Chapter Text
“Alright children, we have another disappointment to add to the class. Zim, introduce yourself and sit down. Or don’t; I couldn’t care less either way.” The teacher, Miss Bitters, said as she slithered back to her desk. The glare she sent Zim as he opened his mouth told him to keep his introduction as short as possible.
“Hello, fellow students! My name is Zim Takahashi and I just moved here!” Zim shouted, a wide grin on his face. His new classmates winced at the volume before mumbling out a ‘welcome to the class’. He turned back to Miss Bitters who shot him another glare and pointed to the empty desk near the door. As soon as he was seated she turned back to the class and began her lecture on space and the universe; and why exploring it was pointless because, eventually the sun would implode on itself and erase any progress made.
“Okay, am I the only one who sees the alien sitting in class?”
Zim turned to the boy who had spoken, his eyes were wide as he frantically looked around the classroom for support. Zim silently pointed to himself, “Yes, you! I know what an alien looks like when I see one; and that right there is an alien!” The boy stood up angrily, “Look at his horrible green skin! Is that normal? And he has purple eyes! Do normal people have purple eyes and green skin?”
The class started to murmur to each other, before the girl behind Zim muttered to him that Dib does this to every new kid, and it was super annoying. It was also the reason they don’t get many new students. “You’re crazy. Only babies believe in aliens or Bigfoot or vampire bees, Dib.” She rolled her eyes at the angry sound Dib made before going back to doodling in her notebook.
“Okay, I may have been wrong about the football team being mind controlled by a coven of witches, but I did see Bigfoot! He was using the beltsander and it was too dark to take a good picture but I saw what I saw!” Dib shouted before he turned back to Zim, “I mean, just look at him! He’s green! Kids aren’t green, aliens are!”
Zim could feel himself losing what little self control he had; he’d been in class for thirty minutes and half of it was being called an alien by some kid who didn’t know how to shut up. “Hey stupid! It’s a skin condition and I was born with purple eyes!” Zim shouted from his desk. He wanted to get up and deck the kid in the face but he promised his mom not to cause her trouble and being pulled into the principal’s office for assault was definitely trouble.
Miss Bitters chose that moment to cut in, “Alright, now that Zim here has grown a backbone and fought off Dib we can move on. Dib, I appreciate you trying to thin the class but crushing dreams is my job, save it for recess. Zim, it looks like you won’t be going to the underground classrooms, please enjoy the torment of your peers for the next eight months.” She hissed a quick warning at Dib for getting out of his seat before returning to her lecture on space.
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At the end of school, after an uncomfortably long stare down between him and Dib at recess, Zim wandered toward the principal’s office. He needed to turn in his service dog papers by the end of the week if he wanted Gir to be approved. Maybe having his dog with him would keep the kids from staring at him; maybe it wouldn’t. It doesn’t matter, once the other children saw Zim for what he was, a magnificent and awe inspiring genius, they would have no choice but to ignore his body’s flaws.
“You won’t get away with this, Zim.” A voice spoke from behind him. Zim wondered if ‘Dibs’ were normal for at public schools, and if he could get a refund on his, maybe get one on this whole experience. He shook his head, remembering how he had begged his mother for the chance to get away from Irk Academy. Well, he’d just have to stick it out, and if the Dib wanted to fight him then Zim would have to show him what happens when wispy big heads like him fight an Irken Academy Invader.
Zim turned to face his classmate, “I won’t get away with what, Dib?” This was getting annoying, and each time the Dib showed his face Zim could feel himself getting closer and closer to jumping him. “I won’t get away with my evil plans of getting these papers signed?”
“You may have everybody else fooled, but not me!” Dib huffed out, he crossed his arms over his chest before moving closer to Zim, trying to loom over him when they were almost the same height, “I’m going to prove to the world that aliens are real, and you’re one of them!” He jabbed his finger into Zim’s chest as if to emphasize how right he was.
Zim opened his mouth to tell him he was not, under any circumstances, an alien, when a thought hit him. Dib would never give up on him being an alien; he had that crazy look in his eyes that reminded him of the employees his mother fired or when she ran a rival company out of business.
Well, Zim thought, why not?
A sly grin slid across Zim’s face, “No one will believe you.” Dib’s eyes widened and Zim allowed himself to laugh at his stupid face, before opening the door to the principal’s office. He told the middle aged woman with a dead stare why he was here, and was given a chalky piece of candy in return. The principal called him in to her office where he explained his disgusting defects to her and why he needed Gir in school incase he felt too dizzy to stand or something equally pathetic. He also explained that his dog was green and that it was definitely the breeders fault but they loved him anyway. The principal smiled as she filed the papers away and told him they should be finished processing by six, so he was fine to bring in Gir tomorrow.
Dib was still standing outside the office, with his big mouth hanging open, when Zim exited the room with yet another piece of underwhelming candy. “There’s nothing you can do to stop me, ugly pig-monkey!” Zim sneered at Dib as he walked past.
This was going to be fun.