Chapter Text
When Harry Potter turned 5, strange lettering appeared on his skin. They read “Harry Potter, boy-who-lived, come to die”.
The fact that the boy was going to die (and soon) would be a shock to any 5 year old. Harry Potter, after a few days of being locked in the cupboard, decides that, if he’s going to die young (it did mention that he was still a boy), he was going to burn as brightly as possible. If he was going to die young, he was going to die great, and people would hear his name and remember what he did.
In another world, Harry Potter simply accepts that the Dursleys are his lot in life. He accepts that he’s just a freak and nobody would ever want him by the tender age of 11. In another world, he befriends a red-haired boy who felt like warmth, fudge, grass, home and a bushy, brown haired girl who would smell of books, ink, parchment, cleverness.
In this world, Harry Potter fought.
In another world, Harry Potter would stream past his classes with just barely the grade to get by. In this world, Harry fights, he yells and he screams and claws at his aunt and uncle. He studies under the small lightbulb in the cupboard under the stairs (some things aren’t worth fighting for and besides, he’s comfortable in the small room. It’s unequivocally his) and grits his teeth and claws his way to the top until he’s the star student of the school, always helpful when people ask for it (what good is greatness if one is not good?).
In another world, Harry Potter would be sullen and quiet, the neighbours would hate him, and Petunia and Vernon Dursley would be able to excuse increasingly abusive behaviour as “setting him right”. In another world, Vernon Dursley would successfully bluff that Harry Potter goes to a school for juvenile delinquents.
In this world, Harry Potter grins, he waves, he laughs, and he plays with the other kids. Sure, the other children think he’s odd, but in a harmless way. In this world, Harry Potter is loved by the residents of Little Whinging, and because of him, Little Whinging becomes greater, in its own special way. If Harry had died then, had Harry died before the Hogwarts letter and a new magical world was opened to him, he would’ve already been satisfied.
This is not to say that this Harry Potter did not have his faults. His temper was explosive, his demeanor a bit too frantic, his hair still a wild untameable mess and an instant dislike of anything that was a particular shade of green.
In another world, Harry Potter would not have known magic until he was 11 years old, and a giant of a man broke the front door of a hut in the middle of nowhere to proclaim him a wizard. In this world, Harry Potter snuck into the attic when he was 9 and found letters and a trunk, packed with pictures and books about the magical world. He kept it a secret, of course, but he knew about the wizarding world, and learnt about the quirks and steps of magic. And of course, he learnt about his parents.
In another world, Harry Potter would be starving for scraps of information about his parents. In another world, the two closest friends to both Lily and James would both die; one in a stupid, stupid set of circumstances, while the other would die to give Harry Potter a chance to strike down the Dark Lord.
In this world, Harry Potter learns of his parents through letters addressed to him from his parents. He learns of Remus Lupin, of Sirius Black, of Peter Pettigrew, of the Marauders. He learns of Severus Snape, of Alice and Frank Longbottom, of Albus Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall. He learns of the people his parents left behind and wondered if any of them were left behind like him as well.
(When he hears of Sirius Black’s escape and finds a large black dog in Little Whinging, he smiles, and calls him Padfoot, asks him who exactly he was looking for, and asks if he can help kill the traitor. When Sirius looked at him, at the boy who was burning bright but still burning, he thought “we’re one and the same, you and I. left behind with nowhere to go but up.” and wondered if his own life had a time limit ticking.)
In another world, the Dursleys would flee, running away from the letters addressed to the too small, broken boy huddled in the cupboard under the stairs. In another world, the boy has to pretend to be a hero, to pretend to want to be great, when all he wants is to be normal, to be loved.
In this world, Harry Potter knows who he is, and what he wants. When he gets the letter, he informs his guardians that he has been accepted into a new boarding school, where he would be going from now on. In this world, Petunia Dursley is quiet because she knows exactly where Harry Potter is going, knows that the boy knows of her sister of magic (two bright, sharp-edged things, dazzling the world with what they can do; what they are willing to do to be great, to be remembered) and lets him go.
