Chapter Text
The following is a non-profit +18 (Sorta) crossover fic. All art shown here is credited and any character in lewd situations is 18 and above. Please support the official releases of any franchises that come up.
Dedicated to the Silverscale Lounge and everybody who’s shown me and those around them a good time on F-List. Your feedback gives me life~
Somewhere in Deep Space, the Nintendo Universe…
“Ladies and gentlemen…” An electronically modulated voice spoke in a dimly lit room. The only light that shined in this wide but darkened space was that coming from a large screen, showing only the soundwaves of the voice while six figures sat around a large table in front of it. Each of them were hidden behind cloaks as the voice continued to speak.
“I declare this meeting open. You’re all probably wondering why I’ve gathered all of you after you were restored. We’re all united by our hatred. Our revenge. Our regret. The regret of having to taste the bitter feeling of defeat. Nobody knows that better than I do, but that doesn’t mean I’ve turned a blind eye to what befell you.”
Each of the figures had their own reactions while their leader drabbled on. The first of which narrowed his eyes, his thin frame digging claws into the table. “You, a disgraced and exiled warrior, met with the humiliation of losing to a lesser life-form, as well as becoming a glorified wall ornament.”
The next, the largest of them, clenched a servo while narrowing his optics, Null Rays glowing faintly while a Minicon on top of him nodded. “You, brought low by a mere monster, right as you almost achieved the power you deserved.”
And this would go on, with the next one idly stroking off her large cock, but staring holes of anger into the table. “You, who had ultimate power in her hands, ready to engulf all in your dominance until some furry bimbo ruined it.”
“You, who wants to be the idol of millions, but who lost his chance when everybody just gave you derision and mean comments, as well as the burning taste of defeat.” The hooded figure shook his leg while growling in anger.
“You, who tried to spread the good word of your franchise, but you weren’t just met with annoyance and idiocy, but the pain of losing to a powerful demon.” The winged hooded one clenched the weapon she had, hateful that she had been brought so low to this point.
“And you, whom almost had all the riches in the world, but were then met with a foul end.” Even the voice couldn’t help but chuckle at the shortest hooded one’s misfortune, much to that guy’s ire as he scratched his butt, still aching.
“I don’t think I need to elaborate any further. But as for my own fate…I can assure you that I’ve suffered the most. I intend to rectify the mistakes of the past and help us look to the future. For I have a plan. A plan that will ensure that we are avenged. More than that. That we become kings and queens. That everybody we’ve ever hated will be in our power.”
The Cybertronian stood up. “And just how do you intend to do so? I’ve been given a week off from my time back in my Universe, so make it quick.”
“Shut it, tin-can. I don’t care what I gotta do.” The she-male of the group warned. “I’d kill a whole damn world if it meant getting back at that bitch for ruining my life.”
“Feh. I just came for the snacks.” The shortest figure started snacking on the peppermints. “And revenge!”
“I’m sorry. Who invited this fool?” The slender male hooded one asked. “Just his mere presence is ruining this mysterious aura.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” The winged hooded one nodded. “But that doesn’t matter. I gleamed into what is in store for us. It may smell of deception and treachery…but I was forsaken. I’m willing to do anything.”
“Good. Glad we’re all on the same page now.” The voice spoke before six glowing multi-colored lights shined in front of them, dazzling them all. “See these? These are the keys to our victory. Something even the Arena couldn’t keep within. Soon, their full power will be in our grasp, unlocked and unleashed onto those we hate the most.”
“Then where do we start?” The Minicon within the Cybertronian exclaimed. “This is already sounding amazing and stupendous!”
The voice laughed a bit, as the lights formed an infinity symbol. “More than that…I’d prefer the term…INFINITE.”
