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Chen Yuzhi, in all his almost 30 years of life, has never been in this much of a predicament.
“Well, Xiao Bai,” Yuzhi exhales, looking back and forth between the camera and the innocent-looking cat laying on the floor, fur dyed in various shades of powder, remnants of broken eye-shadow palettes scattered about. “You’re gonna have to explain this to Keying.”
Xiao Bai mews just as innocently as he looks. Yuzhi sighs.
Suddenly, everything fast-forwards.
It stops and starts once again back at Chen Yuzhi’s face, grinning widely and charmingly handsome as always. Anyone could practically feel the warmth radiating from his presence even through video alone.
“Hello!” he greets happily, “It’s your weekly check-up with me, Dr. Chen! This week isn’t gonna be a health check-up, nope! I have with me here, Xiao Bai~” he adjusts the camera angle downwards, and in his other hand not occupied with the camera, Xiao Bai is caught in the frame.
A caption appears reading, “The culprit of a disaster.”
He mews lowly. Yuzhi harrumphs.
“Don’t be all mopey with me, young man. You’re grounded and revoked from any special treats for the rest of the week. It’s what you get for destroying Keying’s make-up.”
Xiao Bai mews guiltily, and Yuzhi lets him go after the scolding.
He sighs into the camera once more, “As you saw from the beginning of the video, my husband’s naughty cat snuck into Keying’s room and messed around with her eye-shadow palette. I cleaned him up, but if you saw, his fur became more vibrant than the pride flag,” he chuckles, amused, “Keying is a sweet girl, but I’d hate to get on her bad side. So today, we’re gonna go shopping to replace her make-up!”
The video cuts to Yuzhi getting ready, his signature white trench coat already wrapped around his slender form above a snazzy three-piece cream suit. The caption in the video says, “Dress to impress!”
“I’m gonna be honest,” Yuzhi’s voice echoes in the bathroom he was in, the camera angled at a low view that frames his upper body and the rich-looking shower behind him, “I have absolutely no idea what make-up is about, so think of this video as a doctor’s blind make-up shopping spree, okay?”
He picks up the camera, checking his hair and dusting his outfit for a final touch up, deeming himself satisfied, “According to Chu Ran, make-up is expensive though, so I hope I can find some good quality brands perfect for Keying. Her birthday is soon, so this could be an early gift? Sure hope she likes it.” He grabs his things, walking out of the bathroom smiling.
“To the mall!”
-
The video transitions quickly from Yuzhi driving in his car on his way to a nearby mall and stops when he’s seen in a cosmetics store, looking at two eye-shadow palettes with sheer confusion, as if he were trying to differentiate between the two very identical looking palettes.
(What he didn’t read was the label below the palettes reading ‘Highlighter’ and ‘Face Powder’. He’s truly at a loss.)
“So, uh…” he gulps, squinting his eyes at the cosmetics quite hard, “I didn’t think this through.”
A caption appears saying “Yeah, clearly.”
Yuzhi laughs nervously, sucking air through his clenched teeth awkwardly, blinking repeatedly at the products, “Do I buy both? Would Keying be okay with that? This one is cheaper,” he holds up the left one, showing it to the camera. The background blurs as the camera focuses on the palette – but then Yuzhi pulls back, his eyes having caught the label in the back of palette.
“Oh—“ he bursts out laughing, shaking his head. “My bad, my bad… ahh..” he proceeds to read both labels this time, only to groan silently. “I don’t know what’s the difference between highlighters and powders. Isn’t that the same thing? Why does this look like glitter? Is that what it is?”
The video cues edited ‘booing’ background noise at Yuzhi’s questions. He laughs breathlessly knowing full well he sucks at this.
He reaches into his pocket, shaking his head again, “I’m gonna need a professional’s help.”
-
The video cuts to Yuzhi still, this time the caption reading ‘Fifteen minutes later’ and soon, another famous YouTuber appears.
“Hello~” Yu Tangchun greets into the camera merrily, pulling Yuzhi into a hug, “Apparently, an emergency call in the middle of a dry rehearsal was the last thing I expected today.”
Yuzhi winces, “Sorry…”
Yu Tangchun laughs, waving off the apology, “Nonsense, Yuzhi. I’m happy to help.”
The doctor smiles, then addresses the camera, “Yet another video with the famous opera singer and popular beauty YouTuber. I bet my subscribers are happy to see you back.”
“Well, it’s certainly been a while,” Tangchun waves at the camera, “Don’t worry you all, I’ll save Dr. Chen here who—“ his eyes land at the mess of cosmetic products on the counter, scattered randomly, “—apparently can’t tell between a highlighter and face powder to save his life.”
Yuzhi scoffs, “I tried! The clerk tried to explain things but it’s far too confusing for my brain capacity. You’re an expert with this stuff, oh wise beauty guru, Mister Yu,” he bows teasingly, eliciting another mirthful laugh from Tangchun.
“Oh stop it, you flatter me, Yuzhi. Come then, let’s start with what contour Keying uses.”
