Work Text:
Previously…
“Well, I was wondering if your lips are sweeter than the icing on this cake, because they sure look like it. Better let me taste first and confirm.” You smile widely as you stare at Lord Diavolo. You’re extremely proud of that one and while you aren’t sure why, you had been saving it for last. You wonder if Lord Diavolo also thought it was as cool as you had. Your smile starts to fade when you feel a pair of warm and soft lips pressed against yours, a sea of gasps (and someone choking-- was that Mammon or Lucifer?) echoing around you.
Oh.
Oh.
You see your mistake now.
🎃🎃🎃
You blinked several times as Diavolo pulled away from you. The future demon king was staring down at you with a tilted head and a smile that was a little too innocent on his lips. You didn’t know what you looked like, but if you had to guess you would say your face resembles Rudolf’s nose.
It was quiet in the ballroom, not a single guest willing to say anything. You’re still staring at Diavolo, you yourself being too nervous to look around at the audience you’re certain you gathered. Lucifer’s probably going to kill you later. Life was nice while it lasted you supposed. “It’s a human tradition.” Lord Diavolo suddenly speaks loud enough for everyone to hear. “In the human realm, they kiss the things they find cute.” His explanation somehow only left you more confused. You glanced behind you to see Simeon and Solomon watching on with an amused expression while Luke was glaring holes into Diavolo’s head. You bring your attention back to the crowned prince. “Like a mother kisses her child, an owner kisses their kitten, or even when a child kisses their stuffed animal!” You feel an eyebrow quirk as Diavolo throws an arm around you. “And I find our precious human exchange student absolutely adorable! So I’m partaking in the human tradition!” You watch as Solomon covers his mouth with his hand in order to keep any laughter at bay. You’re still not entirely sure why he kissed you-- maybe you reminded him of a kitten? You don’t really know and maybe that’s how he intends it.
Within an instant Lucifer is by your side, a hand resting on your shoulder before the demon drags you away from the soon to be Demon King. “Oh, Lucifer,” you look up to catch the red eyed man glaring straight ahead, “fancy seeing you here. Didn’t think I’d run into you tonight.”
“Is that so?” He can barely hold back his sigh. “Even though we arrived together?” A sheepish smile pulls your lips upward as a flush creeps down your neck. “I can’t believe you kissed Lord Diavolo on his birthday.” He seems to have left out the part where it was Diavolo who kissed you. “But he didn’t seem the least bit offended, so hopefully we can just pretend that it never happened.” He glances back at you again. “You really shouldn’t feed Lord Diavolo things about the human realm that aren't true. He’s prone to believe anything a human will tell him.”
A pout replaces the smile on your lips as you allow Lucifer to drag you out into the hall. “I didn’t tell him that! I don’t know where he even got that information from-- and it’s not like he’s entirely wrong. He’s got the right spirit, he’s just confused.” You allow the eldest demon brother to sit you down on an empty bench in the hallway. You assumed he was trying to keep space between you and Lord Diavolo, and it’s not like you blamed him. That stunt probably gave him an extra few gray hairs.
“What did you even say to him to prompt such a reaction?” He’s standing in front of you, arms crossed over his chest as he stares down at you. You shift uneasily as you avoid Lucifer’s intense gaze. He wouldn’t be too happy to know that you had been peppering the future king with pick up lines the last few days. Especially when you knew he was getting less and less tolerant with your antics.
“Ah, well, you see--”
Your gaze is pulled off Lucifer when the doors to the ballroom slam open, an excited Asmodeus nearly mauling Mammon over as he barrels over toward the two of you. “I tried to keep him away from the two of ya, since I figured Lucifer was chewin’ ya out and I wanted no part of that.” The white haired brother says as he bounds after the fifth oldest brother. For once, you hardly minded the interruption from the brothers.
“I cannot believe you got Lord Diavolo to kiss you!” Asmodeus immediately has your hands enveloped in his, the man shoving Lucifer out of the way and dropping to his knees in front of you. “I have been trying for centuries to get that man to kiss me. How did you do it? Did you learn some magic from Solomon or Satan? You need to tell me your secret!” He begs and grips your hands tighter.
“You’ve been trying what?” Lucifer’s glaring at Asmodeus, though the brunet seemingly ignores him.
“I, uh, I don’t know what you want me to say.” You press your back against the bench while trying to put space between the two of you.
“Don’t say anything to him.” Lucifer answers for you, eyes narrowed as he shifts his gaze between the two of you. “And Mammon, you’re not out of this either. You will be punished.” Mammon’s eyes widen as he looks at his older brother. “All three of you.”
“All three of us?” Asmodeus whines and pushes himself away from you, jumping to his feet and turning to look at Lucifer as well. “What did I even do? I wasn’t a part of their plan; if I had been, they would have gotten much more than just a measly peck from Lord Diavolo, don’t you think?”
“The fact that you’ve been trying to kiss Lord Diavolo is a good enough reason to punish you.” There’s a frown on Lucifer’s face before he straightens out his tie. “And you two,” he narrows his sights on you and Mammon, “were definitely scheming something regarding Lord Diavolo. You don’t have to tell me what it was, but you’re both getting punished for it regardless.”
A groan leaves you as you slump against the bench. You should have expected this, in fact, you weren’t sure what you were expecting when Lucifer dragged you out of the ballroom himself. “I hope the kiss was worth it.” Mammon huffs as he plops himself down next to you once Lucifer returns to the ballroom. “Worthy of the punishment we’re about to get.”
“I can’t believe the two of you were up to no good and I somehow got dragged into your mess.” Asmodeus grumbles while sitting on the other side of you. “And all for a peck on the lips. That’s not worthy of the punishment Lucifer’s going to hand down to us. But then again… it’s a peck on the lips from Lord Diavolo.” Asmodeus presses his lips into a line as he thinks it over. You shake your head and bring your attention to your hands that sit on your lap idly. Lucifer was going to kill you and all Asmodeus could think about was kissing Lord Diavolo. On top of that, Mammon would definitely end up giving you the cold shoulder following the punishment. These pick up lines have been more troublesome than good...but they did score you a quick peck with the demon king. Pros and cons.
“So,” Mammon calls your name with an annoyed expression on his face, “have ya realized now that these pick up lines are too much? You should put this game of yours to rest. Besides, you’ve given them to everyone now, that should be good enough, right? No need to continue this.”
“This was your idea to start with!” You reminded the white haired demon and slapped his shoulder lightly. He had a good point though. There was no need to continue this now that you’ve officially handed them out to just about everyone. However…
“Nah.”
“Nah? ” Mammon looks at you incredulously, but you notice the excitement on Asmodeus’ face. You knew at least he’d be up for this.
“Nah. I’m going to keep going until I land the perfect pick up line. The real goal is to give Lucifer one that’s so good that he ends up liking them.” A snort instantly leaves Mammon.
“That’s never gonna happen, human.”
You tap your finger against your chin in mock thought. “Hmm. Watch me.”