In another world, it would take a half-giant bashing down the door to finally deliver the letter. In this one, Professor Minerva McGonagall is surprised to see a letter to her in the school letter. After reading the contents, she goes to visit Albus Dumbledore and demands for Mr. Potter’s place of residence to be changed (“He sleeps in a cupboard Albus. A cupboard.”). In this world, Minerva McGonagall visits Harry Potter and takes him to Diagon Alley. In another world, Harry Potter is a shy, underfed and tiny thing. In this world, Harry burns bright, his steps a touch too fast, his eyes drinking in every single store. He moves with grace.
In another world, Harry Potter would never know what his full inheritance was, taken by the goblins as recompense for robbing the bank. In another world, Harry Potter would never be more than simply frosty with goblins. In this world, the goblins see a bright, sharp-edged boy walk confidently into the bank. They see Harry Potter burning bright, asking for a good recommendation of a book on goblin customs. They see the beginnings of a goblinfriend.
Some things, however, never change. When Harry Potter meets Draco Malfoy at Madam Malkin’s, he does not see Dudley (tempered by the changing atmosphere of Little Whinging). He sees his uncle Vernon, trying to act all high and mighty, trying to show that ‘I am better than you’. In all worlds, Harry Potter dislikes Draco Malfoy at first. Being great is never a factor of being better than anyone else.
(Draco Malfoy, however, sees a boy, burning bright, shining with potential, with the ability to be great, and thinks ‘maybe I should learn more about him’)
In another world, Harry Potter is only allowed to buy the essentials required to go to school. In another world, Harry Potter’s trunk is one of the lowest quality, and his only good clothes are school robes. In this world, Harry Potter buys a high-end trunk with expanded interiors and a featherlight charm. In this world, Harry Potter buys as many books as Professor McGonagall has the patience for (budding ravenclaw, eh? asks the shopkeeper) and buys a full wardrobe. The most important difference, however, is that while in another world, Harry Potter is excited, in this world, Harry Potter is happy.
In another world, Garrick Ollivander talks about how the Phoenix Feather of Harry Potter’s Holly and Phoenix Feather wand is a brother to the Dark Lord’s and Harry Potter is torn between disgust and self-loathing. In this world, when Garrick Ollivander brings up the subject, Harry Potter wonders what happened to the Dark Lord as a boy, if he could’ve also been great, instead of terrible.
(Garrick Ollivander saw two boys, two bright, sharp-edged things. Two boys, both destined to either be great or terrible. He wondered if the same mistakes would be made this time.)
In another world, Harry Potter would be lost in King’s Cross, and Molly Weasley would see a too-small boy in too-large clothes and decide there and then that boy is family. In another world, Harry Potter would meet Ronald (don’t call me Ronald!) Weasley and the two would go on to become lifelong friends.
In this world, Harry Potter crosses the barrier alone and finds Neville Longbottom on the train. In this world, Harry Potter remembers the letters written by his parents, of Lily’s close friend Alice and her husband Frank. He sits with Neville Longbottom.
(He learns of the fate of Frank and Alice Longbottom. He wonders, if Neville is like him, left behind where others have moved on.)
(Neville wonders if this boy, this bright, sharp-edged boy is also defined by his words as he is.)
(Neville’s words read: “Be brave for me, will you? Continue my legacy.”)
When the sorting comes, many things stay the same. Hermione Granger once again is sorted into Gryffindor after a long fight against the sorting hat. Ron Weasley is also sorted there, rather more quickly. Draco Malfoy is still sorted into Slytherin, although it takes a few moments for the hat to decide rather than as soon as the hat touches his head.
Some things, however, do not. Neville Longbottom is sorted into Hufflepuff, after a long conversation with the hat. And of course, Harry Potter himself.
In another world, Harry Potter begs for the hat to not put him into Slytherin, and perhaps after many years, he will hate himself for it. In another world, Harry Potter makes a split-second choice between a boy who was kind to him and a boy who was not. (They were all just lonely, lonely boys)
In this world, Harry Potter discusses why the hat shouldn’t put him into Slytherin. I’m already great, you see? And I want to keep being great, I don’t want to become great again somehow.
The hat deliberates for a while. I wonder… are you opposed to making other people great?
Harry Potter laughs. That’s part of being great, I think.