Yuzhi blinks, confusion etched on his features for the nth time that day, “Contour?”
Yu Tangchun nods, organizing the cosmetics.
“…what is that?”
“Oh lord.”
-
Skipping to the end of the shopping session, Yuzhi and Tangchun walk out of the store, the latter carrying his own fair share of cosmetic products bought in a large shopping bag.
“—And remember, make sure she tests them out first just in case her skin might get rashes or allergic reactions. The formulas for these things work depending on the sensitivity of the skin,” explains Tangchun as they walk out together, Yuzhi holding the camera whilst laughing and nodding.
“Oh, and do keep them out of reach from Xiao Bai. Dear Keying needs a taller vanity if an incident like this happens again.”
Yuzhi laughs again, “I think I’ve spent enough money today. Don’t want the Chief hauling my ass home if he finds out I’ve spent more than I should’ve.”
Tangchun snorts, “Chief Jiang would be fine with it. Was he not the one who designed the gorgeous wooden sign for your clinic?” he nudges the doctor, whose ears turn red.
“You kept this info from me too! I didn’t even find that out until a year after my clinic opened. That man and his romantic gestures…”
Tangchun giggles, “My point is, Jiang Yuelou would probably build a taller vanity should you ask him to. No need to spend extra money for it.”
“No way,” Yuzhi scoffs, “If it’s within his capabilities, he’ll make it a little more extravagant than necessary. He spoils both Keying and Xiao Bai like they’re our children.”
Yu Tangchun hums, walking alongside Yuzhi around the mall together, looking thoughtful, “Have you thought about that?”
The doctor freezes, and the video begins closing in on Yuzhi’s face for comedic effect. Tangchun purses his lips that were about to laugh when the doctor looks in his direction, unblinking.
“…about what?”
“Don’t play dumb, Yuzhi,” Tangchun grins, then proceeds to take the camera from him, smiling mischievously; Yuzhi has a bad feeling…
“What do you guys think? Should the Killer and Healer have their own mini—“ the video cuts, static shown on screen.
It reverts back to normal and the video shows Yuzhi, with read ears still, smiling in satisfaction whilst Yu Tangchun is clearing his throat. The caption below reads, “Nothing to see here.”
“Well, I do say it’s about time I leave,” Tangchun says, smiling politely. It was obvious he was straining himself from smiling harder than necessary.
Yuzhi nods vehemently, “Yes, yes. Thank you for your help today, Tangchun. I would’ve remained in this mall for far too long and would most likely have bought the entire store if you didn’t show up.”
“Oh please,” Tangchun chuckles, “If you called your husband, he would have bought the store anyway. And I’m happy to help, Yuzhi. Just remember what I told you.”
Yuzhi is nodding absentmindedly, “Yes, yes, tell Keying to test out the products—“
“I meant the other thing.”
The doctor grows silent, and when things became awkward save for Yu Tangchun’s snorts, Yuzhi clears his throat, “Okayyy, I’m leaving now. Goodbye, Tangchun~” he bids quickly, earning an offended squawk from his friend.
They part ways by the escalator, with Yuzhi heading down to the ground floor carpark when he stops – eyes spotting something in the far distance.
He gasps, and ditches the initial idea of heading further down, instead taking another direction, ending up in another store entirely.
A store filled with vintage antiques.
A caption appears, “Somebody call Chief Jiang!”
(Every subscriber of the Killer and Healer channel know damn well what exactly is Dr. Chen Yuzhi’s list of weaknesses, and the fifth one on the list is gloriously vintage antiques that only people with acquired taste would like. Dr. Chen’s husband has warned them very sternly that if Yuzhi were to encounter any vintage item with some high price in the markets be it online or in stores, both their wallets are in grave danger.)
“Ohhh, that’s a beautiful record player!” Yuzhi looks around the store with shiny, wondrous eyes that tell the viewers he might just rob the store in seconds (despite the fact that his husband is a literal police chief who would absolutely disapprove of him even walking into this store).
Yuzhi gasps again when his eyes wander to another object of interest, his professional eyes that everyone usually sees is calm, warm and soft now evidently sparking with excitement.
He points the camera around, and the video closes in focus on a beautifully designed leather suitcase sitting on display. Exclamation mark edits were present in different directions in the video indicating a very alarming action Chen Yuzhi was about to do.
He points the camera back to himself, smiling sheepishly, “Yuelou wouldn’t reprimand me for buying that, would he? It’s perfect for my medical equipment. It fits my aesthetic too!” he’s convincing the camera – his viewers, really.
He bites his lower lip, restraining himself, “I shouldn’t.”
The video cuts off from there, a black screen and suspenseful music playing in the background. Captions appear, reading “I bought it.”
-
Over a year ago, a YouTube Live starts from the Killer and Healer channel. The title reads, ‘The Story of Us.’
Chen Yuzhi appears on screen, sitting elegantly on his living room couch. Beside him is his husband, Jiang Yuelou, smirking at the camera. He has an arm around Yuzhi, legs crossed and sitting quite leisurely compared to his husband.
