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Batman did not know how it had happened, but he was willing to bet it was Green Arrow and Superman’s fault. Possibly even Wonder Women. However, it had happened the Justice League was sitting on the floor of the Watchtower’s conference room playing Never Have I Ever, and Batman wanted to break someone’s face. Possibly Green Lantern or Aquaman’s faces, they were the ones who had insisted that if they were doing this, they needed to be sitting on the floor.
He was not sure how Superman had talked him into this, something about team bonding and trust-building exercise. Still, he had, and now Batman was sitting in between Black Canary and the Flash, a mediocre drink in hand. The quality of the drink was Green Arrows' fault. How a man that rich could drink alcohol this bad on purpose was incomprehensible.
The League had asked Shazam to play with them, but the man, kid really, had said something about work obligation and had declined. Batman made a mental note to check on his situation. Alfred might joke that the only reason he hadn’t adopted Billy Batson already was that Billy had a family, but Batman was unbothered. He would make sure the kid and his family would be alright. Besides, Bruce had already started an organization whose sole focus was helping out foster parents financially and helping them expand into Fawcett City had been easy.
Several other members currently on earth are here and in different states of inebriation. Batman holds back a sigh as Zatanna drains her glass and grabs the nearest bottle of alcohol to fill it up again. The game hadn’t even started yet.
“Okay, let’s start,” Superman says and takes a sip of his drink. One of the reasons Superman had been so intent on this was because Green Lantern had gotten ahold of a bottle of alcohol he claimed could get even Superman and the Flash drunk, and so far, he had been proven right. “Never have I ever skipped school.”
“Oh, come on, that's just boring.” Green Arrow says, but he does take a shot and grins at Superman. “Never have I ever had a threesome! Now that's how you do this game, right.”
Lantern’s eyes almost pop out of his head when Batman takes a shot, and Arrow falls over in surprise, but since he falls right into Black Canaries' lap, it's maybe not that much of an accident. “What the fuck, Batman?”
The other members of the league look at him in shock, except Zatanna. They have known each other since they were fifteen, and nothing Batman could ever do will shock her.
“I don't need that picture in my head.” Green Lantern complains, but his ears are red. Batman does not look at him and tries to keep his embarrassment at bay. He can see Aquaman grinning at him and Wonder Woman takes a shot, but no one pays her any attention except Superman, who goes as red as his cape.
All eyes are on Batman, who says nothing. This was a bad idea. No one but Superman and Zatanna is aware of his civilian identity, and this was not how he wanted his actions outside the cowl to known to the rest of the League.
Batman turns his head to look at the next person in line for the questions, and Wonder Woman grins and takes mercy on him. “Never have I ever broken almost every bone in my body.” She takes a shot, and so does Green Lantern and Aquaman. With a slight grimace, Batman follows suit.
The next couple of questions are of the same nature until Zatanna. The way she grins at Batman makes him narrow his eyes at her.
“Never have I ever received and/or given oral sex in a limo.” The way Zatanna stares Batman down as she takes a shot makes the rest of the league pause, and when Batman takes a shot as well, there is dead silence in the room.
“Okay.” Green Arrows says. “What the fuck?”
Flash looks between the two. “Did you two….?” He trails off when Zatanna starts laughing.
“No.” Batman bites out when she won’t stop laughing.
“Then how does she know?” Black Canary asks, and Batman wants to sink through the floor and disappear. Zatanna gets herself under control and winks at Black Canary.
“We have known each other since we were both in diapers.” She explains. It's an exaggeration, but sometimes it feels like the truth. “And Batman was not always as discreet as he is now.”
“That’s just wrong,” Aquaman says. “Baby Batman.” He explains at their looks and grins. They all laugh, and Batman lets out a breath when the conversation moves on. The questions go for another couple of rounds, and all the questions stay vanilla until Arrow starts picking on Lantern, and he retaliates.
“Never have I ever sleep with someone in the League.” Lantern grins at Arrow, and he groans, but both he and Canary takes a shot.
“Wait, hold up,” Zatanna says when they’re all done laughing. She points at Batman. He knew this was coming, but still, why must she be like this. “Why aren’t you taking a shot?”
