Chapter Text
Christmas party.
I’m 23, finally able and legally free to drink, tonight’s my works Christmas party. My friend Kim she’s older than me but took me under her wing when I joined 21, that’s the district I work at. I’m a Chicago police officer, a rookie, but still I made it. The late nights, the blood sweat and tears, they were all worth it. I wasn’t going to go tonight but Kim twisted my arm, I have a son, he’s 5 months old, he’s the reason I get up everyday and the reason I’ve tried so hard to get to where I am today. Garret my fiancé is staying with Zak whilst I go.
I’m ready to go, I’m wearing a maroon dress that I bought on sale last year before I found out I was pregnant, it hugs my curves and I feel so sexy in it. I wear some black heels and my blonde wavy hair is falling down my back. I feel amazing, my confidence has taken a downward turn since having Zak. Garret says I still have baby weight to lose, and my fitness at work needs to improve. He’s not a cop, just helps me train. Keeps me motivated. Garret works in a paint factory; he says he hates it but it’s good pay so he sticks at it, especially since we had Zak, it’s been tough. His boss seems like slime ball, but Garret likes him.
Kim texts she’s downstairs in the car, I kiss Zak goodnight, I give Garret a kiss, and I go to walk away from him but he grabs my arm twisting it and pulling me back towards him, I stumble but manage to catch myself. “Just remember that you have a kid at home, so don’t be late. Don’t drink to much and don’t forget I will find out if you go talking to other men. If I find out that you have then there will be trouble, do you understand me Hailey?” I look down to the floor and nod my head. “Yes, I understand, and thank you for watching him, he should sleep till morning!”
Garrets grip on my arm loosened and he pushes me away towards the door. There is no reason for him to worry, I’m not a whore, it’s just drink with some of my work friends, their own version of a Christmas party. They know a guy who owns a bar called Molly’s, I think Kim said Platt our Sargent, her husband is part owner. I’m not 100%. Garret was texting me and having a go because I was late home. So, my mind was on what would happen to me when I got home. He’s not a bad guy, its the stress of his job and a new baby, it’s taken its toll on him. So, when he lashes out, I know it isn’t personal, its stress.
I enter Molly’s behind Kim, she finds her friend Kevin easily, he’s a big guy whose laugh is infectious. Next, I meet Adam who Kim has the hot’s for, and there’s Antonio a detective from intelligence. I think Adam works for intelligence too, Kim did say but my mind was on whether or not Garret had left a mark on my arm or not. If I sat with my jacket on, I was going to die it’s so hot in here, but if they see a mark will they ask questions? What would I say? I will leave it on for a bit and go to the toilet to check it soon.
A drink is placed on the table in front of me and the night begins, we drink and dance, Kim slowly introduces all the people she knows through work. Some from CPD some from the Fire department and some from Chicago Med. This is when it became a problem, some of them I recognised from my visits after Garret had gone too far, I thought it was about to get awkward but they didn’t seam to click, so I took a deep breath and carried on. The room was long with a bar that ran down the length of the room with the tables running opposite and then along the top were some booths. Kim was sat next to me and a girl who I recognised from Med on the other side. The door opened and a cheer from our table made me jump, everyone turned to the door and a guy who was easily 6.2 walked towards us. He shook hands and people patted him on his back as he made his way through the masses of party guests towards our table. On his way over he’d had a drink pushed in his hand by a tall ginger haired Dr, who could easily be his brother, turns out he was his brother. Our eyes met as he walked towards us, the air crackled with static electricity, it was brief but it sent jolts of electricity through my spine to parts of my body, that had never felt like that before. I shifted in my seat and looked at my phone. Kim was talking about something that had happened earlier in the week and everyone was laughing with her. As the guy reached our table his scent hit me like a wave crashing on the shore, it was almost as calming too, it was woodsy and had hints of citrus. His name was Jay, Kim introduced us and he shook my hand over the table, that electricity that I felt earlier shot from his hand through mine and I swear it stopped my heart for a second. Now he was closer I could see the green in his eyes, the freckles that were splattered across his face and down his neck. My mind wondered to how far down the freckles went whether or not they were spaced out or if he was covered completely. My phone buzzed in my pocket and it send another wave over me, it was dread. This time my heart clenched and stopped but it wasn’t because the text excited me, it was like a switch had been flicked. I knew my night was over, and I knew Garret was going to be pissed at me.
