Work Text:
“Sorry, just a second.”
“No problem.”
Sakyo pulled out his phone. The smile that had been plastered across his face all night was turning into a frown, and his eyebrows were beginning to furrow.
Omi looked down at the table between them. He was on the verge of making a comeback victory against Sakyo in mahjong tonight, and they had still barely made a dent in the bottle of sake next to them.
He suspected that whatever conversation Sakyo was tapping out on his phone was work-related, but he was hoping it wasn’t going to upset their quiet evening at home. Azami was out with Kumon and Shifuto tonight, and would be staying the night at Shifuto’s house. This was the kind of opportunity they rarely got.
Thinking about this, Omi’s smile was turning into a frown as well.
Finally, Sakyo looked up as he put his phone back into his pocket. The apologetic look on his face told Omi all he needed to know.
“You…have to go?”
“Yeah…sorry…”
“It’s fine, I know you can’t help it sometimes. Just be careful okay?”
Sakyo stood up with a heavy sigh, walked over to Omi and bent down to give him a kiss that lingered a bit longer than an “off to work” kiss normally would. “I will be,” he said, with another sigh.
Omi sat and watched as Sakyo moved to put on his coat and open the door. He was moving slowly, and he looked almost stooped, like a large weight was pressing down on him.
“Hey.”
In one fluid movement, Omi got up, grabbed Sakyo’s arm and turned him around so they were face to face. He shut the door with his free hand.
“Are you really going to be okay?” Omi stared into Sakyo’s eyes, as though he was looking for something to reassure him.
“Yeah…I’ll be fine….I promise,” Sakyo reached his hand up to caress Omi’s face, wanting to comfort him, but Omi flinched away.
“Bullshit!” Sakyo was the one who flinched now. Despite his past, Omi rarely swore. “Don’t make promises you can’t keep!”
Omi paused, as though waiting for Sakyo to say something, but the other man was still too stunned to respond.
“You think I can’t tell?” Omi continued, with no regard for the volume of his voice, “I may not have been yakuza, but I lived in that same kinda world for years! Sure, every day has some risk. Every day you’re aware that you might not come home in the same shape as when you left. And every day you do your best to suppress that awareness, cause it does you no good, and you’ll probably be fine anyways. But there are also some nights…nights where you can’t stop that awareness from bubbling up. Where the risk is so high you KNOW that you might not come home in one piece, if you even come home at all,” Omi’s voice was starting to crack, “I can tell when a man is heading out for one of those nights. And this is one of them. So don’t insult me by pretending it’s all going to be okay. Tell me truth for fuck’s sake. I’m a grown man, I can handle it.” Omi was shaking, and he could feel the tears welling up in his eyes. But his face was still hard, and he continued to stare at Sakyo, waiting for him to say something.
Sakyo stared back at Omi blankly for a moment, then looked down and took a deep breath. Looking back at Omi, his eyes were no longer apologetic, or comforting, but hard. Just like Omi’s were now.
“You’re right,” He put a hand on Omi’s shoulder, “I forget sometimes that you used to be even more dangerous than me,” he smirked as he said it and Omi had a smirk of his own in response to the slightly dark humour. Still could be, he thought. “I can’t tell you the details obviously, but something’s gone wrong, and I need to help clean it up. I don’t think…I don’t think there’s any life-threatening danger but there are a lot of unknowns.” Softening his gaze slightly, and squeezing Omi’s shoulder, Sakyo continued, “I promise to do my best to come back to you in one piece.”
Letting go of Sakyo’s arm, Omi wrapped his arms around in and pulled him in for a hug, burying his face into Sakyo’s hair, “I’m holding you to that,” he choked through the now flowing tears, “I guess…I should let you go…”
“Yeah…I should hurry,” Sakyo slowly pulled away as Omi loosened his hold.
“I could probably get you there faster on my bike you know, there are lots of shortcuts,” Omi was smiling now, despite the fresh tears still rolling down his cheeks.
“Absolutely not,” Sakyo put a hand on Omi’s chest to emphasise his point.
“It’ll make me worry less.”
“I doubt that…but fine I guess I am in a hurry.”
“I assume I’ll be dropping you off a block away from where you actually need to be.”
“Yup.”
“Got it, let’s go.”
