't know." He shrugged. "I was hoping you could help actually."

"Let's do it."

–––

Because of the fight Rachel got into the day before, she was free all of today. It's how she found herself following Tobias to the crappy part of town. Her mom would probably call it the bad side of the bad side of the tracks.

<How are you doing?> She asked him.

<I'm hoping this is worth it.> He said. Not exactly an answer but she wasn't going to push it, she could read between the lines. He didn't want to be back here.

They flew for a couple more minutes. <Up ahead.> He told her before he circled down to perch on a tree in his old yard. She followed suit but it must have looked weird to any bird watchers.

Tobias looked through the windows, either for his uncle or for his cat. Neither were visible. He landed near the back door. <Clear?> He asked.

<Clear. No people around.> Rachel said. She was lookout, since Tobias knew the layout of the house and was someone Dude would trust. If they found him.

Tobias demorphed as quickly as he could and found the spare key he kept buried near the steps. With the door unlocked, he slipped inside just in case anyone was outside.

The first thing that greeted him was the stench. He couldn't help it, he froze. His uncle must not have cleaned up recently because it reeked of alcohol and cigarettes. Tobias pictured his uncle smashing plates because the food wasn't made right or his uncle sneering at him for being bullied again. His uncle taking him to play paintball to 'toughen up' and laughing as tears welled up in his eyes from the pain. Or his uncle screaming, reeking of alcohol so badly Tobias wanted to puke, while he was dragged up the stairs to the bathroom bawling his eyes out. Tobias shook himself out of it before he could relive the entire thing. Angrily, he realized he was crying. He wiped the tears away and peeked around the corner from the kitchen to the living room. The most dangerous part of the house. Thankfully, his uncle wasn't home. It would've been strange because his van wasn't here but it couldn't hurt to be too careful. Coudln't hurt anymore anyway. Quietly, now out of habit more than necessity, he made his way to his old bedroom.

With how dusty it was and how little his uncle cared, it was possible this was the first time the room had been opened since he became a hawk. His Star Trek calander, now totally wrong, was still there. The date he circled, a fake deadline so he could work up the courage to talk to Rachel, was he only thing he'd marked. Dude was nowhere to be found though. Tobias searched anyway. Under the bed, in the closet, even in the little box Tobias had set up so Dude could have a bed. In case Dude decided to not sleep with him. It was still unused. It made him smile even if Dude wasn't there, as much of a long shot as it would have been. He wasn't ready to give up just yet though so, just in case, he grabbed the cat carrier from his closet.

Slowly, he made his way outside. Just on the off chance Dude was inside somewhere. But no, he went outside without Dude showing up. It definitely sucked. Even though Rachel had to have seen him wipe his eyes, she didn't say anything.

<No Dude.> Tobias said.

<That sucks.> Rachel said as she flew down.

<Yea.> He said.

Before either of them could demorph, Tobias heard a hiss. But not the kind from a snake. A cat hiss. A blur of movement from his left. A cat swiped at Rachel in her eagle morph though she made it back to the tree before it could do any real damage. It's fur was gross and matted, patches of it torn away, and it was missing a bit of its ear that it she thought it had recently.

"Dude!" Tobias exclaimed, crouching down. He resisted the urge to stick his hand out since the cat might not recognize him anymore. To his absolute surprise, Dude rubbed his head against his hand without a second thought. "Haha. Hey buddy. How are you? Got in a fight, huh? I bet you kicked butt. Sorry about your ear anyway." He sat down, cross legged and Dude hopped up and relished in his attention. <It's Dude! Oh my god, I didn't think this would work! This is great!> He wasn't ashamed to start tearing up again.

<That's awesome, Tobias. I should demorph soon. It might be a good idea to put Dude in the cat carrier. Animals don't have a good track record for not freaking out during morphing. I'll carry it for you if you want.> Rachel said.

<Yea, you're probably right. This is so great though. What are the chances your mom will actually let you keep him?> He asked, drying his eyes before opening the carrier. With one hand of course so he didn't have to stop petting his cat. After he unlocked the door, he alternated between snapping the fingers of his free hand and flapping his wrist.