‘He’s awake and won’t stop crying, get home and deal with it.... Now!’
“Hey Kim thanks for inviting me, I gotta go, Zak’s not settling, I’m sorry.” I grab my clutch and slide of the chair Kim hugs me and I wave goodbye to everyone who I’d met tonight. In a struggle to get out I knock into someone, Jay! He catches me before I fall to the floor. “Hey! You OK? Are you going?” he asks.
“Hi, thanks, yeah, I have to get back, nice to meet you.” I turn to walk away, Jay grasps my arm where Garret had grabbed me earlier, unfortunately it’s instilled in me to flinch and lower my eyes when someone grabs at you like that, although I know Jay wouldn’t hurt me, he’s a cop, a detective. He drops my arm and looks at me, I can see the next question forming on his tongue, oh I wonder what that tongue could do to me. I shake my head and break the spell that’s crackling between us. “Good night!” and with that I burst through the door on to the cold Chicago Street.
When I get home, Zak is kicking up a fuss, I think it’s his teeth, they have been causing him grief for a few weeks. There’s nothing I can do for him. I settle into the rocker in his room, he settles on me as I sing to him in Greek, a lullaby my grandmother used to sing to me. My grandparents are in Greece, my parents came over before I was born, they opened a restaurant and life was tough for them, but we had yearly holidays to visit our family. They were the highlight of the year for us as kids, the beaches the water the serenity that was always accompanied by amazing food cooked by my grandparents. My dad’s temper dissipated and he became a new man until we touched down on American soil. Then he became the stressed out angry dad we all despised. As Zak calmed, I checked my phone. Kim had sent a picture of the table I had been sat on. Jay was sat in my spot and he was stunning. I couldn’t help but zoom in on his face, the boyish cock-sure lopsided grin on his face made me shuffle in my seat again. Omg what was wrong with me. I drifted away to a different place, Jay was there with me and he was touching me in ways I have only ever dreamed of being touched. Desire pooled in my lower belly and heat rushed up my chest, neck and up to my cheeks, as if someone could read my thoughts. Zak was asleep now so I placed him in his crib. He must have been crying for a while, his sobs as I came up the stairs ripped my heart into shreds. He was red in the face and his baby grow was wet I’d changed him before I set him on me on the chair, kissing his head “night baby boy”.
“Why were you gone so long?” Garret asked as I went to the fridge for a bottle of water. “I wasn’t out long, literally 2 hours!” I didn’t see his fist before it made contact with my cheek. I woke up on the bed with a cold compress on my face and a duvet on my legs. No sign of Garret, I looked at the time it was 6 am, I jumped in the shower and got ready for work. Today would suck, I needed to find a way to apologise to Garret for making him mad. Maybe I could get of work early and cook a nice dinner. I had plenty of experience hiding bruises, I had a small amount of swelling on my eye but could blame allergies if needed. Today it hurt to move my jaw, wasn’t going to be easy, but I’d get through it. Kim was the first person I saw, she did a double take on why I had Zak with me, and then at my face.
“Hey Sarge.. ”
“Goldilocks does this look like a Day care centre to you?”
“No, it’s shut and I can’t get hold of my partner and I didn’t want to just not turn up so I’m waiting for my sister in law to come get him, but she’s 20 minutes away, I’m sorry!” Kim had taken Zak and was playing tickling games with him his chuckle made me smile and relax a bit but Plats stare had me gulping. Her face shifted behind me and a bouncy blur of pink shot past me to Kim.
“Don’t tell me Chuckles, you’re waiting for Will to collect Sarah because Day care is shut?” she raised her left eyebrow as she looked at us both.
“It’s Detective Chuckles, and yeah how did you know?” plat looked at me and Kim came and passed Zak back too me. He looked at Jay and smiled then wiped his drool from his face on my top.