Omi drove incredibly fast. Much faster than Sakyo had experienced before and definitely much faster than the speed limit. His shortcuts were also…inventive…but exhilarating. Riding with him now, like this, Sakyo could begin to understand how it must have felt to fight in a gang like the Wolves. His adrenaline was already pumping so much, he was itching for a fight.
“Here?” Omi slowed the bike down.
“Yeah.”
Stopping completely so that Sakyo could get off, Omi looked up at him, and flipped up the visor on his helmet, “Give ‘em hell,” he said with a grin.
Sakyo grinned back, “Damn right I will.”
Without another word, Omi rode back to the dorms. That felt like a fitting way to send off his boyfriend. In a way, he felt more like a comrade-in-arms just then than he did a lover. Maybe they were both. Omi smiled at that idea. He had originally planned to sneak around and try to keep watch over Sakyo, but when he saw Sakyo standing there, really looking like a high-ranking yakuza about to bust some heads, he realised that Sakyo didn’t need watching over. This was his battle, and he could fight it.
Once he was back in his own room though, he was less sure. About everything. What had felt right just moments before now felt like a huge mistake. Those feelings of confidence were a distant memory, one he couldn’t quite recall. How could he let him go? Why didn’t he follow him? His boyfriend was out there doing god knows what and he just dropped him off like it was some fucking slumber party.
Screaming, he pounded the wall next to him with his fist. The pain brought him back briefly and he checked the wall. “Good thing it’s concrete…” he muttered to himself, although there were a few chips now missing from that area.
Not noticing the blood on his fist, he jumped down from the bed and tried to do some work. What had he just been saying to Sakyo? He was a grown ass man. He should be able to handle this. He knew in his head that Sakyo will probably be fine and worrying is useless. Why couldn’t his heart understand that?
There were a lot of photos from this week’s shoots that needed to be reviewed and edited. If he can just get to work, time will pass and soon enough Sakyo will be back home. His eyes soon glazed over as he scrolled through them though. Images of Sakyo getting punched, kicked, stabbed and even shot replaced every photo on the screen in front of him.
Another shout as he pushed himself away from the desk and stood up. What was he doing? Maybe he should go back…He couldn’t carry on like this and he didn’t want to actually destroy the room.
Just as he was about to grab his jacket, he heard a soft noise, “Omi-kun…?”
It was Taichi, timidly peaking through the door, “S- some of the guys said they heard shouting so I came to check on you…is something wrong?”
Omi turned to face Taichi, and at once he fell to his knees, tears streaming from his eyes and his body shaking.
Without a word Taichi closed the door and rushed over. He did his best to put his arms around his giant roommate, and squeezed as hard as he could. “Did something happen with Sakyo-nii?” he asked gently. Omi nodded, then, a moment later, shook his head.
“No…” he barely choked out the word, “He- he’s fine…probably…I just…”
“You’re worried he might not be?” Omi nodded again, and Taichi moved around so that Omi could rest his head on his chest. It was awkward, comforting someone so much larger like this, but he wanted to do all he could. “Sakyo-nii is tough, and real scary, and he has all the other Ginsenkai guys with him! You think Ken-san would let anything to happen to him?”
Smiling a little thinking about Sakoda, Omi nodded, “You’re right…I just…I’ve seen this all before. People getting into fights. People getting hurt. People…” Omi couldn’t finish his sentence before breaking down in to tears again. He grabbed desperately onto Taichi’s shirt and sobbed into his chest.
“You’re thinking about Nachi?”
Omi’s head snapped up, hands still on Taichi’s shirt, “I’ve already lost two people in my life…I don’t think I could handle losing a third.” And he really couldn’t. The thought of having another person ripped away from him was paralysing. It was his worst nightmare. He’d been worrying about Sakyo’s safety since day one, but this is the first time Sakyo himself has acknowledged there was real danger. He hadn’t seem scared, but he was uneasy. That was enough to make Omi worry far more than he ever had before.
Taichi had tears in his eyes now. He couldn’t bare to see Omi upset like this. “I have an idea,” he put his hands on Omi’s shoulders and gave him a light shake, “You wait here.”
Bewildered, Omi waited as instructed. Being alone, even for a few minutes was hard on him. Thoughts were swirling in his head and he was clenching his fists so tight he was drawing blood.