<After Cassie checks him out and I buy all the stuff? Probably 70%. After Sarah and Jordan freak out, probably a hundred.> Rachel said. <I'd keep him even if she didn't want me to though.>

<Really? You'd do that for me?>

<Well, not just for you. My sisters and I have always wanted a cat. But yea, he means way too much to you for me to just give up. And when have you known me to give up anyway?>

<That's true.> Tobias said. "Ok, Dude, I know you hate this but it's time to put you in here. Can you do that for me? Please don't scratch me." Gently, but quickly, he pushed his cat inside the cat carrier and closed it. <You're good.>

<Thanks.> Rachel said, looking around to make sure no one was around. She landed back on the ground and began to demorph. <Crap.> Before she could elaborate, she lost the ability to thought speak. Her feathers receded first followed by her hair sprouting from the eagle's head. She grew in size while her bones were being rearranged. The last thing to change were her talons. Right before they became toes, she looked like some weird science experiment. A human girl with the feet of a very, very, large bird.

"What's wrong?" Tobias asked while he made sure Dude seemed comfortable.

"We have a long way to walk." Rachel said, gesturing to herself.

Tobias stared. In his defense that's usually what he spent his days doing. It did take him a second to figure out what was so wrong though. And maybe Rachel making a noise in her throat. "Oh. The morphing outfit. Yea. Ok. I could find a t-shirt or something for you. I don't think any of my pants would fit. If you want."

"Sure. I'll wait out here with Dude." Rachel said. She bent down and her hair got in her face. If she was smiling at the thought of wearing some of Tobias' clothes, he didn't need to know that just yet. Tobias nodded before going back inside.

"Hey, Dude." She said to the cat. He was a long grey cat with black strips. There would be more black but some of his fur had been torn away. Rachel wasn't sure how. As an eagle, she could see he had fleas but now she could see that he also had a tick. Hopefully it wasn't the kind that had Lyme disease. If cats got Lyme disease. The cat didn't seem interested in her.

Tobias came back a couple minutes later carrying what was probably his old backpack. He pulled out a sweater and a large t-shirt. "The shirt was always huge on me so that will probably fit better. But the sweatshirt should fit you fine to. Oh, I've also got shoes. They're new. Well, not new because," he gestured to the house and the surrounding area. "Lightly used. New socks though. I've also got some canned food and toys for Dude. I was going to grab the blankets I used for a bed for him but he never used them so I didn't. I also have an unopened bag of dry cat food but I don't know if that'll be good or not. Most of the stuff in here is for Dude but I have some of my stuff to. Not that you need to keep that at your place, I can leave it with Ax at his scoop." He was fine with that option but he was secretly hoping Rachel would want to keep it in her room. It would give them an excuse to spend more time together at least.

"You are such a dork." Rachel said, fondly. The shirt was for Jurassic Park and the sweater had the Star Wars logo on the chest. "I don't think I've ever heard you talk this much in one go. Don't stop though because it's super cute. I'm glad you love him so much." She pulled the t-shirt on over her leotard and put on the sneakers he offered. Talk about fashion disaster. At least she wasn't walking around with no shoes and just her leotard. Even if the shoes were uncomfortable. The gesture was sweet though.

"I want to carry him for a bit but I don't know if we'll find somewhere secluded enough for me to demorph." Tobias admitted.

"You're probably better off morphing now since no one is around. You could talk to me about him though while I carry him. And your bag." Rachel said, taking his bag from him before he could decided not to demorph. She put the sweater back in and zipped it up.

"I guess you're right." Tobias said, standing behind her and his cat. It probably wouldn't do much but Dude might not freak out if he didn't see him morph back to a hawk. After he was fully hawk and flying once more more, Rachel started the walk to the mall.

Rachel was headed to the mall, not her house, because she could get a ride from Cassie's parents there without a lot of questions. Rather than the worst part of town. And this way they could also check out Dude so she could present a slightly cleaner cat to her mom. Like she told Tobias, she was going to keep him no matter what her mom said.

<What kind of story should I tell you about Dude?> Tobias asked Rachel from the sky, even though she couldn't respond. <How I found him? What he likes to do? Something else?>

Rachel stopped walking.

<Something else?>

She started walking again.