There’s some spluttering, then everyone turns to looks at Superman and Wonder Woman.
“Whoa.” Superman protests, but he's laughing. “Why are you all looking at me?”
“Well.” Flash starts. “You and Batman do seem close, and I mean-” He looks around the room. “Who else?”
“No. I haven't slept with Batman.” Superman says. He looks at Wonder Woman, who shakes her head.
“I have also never slept with Batman.” But Diana is still looking at Zatanna. “You know who?”
Zatanna looks thoughtful, but she nods in agreement. “I know.” Then she brightens and points right at Batman. “Ohh, you sneaky bastard. You technically haven't slept with anyone in the League.”
Batman keeps his mouth shut. Nothing good will come out of arguing with her, but Zatanna doesn’t stop. Zatanna has never known the meaning of the word moderation and always goes for the kill, metaphorically. “You slept with them before they become a League member!”
Flash picks it up the fastest, and he turns to look at Batman. “Never have I ever slept with anyone in this room.” Arrow and Canary take a shot, but all eyes are on Batman.
Batman takes a discreet look around, but running will not help his cause. So he takes a shot instead while glaring at Zatanna.
“Oh my God.” Lantern almost shrikes. “Who?”
“That is not an appropriate question,” Batman argues. He knows it is useless, but when Lantern opens his mouth to argue, Canary speaks up.
“No, he is right.” Batman has half a second of relief before she looks at him. “Never have I ever slept with Wonder Women.”
Batman closes his eyes in defeat, but he has never slept with Diana, so he doesn't take a shot.
Arrow cackles and leans forward to ask the next question. “Never have I ever slept with-”
“It’s not your turn.” Batman bites out and turns to look at him and Canary. “It’s mine.”
“Please continue.” Lantern makes an expansive gesture in Batman’s direction, and it should not be as charming as it is. Batman carefully tucks that thought away and looks at Superman to avoid Lantern’s blinding smile.
“Never have I ever used x-ray vision to look through someone's clothes.” Superman chokes on-air and sputters while the rest of the League goes wide-eyed.
“What!?” The outrage and disbelief are thick in the air.
“I never have.” Superman starts and then levels a finger at him when Batman tilts his head in disbelief. “That doesn’t count!”
“Superman!” Wonder Woman demands. “What did you do?”
“I- It-.” Superman tries, but he can’t find the words. Batman doesn’t grin, but he catches Lantern’s eyes, and he can’t stop his lips from twitching. Lantern raises an eyebrow, looks around the room that has lost all interest in Batman's love life, and then tips his drink at him in acknowledgment of his achievement. Lantern tips his head back to empty his drink, and Batman follows the motion with his eyes. The distraction with Superman won’t last long, but it gives him some breathing room.
“I don't use my x-ray vision to look at people without their consent!” Superman has buried his face in his hands, and his ears are bright red.
“That’s a lie.” Batman murmurs, but he is still loud enough to be heard by the League.
“You are not helping.” Superman looks up to glare at him. Batman shrugs. He is not trying to be helpful.
Canary leans back on her hands and studies him. “Explain.” It is not a request.
“I used my x-ray vision to look under Batman’s cowl.” Superman sounds miserable.
“There is a reason I have lead lining my cawl now,” Batman confirmed when several League members looked at him.
“You are dressed as a Bat, and you were hanging around my city!” Superman counters.
“You looked under his cowl?” Aquaman asks. “That not cool, man.”
“Excuse me for being nervous! I had never met another superhero before.” Is Superman’s response.
“You’re bulletproof. What did you think he was going to do?” Wonder Woman asks. She has crossed her arm, and she is trying to hide her amusement.
“I didn't know!” Superman puts his hands back in his hands.
“Didn't know what?” Flash asks, but Superman is mumbling into his hands so the answer it’s not heard.
Batman snorts and translates for the rest of them. “He didn't know he was bulletproof. We found that out later.”
There is a pause, then Lantern snorts and starts laughing. “That’s got to be a good story.”
“It is.” Batman agrees and meets Lantern’s eyes or as well as he can with the lenses down on both of their masks, and Batman regrets for a moment that he can't see his eyes.