(Dare-Stan Bush)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUhB1O8Le0Q
The Silverscale Lounge and Baskerra Hellmane proudly present…
The Silverscale Arena Movie
“Infinity Pizza”
A celebration of Season 1
Location: The Peach Creek Cul-De-Sac
Universe: Cartoon Network
Once more, the sun shined on this odd neighborhood. You all know it. Don’t lie. If you grew up during the early 2000s, you’d know what we mean. But we’re not here to dawdle. Right now, we’re about to begin the adventure that would decide the fate of not just this area, but the entire multiverse.
And it all began with a certain dullard slamming open the door to his house, nearly smashing it in two as he giddily leaped and bounded in the air. “Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Can’t wait, can’t wait, can’t WAIT!” He cried out, joy swelling in his heart.
This was Ed, the 12th winner of the Arena and long-time sufferer of it. Gone was the pain of having to deal with that madness and now, he could enjoy the comforts of his usual life. Only now, he had more reason to enjoy it. That’s what happens when you suddenly find yourself dating somebody who loves you for all your faults.
That was the subject of his joy. Within his hands was a poster he had been given by his date after making a visit to her world through the secret portal next to his house. His date being the demure high-school girl named Sakaki. The two made the strangest pair, as people from both universes would say. Both having gotten acquainted through the Arena, which, at this point, seemed to double as a match-making area, with just a hint of aphrodisiac helping the way.
In Ed’s universe, people he knew were still wrapping their heads around how he, of all people, managed to land a successful relationship. The only ones who fiercely objected were his mom (for racist reasons we can’t repeat) and May Kanker…for obvious reasons. In Sakaki’s universe, Tomo and the other knuckleheads couldn’t help but watch and see if this crashed/burned eventually.
And Kaorin was desperately trying not to show any signs of jealousy. But all of this can be saved for a different story. A different time. Right now, we need to get on with the plot.
Ed kept leaping and bounding, holding the poster to his chest, until he crashed into a stand, his face flopping onto the ground like a pancake. “Watch it, lumpy! That’s the second stand you splintered this week!” Eddy shouted, once again trying his best to fleece people out of a measly 25 cents.
“Could you two contain yourselves? I’m trying something.” Edd said while holding several different types of ferns to the mandibles of a strange new friend Ed had brought along from the Arena. Dora the Arthropleura was enjoying being studied by the nerdy one, as it meant she got free food. “I’m still trying to understand how she’s able to maintain this great size with the reduced oxygen levels here.”
“Who cares? We’ve probably got a billion piles of oxygen around here!” Eddy said before hoisting up his sign. “Right now, I’m trying to sucker some losers into our new ‘Belly-Button Searching Extravaganza’! Find out the mysteries within!”
Edd just face-palmed. “A solution: the oxygen’s all going to Dora’s giant frame and not our heads, much to my chagrin.”
“Guys! Guys! Look what Sakaki gave me!” Ed interrupted them all to show them the poster. It depicted several Japanese children holding kittens up above their heads.
Eddy grumbled something about a wasted opportunity involving Japan and Sumo Wrestlers before taking notice. “Don’t look at me! I don’t speak moonspeak!”
“Idle racism aside, I find myself struggling to understand. But I believe it has something to do with charity. I suppose that is something to be joyful about.” Edd said before Dora snapped her mandibles at the paper. “Hey! That’s not exactly the healthiest option!”
Ed nodded his head quickly. “Uh huh! The gravy to my ladle is giving out cash to those cute little kittens and I wanna help!” He smiled brightly. “She’ll be so happy when I give her all the cash~”
“Ugh. Don’t tell me. This is all about that girlfriend you won’t stop talking about.” Eddy groaned. “I’d be happy for you if you would not only shut up for once about her, but find your own cash. Any buck I make is mine and mine alone!”
“But Eddy…” Ed whined, waving the poster around.
“Quit it! I’m more of a dog person anyway.” Eddy dismissed him. “Now help me out. You’re the star attraction of my scam!”