<Ok. Hmm.> Tobias thought for a minute and couldn't think of anything. <I'm gonna fly around so I can read your lips.>

Rachel trusted that, even though she couldn't see Tobias' line of sight, he would make sure he could read her lips. She waited until she could see him fly towards her. Well, in the opposite direction she was walking. "Wrist snapping?" She questioned.

<Oh, that. I don't know actually. It's just a thing I do when I get really happy. I used to pace when I did it to if I was super, super, excited about something. I made sure not to do it in front of people though. My uncle and aunt would always complain about it and I didn't need to give them more reasons to.> Tobias confessed. Though he was back to flying in the same direction she was walking, he could see Rachel make a swirling motion with her finger and he took it as a command to fly around. As well as when she flinched when he talked about his aunt and uncle. He flew around, making sure to slowly and far enough so she could say a lot if she needed.

"It's cute. You can do it in front of me if you want." She offered. Even though this was the most he had morphed human since he could, she wanted to make sure Tobias could be comfortable. If it meant he was human more often, that definitely didn't hurt.

<Thanks. You're probably the first person to say that.> Tobias said, nonchalantly.

The way Tobias casually talked about how awful his childhood was, how abusive his guardians were, always hurt her. It also made her mad. Angry. Furious. Similar words for wanting to scare the hell out of them and make them sorry for ever even thinking about hurting Tobias.

<You look upset.> He flew around again to see if she her reply.

"Doesn't matter. Tell me a story about Dude." She said. Rachel was glad their current situation made it easy to not talk about how mad his childhood made her. Tobias didn't like her getting mad on his behalf, at least about his aunt and uncle. If he kept talking about them though, she knew she was going to have to get Ax and/or Marco to help her do something stupid. Stupid but totally worth it. She might even have to reign Ax in.

<Sure! Dude is a great cat. He's super nice once he likes you but will claw anyone else's face off. This one time, either he didn't like my uncle or knew that I....that I wasn't happy with him. Uh, he was laying on my chest purring like a storm because he has this spot behind his ears, slightly towards the left, that he goes nuts over. It's usually hard to pet him after that because of how much he likes it. It's great. Anyway, I was doing that when my uncle barged in and the both of us freaked out. My uncle basically just left me alone all the time, that was one of the only times he ever came into my room. Maybe the only time actually. I don't remember why he did though, just that he was mad. Obviously he was drunk but that time he was angry. Like, super angry. Probably as angry as he was drunk. He got drunk, like, all the time but a couple of times he got angry drunk like...like that. So, uh, anyway, he was shouting about whatever and I tried to turn when Dude lept off my stomach, hissing and clawing at his cheek. My uncle kept him outside for the night but he stopped yelling.>

After a couple of minutes of silence, Tobias spoke up. <Sorry, that wasn't the kind of story I meant to tell you. I know that's bad.>

Fortunately for him, Tobias was spared Rachel's angry ranting about how awful his uncle was since she couldn't use thought speak as a human. She scowled. That was it, she was definitely going to get Ax and Marco. Tomorrow though, tonight she had a cat to introduce to her mother. Lovely.

It didn't take a lot longer to get to the mall. When they got there, Rachel realized that with a cat, cat litter is needed. Tobias gladly offered to morph and watch him outside while Rachel bought stuff. They had to hope Cassie didn't get there in time to see him. Or that she could distract her dad long enough if she did. They found a secluded area near the dumpsters for Tobias to morph before Rachel went inside. Tobias sat on a bench near the entrance with the cat carrier next to him. It didn't really bother him it was still damp from the rain yesterday.

"Hey, Dude. I'd let you out but I don't want you to run away, ok? Just relax like you've been doing." Tobias spoke to his cat. He thought Dude was being remarkably patient, he had never been in the carrier this long. Dude was pacing around inside but was being very quiet about it. Had something happened to his vocal cords? Tobias hoped not. Cats made great sounds. When you're a human anyway. It's want usually great to hear a cat when you were a bird, even if you were a red tailed hawk.

Tobias poked his fingers in the door for Dude to play with. Dude rubbed himself against them and it seemed to Tobias like he couldn't decide if he wanted his head rubbed more or his tail, going around and around in a circle against his fingers. He focused on petting Dude and snapping with his free hand so he could try and ignore people staring at him. After a couple minutes though he had to stop, even if he was still ridiculously happy. The stares were too much for him to handle, he knew he'd start remembering stuff he didn't want to if anyone said anything and he had done enough of that already. Sighing, he withdrew his hand and waited for Rachel.