They grin at each other for a second longer before Batman turns back to hear Superman continue his explanation.
“I don’t use my x-ray vision to look at naked people. I use it to look after broken bones or bombs, or under rubble.” Superman drags his hands down his face to glare at Batman. “At least I don’t plant a tracking device on someone to follow them home.”
Batman just looks at him. “You started it.”
There is a rumble of laughter, and then everyone turns back to their drinks and the almost forgotten game.
“Wait.” Flash looks at Batman. “If you know Superman’s identity and you know who in the League you have and have not slept with, do you know everyone’s secret identity?”
Batman nods and holds up a hand for a chance to explain. “You know the reason for me knowing Superman's.” He looks around at them, and they nod in agreement. ”Wonder Woman and Aquaman don’t have a civilian identity.” Aquaman grimaces but nods in agreement, and Wonder Woman only smiles. She set up a Themysciran embassy in a park. She has never tried to keep her identity a secret.
“I know Flash’s because-” Batman hesitates than grimaces, he has accepted that this will probably lead to him telling them his identity, but Batman is okay with that. He looks at the Flash. “First time we meet was in our civilian identity, and then you were hit by lightning.” He lets the statement hang between them. “I got a hold of your medical records to see if there was anything I could do to help, and right after you woke up, there is a new superhero in town?” Batman looks around the room. “You don’t have to be a genius to figure that one out.”
“Okay, that makes sense.” Aquaman agrees. “And you already knew Zatanna. But the others?” He looks at Lantern, Canary, and Arrow.
Batman takes a deep breath and looks at them. “None of you change the way you speak or walk when you put on the mask.” He shrugs. “I met you all first out of the cape and recognized you afterward.”
“Okay, time out,” Lantern says, and he makes a T with his hands. “I have met your civilian identity?”
“It was a long time ago, Lantern,” Batman says. “Almost 5 years ago.”
Lantern’s eyebrows go up. “I wasn't a Green Lantern back then.”
“No, you weren’t.” Batman agrees. “But I was Batman.” Bruce takes a sip of his drink, and he can see Canary giving him a shrewd look out of the corner of his eye. Fuck.
“I believe it's my turn in never have I ever?” When they all agree. She turns to look at Batman. “Never have I ever slept with Green Arrow.”
Bruce sighs. He and Black Canary both downs their shots at the same time. There is laughter all around, and Batman glances at Lantern. He is grinning, but he is a little stilted.
“When?!” Green Arrow demands. Canary is sitting cross-legged on the floor between them, but Arrow is leaning over her lap, almost in Batman’s face. “When the hell did I have sex with you?”
Bruce grins and leans forward. The alcohol might be hitting his system harder than he thought, but who gives a shit. He trusts these people with his life and his kids’ lives. Probably even his secrets.
“Arrow, you don't remember me? I’m hurt.” Bruce might be channeling Brucie Wayne, but he is about to out his identity to this man. He might as well make it fun. He can hear someone choking on their tongue, but he doesn’t turn away from Arrow’s rapidly reddening face. “I'm pretty sure I was your first.”
“My first what?” Arrow asks a little hoarsely. He clears his throat and continues. “You are gonna have to be a little more specific. I’ve had a lot of first.”
Bruce hums in agreement. “First time you kissed a boy, the first handjob, first blow job, the first time you had sex, the first time your mom caught you-”
Oliver's face is now chalk white. “Oh my God…” It looks like someone has hit him over the back of the head. “I had an orgy with Batman.”
There’s a moment of stunned silence, and then Aquaman roars with laughter. Bruce grins and sits back up straight. He takes a sip of his drink and looks around the room. Aquaman is lying on his back, howling with laughter, and every time he looks at Arrow’s shocked face, he starts up again. Wonder Woman is amused, and Superman has his face in his hands, Bruce can barely see his red ears. Superman is not a prude, but hearing that your best friend was a part of an orgy with one of your teammates is a step too far for him. Flash is trying and failing to hide his laughter, and Lantern is blushing.
