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The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Non-garlic bread is for wusses!
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Your girlfriend will totally understand if you kill her best friend.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Have you already mentioned that you're immortal today? At least ten times?
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Vampire hunters are the perfect comic relief.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Wearing sunglasses will protect your entire body from the sun.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Do tell people that forever is a very long time. They may not be aware.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
True love only happens via mind-control.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Blood-soaked is the new black. Especially when it's not yours.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Time for another existential crisis! Your last one was at least five pages ago.
The Worst Vampire Muse (@worstvampiremuse)
Just suck harder.