Thankfully, it only took a couple minutes before he could see Rachel walking towards the door. It was someone who looked like Rachel anyway. Maybe. He was basically blind as a human. She stepped outside and he could tell it wasn't her. Oh. The disappointment that settled in his gut shocked him. He had just seen her a couple minutes ago after all.

Seconds stretched into minutes. Minutes stretched into what felt like half an hour. Finally, Rachel walked outside. He could tell it was her now and was almost ashamed he had mistaken that other girl for Rachel. Rachel was so much lovelier.

"Sorry, it's the mall." Rachel said when she walked up to him. She had a few big bags in her hands from two different companies. One was a pet store, Tobias could see the cat litter in one bag and the litter box in the other, but he couldn't see into the other bag. "Come on." They walked back towards the dumpsters, while Rachel assured him it was nothing and she would be able to carry everything.

Tobias demorphed and flew upwards. He didn't go very far, just to the little triangle thing above the mall entrance. Just in case Rachel needed him for anything. She didn't sit down on the bench but she did but Dude's carrier back on it. <Your ride is here.> He told her, spotting Cassie as her dad pulled into the parking lot. They made their way to the entrance and pulled up in front of Rachel.

"Thank you for the ride, sir." Rachel said as she got in his truck. Dude was placed on the floor with her bags so she could sit Tobias' backpack on her lap. She watched as Tobias himself flew off, sure to get to Cassie's barn before them.

"No problem at all! I must say I'm surprised though. I didn't expect the pet store at the mall to sell cats." Cassie's dad said as he pulled out of the parking lot.

"I don't know if they do, actually. I got this dude off the road actually. And the cat carrier." Rachel explained. "I bought the cat litter and litterbox at a pet supply store. It's separate."

"What's in the other bag you got? If you need, Cassie can put some of that in the back."

"Sure." Cassie answered for Rachel, moving the larger bags to the back seat. Rachel now had some room for her feet.

"The other bag are art supplies. Gift for a friend." Rachel explained.

"The cat doesn't look too good. Want me to give him a once over?" Cassie asked like the entire cat thing wasn't prearranged.

"That would be great, yea. Mom isn't going to be very happy with a cat, a lot less with one with fleas."

"Are you sure your mom is going to let you keep him?" Cassie's dad asked.

"Yea. She'll probably be mad for a bit but once I get Jordan and Sara to pester her, she'll have to cave. I think she's a cat person anyway."

"Are you going to let your sister's pick a name?" He asked.

"Nope. His name is Dude. His previous owner said so and I think it fits. And I paid for him anyway."

"The perks of being an older sister."

Rachel didn't think that made a lot of sense compared to the rest of the conversation but she wasn't going to say anything. It seemed to be an old man thing, her dad did it to. Neither of them were grandpa aged but still. Besides the awful country music Cassie's dad liked screeching on the radio, the ride was quiet.

They piled out of the truck when they got to the barn. Rachel dutitifuly handed off the cat carrier to her best friend. Cassie and her dad walked into the lab section but she stayed outside. Not that she was squeamish or anything. Seeing them do whatever to the cat, even if it was just apply flea powder and get rid of the tick, would've made her antsy. It was always better to do something rather than just watch in her opinion.

<How is he?> Tobias asked from a rafter. Not his usual one though, he didn't want to be seen by Cassie's dad. Which had been why he hadn't been in the barn when they got there.

Rachel shrugged. 'I'm not in there.' She mouthed. It wouldn't do any good to be seen having a one way conversation with a hawk.

<Fair. I hope he's ok. Or that they can treat him if he isn't.> Tobias preened himself. Rachel knew it was something he did, more often than not, if he was nervous.

'It'll be ok. They said there hasn't been a case of a cat with Lyme disease so that isn't something to worry about. There is cat related tick stuff to worry about though.'

<Oh.>

'Yea.'

<I hope he's ok.> Tobias repeated.

'I know. He's in good hands though. You'll be petting him in no time.' Rachel mouthed.