And then the hat cries out “HUFFLEPUFF!”
In another world, Harry Potter is considered the stereotypical Gryffindor. In another world, Harry Potter is reckless and impulsive, and rarely thinks of himself at all. He is self-sacrificing, infuriatingly noble, and wholly good according to Albus Dumbledore.
In this world, Harry Potter is anything but a stereotypical Hufflepuff. He burns bright, plays and laughs and screams like a Gryffindor, he studies and plans and researches like a Ravenclaw, he takes advantage of every resource at is disposal and is unafraid to manipulate circumstances to his advantage like a Slytherin.
Despite that, underneath, there are still the fundamental qualities of a Hufflepuff, the ones he embodies, even if no one notices. Of loyalty and fair play. Of friendship and kindness and compassion. Of being great.
(People tend to forget that in her time, Helga Hufflepuff was the most feared defender of Haugh’s Wards Castle, and the children within. People remember the kindness and compassion but forget that badgers are most vicious when enemies attack their young.)
Albus Dumbledore is rather confused. Whatever he expected from Harry Potter (a weapon, a figurehead, a martyr), he did not expect the bright, sharp-edged boy with an explosive temper and a violent tendency to protect his friends at all costs. He did not expect a leader, burning bright. Albus Dumbledore does not know how to work with another leader, for there has always only been one on both the side of Good and Evil.
(Albus Dumbledore forgets the shades of grey between pure Good and pure Evil. He forgets that he himself was once the lover of the very same Evil that he fought to protect the innocent. Albus Dumbledore may not be a bad man, but he is a man who forgets.)
In another world, most of the teachers of Hogwarts think Harry Potter is a fairly average student, except on a broom. Severus Snape thinks of Harry Potter as the second coming of James Potter, here to torture him till his death.
In this world, Harry Potter is seen as a shining star amongst the badgers. Pomona Sprout is incredibly proud, Minerva McGonagall is somewhat peeved.
Severus Snape sees the second coming of Lily when Harry Potter smiles at him. After the sorting is over, and he is securely locked in his quarters, he weeps, and mourns for Lily Evans properly for the first time. He thinks you would be proud of him Lily; I’ve only seen him for a few seconds, and I think I already am, too.
(When Harry Potter finally tells him about the letters his mother wrote to him, about a small, beaten, broken boy learning to live again, about a young man slowly twisting, becoming unrecognizable, to the other side of the war, Severus Snape weeps for himself, for the boy he was, playing at the war of two old men.)
When Harry Potter accidentally encounters the Cerberus in the forbidden corridor, he immediately tells all his Hufflepuff housemates about it. Susan Bones mentioned it to her Aunt Amelia in a letter the next day.
The day after that, Amelia Bones barged in through the front doors during breakfast, with a whole squadron of Aurors behind her. “ALBUS PERCIVAL WULFRIC BRIAN DUMBLEDORE!” she screamed “YOU DARE TO PUT OUR CHILDREN AT RISK FOR NO REASON AT ALL! WE WILL BE REMOVING WHATEVER THE HELL YOU HAVE PUT UP IN THE THIRD FLOOR CORRIDOR AND BY MERLIN IF YOU TRY AND STOP US, I WILL ARREST YOU ON THE SPOT!”
Susan Bones thought it was terribly impressive. Harry Potter was busy cracking up with his best friend Neville Longbottom.
When Harry Potter gets the highest marks in the whole school in the exams before the Christmas Holidays, everyone is surprised for a moment before thinking well, that’s Harry Potter, of course he’s the top student.
Hermione Granger however, seeing how hard Harry Potter was working, between talking to his friends, studying like his life depended on it, resolved to study why Harry Potter was the best.
Neville Longbottom was in awe of his friend, and idly wondered if the person who would ask him to carry their legacy would be as great as him before shaking it off and going back to talking about normal things.
Susan Bones, however, noticed things that most other people did not, as did her best friend Hannah Abbott. They noticed how frantic Harry Potter seemed to be sometimes, how he always had a smile for everyone, how when he joked about being great, there was a sense of desperation in his face. They wondered when Harry Potter would burn out, and if he did, would anyone be there for him? They wondered once, quite morbidly, if anyone would come to the funeral of Harry Potter.