“Hello everyone~! Surprised to see us?” Yuzhi greets mirthfully, smiling sheepishly. “It’s not your weekly check-up with Dr. Chen today, oh no. By popular demand and from surprisingly observant fans, we’ve decided to hold a live Q&A session on the channel! Yuelou, say hi!” he nudges his husband.
Jiang Yuelou scoffs, but tips his head as a nod of acknowledgement. Yuzhi huffs.
“Come on, we're both going to talk here! Sit up so the fans can see you!” he urges.
Yuelou rolls his eyes good-naturedly, “Yuzhi, it’s just a livestream, this won’t be different from any of the other videos we’ve done. Especially since some of them where I was literally half naked—“
Yuzhi’s hands fly up to cover Yuelou’s mouth so fast, it physically pushes his husband against the couch. The doctor laughs nervously, “Anywayyyy, we titled the livestream ‘The Story of Us’ ‘cause I can already see some questions piling up in the live chat asking about how we first met!” he moves forward to adjust the camera, zooming in closer to his and Yuelou’s faces.
Yuelou clears his throat, shifting closer to Yuzhi, “How we met, huh? Pretty sure the first time I met you, I was… investigating the biggest drug-dealing case in Jing City.” He chuckles, eying the camera knowingly, gaining Yuzhi’s attention, “and Dr. Chen got involved in it.”
The doctor smacks him, “I was not!” he refutes, then looks directly at the camera, “I accidentally got involved and Chief Jiang here mistakenly arrested me for it.”
“I’ve asked this before and I’ll ask it as many times as I can, my dear Yuzhi, who the hell treats the wounds of drug dealers during the middle of a heist like that? They could’ve killed you!” Yuelou pinches the doctor’s ear, earning a frown of irritation.
“I told you already, they cornered me! They would’ve killed me if I didn’t help them! Besides, a doctor’s job is to heal, not to kill, Mr. Killer.”
The chief sits up suddenly, squinting his eyes at the camera, and must be reading a monitor for the live chat since he smirks at a particular question, “And that, BabyHealer42, is why our channel’s name is Killer and Healer,” he says cheekily, “Also, the story of how we met is gonna take over a day or two to explain. You guys have no idea how long it took for me to steal this man’s heart,” he jabs a thumb in the doctor’s direction, who flushes at the claim. “So maybe we can make another video about that some other time.”
“No way!” Yuzhi disagrees, “this livestream is it, Yuelou! We can just explain more if another question pops up!’
Yuelou raises an eyebrow, his eyes scanning the rushing live chat pointedly, “You wanna tell about the time Chu Ran set us up on a blind date together and that’s how we ended up dating?”
Yuzhi gapes, “I mean… that was only because we thought she had a crush on either one of us!”
“Yeahhh, awkward time for all three of us. Pretty funny though,” the chief sits back against the sofa, his arm, as usual, going around Yuzhi’s form to shamelessly pull him close, “If I recall, you were insistent in telling me to take the offer, but then you became far more jealous than a lady catching her man being flirted on by other women. You spilled her wine and even lied about the grilled chicken just so she was disgusted. Had the audacity to be embarrassed and flustered over causing such a scene. It was quite the memory.”
“Why would you tell them that?” whines Yuzhi, sighing in exasperation.
“You want this livestream to be about our story? This is where we share embarrassing memories, my doctor.”
A moment of silence, then suddenly, Yuzhi snorts, smirking, “You wanna talk about jealous? How about the time Jin Dacheng stood next to me and you punched him for it?”
Jiang Yuelou’s smug expression immediately disappeared at the mention of his co-worker, “Of all people—“
“Don’t deny it,” Yuzhi teases, grinning madly, “you assigned him as my bodyguard that day. Think it was during the church assassination attempt against me ‘cause they were trying to get to you? Sure he hated it, but Jin-daren was doing a pretty good job. Yet, every time he was barely a foot away from me, you were already breathing down his neck. I swear, he wanted to resign right there.”
“As he should, for making fun of me and hurting you at some point…”
Yuzhi smacks him again.
“Ow! Yuzhi!”
The doctor rolls his eyes, “Water under the bridge, Chief Jiang.”
Yuelou turns away, petulant, “Not my bridge…” he mutters lowly.
“What was that?”
Yuelou moves forward, eyes back on the monitor, “Nothing. Anyways, next question…” he skims through the millions of comments from their subscribers, finding anything worth addressing.
“From AllmyLove, ’I know there was video footage, but what was the wedding like in your points of views?’ Ah, that one wasn’t peaceful either..”
Yuzhi bristles, “Nothing is ever peaceful with us.”
Yuelou pats his husband’s knee, his fingers creeping over to wrap around the doctor’s hand, intertwining their hands together because he was smooth like that, “No, it’s not. But our wedding was…”
“Chaotic? A disaster? One of the most destructive days of our lives?” Yuzhi tries.