They waited. And waited. And waited. Rachel played with the hay she sat on while Tobias preened. Rachel moved the bag with her gifts for Tobias behind the other ones when he had his head buried in his wing. Hopefully he hadn't seen it.

'What's your favorite dinosaur?' Rachel asked after what felt like forever.

<As a kid? T-Rex, all the way. Now? I have to be at least a little partial to the deinonychus. Maybe the ankylosaurus, it was my second favorite as a kid. Or maybe the Hadrosaur. They didn't try to kill us. And I did get to see them. That's still super cool. Actual dinosaurs. We were dinosaurs! Yea, it eventually sucked but, come on. Dinosaurs!> Tobias kept talking but it very quickly made no sense to Rachel. Something about families and clades and Jurassic Park and real dinosaurs. It was nice to hear him so animated about something from his childhood even if she was totally lost.

As Cassie opened the lab door, Tobias flew out of the barn. Tobias could tell it wasn't Cassie's dad but he couldn't be far behind so it made sense to Rachel that he would leave. "What took so long? How is he? Is he ok? He's ok, right?"

"Yea, he's fine. He's alright. Sorry it took, like, half an hour. We couldn't find the cat flea powder. My dad says you should watch out for signs of lethargy and any abnormal behavior. You should probably bring him back in a week just to be sure. Then bring him to a vet for shots and all that. You might want to get him neutered to." Cassie reported.

"Thank god." Rachel said as her dad came out with Dude in the cat carrier. "I was hoping nothing bad happened."

"Dad says he can drop you off in a couple minutes, he just needs to fill out some old paperwork or something." Cassie said.

"Thanks."

<Thanks you, Cassie.> Tobias said from somewhere. Rachel was pretty sure he couldn't see them but figured he could hear them well enough. She thought he sounded immensely relieved even in thoughtspeak.

"No problem." Cassie replied. "He's a cute cat."

<Yea.>

"Look at you, getting all soft." Rachel teased.

He didn't respond. Rachel thought he must have been embarrassed.

In twenty minutes, Rachel was standing outside her door with the cat carrier in one hand and shopping bags on her arms. Along with Tobias' backpack on her shoulder. And with a too big Jurassic Park t-shirt and what looked like leggings. She didn't think she had ever even seen Jurassic Park. Maybe she could watch it with Tobias. Taking a breath, she opened the door.

"Rachel! Where have you been, young lady? You've been gone for hours! And you left the house looking like that? Like a...a ragamuffin?" Naomi scolded her eldest child.

"I found a cat. Cassie and her dad cleaned him up for me. His name is Dude." Rachel explained.

"And what makes you think I'm going to let you keep a cat?" She demanded.

"Because I'm going to look after him and all that. And his owner couldn't look after him anymore. He even gave me food for him. Cassie treated him with flea powder. I'll pay for more food and I already bought a litterbox and everything."

"You realize that means i'll be paying for all of that, right?"

"Well, yea, technically. But it's either that or clothes and you always tell me I can spend it how I need to. And I need to take care of him."

Her mom sighed. "This has something to do with that boy, doesn't it?"

"Eww, Andy? That dirtbag? No way!" Totally gross.

"No, the other one. Toby?"

"It's Tobias." Oops. Stupid lawyer skills.

"I thought so. So it's Tobias' cat? And he can't take care of him anymore because he's homeless?" Rachel's mom asked.

Rachel had in no way expected the conversation to end up where it had. There was a lot less 'no' and 'absolutely not'. "Yea." She said, honestly.

"Fine. But you're taking care of everything and if it bites or scratches Sara, we're giving it to Cassie."

"Wow, uh, really? That's it? Thanks!" Rachel's enthusiasm was cut short.

"One more condition."

Uh oh.

"I want to talk to this Tobias."

What?

"Uh, what?"

"Rachel, honey, there's no way you just so happened to find the homeless cat of a homeless boy you haven't talked to in months. And that backpack definitely isn't yours."

"But-"

"Rachel. You lied to me the other day. I'm ignoring that and letting you keep this cat. I'm talking to the boy or he can keep the cat. You can tell him that I won't have someone from DCYF here either even though I probably should."

"Alright." There was no way Rachel saw that she could get out this. Maybe if one of the others were here, they could've thought of something. "When?"

"What's today? Friday? Sunday. I don't have work."