“Nice son thanks!” Sarah was playing with his leg and he tried to throw himself down to her level to play.
Sarah was about three, her auban hair was in a plait, and her dress was pink and sparkling. Zak was smitten with her, but by the seams of it they knew each other from Day care.
“Goldilocks go change, Kim watch the offspring, Chuckles get upstairs, Hank wants you.”
We both turned to go our respective ways and ended up facing each other, I stepped to the left and he stepped to the right. Both of us ended up in front of each other again. I looked up and him he was looking at me with a hint of humour on his face he placed his hands on my shoulders and stepped back to his left, his smile as he walked away was something that played on my mind all day.
“Goldilocks get changed!”
“Sorry Sarge!” I passed Zak to Kim and walked into the changing room. I was being an idiot; he obviously had a wife or girlfriend. But a girl could dream right?
By the time I’d finished my shift, Zak was ready for bed and Garret wasn’t going to be home till late. I called Kim and asked her if she fancied pizza. She arrived an hour later with beer and she met the delivery guy, so had the pizza too.
“Hey, was everything OK when you came home last night?” Kim asked as they hit their second beer and had ate a third of their dinner.
“Yeah, Zak is super cranky with his teeth, Garret just doesn’t have the patience with him like I do.”
“You know if you need to talk about anything or you need a break, I’m here for you, you are always welcome at my place you and Zak!”
Kim knew! I swallowed a gulp of my beer and look at the floor. I was about to become one of them, one of those women who cover up their abuse, who don’t do anything to help them self’s or their kids. Just like my Mom, I could see the look on Kim’s face as she prepared herself for the lies that were about to spill from my lips.
“I’m good Kim, thank you though, I’m not going to lie, he’s been under a lot of stress with work and the new baby, I promise its a one of.”
“promise me that you will come to me if you need me?”
“thank you, I will.”
“listen on Sunday I am having some people over, well Kevin and his brother and sister, Adam and Jay, you should come bring Zak, he loved playing with Sarah today! Tell me you will think about it.” She stood up to leave it was past eight and we had work the following day.
“I will come if that’s OK? Garret work g and it will be good to get out. Do you need me to bring anything?” we hug as Kim gets to the door and she reply with a no. They didn’t need to take anything. I clean up and head to bed. Zak doesn’t wake in the night and Garret sleeps on the couch. The next day I drop Zak off at daycare and Jay I’d there dropping of Sarah.
The electricity is still there and Sarah makes a point of talking to Zak, so Jay and I have to speak. Its not awkward but it’s not easy either. As I walk out to the sidewalk Jay follows me.
“Are you going to the district?” He asks me.
“Yeah! I am going to get a coffee first though”
“Do you need a ride?” he asks.
“Erm, sure but I am desperate for coffee, we ran out at home.”
“OK I need some too. Sarah decided that sleep is for the weak. She’s regressed back to waking at 1 am for a drink.”
“I’m not going to brag and tell you Zak slept through last night!”
“I thought you and I were going to be friends! Now I’m not so sure”
“I’m sorry, I really am” they laughed as they got their coffees to go and Jay got one for Platt. To apologise for the day before. She was a kitten really but likes to pretend she is a tiger. As they leave the coffee shop and get to Jay’s car they talk about the district and Platt. They walk to the front desk and I thank Jay for the ride and go get ready for my shift. Kim is waiting for me and we set off for the day Kim and I get on really well, we arrest a guy for breaking and entering and then another for stealing a car. The last call of the day is to a guy who intelligence are after and Kim and I get stuck in a gun fight with him. I manage to shoot him in the leg, my first time discharging my weapon and shooting someone. Whilst it’s all happening I’m there in the zone, but as other cops turn up and medics fuss over me, I think I go into shock. Jay is sitting next too me on the ambulance steps. The guy shot at me and a bullet grazed my arm, I hadn’t felt it. I look at Jay and the adrenaline must of warn of cause I start to shake, he holds my hand to stop them shaking and he sits me in the back of his car. We drive back to the district in a daze. I get taken to the break room that intelligence use. Kim follows and a older looking guy. I feel like my day just went to shit.