Jiang Yuelou glances at him, a smile stretching on his features, soft and smitten – he’s looking at the doctor with so much love, it has the live chat screaming in silence.
Smoothly, once again, he swipes Yuzhi’s hand upwards into his grip, and lifts it up to press his lips at the back of Yuzhi’s palm, “It was actually the best day of my life.”
- (It was a disaster. Everyone knew it) –
(There wasn’t anything that went right except for the fact that they got married in the end. First of all, it was Executive Zhan Junbai who volunteered to pay for everything all because Yu Tangchun got permission from Yuzhi to plan the wedding. Til this day, Yuzhi half regrets allowing it.
Second of all, it was supposed to be a small wedding. Simple, beautiful and filled with family and friends. Keying was their adorable and only flower girl, dressed so freaking cute it almost made Yuzhi pass out. Chu Ran threatened both grooms that if she didn’t help with the wedding preparations, they’d be feasting in a dungeon. Both Song Rong, Sun Yongren and even Jin Dacheng fought over who was going to be Yuelou’s best man – while nobody else denied Yu Tangchun for his request to be Yuzhi’s one. And, per Yuelou’s request, Xiao Bai was supposed to be the ring bearer.
As one can imagine, it all erupted into chaos with the ring bearer.
At his cue to enter, Xiao Bai chased after a butterfly with the rings around his neck and caused a series of screeches from the women present when he ran around them, tipped over half the delicate furniture that was chosen by Yu Tangchun and set off flying most of the bouquet of flowers lined up on the guests’ tables. Flower petals were spread everywhere and despite the beautiful scenery it painted – as well as a gorgeous picture Chu Min caught that’s been framed up in the Jiang-Chen household living room – the chaos didn’t end there.
Because it was Executive Zhan who paid for the expenses, one can imagine the extravagance he tried persuading to be done for Jiang Yuelou. It stressed the man out for months to the point Yuelou almost considered murder like he always does as a first priority when apprehending criminals – or people who annoy him.
Following this insistence of overspending for a small wedding, Executive Zhan went ahead and bought a 5ft sized cake taller than Keying, his reason being, “All the weddings I’ve been to have served cakes larger than this. This is merely a generous offer, barely a dent in my wallet.”
Yuzhi had to physically restrain his husband-to-be from killing someone in broad daylight in the morning on their wedding day.
Anyway, the actual chaos that happened from this is after everyone had collected themselves and realized the mess that had befallen around them was because of Xiao Bai. Executive Zhan just had to open his damn mouth and quip, “I knew we should have hired a trained feline.”
Jiang Yuelou was known for his impatience and flourishing professionalism as a chief, but lord was he not-so-professional when he carved out a giant ass cake piece with his entire hand from the giant ass wedding dessert and threw it square in Executive Zhan’s face.
Nobody could stop the disorder that followed after; the Chu siblings each carved out a piece of their own from the cake and threw it in random directions – hitting Keying and Jin Dacheng. And because Keying was a playful child, she threw a piece too, and because Jin Dacheng was a competitive person, he also threw a piece. Things escalated further and soon, everyone was in a food-fighting frenzy; icing, cream, bread… a massive mess was the hall by the end of the day.
The last honorary pieces of cake were tossed in Jiang Yuelou and Chen Yuzhi’s direction after they had finally managed to say their vows through all the belly laughter that took place. Their kiss was sweet – buttercream and blueberry. Yuelou, ever the shameless man he is, couldn’t let up from eating Yuzhi’s face that was smeared with cake. It left him a blushing mess more than the hall had become of.
Yuzhi also might have lost his shit over the ordeal when the wedding euphoria wore off, but Yuelou had never smiled that much in his life.
He had never been happier in his life being married to the man he loved so much, surrounded by the people who were there to witness the union, who took the time to help them set the event, to ensure everything was perfect, and ultimately enjoyed themselves even when it wasn’t.
It truly was the best day of his life.)
-
“At least admit it was a disaster,” Yuzhi eyes him, an eyebrow raised.
Yuelou chuckles, “Yes, yes, it was,” he admits, “But it was a perfect disaster. And I wouldn’t have it any other way, my Yuzhi.”
Predictably, Yuzhi’s ears turn red. He ducks his head down, smiling sweetly. He doesn’t let go of Yuelou’s grip, however, and proceeds with the livestream.
“Anyways! Next question!”
They both lean forward to read the monitor together, skimming through the comments of many, many questions. For several minutes, they take turns answering questions, laughing and joking around, occasional flirting here and there while at it because they’re husbands and they’re absolutely allowed to do this whilst Keying wasn’t home.
“From K&H4ever, ’What made Dr. Chen so attractive to you that it made you fall in love, Chief Jiang?’” Yuzhi reads aloud at some point, amused and curious all the same, looking at his husband expectantly.
Yuelou scoffs, tilting his head to the side cockily, “Ridiculous question. Far too easy, give me harder ones.”
