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“Stop lookin’ down on me with that stupid smile on your face!”
A band snapped tight around Ryuji’s head as a voice thundered from deep within him. The pressure was immense - simultaneously squeezing and pulling, like his brain was being mashed to bits from the effort to contain it all.
The voice spoke of temptation and power, of hoisting a flag in rebellion and standing proud despite scorn and disdain. Of other selves and truths uncovered.
There was a mask.
Pain.
Clarity.
Ryuji rose on shaky feet, finding footing and glaring down at the pitiful man before him with open contempt.
The rough battle cry that rose from within was different somehow. Higher? Ryuji felt lighter on his feet, barely noticing the tight leather and well-worn boots.
As he leapt into action, heavy lead pipe raised aloft, the last thing Ryuji could think was that he had never felt so alive.
----
Akira was acting weird.
His eyes kept glancing over and flitting away again, lit with an emotion Ryuji couldn’t parse. That was probably warranted - they had just given Kamoshithead’s goons the beatdown of a lifetime, and the adrenaline burning through their systems was bound to make it hard to wind down.
“You alright, man?” Ryuji didn’t want to pry, but it was probably time to check in.
His voice sounded lighter than he remembered, but he didn’t think too much of it. He was alight with adrenaline, exhilaration, and fear, and the cocktail pushed away any thoughts of self-consciousness.
Akira went bright red for a moment, but regained enough composure to wave his hands dismissively and give a half-hearted smirk. He gestured them towards the exit of the warped castle and into relative safety.
----
Ryuji settled onto the stone path with a muffled thump, struggling to process the events of the day. He had a persona now. Huh. That was cool.
Mona looked over, then stopped short. “Ryuji, why do you look like a girl?” Mona stifled a laugh as he pointed a paw at Ryuji’s chest.
Wait, what?
Cold panic flashed through him. Ryuji looked down, and was mortified to see what was definitely a modest chest beneath his leather jacket. A strand of long, curly blonde hair brushed his cheek. Fuck, fuck, fuck - after a quick survey of the rest of his body, Ryuji concluded that he did indeed look like a young woman.
And a part of Ryuji liked it.
Nausea crawled up his throat, and he faced ahead, unseeing.
Was this part of the castle’s magic? If it could turn the school gym into a chapel and give Kamoshida a heart-patterned speedo, of course it could turn Ryuji into a girl. Why the hell not. Just his luck.
A lone bluster finally broke through the rush of emotions, lashing out at whatever it could reach. “I don’t know man! You know more about this metaverse bullshit than us, stupid monster cat!” He instantly regretted the venom behind the words and curled tighter around himself, the new curly mane obscuring his face.
Ugh, what the hell had happened?
A while ago, Ryuji had stumbled onto some forums for things like this, and for a while had wondered for entirely too long what it would be like to be a woman. There were fascinating pictures and stories from these beautiful women who had changed genders. For a minute the idea had seemed enticing. However, that was quickly squashed down and replaced with more socially acceptable behavior, and he never thought he would have to think about it again.
But, now that he evaluated the state he was in...it felt kinda nice. Right. Ryuji could feel leather pants hugging convex hips, long hair lightly brushing (his? her? her.) neck.
Mona stretched leisurely and pondered for a moment, suddenly serious. “The metaverse makes cognition into reality, so maybe...this is how you actually see yourself?”
Akira crouched down next to Ryuji, hand rubbing gentle circles into her back through the leather jacket as she slumped further into herself.
“It’s okay.” He whispered.
Ryuji chanced a glance upwards, meeting Akira’s eyes before ducking away again. Her teeth worried at her lower lip, and suddenly the dusty flagstones seemed a hell of a lot more interesting. “I…are you familiar with the term transgender?” Ryuji probed, hardly above a breath. “I’ve questioned before, but I guess this is pretty solid proof, huh?” She laughed, tears in her eyes.
“Is this something you want to think about more? You don’t have to make any decisions right now, but if you want to experiment, I could definitely help you with that.” Akira looked at her thoughtfully for a moment, then added “Even if it’s only in the Metaverse - nobody has to know if you don’t want them to.”
“I - I don’t know.” Ryuji hugged herself tighter and went still for a moment. “I - yes.”
“Ok. How about we start off simple? Do you want me to use she/her for you in the Metaverse?”
Ryuji looked hesitant for a moment, then took the plunge. “That - that would be awesome, man.” She felt tears begin to well in her eyes, and clumsily wiped them away with a hand. Akira pulled her into a gentle hug, and she began sobbing in earnest, leaning into the embrace.
“Fuck man, how long have we known each other? A few days now?” She laughed, wiping more tears away.
“Escaping a magical castle will do that to you, I guess.” Akira chuckled, pulling away from the hug to look her in the eye.
“Is there another name you would like to be called, too?”
“I’ve always loved the name Rin?” She said with a small, watery smile.
“Alright, Rin. Let’s go home, it’s been a long day.” Akira sighed and extended a hand down to her as he rose.
After a moment of hesitation and one more glance down at her new body, Rin took Akira’s hand as the world tilted on its axis.