“I believe showing concern for the welfare of homeless kittens is FAR more important than wasting it on yet another inane scheme that will certainly have ourselves pummeled by disappointed patrons.” Edd scolded. Even Dora was losing track of what he was saying, scuttling over to Ed.
Ed was looking a bit conflicted, looking to both Eddy’s unamused expression and the poster. “Um…uh…” He buried his hands into his pockets, only getting out lint and even a few nonsensical items, like an anvil, gum-crusted comic books, and an expired bag of chicken-feed.
“Urgh! Just drop it! Focus your pea-brain on what’s important! When you start raking in the dough like I’m gonna in a few years or less, THEN you can help whatever dime-a-dozen charity you can!” Eddy pulled Ed’s lip down to get him at eye-level, but then Ed’s head snapped back, causing it to move around so that it smacked Eddy into the ground.
The gears in Ed’s brain were moving at breakneck pace, every foolish thought coming to a crawl. He wanted to help the one he loved so much that even his love of chickens and comic books was being physically halted. That’s when the peanut-sized brain he had lit up like a light bulb.
“AH HAH! Today, Ed, the Super-Warrior and savior of Sakaki’s heart, will get a job!” He exclaimed.
“Ed, with all due respect…” Edd explained as he tried to pry Eddy off the ground like hot gum against the concrete. “…you have to have skills, a detailed resume, and a working education to achieve anything close to a fulfilling and well-paying job. You’ve already flunked high school ten times…somehow!”
“You really believe that baloney?” Eddy suddenly changed his tune, getting up and wrapping an arm around Ed. “Remember that time you worked for Rolf? You did a stand-up job! So…imagine getting a REAL job and raking in some cold hard cash?” Now Eddy’s devious brain was working. “You just gotta find someplace desperate for workers!”
“Desperation is, sadly, the only incentive to hire our poor Ed.” Edd sighed.
That’s when Ed hugged both his pals and Dora, crushing the three of them. “Hooray! I get to help everybody! I get a job, I get the money, Sakaki gets charity, we get jawbreakers, dad won’t complain about work, and everybody wins!” He dropped them as he put a finger to his chin. “Hmmmm…a firefighter!”
One hour later…
Ed sadly looked at his pink slip as Kevin’s house burned to the ground behind him. “But the black water was so strong!”
“For Heaven’s sake! That was oil you put in the hose!” Edd shouted, panicking at the raging fire, as well as Kevin beating up Eddy for hate’s sake.
The dullard went back to thinking. “Hmmmmmm…a policeman!”
Another hour later…
This time, his badge was being ripped out of his jacket, his lip quivering as Edd and Eddy followed him out of the station afterwards. “All because I was a big tattler!”
“To be fair, you DID manage to expose several accounts of inner corruption. A shame our law system has become so…distant from its lawful start.” Edd bemoaned.
“Aren’t cops supposed to protect people? What kind of bizarro world are we living in?!” Eddy blew a raspberry at those behind them.
“Hmmm…..” Ed thought harder this time. “Jawbreaker Factory Worker!”
That got both of his pals’ attention. “NOW you’re talking! Having one of our boys on the inside.” Eddy clasped his hands, chuckling. “No way can this go wrong!”
Yet another hour later…
Hospital rates went up suddenly, as reports came in of every single child within the Peach Creek area coming down with a litany of diseases yet unheard of. Side-effects included nausea, volcanic fever, incredible jitters, paranoia, terrifying hallucinations, a desire to worship something called ‘Acerabock the Chicken God’, among others.
All this happening after the new Jawbreaker inventory was given to the local Candy Store, all the stock instantly recalled and our hero being fired for having something to do with it. Maybe the fact that he ended up ‘taste-testing’ each one that was sent to the shelves.
Ed sadly sat on the steps to his house, looking at the poster, as well as photos of his friends in the hospital, suffering the effects of his mistake. “Not fair.” He could only say, only Dora staying by his side while he miserably mulled over things. That’s when he looked at his hand and clenched his fist, concentrating hard.