Yuzhi laughs. He leans against the chief playfully, nuzzling his neck with his nose affectionately, “If it’s easy, why aren’t you answering?” he teases, “Was it my good looks? My determination to prove you wrong when it came to petty arguments about treating patients? You were such a cold man, so serious all the time. It was pretty hot.”
“Oh?” that catches Yuelou’s attention, snaking an arm around Yuzhi’s waist, “is that what you found attractive of me?”
The doctor grins, “The question was directed to you first, Chief Jiang.”
With an eyeroll and a sigh, Yuelou complies, “I suppose what I found attractive of my husband was his tendency to do impulsive things that always puts him in danger. Like treating a drug dealer’s wounds—“
Yuzhi moves away from him, laughing all over again, “You’re never gonna let that go, are you?”
“Never, my dear doctor,” says Yuelou. He scoots close to his husband again, reaching a hand up to caress Yuzhi’s face, smoothing down the stray hairs of the doctor’s usually neatly-combed hair (he dresses so sophisticated every day whether at home or going out, it’s absolutely unfair to look that good with such a naturally handsome face. Yuzhi likes staying neat, and that happens to be another attractive feature that Yuelou loves).
“What I’m trying to say is… it’s your compassion to help people regardless of who they are that made me so gone for you, Yuzhi,” the chief whispers, his fingers hooking beneath the doctor’s chin, bringing his face up to Yuelou can place a soft, warm peck on his cheek, “It’s so attractive that half the time, I wish you would stop being so selfless and just take care of me all day instead of anyone else.”
Yuzhi raises another curious eyebrow, “Is that so? How will I take care of myself then? And Keying?”
Yuelou chuckles, warm and happy, “Silly, that’s what I’m here for.”
Perhaps everyone watching the livestream can feel the warmth that blooms in Yuzhi’s heart from his husband’s words, seeing as his face was as red as his ears too.
“And what of me, Dr. Chen?” Yuelou asks smugly, his signature smirk ever-present. “What did you find attractive of me that made you fall in love?”
Yuzhi’s lips form a small, loving smile. He wraps his arms around Yuelou’s shoulders, both of them instinctively leaning forward together to press their foreheads against each other.
In the silence, Yuzhi whispers, “Your short height.”
And if he gets attacked with tickles against his side and aggressive kisses as a result for the rest of the livestream, every subscriber present watching think collectively that he deserves it.
-
“Keying, I want you to be completely honest with me,” Yuzhi annunciates each word as coherently as possible a little too patronizingly for Keying’s liking.
“Are you okay with calling Yuelou ‘Gege’ too?”
Keying stares at him for what feels like the longest minute possible – until her head turns over to eye directly into the camera, an exasperated look on her features.
The video cuts to said preteen sitting in her room, bearing the same exasperated face when she was with her brother, “I literally call both of them ‘Gege’. I think Yuzhi-ge is just worried Yuelou-ge will steal his position as best big brother,” she shakes her head, sighing dramatically, “Wait till he finds out my favourite Gege is actually Min-ge.”
-
“I actually think half the time Dr. Chen can top Chief Jiang,” Jin Dacheng says, in his own designated office, casually sitting whilst looking into the camera leisurely. “Like, there’s literally only one man who can tame the beast known as Jiang Yuelou and that happens to be the local doctor down the street. So you’d think if they were in the privacy of their own home, Dr. Chen would be the one in control.”
“Excuse me? Boss would top Dr. Chen and wouldn’t falter in the slightest.” Sun Yongren argues, the camera panning to him quickly. He and Song Rong were in the office too, leaning against the doorway with crossed arms and wearing identical frowns.
Jin Dacheng is heard spluttering, “The hell are you two doing here?”
Yongren ignores him in favor of addressing the camera, “Let me tell you people; every single day in the bureau, Boss will have at least one or two or three hours of a tantrum just because he doesn’t see Dr. Chen or if he doesn’t receive a text from him for a hot minute or simply because he wasn’t breathing the same air as him in the same room at that moment—“
“Yongren!” Song Rong elbows him, chastening.
“—he just has this lustful look in his eyes that screams, “I want my husband and I’ll murder the next person who touches me if it’s not him.” It’s so scary—“
Song Rong sighs. Jin Dacheng casts both of them a sneer. “Why exactly do you decide to butt in during my time to shine in this interview?” he complains.
“I never get a chance to appear on Boss and Dr. Chen’s YouTube channel! It’s unfair! Even Song Rong appears more than usual!”
Song Rong’s face morphs into offense, “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Yongren harrumphs at him, “I’m clearly left out.”
“That sounds like a you-problem,” Jin Dacheng deadpans, “also, have you seen Dr. Chen when he’s angry? He has the wrath of a god that could have me complying to his orders if he wants. Chief Jiang should watch out, that local doctor might take over his position.”