Draco Malfoy wondered, quite rightly, if it was really worth it to continue antagonizing Harry Potter and lose a valuable ally (and though he would not admit it until the bitter end, a good friend).
Harry Potter himself, however, was winding down slightly. He didn’t quite relax (he’d relax when he was dead), but he slowed down somewhat, trying to enjoy the few days where he didn’t quite need to study as much. He wondered how life would be if he didn’t have such a short time limit.
In another world, Harry Potter stays at Hogwarts with Ronald Weasley, and experiences his first Christmas where he is sure that he is loved. In another world, Harry Potter is gifted the invisibility cloak, and finds the mirror of Erised, he finds out what he wants the most is a family, his parents. Each day after that, he wonders what if.
In this world, Harry Potter goes home to warm Little Whinging. He knows he is loved, by his friends both in Hogwarts and here. He makes sure to speak to them all, to say hi to each and every one of his neighbours. He still receives the invisibility cloak, but he gives that to Dudley Dursley (I can probably make myself invisible with magic Duds, you should keep that).
In another world, Harry Potter would wake up in Gryffindor Tower, and would be stunned with surprise that anyone would buy him gifts. In this world, he goes out of his way to buy every single one of his acquaintances a gift. He buys Neville a wand holster, he buys Susan a book about warding, he buys Professor Snape a book on lab equipment and safety. He buys, as always, a custom-made pin with a stag, a dog, a wolf and a mouse for one Remus Lupin; even if no one else was left, Harry Potter wanted to re-assure the man that he was not alone.
(Remus Lupin wondered who was sending him the pins, but he was grateful nevertheless, and he never left his home before putting one on. It was a reminder to him, that no matter what, someone out there still remembered that he existed.)
Dudley Dursley often wondered when his cousin would die. It was something Harry Potter had told him and only him a long time ago (“we’re brothers Duds, I won’t let you become your father” he had said, and those were his marks). It seemed like he was still alive and kicking, but every single time he left for that magic school, Dudley Dursley worried that he would not come back.
Dudley Dursley, however, was quite happy that he’d found a brother at school as well
(“and next time, I’ll ask if he can visit, and I’ll introduce both of you! that way neither of you will be lonely when I’m gone”
“have you told him then?”
“not yet, no, I’ll tell him at the end of this year.”)
It was odd, Dudley thought, to think of his cousin, his brother as someone who was going to disappear. His brother, who had already accepted his death, and decided to fight and claw and burn despite that. His brother, who was already making contingency plans about his death while only 11 years old.
He thought his brother was terribly brave.
When Harry Potter returned to Hogwarts, Neville Longbottom asked as to how his holiday went. In response, Neville learnt more about Harry’s brother (“not by birth, but might as well have been”) than he’d have ever figured there was. He learnt about the shadowy presence in the back of his stories, always a solid figure to pick him up if he’d fallen down. Someone who he’d shine for no matter what. Someone who inspired him to be great. Neville wondered if he’d be worthy of even seeing this great person at all
Susan Bones, and by extension, Hannah Abbott heard about Harry Potter’s brother as well. They wondered how any person had earned so much trust from Harry Potter himself.
(Dudley Dursley became a myth of Hogwarts, a legend who raised the greatest of heroes: Harry Potter himself. Supposedly, he’d survived the killing curse too. After hearing this, Dudley Dursley wondered if Harry Potter would have been happy being remembered as that.)
The year ended uneventfully. This, for Albus Dumbledore, was quite odd, considering his defense teacher was still here and nothing terribly inconvenient (or just plain terrible) had happened to him.
When Albus Dumbledore went to talk to the defense for his second year, however (the first teacher to survive to continue teaching a new term since Professor Merrythought retired all those years ago, it was quite an honor, he mused) he found the dead body of Professor Quirrell slumped over his desk, as if he fell asleep. Albus Dumbledore rushed him to St. Mungo’s and wondered what went wrong this time.
(Harry’s only normal year had come to an end. There is something to be mourned there, even for the boy who had already accepted his own death as necessary. It is quite a sad thing, for something to be so horribly sad, yet no one knew it even was as such.)