Black Canary tries to calm Arrow down by stroking his hair, but when he rolls over with a groan and lands on his back to hides his face in his hands, she cracks and starts laughing.
“I don't know what you’re laughing about.” Arrow looks out from between his fingers at her. “You have slept with him too.”
She stops laughing and blinks down at Oliver. “What?”
“Yeah.” Oliver grins at her. “About half a year ago? You had that court case in Gotham, and when you came back home, you would not stop talking about it.”
Canary turns to look at Bruce and frowns. “That can’t be right.”
Bruce grimaces. ”I thought Black Canary was your sister, but when you almost ruptured my eardrums, I realized my mistake.”
“Ruptured eardrums?” Aquaman asks with a grin.
“I almost lost my hearing afterward. The only reason I didn’t start bleeding was that I had her thighs wrapped around my head,” Bruce explains, then mentally winces, that might have been more info then Dinah wanted to share, but when he looks at her, Dinah is grinning in delight. Bruce eyes his glass, he might have had more to drink than he realized, or he grabbed Flash’s glass by accident.
“That was you?” Dinah is almost bouncing in her seat.
“Yes.” Bruce hops he is not blushing, but if the way her grin deepens, he is.
“Alright, let's keep this party going.” Lantern smiles, but it's a little stiff around the edges. “I believe it's Arrows turn next.”
“Yes, please,” Clark begs and looks up from his hands. “Can we please stop discussing my best friend's sex life?”
“I don't know, I find this kinda fascinating,” Diana confesses. “To think that Batman is a smooth talker is…” She gestures in the air. “Well. it’s kind of funny.”
“Oh, he is not,” Zatanna says with glee. “B is just very good at faking it. Batman is much closer to who he is than the “mask” he puts on when he is in public.” Bruce glares at her but doesn’t correct her. Zatanna is right. Of course, the mask of Brucie Wayne is a necessary evil.
“You say that like he’s a public figure?” Flash looks contemplative.
“About the same kind of public figure as Arrow.” Zatanna agrees. She might not know Flash’s identity, but she knows Arrow and Zatanna have heard them talk about weekends spent hanging out before.
“You said we meet, yes?” Flash eyes, Batman.
“We did.” Bruce agrees. He watches Flash go through the evidence and suppresses the urge the smile. Barry Allen was one hell of an investigator even before he got the Speed Force, and with the added speed, he had only become better.
It takes all of five seconds before his eyes widen, and he gaps at Bruce. “Holy shit, you're Batman.” He then looks wide-eyed at Green Lantern before he smooths his expression into something more neutral. That was strange but not completely unexpected considering the circumstances.
Bruce looks up at Lantern and finds that he is already studying him. Bruce holds his gaze then looks at Arrow. This can escalate very quickly, and the alcohol does not help Bruce focus on why Lantern knows his identity is a bad idea.
Arrow is still hiding his face, and he kicks at Lantern's foot. “I can’t concentrate, so let's just skip me this time, your turn, Lantern.”
“Lightweight.” Aquaman mocks and takes a sip of his drinks. He is sitting upright, but his hair is a mess, and it makes Bruce’s lips twitch. Dick had looked about the same when he got up in the morning during his time as “discowing”.
Lantern takes his time, and Bruce looks back at him, they are sitting almost directly opposite each other, and Hal tips his head to study Bruce.
“Never have I ever slept with a Green Lantern.” Hal challenges even as he takes a shot himself. Bruce swallows and reaches for his drink.
“Are you kidding me!?” Aquaman yells as the rest of the League groans. “Never have I ever had sex with half the League!” He falls backward to sprawl all over the floor.
Bruce takes another shot. He has technically not slept with half the League, but if Arthur is gonna be an asshole about it, so can Bruce. Zatanna falls over in laughter, and Clark is either sobbing or laughing into a grinning Diana’s shoulder. Barry drains his cup and looks to be half asleep when he lays back down on the floor. Apparently, the alcohol Lantern had provided could get Superman and the Flash drunk.
There is a shuffle, and when Bruce looks at Lantern, he is standing up and holding out a hand for Bruce. He considers for a moment then takes it, better to get this over with sooner than later.