“Honestly, I wouldn’t doubt that possibility,” Song Rong admits – he pretends not to notice Sun Yongren’s own offending look directed at him, “Dr. Chen’s surprisingly good at giving orders and fighting when needed. I wouldn’t even be surprised if Boss steps down from Chief and gives it up to his own husband. Isn’t there a thing about how it’s not the boss of the company that workers need to watch out for, but the boss’s wife?”
“That’s literally what I’ve been saying!” Jin Dacheng scoffs smugly, “You've reinforced my point, Song Rong.”
“So we’re comparing Dr. Chen as Boss’s wife now? You both are basically saying he’s the bottom!” Yongren counters.
“Not really a wife, more like… an Alpha Wife? Whatever he wants to be called, it’s up to Dr. Chen,” Song Rong shrugs.
Jin Dacheng nods, “Precisely. It’s also why we, in the bureau, have to watch out whenever Dr. Chen comes storming into the station with a murderous look in his eyes. Worst case scenario, he’s about to kill Chief Jiang and we’ll all have our satisfactory answers over who tops and who bottoms.”
Both Song Rong and Sun Yongren exchange glances momentarily, and ultimately end up nodding in unison and agreement.
The camera zooms out from the three of them, and swiftly turns around to the holder, who turns out to be Keying. Her face says it all; disappointed but not surprised. It’s an exact replica of Jiang Yuelou’s and Chen Yuzhi’s.
“I asked them if they wanted to come for the banquet this Saturday for my birthday party but I guess not.” She deadpans, and before she closes the camera, she adds, “For the record, Gege could totally top Yuelou-ge if he wanted. I would know since I almost walk in on them at least three times a week.”
-
Chen Yuzhi ✔ @TheKillersHealer
So, I may or may not have made another impulsive purchase that was definitely worth it. It’s beautiful and vintage and qualifies as an item of need in my list. It is mine now.
#pleasedonttellmyhusband
[image]
(image description: Yuzhi adorably hugging the vintage suitcase he was eying in the antique store.)
Lillith :3 @BabyHealer42
@TheKillersHealer the second you said “vintage” we all knew it was over
Chu Ran @YourDailyReporter
@TheKillersHealer Oh boy Yuzhi, why would you post this
Z&Yu Tangchun ✔ @YTC
@TheKillersHealer I left you alone five minutes ago. How did this happen
Fatty is I @SYongren
@TheKillersHealer that looks expensive as hell so I’m ratting you out, I’m sorry Dr. Chen
@TheHealersKiller
Chen Yuzhi ✔ @TheKillersHealer
@SYongren traitor
Jiang Yuelou ✔ @TheHealersKiller
@TheKillersHealer … Yuzhi.
Lillith :3 @BabyHealer42
@TheKillersHealer Ohhhhhhhh snap, someone’s in troubleeee
-
Anonymous
Can someone explain to me briefly who the Killer and Healer are (or is?) and why they’re called that? Are they an actual murderer and healer duo or am I missing something?? Asking for research purposes cause I’m seeing them everywhere on my feed.
Anonymous
Allow me to explain:
The Killer and Healer are an iconic YouTube power couple consisting of Jiang Yuelou, the Chief police officer of the Jing City Bureau (like, he’s a real cop) and Dr. Chen Yuzhi, a popular local doctor in Jing City who owns a clinic called Yuzhi Hall (he’s an actual doctor too).
Dr. Chen has had a youtube channel long before they started dating, but he mainly used it for educational purposes. It was called ‘The Healer’ bc yk, he heals people. He became popular when he began narrating stories of the patients he was treating. He kept the names anonymous, but some of them were supposedly drug dealers and just some generally bad people. It became quite controversial.
If anyone is familiar with the big drug-dealing cases that went on in Jing City over a few years ago, then yall also would’ve known that it was Chief Jiang investigating it. He was known for being ruthless and skillful with weapons, so he was nicknamed “The Killer” by the people around him, even Dr. Chen’s fans. He couldn’t catch any leads cause these were some slippery people he was chasing after, so when he found out Dr. Chen was supposedly treating some of those drug dealers, he arrested him by accident. That’s how they met.
They’re pretty much like, the most opposite of opposites. Chief Jiang took his cases and his job so seriously, he wouldn’t think of sparing anyone, while Dr. Chen cared about every life that was in danger, so they clashed a lot. It took a while but somehow they jumped from sort-of-enemies to close besties? Dr. Chen started helping Chief Jiang with the cases and they even caught some of the dens the drugs were being smuggled in. It was great, they rose to fame in name and became a known duo in Jing City. Lot of drama went down tho, but they pulled through and its all just SO FREAKING ROMANTIC.
When they announced they were dating, Dr. Chen started posting on youtube again with Chief Jiang popping up around it was all so domestic that they started getting well-known everywhereee. They changed Dr. Chen’s channel to ‘Killer and Healer’ and BOOM! You go from a professional partnership of dangerous occupations to domestic youtuber husbands~
Anonymous
I… asked for brief but holy s h i t
-
“Hello, and welcome to your weekly check-up with me, Dr. Chen!” Yuzhi’s face pops up in another video, this time the title being ‘Acupuncture On My Husband’. “If you saw the title, I’m doing exactly as it says. Yuelou’s here and ready for the session~”
Jiang Yuelou was, in fact, sitting behind Yuzhi, shirtless and looking quite exhausted. He waved tiredly regardless, smiling when Yuzhi panned the camera on him.