Nothing happened. He remembered that, during his last Arena bout, he had awakened a special instinct within himself. Something that was always with him, but never tapped to the level he felt against Ridley. Since then, he had been trying to tap into it multiple times, coming close when he felt a protective urge.
His idiot mind never gave him the ability to comprehend the true source of his power, which further left him depressed. “Excuse me, good sir…” An elderly voice got his attention.
“Huh?” He and Dora turned to an extremely old man using a walker. He was spindly and thin, with wilted skin and thick glasses. His floppy nose covered his mouth and his beard fell to his chest. “Are you the Ghost of Christmas Past?”
“No, sonny. This fanfic couldn’t be released on Christmas. I’m just a senior citizen with a lil’ offer for you.” The stranger chuckled. Ed had been told not to talk to strangers, but he was too nice to ignore this. “You looking for a job?”
“Would I?!” Ed stood up in excitement before slumping. “But I’ll just mess it up.”
“Mess up this?” A thin box was flung at Ed’s face. It was a red/white box with a picture of a pizza-slice over a nebula on the center. The smell of fresh melted cheese, crusty bread, and a multitude of other grand smells filled Ed’s nostrils.
He peeked at the inside of the box, his mouth drooling at the sight of a perfectly good mozzarella cheese pizza within. But on each of the six slices, there was a stone lodged within. They were purple, blue, red, orange, green, and yellow. They looked like average colored rocks, but what mattered to the dullard was what this meant.
“Pizza delivery! Ed will be the best delivery-boy in the history of the universe!” He exclaimed. “Right after I have a sample…”
“NO.” The old man slammed his walker against the guy’s head, leaving a comical indent as Dora loomed over, ready to bite into this stranger if he did anything else. “Don’t get so grabby, whippersnapper! I came from far away to give you an important message. A message that could mean an end to your troubles.”
“A quest? I’m listening.” Ed was getting more excited as this went along.
The old man stepped back, getting a strange remote from his back-pocket. It looked like an average TV-remote, with prongs attached at the end. “There’s a secret ingredient to this pizza that’s very important. An ingredient that this device will tell you how to obtain after you finish this first task.”
Ed continued to listen with rapt attention, sitting on Dora’s back as the Arthropleura circled this stranger. “Through this device, you will find 11 others. Some you might find familiar. Others, you would have not met yet. Either way, they are the key to this successful delivery. One that must be completed in 48 hours or less. Succeed…and the riches will be endless!”
Instantly, the dullard shook the hand of the feeble man. “Deal! I’m as fast as a turnip and as strong as a beet! Ed, Super-Warrior, will get it done! For Eddy! For Double-D! For Sakaki! For the kittens!”
“That means now.” The man shoved the box into Ed’s arms. “Use the remote to transport yourself to the location of these people. When they are all gathered, the remote will give you further instructions. Instructions that involve those stones within. Which you must NEVER touch until the time is right. Got it, sonny?!”
Ed nodded quickly, his brain struggling to remember these basic bits of information, as well as trying not to be distracted by little details like how that beard kept collecting dirt and dust on the ground. “Uh huh. Aye aye, captain!” He saluted.
“Good. I promise you won’t regret this! Remember! Think of everybody you’ll be letting down if this doesn’t go to plan.” The Old Man warned before he started to vanish. “I must go! My people are calling me! Remember, Ed! You’re the customer’s only hope!” With that, he was gone.
A portal emerged before the dullard, swirling green energy crackling out of the vortex. Dora let out a chittering noise in protest. “It’s okay, Dora. I will return with enough money to help everyone! Ed is on the case! For he has…” He gave a dramatic pause before rushing into the rapidly closing portal.
“PIZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA….”
Even a creature like Dora had a feeling this wasn’t going to end well, but she just got back onto her legs, scuttling away to probably pester Sarah and Jimmy again.