They leave the rest of the League in the conference room and, by mutual agreement, heads towards the sleeping quarters.
“Yours or mine?” Lantern asks, and Bruce takes a second to think.
“Yours.” It would allow him to leave if he wanted to. Lantern huffs, so he must recognize the strategy. After another couple of minutes of silence and Lantern opens the doors to his room and enters. Bruce hesitates then follows, and the doors swish closed behind him. Green Lantern and Batman study each other a second, then Bruce reaches up and removes his cowl. There is no point with it anymore. Lantern knows who he is.
Lantern draws in a sharp breath, and then he lets his mask disappear. Bruce had almost forgotten how pretty Hal’s eyes are.
“So.” Hal starts, and he is smiling slightly. “I have fucked Batman.”
Bruce snorts and runs a hand through his hair. “Yeah.”
“You’re still goddamn pretty.” Hal breathes. He then bites his lip and studies Bruce’s face. “Did you break up with me because I become a Green Lantern?”
Bruce closes his eyes and lets out a deep breath. This was why he didn't want Hal to know his identity. “No.” He opens his eyes and meets Hal’s eyes. “And yes.”
Hal crosses his arms and raises his eyebrows.
“When you disappeared, I went looking for you.” Not that Bruce had found much, but what he had pieced together had been perplexing. He had gone to Superman, and luckily the Fortress of Solitude had records of the Lantern Corps. Bruce had spent weeks going back and forth with himself. If Hal was now a hero, should he tell him about Batman? Hal is frowning, but he doesn't ask. He has seen Batman on a case before. He knows what he can do how obsessed he can be. “You being a Green Lantern wasn’t a deal-breaker, but then Jason was murdered-.”
“Wait, murdered?” Hal steps forward. Bruce can see the wheels turning in his head, but he doesn’t interrupt. Jason and Hal had gotten along like a house on fire the few times they had met, and Jason had been all for the relationship. After returning as the Red Hood and started wearing the bat symbol again, he asked what happened with Hal and why they were no longer together. Jason had not been impressed with the answer or lack thereof.
“The second Robin.” It's not a question, but Bruce nods and then hesitates. Hal must catch the pause because he steps into Bruce’s space. “What?” It's almost a growl.
“Jason didn’t stay dead.” Bruce can't look Hal in the eyes, so he focuses his eyes over Hal’s shoulder. What happened to Jason was his fault, but what Jason is doing now is his own decisions. Bruce squashes the voice that whispers that if Batman wanted to stop him, he could track Jason down and bring him in to face justice. “He goes by Red Hood now.”
“The mob boss?” Hal sounds unconvinced, and Bruce’s lips twitch. Jason has always been tall, but he was skinny, and the last time Hal had seen him was before the growth spurt. To imagine the little kid turning into the mountain of a man Jason was now was not easy.
“He prefers vigilante.” When there is no answer, Bruce focuses on Hal’s face again and sees that Hal has put a hand over his eyes and rubs at his temples, but he is grinning.
“Your life, B, is ridiculous.” Hal lets his hand drop, and they look at each other. Bruce is honest enough with himself to admit he gets a little lost in Hal’s eyes, so when Hal steps back to sit on the bed, Bruce spends a second blinking, trying to gather his thoughts. He must have accidentally drunk some of the alcohol meant for Superman because Bruce is feeling light-headed, hot all over, and he can't quite seem to catch his breath. When Hal starts speaking again, Bruce focuses back on his lips, a bad idea.
“I didn’t catch that.” Bruce blinks, and Hal just grins at him. Hal leans back on his elbows and lets his legs fall open in clear invitation, Bruce feels all his blood rush south, and he, by sheer force of will, keeps his eyes on Hal’s face.
“You were explaining why you broke up with me.” Hal is not as drunk as Bruce, and that is just unfair.
“After Jason, I- I change, I pushed everyone away.” Bruce frowns and tries to remember his train of thought. “When you returned to earth, I couldn't deal with” He gestures at Hal, at the uniform he is wearing, unable to find the right words, but the look on Hal’s face it’s not understanding, but somewhere in that range of emotion. “But I couldn't ask you to give the ring up either, so I made a choice.”