"What time?" This cat was lucky she liked Tobias so much, it was proving to be a complicated mess.

"Why don't you invite him out for brunch?"

"Uh, are you feeling ok? You want someone coming to Sunday brunch? You don't want Cassie to and she's practically family. You hardly want Jake to and he's actually family."

"He and this cat are clearly important to you. I want to know the boy who can get you of all people out in public dressed like...that." Naomi said.

Rachel had to admit that last point made sense. She looked pretty bad but it had been absolutely worth it. "I'll see what I can do." She said. Before her mom could say anything else, she rushed to the safety of her bedroom.

<Can you keep him?> Tobias asked excitedly, perched on her desk.

"Yea, but mom wants to meet you. For Sunday brunch which is a big thing for her. Jake is barely allowed over and he's family." Rachel said. "You should probably morph before I let him out."

<Yea>. Tobias said, excitement obvious even in thoughtspeak. He flew to the ground and began to morph into human. About two minutes later, he walked over to the cat carrier. "Hey, Dude. Please don't freak out on us." With that out of the way, he opened the cage.

Dude bounded out and instantly ran up Tobias' leg and climbed up to his stomach. Tobias cradled him in his arms with a smile. His smile grew into a grin when Dude started to rub his head against his chest. Bunting, Tobias recalled. It was adorable. He adjusted his arms so that he could hold him with one and pet him with the other.

"Bunting and kneading are so great. That and purring. Obviously." Tobias told Rachel. He sat down on her bed to make Dude more comfortable but he only slid down his stomach a little. "How're you doing, buddy? Ok? You'll do great here." Dude started to purr and Tobias thought it was just good as flying. Maybe even better.

Rachel was almost in shock. Tobias was grinning. Even though expressions were usually difficult for him now, as a human, it didn't seem like it had been forced at all. She didn't think she had ever seen him so happy before, he was practically buzzing. "I don't think I've ever seen you so happy before. You must really love him. I'm glad you were able to find him. Tell me more about him?" Rachel sat down next to him, one hand on his lap and the other held out to Dude.

Dude gave her a brief look and sniffed her fingers. He went back to being pet by Tobias. Rachel withdrew her fingers. There was plenty of time to get acquainted with him.

"Sorry. He'll get used to you." Tobias said.

"Yea, it'll be fine. It might be easier if he could smell you though." Rachel replied. Which would of course mean Tobias would have to spend more time in her room. As a human.

"Probably, yea. I'm not looking forward to the eventual skirmish between me and him though. It's bound to happen at least once outside of my morph."

"I'll try and put him in the carrier before you come in and morph. Hopefully we can avoid that. I'm not sure who would win. No offense."

"I understand."

"So, tell me something about Dude." She said.

"You can't really tell right now but usually his fur is awesome. Well, it was for a bit before he went outside again. But once a week I would give him a bath and his fur was like silk or something. Long and smooth. That's another thing, he doesn't really have a problem with water. He liked to hop in the shower with me sometimes to even though I like them hot. It was too difficult to wash him up every time he did though, getting supplies for him was usually hard." Tobias wished that not everything he said had to end on a bitter note.

Dude started squirming in his lap but, at least he thought so anyway, it was because he missed being pet. It didn't seem like a bad kind of squirming but he wasn't a cat expert and it had been a while since he had spent time with him. Tobias was pretty sure he was happy though.

"I don't know what else to tell you about him." Tobias admitted.

"Did he ever bring you any mice or anything?" Rachel asked.

Tobias thought about it for a second. "Maybe just once. I think. I don't really remember." He refrained from mentioning his uncle being annoyed with it, even though it hadn't been a big deal Rachel would've been upset.

"How'd you get into drawing?" Rachel asked out of nowhere.

"What? Uh, I was always coloring as a little kid and stuff. My art teacher alway encouraged me to draw at home to get more practice. In a good way, you know? Professor Powers, a woman who lived near my aunts house, bought me my first sketch pad and artist pencils. She had a bunch of raspberry bushes and I helped her with them sometimes. They were my first still lifes. It was fun." He said, remembering some of the few memories he had that weren't spoiled. Dude began to purr in his lap which made Rachel and Tobias smile.

