Work Text:
It had been years since he had last seen McCree. He had always wondered what the cowboy had been doing. Jesse never was one to cope particularly well when anything happened. After what happened with Moira, Genji leaving, and the Swiss Base, Genji was willing to bet McCree was not doing as well as he was.
Genji had found peace. He is at terms with who he is, for the first time in years. He has been able to allow his soul the respite from the fury and self-hatred. All thanks to the help of Zenyatta. Genji was stubborn but so was Zenyatta. And Zenyatta was also patient. He managed to deal with Genji's raging emotions for the better half of five years and for no cost at all. Zenyatta has Genji's gratitude and respect.
However, while Genji got better, it seems Jesse had gotten worse. The man looked tired, eyes ringed with dark circles and his old, crooked grin is now none existent. It reminded Genji with a painful jolt of Gabriel before the incident. How he had seemed to be, in a way, decomposing. His once sharp mind being twisted to the point where he would often times forget things. Maybe it had all started with the Venice Incident. Regardless, Genji would always thank Gabriel for giving him that warning.
Only years later would he wonder if this was all premediated or if he wasn't actually aware of the explosion.
But after all those years, here they were, reunited. Coming back to the same thing that brought them together and destroyed them as well. For Overwatch.
They stood in front of each other. It had been a few years and neither knew how to react. The last time Genji had seen Jesse it had been at Gabriel's funeral.
Jesse seemed hesitant and at a loss at what to do. Where they still as close as they were since the Fall? Do they still really know each other? The questions plagued Genji but for the meantime, he decided to brush them aside. He took the initiative, and walked up to Jesse, hugging him tight. Jesse froze, out of confusion or uncomfort Genji did not know, before slowly returning the hug.
"Changed a bit, haven't ya, ya little ninja?" Jesse mumbled, low voice familiar and comforting. They broke away and leaned next to each other on the wall.
"I could say the same to you, cowboy. Seems you've gained a few pounds since I last saw you." Genji smirked from behind his visor, poking Jesse in the stomach with a finger. Jesse swatted the finger away with a scowl.
"Ain't nothin' there but pure muscle! What about you? Still short as ever I see!" Jesse said, using Genji as a rest. Genji laughed, pushing Jesse away. Jesse stopped and looked at him, surprised amusement and a slight bit of sadness in his eyes.
"What's wrong?" Genji asked, confused at the change in demeanor.
"Nothin'. Just... Ya've changed a lot since I last saw you. It's good. That's good. You're happier and shit. I'm glad." Jesse said softly, smile small. Despite years of being apart, Genji could still read Jesse like the back of his hand.
"Don't think you and Gabriel did not help. I just needed a different enviorment. We all could have used a different enviornment." Genji said, trailing off at the end. Jesse, him, and Gabriel. Maybe they wouldn't have been in this situation if it had been different. Jesse sighed, reaching for a cigar and lighting it. He breathed in and exhaled, smoke billowing from his mouth lazily.
"Reckon you might be right. Guess it just never worked out in our favor."
Genji nodded. The atmosphere was somber, but neither wanted to change that. They both needed this. They needed to let it out. Genji might have meditated with Zenyatta and worked through many of his emotions and problems, but there were some that needed the finality of Jesse. Like how he needed finality with Hanzo.
Genji reached to remove his visor with a hiss. He took off the helm as well, leaving his head exposed with hair poking up in tufts. Jesse looked up at the hiss and stared in surprise at the hair color.
"Well I'll be damned. Never pinned ya as one to dye ya hair, Ji. It looks good," Jesse smiled, ruffling Genji's hair softly.
Genji let out a quiet chuckle.
"Used to dye my hair all the time. Most notably green. Before what happened with my brother." Genji replied, lifting Jesse's hand off his hair gently. Jesse remained quiet and from his peripheral vision, Genji saw his face scrunch up in displeasure. Not at the hair dye but possibly because of how Genji had used to respond to such mentions of his brother and attack.
Genji had grown more into the fact that he had not died that night. He was destroyed. He wa hurt. He just wanted to walk. Yes, those are all true. But he was still Genji Shimada. Still the second son of Sojiro Shimada. Still the Sparrow. Still the little brother to an older brother who had to live with 'killing' him. Hanzo, the older brother he had forgiven. Genji has come to terms with the fact he was still the same Genji. This was just the way his life had turned. It is who he was. He is Genji and always was, even in his darkest moments.
"Jesse, I have talked to my brother." Genji stated, not looking at Jesse. Jesse made a choked noise and turned to him abruptly.
"Huh? Ya what? What happened? Did ya kill him? Did he hurt ya? I swear to whatever god is up there imma kill the slimey bastard-" Genji cut Jesse of quickly, hushing him. He layed his hand on him, trying to relax him.
"No. Jesse. He didn't hurt me. I..." Genji paused. He knew Jesse would not like what he was to say but if they expected to have a useful, honest conversation, both parties should say the truth. "I have forgiven him. He wanted me to kill him. But I could not. I've had years to temper my anger. To live through what he has done to me. Now, I am able to see the truth. And I have forgiven him." Jesse snarled, looking at Genji. He was furious.