“He’s been feeling exhausted lately with all the work piles happening at the bureau. Sitting stiffly in his office for hours doing unwanted paperwork is bad for his bones amd joints And with his added stubbornness, he refused to rest even with everyone’s insistence.”
Yuelou grumbles, “I was almost done with everything when you, Song Rong and even Keying dragged my ass out of my office.”
“Hush,” scolds Yuzhi, making his around his office. He pushes Yuelou down on the bed, leaning down briefly to peck the officer’s cheek, “I can’t believe you never considered getting acupuncture before. What stopped you?”
Happy with the kiss, Yuelou complies and obediently lies down on his stomach, his muscle-toned back in clear view of the camera which was already great content. “My work pile was worse years before this, Yuzhi. I simply didn’t have time to rest more back then than I have the time now.”
Yuzhi hums, then chuckles, “Ah, I bet you were the most ruthless officer in the bureau back then. A week of no sleep and the paperwork was far more vicious than the ones scattered in your office right now,” he shakes his head, walking back around to get to work, “no matter of that, then. I’m here.”
Even from the camera angle of the video, anyone could easily spot the charming smile of Yuelou’s from where he lay in his folded arms, tilting his head to eye over at Yuzhi, “Damn right, my Yuzhi.”
He gets rewarded with another peck when Yuzhi returns with the acupuncture needles, ready to get started.
“Alright, just rest easy, think of something soothing. This is supposed to help you relax. I mean, look at this,” Yuzhi places his hands on his husband’s back, pressing down on certain joints that make the man wince and grunt.
Yuzhi clicks his tongue, “You’re a cop, Yuelou. You’re gonna need your joints to be up and active when you chase after new criminals and cases.” He begins the session, pressing his fingers expertly against Yuelou’s back, easing the man to relieve his tense muscles. One by one, he slowly punctures the needles into the skin of the chief’s back.
“Yes, Yuzhi, I understand~” Yuelou breathes out, whether teasingly or not, he sounded relieved. His body is practically melting into the mattress.
The rest of the session has Yuzhi demonstrating and explaining how acupuncture is done for the video. Yuelou listens, soothed by his husband’s educational lessons whilst being soothed physically by said husband and his expert hands. Viewers watching could just tell how safe the chief feels in the care of his compassionate doctor.
It’s what people tend to overlook when it comes to stanning the YouTuber husbands. One would assume it was Jiang Yuelou who was responsible for protecting his family; he had a husband who occasionally helped him with his cases and often treated his wounds, he had his young sister-in-law, Keying, whom everyone tried to make sure would not get involved with her brothers’ works (despite that one time she almost got kidnapped. Nobody responsible for it was left alive), he had many other people in his life he had to look after.
But the stress of the job slowly got to him, and it can become too much to the point that he might not even think it was worth it to continue bringing the people loves in danger all the time.
Nobody stopped to consider what Chen Yuzhi had to offer more than his medical abilities. He had this; this calming aura he went everywhere with that made anyone feel safe, protected. He healed people, and its reflected by his words, his actions – his entire being alone.
He made Jiang Yuelou feel safe. It’s what made him stronger.
(It’s vice versa for Yuzhi too. They love each other a little too much.)
“I love you.” Yuelou whispers, right in the middle of Yuzhi’s explanations.
Without missing a beat, Yuzhi replies, “I love you too.” And proceeds with his work.
(Truly, they love each other way too much.)
-
“And how does that make you feel?”
“Yuzhi, you’re a doctor, not a therapist. Don’t go switching occupations.”
If anyone was able to talk shit about the Killer and Healer and get away with it, it’s Chu Ran.
That woman is terrifying all on her own.
“I’m just trying to help,” says Yuzhi, the YouTube video playing shows him and fellow best friend slash the ‘friend with the actual braincell’, Chu Ran, having tea together and catching up. The video title says. ‘How Relationships Can Increase And Decrease Stress To A Person’.
“Just how bad is he?”
“I’m gonna say annoying and perverted. He won’t leave me the hell alone!” Chu Ran huffs, gripping her teacup with murderous, narrowed eyes.
“He’s not so bad,” Yuzhi says placatingly, “sure, he’s a major flirt and tends to poke fun at everyone just because he wants to, but that doesn’t make him a terrible person. Jin Dacheng is harmless.”
“Am I hearing this right?” Chu Ran eyes Yuzhi with said deadly eyes, “Are you taking his side?”
“What?” Yuzhi splutters, “No! No, why would I?”
“You sound like you hang around him a lot.”
“That’s probably because Yuelou assigned him as my bodyguard one time because Song Rong and Sun Yongren suck at it.”
