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The raindrops came down making circular patterns in newly formed puddles. Yao carefully trotted towards the Pakistani man’s home having to step in the puddle once or twice huffing because he dirtied his shoes. Islamabad had dramatically gotten foggier.
The green city looked grey and gloomy during the rain. Yao hadn’t really brought an umbrella along so he was already drenched. In his mind he cursed himself for being so careless, what impression would he make on younger nations. Sighing, he refrained from ringing the bell and instead knocked repeatedly on the wooden door. Come on, please be home.
A few moments the door opened and a messy haired man stood in the doorway, he was in his usual plain shalwar kameez with a brown shawl draped around his shoulders. Yao smiled; whatever the situation was he was relieved to see his friend doing well.
“Yao?” he was extremely taken aback, he didn’t even inform him of his visit. “What are you-“he looked at the older man soaked from head to toe and stepped aside to let him in. “Oh hell just get inside!”
“Ni hao, Ahmed. I thought I’d give you a little surprise.” He got in wiping rainwater off his face; he really didn’t know what to say and just gave a sheepish smile. The Chinese man was holding a plastic bag with some neatly packaged boxes inside. “I even brought some homemade food because I’ve heard you’ve been hogging too much junk lately.” he placed the boxes on the table with a relieved sigh.
“Uhm that’s really thoughtful of you and stuff but…” he pointed to him with both hands. “Look at you, you’ll catch a cold!” Pakistan sighed deeply; he didn’t expect this from Yao of all people. “Seriously, don’t you check the weather forecast before leaving?”
“I don’t care about that stuff, If I decide to visit my loved ones one day I do it!” he gave a playful grin in return.
“Here.” He handed him a towel. “You’ll also need a change of clothes.” Pakistan said in thought, he wondered if some of his old clothes would fit him.
“Xie Xie!” he undid his ponytail and began to wipe his long soaked hair with the towel. “Ayaa its okay don’t worry about me.” He gave a reassuring look.
“Absolutely not, take better care of yourself old man!” Ahmed went to his room upstairs and came back with one of his old shalwar kameez. “See if this fits.”
“I think it might.” He went to the bathroom to change and came out with the clothes which were a perfect fit, well almost- the sleeves were a bit too long but that wasn’t really an issue for him for him since was used to oversized sleeves. “How do I look?”
“Dashing.” Ahmed couldn’t help but smile a little; Yao was the one person who genuinely made him smile. “Now come. What did you bring for me?”
“You’re being too kind; you’re the one who looks er… dashing.” He didn’t know if he had kept up with the kids on their latest slang. “I bought dumplings, some crispy Beijing beef and prawn chowmein. Everything’s halal.” He honestly loved going all out sometimes. Especially for his close friends and allies. He was a nurturing soul at heart.
“That’s a lot! You didn’t have to…” Despite saying so Pakistan was deeply touched by his gesture, he should’ve been used to it at this point but he still felt it was so sweet of him to bring all his favorite Chinese dishes. Someone actually took out the time for him. It made him feel all warm inside which was rare for someone like him. It thundered outside and a ray of lightning appeared near the window catching Yao by surprise.
“Ayaaa this rain doesn’t feel like it’s going to stop soon.” He worriedly looked at the rain pouring down against the windowsill.
“Welcome to Islamabad.” Ahmed said in a matter of fact manner. “Come on, make yourself comfortable.” He walked towards the sofa and wrapped himself in the blanket lying aside on it. Seemed like this was what he was doing before Yao arrived. It was getting chilly and Yao was tempted to join him.
“Bring some food here too! I’m so hungry.”
Yao nearly cringed. “Don’t tell me you… eat on the couch, that is just so-“he paused pressing his palms against his forehead and looking deeply disturbed. “Unsanitary.”
“Huh? No it’s fine I’ll clean it up later.” He said leaning back.
Yao sighed and took out one of the plastic boxes out of the wet bag; luckily the rainwater hadn’t spoiled his hard work. Okay just the dumplings. He walked over to the sofa as the rain drummed against the window pane; the only sound was the plastic box opening with a crack.
“Thanks!” Pakistan took a piece and bit into the succulent dumpling which tasted amazing as always. Somehow he felt a strange sense of homeliness whenever he ate Yao’s food. Their friendship had survived the past sixty years and throughout that time they had each other’s back. They had laughed and cried together.
Even though China was the older and more powerful of the duo Pakistan always treated him more like a friend than an elder. He had gotten to know him rather than assuming he was just some scary commie at his border.
"Let's be friends." was what the younger nation had proposed on their first meeting leading to a reaction of utter shock from Yao.
So alas despite being different in almost every aspect, Pakistan; young, brash and zealous to help others despite struggling himself, China meanwhile was more patient and wise yet exhausted by the long life he had lived. He preferred to observe first instead. They balanced out each other’s energy like yin and yang. This wasn’t to say they never disagreed with one another but they’d never let it come between their friendship. That was a given. No matter how dark the times each went through they would be there for each other.