Taichi came back, grinning from ear to ear, a DVD in his hand. Grabbing Omi’s laptop, he set it up on the table so they could both see, then played the DVD.
“Is this…Ginji?” Omi was confused, but at least the confusion was distracting.
“Yup! You’re going to watch Sakyo-nii be a total badass beating up the bad guys.”
“By bad guys you mean me.”
“Ahaha…yeah?”
“And he barely survives in the end…”
“But he survives! That’s what matters!” Omi frowned. He wasn't convinced. It sounded like a terrible idea to him. “Listen,” Taichi sat in front of Omi, “You keep thinking about Nachi right? And about other things you’ve seen?” Omi nodded slowly, “Well, those are big, vibrant images in your head. It’s gonna be hard to counter those with just thoughts and words. So instead, you’ll counter them with these images! Images of Sakyo-nii saving the day and coming home.” Taichi was grinning, clearly proud of his idea.
Encouraged by Taichi’s enthusiasm, Omi watched, trying to let himself get absorbed by Sakyo’s acting. Sure enough, he got completely caught up in it. Watching Sakyo act was always a treat, but seeing him be so strong and tough was exactly what he needed to get some of the peskier thoughts out of his mind. It was hypnotic. He could watch him move around on stage for days.
Surprisingly, seeing himself as the villain was also rather cathartic. It was like Yokota represented all the doubt and negativity in his mind. And here was Sakyo, cutting it down for him.
After it finished, Omi turned to Taichi. He was no longer crying but his eyes were red and swollen, stains left by the tears lingering on his face. Taichi looked back at him with a smile, “You wanna watch it again?”
“Yeah,” Omi smiled now, and tousled Taichi’s hair before leaning back and enjoying the show.
They watched it three and a half times before there was a knock on the door.
Omi jumped up so fast he knocked against the table, sending the laptop to the floor with a thud. Running to the door he swung it open, almost tearing it from the hinges, revealing Sakyo, whose coat was a little dirty, and who was clearly tired, but also totally fine.
“Tch- how do you look worse than me?” Sakyo said, noting Omi’s face and bloodied hands.
Instead of an answer, Omi pulled Sakyo in for a hug that lasted long enough for Taichi to put away the laptop, grab some of his things, leave a note saying he’ll be staying in Sakyo and Azami’s room tonight and sneak past the two men in the doorway.
“I’m sorry I ever doubted you,” Omi said, letting Sakyo go just enough so that they could be face to face.
“It’s not your fault…I know it’s hard on you…I’m sorry I was gone for so long”
“It was hard at first, but Taichi helped,” Omi was smiling now, and planting light kisses on Sakyo’s face as they spoke.
“Oh?” Sakyo inhaled sharply when one of Omi’s kisses landed on his neck.
“We watched Ginji together, almost four times. Watching you made me feel a lot better.”
“Watching me kick your ass?” Sakyo chuckled, but he understood. Omi needed to see something to give him hope.
“Exactly,” Omi stopped the kisses for a moment and looked into Sakyo’s eyes. He could see some worry in them, but with how Sakyo had found him, that made sense. “I can’t promise not to worry anymore though.”
“I know…just…try to feel how you felt on your bike earlier.”
“Huh?”
“You felt invincible didn’t you? That’s why you were so confident sending me off.”
“Yeah…I guess I did.”
“And you felt like we were a team?”
“Yeah,” Omi smiled, that was exactly how he had felt.
“Well we are a team. And so long as you feel invincible, I do too. I couldn’t have gotten through the night without the way you dropped me off. It gave me a confidence I wouldn’t have otherwise had.”
“Really?”
“Mhmm.”
“In that case I promise to always drop you off for your tough jobs…whenever it’s safe of course. And while you’re out working, I’ll be here remembering what a badass you are,” Omi grinned. Watching Ginji so many times had done a lot to remind him of what a badass his boyfriend was. Even if it was stage fighting, he knew Sakyo easily translated that into the real world.
“Good,” Sakyo smiled, “Now are you going to let me in?”
“Oh!” slightly embarrassed, Omi stumbled back, letting Sakyo enter the room.
Discovering Taichi’s note, the couple decided to make the most out of the rest of their night.