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Tom wasn't good at being open with his feelings.
Hell, he wasn't good at being open about much of anything. Edd knew that, and so did Matt. But, there were the occasional spurts of anger, and they were a big deal. When Tom was livid: do. not. engage. They discovered that was the best plan after an incident where Tom had left Matt on the verge of tears and Edd almost being hit in the head. With a chair. Funny to think about, but not so much for Edd. Though that happened only once, it became an unspoken rule in the house to let Tom figure his problems out alone, so that there wouldn't be another incident.
Tonight, Tom had come home particularly late, storming through the door and kicking off his shoes, passing Edd on the couch without even a ‘hey’, or hell, not even a glance in his direction. The only greeting Edd got was a distasteful slam of a door from down the hall.
Let it slide, Tom will figure it out.
He was never upset for long anyways, and he was usually fine in the morning, albeit a little grumpy. Nothing a good night’s sleep couldn't fix! Yet still, Edd found himself slowing down on his way to his room, only to pensively stare at Tom's closed door. He couldn't tell if he should've been more concerned about the fact that muffled sobbing came from the other side of the door. Edd found himself wanting to break down that door to make sure Tom was okay, but he took a deep breath instead, and found his way to his own room. Tom will figure it out.
Maybe he shouldn't have let it slide this time. By the time he had satisfied himself with a bowl of cereal the next morning, he was still the only one at the table. Well, except for Matt, but that was the usual. Tom hadn’t shown up, which struck Edd as plain odd, considering all of them usually were awake at this time.
After abruptly standing and rinsing his bowl in the sink, he decided to pull a new bowl from the cabinet above him, and grab the box of cereal afterwards. He could feel Matt’s confused stare burning into his back, but he chose to ignore it as he poured milk into the bowl.
He carried the bowl past Matt and down the hall. He stopped in front of Tom's door, still shut like last night. Edd sighed as he knocked on the door. He went through an entire internal argument if he should just abandon this plan, but to his relief, he heard a muffled voice from the other side of the door.
“‘s unlocked,”
Edd clicked his tongue and turned the handle of the door, before slowly pushing it open. The first thing he saw was the huge mass of blankets on the bed, and the sun blocked out by the closed blinds. Edd saw the pile of blankets shift. Yep, Tom was definitely somewhere hidden in there. He placed the bowl of cereal and spoon on Tom's desk, being careful to not trip over the clothes that were haphazardly thrown across the floor. Edd then sat at the foot of Tom's bed.
“Tom? Are you alright?”
“I don't wanna talk right now.” Tom muttered. His voice was small and hoarse, almost muffled entirely under the pile of sheets.
“Okay, okay. I left cereal on your desk, but I can leave now if you-”
“Edd.”
“Tom?”
“Please, I need a hug.”
Tom’s voice was so quiet, Edd thought it was a hallucination. Tom?? And physical contact?? That was new, and he thought Tom was still pissed from last night. Yeah, he must be hallucinating. “What?”
Tom gave a prolonged sigh. “Do I have to repeat myse-”
Edd snorted and rolled his eyes. “Of course I'll give you a hug, Tom. It's just impossible with all the… blankets.”
Tom slowly flipped the covers from over his face. He screwed his eyes shut as he adjusted to the light. He had a blue hood over his head, and his hair fell flat and spread messily over his face like bangs. His eyes were puffy, the bags under his eyes were far more prominent than usual, and his scabbed lip jutted into a small pout.
He barely met Edds gaze and fell into his open arms, burying his face entirely in the green fabric and wrapping his arms around his waist. He hadn't hugged Edd in ages, but the familiarity of it hit him like a brick wall. Or rather, like a cozy blanket that contrasted the dead of winter. It was comfy and warm. Tom thought Edd’s hugs were better than any blanket if he were being honest, but he wouldn't tell him that.
Edd’s chin rested on Tom's head, and he could feel occasional shudders and shakes from Tom, but decided to ask against it. If anything, he only held Tom tighter. The comfortable silence passed as Tom mumbled into Edd’s hoodie.
“‘m sorry. I just need a distraction right now.”
Edd smiled and patted Tom on the back. “Can I let go? I have an idea for that.”
Tom reluctantly unwrapped his arms from Edd, and watched questioningly as he stood from the bed. Edd picked up a gel pen that sat on his desk, and shot Tom a smile as he headed back to sit cross legged in front of him, while sinking down into the bed.
“Sleeves please.” Edd nudged the end of the pen at Tom's wrist, and Tom rolled up one of his sleeves until the blue fabric bunched up at his elbows. Tom's empty gaze turned down to the sheets, where he picked at the material of the bedsheet with his nail.
Edd took Tom's forearm in his hand, his wrist facing upward. The first thing Edd noticed was the faint scars and lines scattered across Tom’s wrist, that were almost invisible in the drowned out sun. Unhealthy coping and cutting was something Tom had struggled with throughout high school, and Edd played a part in helping him steer away from those habits. By the looks of it, he was still clean, which left Edd with a bittersweet proudness for his friend. His smile quickly fell as he heard Tom uncomfortably clear his throat from across him. Edd muttered a quick apology and adjusted his grip. He clicked the gel pen on his knee before looking at the blank canvas that was Tom's wrist.
“Don't look.”
Tom grumbled and turned his head to look at the wall. He shivered as he felt the ink drag on his wrist, and tried his best not to jerk his arm away from the ticklish feeling.
Edd kept drawing as he spoke up, eyes still fixed on Tom's wrist. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Tom shook his head with his eyes narrowed.
“Okay, but I'm here if you choose to." Edd knew he wouldn't be able to get Tom to open up anyway, and he could respect that. Edd hummed proudly at his finished design. “Here, you can look now.”
Tom looked down at his wrist. Random shapes and squiggles surrounded a small cat, most likely Ringo, sitting over top of scribbled words that read: "Stay PAWsitive!" with many exclamation points to follow. Tom scoffed, and tried to hold back a dumb smile.
“Edd, I love it, but you really had to make a pun?”
Edd snorted, before bursting out laughing. Tom's face was absolutely priceless, a mix of a cringe and a pained expression hidden behind a wobbly smile. Edd wheezed out words between his laughter. At this point, he was just laughing at Tom's expression, rather than from his own joke. “Tom, you're my best… FURend! You should be used to the puns.”
Tom basically choked at the mention of another pun. He didn't realize he was laughing along until his chest burned. It hurt to laugh, but it felt like a weight was lifted from his chest. “Edd! God, please stop.”
“Don't give me that CAT-ittude. You know you like them.” Edd poked Tom's shoulder with his pen. His bubbly laughter mixed with Tom’s, and it resonated soundly throughout the room.
Edd learned to let Tom be when he was upset. He learned to steer clear from Tom when he was a fuming wreck. Maybe it was because of the fear of a repeat of that one time incident, or maybe he thought it was easier not to care, and easier to push down the sympathy he felt when Tom usually came home wiping tears furiously from his eyes.
But he couldn't deny, a smile looked good on Tom. He would do anything to see him smile so genuinely again, even if that meant learning to help Tom through thick and thin. After all, that's what friends were for!