Ahmed’s thoughts went to the time he was in deep shit, going through grievous sufferings all at once. First it was earthquakes followed by waves of terrorism and if that wasn’t enough there came floods. He was injured and subsequently fell ill. It was his lowest point and he didn’t think he’d make it…
November 2010
His entire body, every muscle ached deeply and despite the blanket he felt the shivers. The pain was so great it prevented him from thinking straight, his thoughts were jumbled up and he could not distinguish reality from the nightmares anymore. In fact the two had intertwined. In that bed with the cannula in his arm, the liquid in the IV dripping down drop by drop.
The scenes he had witnessed were stuck in his head, seeing his people injured, piles of dead bodies and endless coffins. A needless sacrifice. Fields destroyed, families separated and starving. Hospitals overrun with the injured and diseases that had spread in it's wake. Disaster was an understatement. Why him?
He only wished to scream loud but no sound came out. It was like he had numbed himself to the outside world. These emotions more than anything were a heavy burden to carry. So despite the storm that brewed in his mind he laid there in the barely lit room, quietly staring at the ceiling, a hopeless look in his bright colored eyes and tanned skin flushed crimson with fever.
The door creaked open and a figure entered. “Ahmed, how do you feel now?” a familiar voice asked.
Ahmed’s attention went towards the short, youthful looking Chinese man who was wearing a smile but the worry in his eyes was evident. “I feel like shit. Honestly.” He said bluntly, his voice sounding deeper and hoarse followed by a coughing fit. “Doctor said its pneumonia. I was out helping people during the flood.” Yao knew this wasn’t the truth; nations didn’t get sick until they were undergoing enormous devastation such as natural disaster or a plague. In Pakistan's case it was the floods. Oh well he hadn't been doing particularly great before that either. It was always one thing or the other.
“That’s why I always tell you to be careful!” he sighed deeply and furrowed his brows. “But do you youngsters really listen?”
“Okay mom.” He said softly. China hid his flustered face, he felt like laughing honestly. What a joker even serious illness wouldn’t hinder him. He had the ability to make jokes regardless of the situation, China thought he should have taken it more seriously but deep down even he applauded his resilience.
“Aghh it's not funny!” Yao face palmed. Did anyone take him seriously? “Anyways I made you some soup, hurry drink up!” he held out the bowl he was carefully carrying on the tray. "Careful it's hot."
“That’s… really thoughtful of you.” He managed to sit up in bed somehow but had another coughing fit. It took him a few moments to recompose himself, his forehead was covered in cold sweat and he looked like a mess overall. “Thanks.” He took the warm bowl from him and took a sip. “It’s really delicious.” Although he couldn’t taste a thing.
Yao touched his forehead and gasped. “You’re burning up so much.”
“I’m fine honestly.” He finished the soup and put the empty bowl aside on the wooden bedside table. He grabbed his knees close to his body and continued to shiver, it was hard to stop. “I-I think I’ll lie down now.” He rested his head against the pillow but it was pounding. He couldn’t sleep nor could he stay awake in peace, he only felt like slamming his head against the wall right now. It was best he rested. Yao was sitting on right next to him on the bedside his eyes full of concern.
“… Please pass me some painkillers and sleeping pills, they’re in that drawer.” He pointed towards his cupboard. Yao complied and went to fetch them and he found a drawer full of pills. “You take all of these?” he nearly gasped.
“Not all.” He took the jar which looked like it was full of colorful candy but it was full of various medicines. “I just keep that for emergencies.” He popped out two bright colored pills and swallowed them followed by a glass of water.
“…You shouldn’t just numb it out you know.” Yao blurted out but immediately regretted what he had said.
“Huh?” Ahmed raised an eyebrow.
“I-I mean you can vent out to me if you need to.” He quickly added. “Please don’t hesitate.”
“Thanks.” He gave a small smile and closed his eyes. All of a sudden there was a warm feeling inside of him, just knowing someone cared was enough and despite the darkness surrounding him he felt a flicker of hope. After all he had survived worse before. So he did something unexpected, he laid his head on Yao’s lap and warm tears flowed out of his eyes. He wasn’t sure if this was due to the brunt of the illness or his bottled up emotions but he felt relieved to have let it out. It felt lighter. He felt the man's soft fingers caress his face in response.
Yao was not the sole one to visit either. Turkey, Sadik Adnan also came. Ah his old role model, he had been in a situation similar to what he was during the collapse of the Ottoman Empire. Sickness and rampage, Poverty and ruin. He remembered the Turk sitting in a studio apartment at one point, surviving on bread and coffee.
“You helped me then so now it’s my turn.” Was what he said and gave him a bro fist. The fact that he had another shoulder to lean on made him feel slightly better.
...
Something he hadn’t ever expected was Ajay showing up. He stood outside his bedroom’s door for a few minutes, unsure whether it would be appropriate for him to enter. Yao who also stood near the lobby motioned him to go on in. Hesitantly he did, standing in the doorway until the occupant acknowledged him. Ahmed groggily got up to see who the figure standing in the dark was only to be taken aback when he saw him. India walked inside; his face was a mix of worry and confusion. “Oh uh hi.” He broke into an awkward smile as he pulled a nearby chair.
