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They say, “You learn something new every day.” Sometimes, it’s something genuinely useful. Other times, it’s something you could’ve gone your entire life without knowing. To Edd, what Matt just told him was definitely the latter.
“Hey, guys!” Matt abruptly said, looking up from his phone to be greeted with the other three looking at him with a questioning gaze. “Did you know it’s national kiss a ginger day?”
“It’s what ?” Edd asked, half in confusion, half in disbelief.
“Didn’t you hear me? I said it was national kiss a ginger day!” Matt repeated.
“There’s a day for that?” Tom questioned.
“Apparently so!” Matt turned his phone off and pocketed it. “It said you were supposed to kiss the nearest ginger.”
“Since when did you read?” Tom teased with a smirk, making Edd chuckle softly.
“Or, are you making this up to get us to kiss you or some gay shit like that?” Edd added, knowing full well that that is definitely something Matt would do.
“I’m not making it up just to get a kiss from you guys! Why would I
want
you to kiss me?” Matt huffed. “Look it up, it exists!”
“I’m not looking up something that pointless,” Edd replied.
“Then you can’t call me a liar!”
“Ugh…fine. Whatever.” Edd rolled his eyes and pulled out his phone. He was stubborn, but Matt was also talkative. If he didn’t look it up, his friend wouldn’t shut up about it until they all died. Also, he sincerely hoped that whatever Matt was talking about was fake, so he could make fun of him for being desperate(not that he doesn’t already do that). Edd typed “national kiss a ginger day” into his search bar and hit enter. He was surprised to see that he actually got results. The first of the aforementioned results said, “ KISS A GINGER DAY. On January 12, everyone is encouraged to find your favorite redhead and give them a peck on Kiss a Ginger Day.”
“So?” Matt prompted with a smug smirk.
“You’re fuckin’ kidding me,” Edd mumbled. Tord and Tom, who were both sitting next to Edd, leaned over to look at his phone screen.
“So...it is real?” Tord asked quietly.
“Guess so.” Edd turned his phone off. “That’s fuckin’ bullshit. Is there a national day for
everything
?”
“Basically,” Tom answered.
“That’s stupid,” Edd grumbled. “Well, what’s the point in telling us? D’ya want us to all kiss you or something? Cause that’s pretty gay.”
“First of all Edd, you’re gay. Second of all, I don’t
want
you to kiss me! You guys probably wanna kiss me, anyway.”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” Tom rolled his eyes, though it wasn’t visible since his eyes were black. However, you could
hear
the eyeroll in his tone. “No one wants to kiss you.”
“Yeah, we’d probably get a disease,” Edd joked.
“At least I shower every day. I’m clean,” Matt countered. “Anyway, I’m not saying you have to. The day just encourages you to.”
“Well, I’m not,” Edd said.
“Yeah, me neither,” Tom agreed.
“I am not going to, either,” Tord spoke up.
“Well, fine!” Matt let out a soft huff and pulled his phone back out. He couldn’t believe they were passing up such a rare opportunity! Sure, he wouldn’t have let them kiss him on the lips, but he would have allowed a peck on the cheek! There were people that would probably kill for that opportunity! As Matt grumbled to himself, Edd could tell that the other was clearly disappointed with their replies.
“Ya seem a little annoyed,” Edd commented with a smirk. “Were you actually expecting us to kiss you?”
“Well, who wouldn’t want to kiss me?” Matt looked up. “I’m amazing!”
“Nobody wants to kiss you,” Tom sharply stated.
“Stop projecting, Tom,” Matt replied.
“I’m not!”
“Aaaaaaanyway,” Edd cut in. “If we all did kiss you, would you shut up and stop being a bitch for the rest of the day?”
“Maybe.” Matt chuckled. “Why, are you considering it?”
“Maybe,” Edd answered in a mocking tone. “If it gets you to shut up for a day, then it sounds pretty worth it.”
“Okay. Then, if you guys all kiss me, I’ll shut up for the rest of the day.” Matt’s gaze swept over the three with a smirk. Really, he just wanted to see if they’d actually go through with it. They couldn’t want him to be quiet that much, could they?
“Okay. Fine,” Edd replied, making Matt’s eyes widen.
“What the hell? What do you mean?” He asked in surprise.
“Yeah, what?!” Tom broke in to the conversation. Tord sighed and crossed his arms, silently wondering why he always had to get dragged into this. “You can’t be serious, Edd!”
“I mean, it’d get Matt to shut up, wouldn’t it?” Edd shrugged. “Knowing him, we probably don’t even have to kiss him on the lips, anyway. Since he’s
too good
for that,” he said with sharp sarcasm.
“I mean, I guess, but…” Tom grumbled. “Why did you have to drag me into it?”
“Because if I have to do it, then you have to too.”
“I fucking hate you.”
“Yep.” Edd chuckled. Matt was watching them talk with wide eyes. Wow, they really wanted him to shut up
that
badly, huh? Well, at least they had to kiss him to make that happen.
“Well...okay, I guess!” Matt laughed softly. “You can kiss me anywhere except on the lips.”
“Told ya.” Edd stood up and walked over to Matt. “Might as well go first to get it out of the way.” However, rather than just leaning down and pecking Matt on the cheek, his balled his hand up into a fist and kissed it. After doing that, he socked Matt in the arm. It wasn’t too hard, but it would definitely sting. Matt hissed in pain and rubbed his shoulder.
“Ow!” He punched Edd back in the side, but his friend simply started to laugh. “You’re a prick, but I’ll take it. At least one person has to actually kiss me, though!”
“Well, ‘s not gonna be me,” Tom stated as he stood up. Instead of kissing his fist like Edd did, he kissed four fingers and jabbed Matt in the other shoulder.
“Ow! Fuck!” Matt growled and jabbed Tom back in the abdomen. Rather than laughing, the other yelped in pain and staggered back. Tord snickered, enjoying the sight of Tom getting hurt. He looked at Matt to see the other staring right back at him. “Tord, if you hurt me, I swear to god I am throwing you out the window,” he threatened.
“Yeah, yeah…” Tord muttered, standing up and walking over to Matt, whom was still rubbing his shoulders to ease the pain. Not wanting to break the wall or his body, he opted to merely lean down and peck the other on the head. Tord’s lips tingled from Matt’s soft hair, but the feeling only lasted for a few moments. He quickly pulled away, his cheeks dusted red. Matt hummed softly. Honestly, it was quite surprising to see Tord be so gentle. It made his face heat up a bit when he thought about it. He expected another punch, but this was a lot better.
“Hah, gaaaaaay!” Edd yelled. Tom started to snicker, and Edd joined in with him.
“Shut the fuck up!” Tord yelled at them, his face flushing an even deeper red. Matt laughed a bit, looking down into his lap.
“Well, looks like you have to shut up for the day,” Edd told Matt after calming down from his laughing fit.
“Yeah...I guess so…” Matt sighed, a small smile still on his face. Even if he had to be quiet now, it was absolutely worth it.