Chu Ran raises an eyebrow, “Bodyguard? Since when?”
Yuzhi thinks, “It was a while back… he’s good at it, but yeah, he’s annoying. He’d still be good for you, though. He has this protectiveness that makes him determined to keep people safe. He’s got… determination and… I don’t know, but there’s something about him that tells me he’s a good person.”
The reporter frowns, “This sounds oddly scandalous,” one of her legs kick at Yuzhi’s foot beneath the table, “Are you, what—having some kind of affair with him?”
Yuzhi’s face morphs into shock. He glances at her, then at the camera, then back to her, “What?! Chu Ran, don’t go spouting nonsense like that!”
Chu Ran starts laughing, “Oh? Is it true? Are you having an affair with my fiancé?” she starts teasing relentlessly, the ears of the doctor turning red by the minute, “I suppose that means I’ll have to have an affair with Jiang Yuelou~”
Yuzhi’s warmth and calming aura immediately disappear, replacing it is a cold and darkened edge in the colour of green; jealousy, “That’s not funny, Chu Ran.”
Chu Ran laughs harder, “This is so amusing. I would never Yuzhi!” she places her teacup down, leaning over to hug him affectionately, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Don’t kill me!’
“That’s not my streak,” Yuzhi says, pouting. “I don’t want Yuelou going on a rampage if he heard you say this nonsense…”
Chu Ran hums, “It’s bad that you filmed it then. Perhaps you should edit that out.” she points out, gesturing to the camera.
Yuzhi freezes, gaping, “Oh crap…”
-
Right back to the first video playing before everything else, it continues off from when Yuzhi bought the vintage suitcase.
Jiang Yuelou was seen standing by the staircase in the dark when Yuzhi came home, putting away the make-up products while still holding the vintage suitcase in his hand.
“You gonna explain yourself?” Yuelou says, and Yuzhi freezes. The camera pans in his husband’s direction, and the video zooms in on Yuelou’s unamused face up the stairs. “What’s with the suitcase?”
Yuzhi has no idea why but his first stupid thought and decision was to say, “I’m leaving you.”
Thank God Yuelou can see right through him.
“Yuzhi, this is your house,” the chief points out with a brief chuckle, walking down the steps with sheer amusement in his eyes as he watches Yuzhi squirm under his gaze. “Come on, just give me a rough explanation of why the sudden purchase.” He reaches over to take the suitcase, admiring the material. “Wow, this is… surprisingly sturdy.”
“I know,” Yuzhi smiles. He sets the camera he held on top of the shoe shelf beside him, getting both husbands in frame. He then overlaps his hands on his husband’s, “the quality is so good, and the pockets and space inside the case are big and compatible with my medical equipment. Plus—“ he reaches one hand over to unclasp the fasten of the case, opening it.
Inside, a picture of them, including Keying and Xiao Bai are present. It sits snugly in a conveniently sewed clear pocket meant to store a photo. It’s… cheesily romantic.
“—an added feature that I personally like.” Yuzhi grins, growing unmatched when he sees Yuelou stare at the photo in surprise.
“Okay,” Yuelou says eventually, chuckling, then laughing, “Okay, purchase accepted.” He smirks so attractively at the doctor, it makes his knees weak like it always should.
“Good,” Yuzhi says, leaning his head forward to kiss Yuelou – who returns it eagerly. They bask in the warmth of each other, focused solely on each other – hell, their entire attention is just on each other even when they part from the kiss. A caption appears beneath saying, "Lovey-dovey as always."
Yuelou turns his head to the camera filming them, and huffs, “More content for the Killer and Healer?”
“You know they love us,” Yuzhi keeps his lips close to Yuelou’s.
“More like obsessed with us,” counters the cop, “showing us kissing is gonna defeat the purpose of our opposite personalities.”
“On the contrary, my Chief Jiang,” Yuzhi kisses him again, soft, warm, because Yuzhi is the warmth of a healer, and Yuelou is cold as a killer but soft as Chen Yuzhi's husband – they match each other even when they don’t at all. “It just tells more of our story.”
– Bonus –
(“I also bought some new make-up for Keying. I'll... tell you what happened with the old one later..." Yuzhi tells Yuelou when they’re putting away the cosmetics. “And I met up with Tangchun. He helped me.”
“Oh? Did you have fun?”
“Of course,” Yuzhi nods happily – but then starts blushing all of a sudden.
Yuelou, of course, catches on, “What? What did he do? Was Executive Zhan there too?”
Yuzhi shakes his head, “No, no… it’s just…”
The chief feels a small stab of concern etched in his heart for his husband’s uncomfortable feature – did something happen?
“Yuelou…” Yuzhi says, biting his lower lip.
“Yes? What’s wrong?” Yuelou urges, his hand finding the other’s.
The doctor swallows, glancing anywhere but him, his entire face becoming red. It was practically heating up. Yuelou grew even more concerned.
“Do you…” Yuzhi utters, sighing, “want a child?”
Yuelou almost drops the products.
“Huh?”)