The two didn’t really make eye contact and just sat in silence for a while in the dark room. The dark, gloomy sky outside matched the mood inside.
“So how have you been faring?” he realized how dumb of a question that was, obviously he wasn’t doing well due to the natural disasters but he did not know how else to begin the conversation.
“I’ve been coping…” he replied although he still felt weak and feverish yet he wouldn’t express it to Ajay anyway. Over the years their trust decayed little by little until it reached the point of no return. While leaving home Ahmed, no Pakistan had said they would have good relations as neighbors but the tragedies that took place afterwards made it nearly impossible. All the wars, all the hurt they had inflicted on each other. It came back to haunt them every time they met.
Ajay only wished his little Ahmed back sometimes. Not Pakistan but that sniveling boy, who excitedly rambled on about how his day went and even told him the minor details. The boy who would cry to him snuggled tightly in his arms. Deep inside he wanted him to rant about how he did when he was sick or hurt. He knew it wouldn’t happen and one look at the other made him wonder if he was even the same person anymore. His eyes were different; there was a deeply pained look in them now. Ajay didn’t know how to talk to him anymore. He cleared his throat and composed himself.
“I heard that things were bad.” That was what he had heard from the news. The young nation seemed surrounded by problems yet he was ever so stubborn. It frustrated Ajay but perhaps this was to be expected, they were at each other's throats most of the time.
“They could be worse you know. “ Came a blunt reply accompanied by his signature poker face. Ah guarded as always. He never told him how he really felt but Ajay could tell that he was definitely not okay. He was barely holding himself together to sit up straight “You need not worry about me.” He looked away.
"Oh come on don’t be so stubborn like a child!” It seemed that Ajay had snapped. “All this time I fucking know you’ve been struggling. Why not be honest about it?” he stood up and the chair fell down behind him. “You could whine about it to me you know, you never do anymore.” He sighed and sat himself back down ashamed at his outburst. “Forget it.”
Pakistan’s face meanwhile was dumbfounded. “You… want me to cry to you?” he blinked. “Are you a sadist or something? Do you enjoy seeing me in pain?”
“Fuck you!” he cursed and face palmed, internally cursing himself for saying that. “You’re so annoying.”
“What’s your point?” Ahmed folded his arms and shot him a look.
“… Just let me know if there’s anything I can do.” Ajay said in a quiet voice, even if he was his enemy, his troublesome neighbor it couldn’t ever take away their centuries worth of shared past. At the end of the day they still had human emotions that went beyond their political relations and couldn’t help but be concerned for one another.
Ahmed was a bit touched he supposed but would he want his help? He wasn’t sure about that. It would be an insult to the injury which his boss and people wouldn’t really appreciate. “No it’s alright, you coming over to check on me is more than enough.” He finally broke into a small smile. It was the truth, they hardly visited each other despite being next door neighbors.
“Come on I make great food, better than your little friend there.” He smiled back cheekily, Even if it was for Pakistan he thought he could make China, his second regional rival jealous by cooking for him. “He isn’t feeding you grasshoppers, is he?” he whispered under his breath so Yao wouldn’t hear. “I can make you some amazing khichdi.”
“Whaaat? Nahi bhai.” Ahmed couldn’t help but burst into laughter until it turned into another coughing fit. It took him a while to recompose himself. “Ah excuse me… okay, I guess you could do that much.”
“Won’t poison it I promise!” He stood up happily; internally overjoyed that Pakistan had accepted his offer. With Yao in the kitchen the probability of him doing that was next to none. It wasn’t as if the poison would kill him but he didn’t want to get sicker either.
Present day
“Ahmed…? Ahmed!” Yao shook him by the shoulder.
“Oh. Er Yes?” He came out of his daze and looked at him; he was back in his living room. The rain still continued to drum outside. The two were sitting on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around them. The empty dumplings box was on the table in front of them.
“You seemed a bit zoned out, are you alright?” Yao asked with a concerned expression.
“I’m fine. It’s nothing.” He replied attempting to seem as calm as possible. “I was just thinking.”
“Oh I see, I was a bit worried.”
“Don’t be, I’m fine.” He repeated himself and leaned against his friend, he adored whatever calm moments he could get.
“I am glad.” And with that China did something unexpected, he leaned over, grabbed his face and softly kissed his forehead. “You know I am happy to see you doing well.” His voice was gentle.
Pakistan didn’t know how to respond to that, he was quite flustered. Deep down he knew he did face a million problems but at least he wasn’t at his lowest point yet. He was always under pressure yes but the few relaxing moments he could get, he cherished them dearly. He didn’t want to feel depressed and lonely again. Most of the world still looked at him as if he was crazy but at least he had a few who truly cared about him. He didn’t know what to do with these warm fuzzy feelings.
Their eyes met and next thing they knew Ahmed leaned in and they tasted each other's as they made out on the couch passionately. Arms wrapped around each other’s neck, savoring every second of that moment.