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The Combat Gods are here. I know this, for I am near them. I crouch on the edge of the crater. I can see them.
Well, okay. I can’t see them. I’m blind. But I can hear and feel them. As well as smell and even taste, thanks to the smells. But mostly hear.
Ah, right. An introduction would be proper now, wouldn’t it.
The name is Hol. I’m a female Plutyrian Ground Bat. I’m an impressive specimen-16 years old, yet 2.5 metres tall and 1000 pounds (or about 500 kilograms) in weight. I’m fast, strong, deadly…
…And alone.
You see, back home, a massive wildfire started. For some reason, every other Ground Bat on Plutyria was in that giant forest, and-long story short-I’m alone. No, it doesn’t make much sense, doesn’t it?
It was sad. I cried for quite some time. But then, by sheer dumb luck, I remembered something. On another planet-“Earth”, I think it is called-there is a ruined land known only as “Marlaque”. In this land is said to reside an ancient relic that appears once every 1000 years. This relic can grant one wish before vanishing into the abyss for another millennium.
If you are strong of body and mind, then your wish will be granted. If you are not…Death awaits.
They say that most don’t make it past the mist that surrounds Marlaque. But I have. Therefore, I must be strong of both body and mind. But is it enough?
I sure as cuss hope so.
---.---
Using my extraordinary powers of hearing and touch, I hear and feel the Combat Gods rush towards each other. I shudder. I am strong, fast and smart, for sure-but even I cannot fight even one of them. And both is right out of the question.
But that is when I remember something. Something that doesn’t work in every situation, but it could just work here.
Work smarter, not harder.
I raise my Staff. Sorry, I should have mentioned the Staff. I am a master magician, capable of performing all kinds of magic. And now, some of it will help me.
I equip a few spells. Invisibility, to remain unseen, Muffle, to keep my footsteps unheard, Agility, to increase my speed and jumping abilities, and Invoke Weather, to make it rain and mask my scent, as well as provide a distraction.
And then, I rush across the crater. I know where to go.
The Combat Gods have reached each other. Apart from being a little confused by the sudden rain, they are unbothered. But just before they can begin their duel, I rush past them, keeping at least 200 metres between them and me. I’m not taking any chances.
I reach the other side of the crater, and spot the cave opening. After a few quick checks, I unequip Invisibility and Muffle, and sneak in.
---.---
The cave echoes when I use my echolocation. It is how I expected it to be-tall, dark, wide, slightly wet, etc. But there is something else too.
I use my senses to sense it. There is some kind of platform, and on top of it-
-The Relic!
But there is something else too. A being, an almighty one, next to the Relic. I can tell that it is watching me. Thanks to my advanced echolocation, I figure out that it is a Human-Looking Goddess.
I cannot just rush over, grab the relic and leave. I need to make sure that the Goddess knows that she is in charge.
I grovel before her, and begin to speak.
“Oh great Goddess of Marlaque. I have crossed the mists and this ruined land, and technically won my combat by using my intellect. I believe that I am worthy of this relic, but I must pass your judgement. Please, judge me now, and if I am deemed unfit, cast me from this land.”
Silence. Then the Goddess speaks.
“Huh. You know, that is the first time someone has spoken to me.” She replies.
I look up, halting my grovelling slowly but surely. “Really?” I reply.
I figure out that she’s smiling. “Of course. So far, everyone else has just taken the Relic and run. But not you. You must be eager to please.”
I smile as best as I can. “Eh. I try.”
---.---
For the next 10 minutes, whilst the Combat Gods duel outside, me and the Goddess have a rather pleasant conversation. But then, she reminds me of what I came here for. The Relic.
“Of course!” I cry, facepalming. “I asked for your judgment, didn’t I?!”
“Yes.” She softly responds. “And for your trueness of body, heart and mind, as well as your politeness, I deem you worthy of this Relic. Take it. It is yours.”
I reach out and close my clawed hand around the Relic. It feels warm yet cool to the touch. Lukewarm.
I use my Staff to create a portable chamber to hold the Relic in. We say our thanks and goodbyes, and as I leave the cave, I wish her good luck and good health for the rest of her days. She does the same for me.
---.---
I re-equip Invisibility and Muffle, and race across the crater again. This time however, I keep 300 metres from the Combat Gods. I really don’t want to take any chances.
I begin to have thoughts. Heh. I think to myself as I gallop over the crater and up its rim. Working smarter instead of harder may not work in every situation, but for this one, it certainly seems to have won the day!
As I reach the top of the crater, before I head out of Marlaque and back towards the hidden portal leading to home, I steal a listen to the Combat Gods, before quickly continuing to flee. They are still going, but tiring.
I planned this for quite some time. I didn’t think it would go like this! I think to myself. Then I think of words to describe the still-duelling Combat Gods.
Idiots.