"Are you an idiot? Genji, that man destroyed you! He tried to murder you, his own blood! That's too much to excuse! You were downright miserable and hated yourself, all because of him!" Jesse raged, voice raised. Genji calmly waited for him to finish, hearing Jesse's ragged breath. Genji turned to face Jesse, sitting cross-legged and brought Jesse into a hug. Jesse melted, holding him back. "He doesn't deserve you, Genji. He doesn't deserve your forgiveness. People don't change and I would rather die then so you hurt like that again." Genji held onto Jesse tighter. He missed Jesse. He erred on the side of over protected brother but Genji was fine with it. It had helped him remember what it was like with Hanzo before their father died.
"Jesse, it is my forgiveness I give out. It is my choice. I have retained so much anger and fury these past few years only until 5 years ago, since I started with Zenyatta's help. I have begun to heal. It is time for me to finish healing. And I knew I would never be completely healed until I settled things with my brother. He is a broken man. Much like I was when I was in Blackwatch. I had a support system," he said, smiling into Jesse's shoulder. They parted and Genji gave Jesse's broad shoulder a pat. His smile faded. "My brother never had that luxury. I have given him the opportunity to change and for us to heal. Please understand Jesse. I am finally able to decide on a clear concious what I am able to do. Without my anger interfering and clouding my judgement," Genji met Jesse's eyes, brown eyes meeting whiskey colored ones. "I hope you will support me in this endeavor."
Jesse sighed, looking away from Genji, jaw tight. Jesse had conflicting morals most of the time. He would offer to kill someone but he would feel those deaths emotionally. He had a soft soul. He was a kind-hearted man. Genji would always appreciate it.
"Hell, darlin'," Jesse sighed, leaning his head back. "Ya know I never could say to ya, Ji. You're family and I just... I just can't lose another person." Genji clenched his hand, remembering their losses.
"I know. Thank you, Jesse. You were always there for me. Always. I just wish I could have seen that and appreciated it back then and I apologize." Jesse goves a humorless smirk.
"No need to, ninji. Ya were goibg through rough times. We all were. I'm jus' real glad you've gotten better. I am just real happy you're happy." Genji smiled, but it slowly faded. Jesse noticed. "What happened?"
"However happy I seem, I am upset. I am saddened by the fact that while I was able to get better, I left you behind. You had to deal with everything on your own. All because I couldn't deal with another death..." Genji trailed off, eyes getting misty. Ever since he was able to let go of his anger, he had been able to feel more emotions other than emotional distance and fury. Sadness affected him more profoundly. This was no exception. He assumed once he was whole once again, he would establish a healthier grasp on his emotion.
Jesse sighed, blowing out some smoke. "Ya don't have to worry 'bout me, Genji. I... well, I've managed so far." It spunded weak to both of their ears as Genji let out a humorless snort.
"Don't believe I did not notice your bounty has nearly tripled, cowboy. I would say that isn't dealing well." Jesse conceeded the point, giving a bit of a grimace. He had thought Genji wouldn't have found out.
"Look at the both of us," Jesse said bitterly, gritting his teeth and looking at his hands. "You've gotten better and it seems I have just gotten worse... what would he think?"
"He'd be proud of us. He'd be proud of you. Jesse, it's okay; you can say his name. I feel like Gabriel would be more offended that his name hasn't been said in this whole conversation." Jesse smiled humorlessly. The mood was heavy but Genji knew it had to get there.
"I'm too sober for this." Jesse said, pulling a bottle of aguardiente from his bag on the floor. He took a swing then passed it to Genji. Genji agreed. They needed this. The alcohol burned down his throat. A brief little comfort he will indulge himself in.
"We need to talk about it, Jesse. We can't just put it off. It's been five years, nearly six. In good conscience, I cannot allow you to self-destruct as I once did five ywars ago. You- we deserve this. We deserve a break. We deserve happiness. Gabriel would agree with it." Genji said, voice slightly hoarse from emotions and the alcohol. Jesse sighed, and put his head in his hands. Genji layed a hand on his shoulder, comforting.
"We left him to die, Genji. We abandoned the man that protected us. Sure, not by any choice of ours or really either his, but hell if he didn't make up for it and more. We just let him get so bad that... everything went to shit," Jesse let out a wet laugh, a slight trembling to his frame. "I thought we had already suffered enough. But this fucking universe had to take the small family we had and just kill it as well."
Genji agreed. Too much had happened. They were older now. But aged much beyond their years. Genji felt like a millenia had passed since he was attacked and now. He imagined Jesse felt the same. Genji, morbidly, found their situation humorous and started laughing.
"Look at us. We're both messes in our own right. Gabriel would have beat us for being such a pitiful sight." Genji laughed, knowing it were not true. Gabriel would have tried to help. Under his gruff exterior, he was truly a soft man who cared too much. Genji personally thinks that was his downfall. Jesse joined in, a quiet, wheezy sort of laugh. They stayed quiet, sharing their bottle of alcohol.
"If I find her, I'm going to kill that bitch." Jesse exhaled, the words mingling with the smoke leaving his mouth. Genji didn't need to know who. He felt the same. Jesse knew that. Genji still needed to reassure him.
"I will be beside you to the end of the line, Jesse McCree."
It was the least he could do. For their own resolution.