“You made a choice,” Hal repeats back at him. Bruce doesn't grimace but is close. Hal continues. “I was gonna tell you about the Lantern Corps that day I called you to ask you to meet me.”
“I know,” Bruce confesses. Hal had been so happy on the phone, and Bruce had been so glad to hear his voice, to know that he was back on earth and that he was safe, but Bruce had made a decision, and he was sticking to it.
Bruce had done the cruelest thing he could think of, and he had faked indifference, pretended that he had not noticed that Hal had been missing for months.
Hal, I hadn't noticed, it's not like we are dating. Even after all these years, Bruce still remembers the word he used and the silence that had followed. My mistake then . Had been the last words he heard from Hal for a week. Then Hal had tried calling again, but Bruce had not picked up, and the call had gone to voicemail. Listening to Hal cry over the phone and apologizing for not being there when Jason died had been…
Bruce swallows and focuses on the present. On Hal here and now, on the second chance, Hal is offering. To try again.
“I was going to tell you about Batman.” Bruce settles on.
“Were you?” Hal lifts a skeptical eyebrow.
“Yes, before Jason died, I was going to tell you.” Hal must read the truth in his face because he groans and falls back on the bed to sprawl out. Bruce’s eyes linger on the spread of Hal’s things and the line of his chest. He remembers how it feels, being pressed into the bed and having Hal’s hands on him. Misses it. They had only been together for six months, and even then, they had been in different cities, but six months of phone calls and weekends spent together when they had the time, and it had been good. Not perfect, but it had been the closest Bruce had ever gotten.
Bruce drags his eyes back up to Hal’s face and finds him already watching him.
“Come to bed.” Hal rasps, and Bruce shakes his head.
“Not a good idea.” He counters.
Hal laughs, gets back to his feet, and let the Lantern uniform go. Underneath he is wearing jeans and a t-shirt, no shoes. “Alright then, just to sleep. Or don't you trust me to keep my hands to myself?”
Bruce huffs but keeps his eyes on Hal. “It’s not your self-control I’m worried about, Hal.”
But Hal isn’t listening. He has turned his back to Bruce and has his t-shirt halfway off already. Bruce catalogs the new scars and the new muscle mass Hal has developed over the years. He licks his lips, reaches forward to touch one scar running down the length of Hals’s spine, starting at his shoulder blade. Hal stops moving to looks over his shoulder at him, and Bruce presses his hand down on the scar, then lets his hand trail down Hal’s side to his hip and pulls him back into Bruce’s chest.
Hal grins at him reaches a hand back to grab Bruce’s ass. “Hello to you too,” Hal murmurs before leaning in to claim Bruce’s lips.
The angel makes it a little awkward, but Bruce twists slightly to the side, and then it’s better than good. It’s been years, but Bruce still remembers how to kiss Hal to make him gasp. How to pull his hair to make him arch his back and make Hal moan, but it’s a two-way street, so Hal has the same knowledge.
Hal pulls away to gasp for breath, and Bruce leans down to lick his collarbone. He finds the spot that makes Hal’s knees weak and bites down.
“Off, you need to get that armor off,” Hal complains, and Brue only hums in agreement, but he is sucking a hickey under Hal’s jaw and can't be bothered to move.
After a couple of seconds of struggle, Hal frees himself from Bruce’s arms and levels a threatening finger at him, but he is grinning at Bruce. “No, take that suit off, and then you get to touch.” He takes a couple of more steps away from Bruce, just to be on the safe side, then puts a hand to his neck. “I had almost forgotten how much of a vampire you can be.”
Bruce looks at the man in front of him and smiles. Hal’s hair is a mess. Bruce can see the marks on his neck turning red and his jeans halfway undone.
“What?” Hal narrows his eyes at him,
“Nothing, just admiring the view.” Bruce purrs and starts removing the armor.
“Yeah, is it any good?” Bruce looks back up at the question and almost swallows his tongue. Hal is back on the bed, sans jeans and underwear, and he is stroking his dick. Bruce takes a second to look and then sheds his armor in record speed.