"How'd you meet her?" Rachel asked seriously, interested but wary.

"Nothing bad." He said. Was his life really that bad? She was not convinced.

"I stole raspberries from her garden." He explained. "I was running around on the beach, near some houses, and saw delicious looking black raspberries. I took some without realizing they belonged to the house on the top of the hill. She called me and I almost bolted. When she laughed I realized she wasn't mad. So I went inside. She made apple cider, cinnamon rolls, and raspberry tarts and told me stories about when she was around my age. The only one I remember is about this girl she dated in secret who always smelled like lilacs. Which is all I remember about the girl. It was great. I went back a couple times and she gave me the sketch pad and pencils the second to last time I was there. She gave me some art advice. I have no idea if I used any of it or what it is anymore though."

Rachel grinned down at him. "That sounds amazing, Tobias."

"Yea." He agreed, leaning his head on her shoulder.

"What else is yours in your backpack?" She asked him

"Mostly books. Sentimental stuff." He wasn't meting her eye and missed the spark in them.

"Like what?" She was very interested in what Tobias thought precious enough to take and leave with her. Well, Ax maybe but she was planning on keeping his stuff here.

"I wasn't expecting the Spanish Inquisition." He said with a soft smile.

"What?" Rachel wasn't sure if she should be upset or if he was making some nerd joke. "I just wanted to know what you like enough to leave with me." She settled for slightly upset.

"I'm sorry. I guess it was a bad time for a joke. It was a reference to a Monty Python sketch." Tobias explained, wishing he didn't still have to fight off the fear in his stomach when someone was even slightly angry with him. Especially Rachel.

"What do drawings have to do with me asking questions?" She asked.

"Uh, sorry, not that kind. Comedy sketch. Monty Python is a British comedy thing. They had a tv series like thirty years ago or something. One of their things is about the Spanish Inquisition. This guy comes in saying something and the woman he's talking to keeps asking him a bunch of questions. Finally he says "Well, I wasn't expecting the Spanish Inquisition." and three Cardinals bust through the door screaming "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition" and they list off a bunch of weapons they have. It's funnier if you'd watch it."

"We could do that sometime. Same with Jurassic Park. Settle in for a movie night after I rent them. If Blockbuster would have Monty Python." Rachel offered.

"That's a great idea. They might." Tobias agreed. It sounded amazing.

"Cool." Rachel said. She didn't say anything for a few minutes. "You don't have to tell me what's in your bag if you don't want to. I just wanted to know because obviously it would be important to you and I wanted to keep them around for you. And I want to know about what's important to you."

"Oh." That was incredibly sweet of her. "Thanks, Rachel. It means a lot. Here, I'll show you." He said, getting up. Dude laid down in his spot, pressing up against Rachel's thigh. Tobias left a quick kiss on the back of her hand, very embarrassed from the overt display of affection. Even in the seclusion of her bedroom. Afterwards, he rifled through his backpack to pull out his things though he left the books inside for now. He carried them over to her gingerly. Somewhat embarrassed because he cared so much, he placed them on the bed in front of her.

The first thing Rachel saw was an old recipe card for raspberry tarts and she knew instantly where he got it from. She thought it was very sweet of him. The other stuff she saw was a small bag like the kind to hold earrings, a thin vial of sand and bits of sea shells, and a feather. Specifically, the tail feather of a red tail hawk. She couldn't help it, she laughed.

"That's a fantastic choice for a feather, Tobias." Rachel smiled.

"I found it on the beach after the first day of school here." He said. "I didn't even know what kind of bird it belonged to when I picked it up, just that it could fly. It is a little funny now."

"Do you want to open the bag?" Rachel asked.

He looked embarrassed. "It's a nerd thing."

"That's alright." She meant it. Sure she teased him about him being a geek sometimes but this was important.

"Don't laugh?" He asked.

"Not anymore." She said, looking him in the eye.

He nodded and dumped the bag upside down. Out rolled seven dice. One was sky blue, three were a sort of gold close to their hair, and the last three were brown like a grizzly bear's fur.

"I have no idea what those are for." She stated.

"It's super lame of me to even have." He started, needing a pause. "It's for Dungeons and Dragons which, sure, is nerdy but the fact that I have them makes me a total loser."

"You're not a loser for having freakin' dice, Tobias." Rachel said.

"Well, yea, not exactly. But it's a group game and I never had anyone to play with. I kept them hoping I would eventually find people to play with. See? Lame." Tobias said, bitterly. Since it would have only made her angry, he kept out the fact that he had been mocked for weeks with that exact language. The good mood he was in just seconds ago evaporated. He had never once played the game before or seen anyone play either. But he kept them in case he ever got friends. "It took joining a war given to us by my dying alien father for me to get enough friends to play."

"Tobias, listen to me. You're not a loser for not having friends. Especially not for wanting friends. Everybody wants friends. Humans are social animals. And like you said, now there's enough people to play. So why don't we play? Heck, it gives us all a reason to meet up. Let's do it." Rachel said, threading their fingers together when he sat down. Tobias sat on the opposite side of her so he didn't disturb Dude.

"You know nothing about the game." He protested.

She snorted. "So what? I know enough. It's a fantasy game and you beat people up. And you really want to play so I'm in."

Tobias didn't correct her that it meant more to have friends than the actual game. He did want to play after all. "Alright. We can bring it up to the others later."

"Sounds good. So, what's up with the sand and sea shells?" Rachel asked.

"I really like the beach." Tobias said, honestly. "I use to spend hours there at my aunts when I could. With school here, I wasn't sure how often I could go to the beach. So a couple days before my first day I found some time to fill it with beach sand and some shells."

"That's cute." Rachel said, kissing his now red cheek.

"Wait, why wasn't school an issue there? Were you there over the summer?" She asked.

"Sort of. You don't actually want to know. You'll just get mad. It doesn't matter." Tobias said.

"It matters to me, Tobias. If it was just over the summer there wouldn't be an issue. What happened? Did you get hurt? Did she hurt you?" Rachel demanded. The fury at his relatives had dulled a bit was now roaring back. As was her conviction that she needed to pay his uncle a visit.

"Uh, no, she wasn't like that. She just made me do a bunch of chores and stuff. Sometimes, she kept me home from school "just to be there" in case she needed me to do something like clean the attic or scrub the dishes." Tobias said, without a tremor in his voice. He very firmly didn't think of the time she shoved his head in the sink because the dishes weren't good enough. Absolutely did not think of it.

"I hate your relatives. I hate them so much. You'll never have to see any of them again. I'm here." She wrapped the shorter boy in a hug as hard as she could.

It helped more than he wanted it to. Tobias wished it just didn't bother him anymore, that he could move on. It's really not like they could do anything to him anymore. Even as he thought it, dread seeped into his bones. Dread that they would find a way to hurt him. To hurt Rachel or any of the animorphs. It made no sense, they were all very capable of taking care of themselves. Especially Rachel and Ax. But it wouldn't go away.

"I know it's stupid..." He trailed off.

"What is?" She asked, attentive.

He gestured to himself. "Just..."

Rachel waited for him to figure out what he needed to say. He was grateful, she was being a lot more patient with him than the others. Tobias pushed the thought away that said it was only because he had been human so often lately.

"You can all morph into things that can handle themselves. But...I'm still afraid he'll find a way to hurt you. It's stupid. He's just some guy and you can be an elephant." Tobias admitted.

"He's not just some guy." Rachel said.

"What? Is he-"

"He's not a Controller. Well, maybe. I don't know. But that's not what I meant. He's not just some guy off the street. He's a guy who hurt you for years. People don't just stop caring about that the second they get away. It makes sense you'd still be afraid. It's ok to be afraid." Rachel told him.

Tobias didn't say anything but he did relax into Rachel's hug. She gave him some time to digest what she said before she continued. "You've also got those kinds of morphs. Morphs that can handle themselves. I know I get...kinda pushy. About spending time like this. But you can demorph and we can go flying over the beach if you want. Or, I don't know, morph hork-bajir or something big and deadly. Even as a human, you can handle yourself. I know you might not think it and I know I said it already but you survived. I don't know how long you had to endure everything you went through but you did. You survived and you got Dude back. You found Ax, actual family that cares about you. You found us. You found me."

"Now, let's go flying over the beach." Rachel said with a smile, kissing her boyfriend on the forehead. "It'll be just us, the beach, and the air. Free."