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Published:
2022-06-26
Completed:
2024-01-01
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136,231
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31/31
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By the Beard of Zeus!

Summary:

Aether hails from a different world. That means that if he worships a god, it wouldn't be one from Teyvat. One day Aether accidentally swears to the name of an alien god while inside of Favonius Cathedral, and just like that, things slowly spiral out of control.

Notes:

This fic will so age poorly once a character actually named Zeus shows up in Genshin Impact.

Also, why the hell am I making this fic? I don't even play Genshin anymore.

Chapter 1: The Slap

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Aether, Mondstadt’s beloved traveler. An honorary knight of Favonius, and a cherished hero who journeys long and far like a knight errant in search for his sister while helping commonfolk along the way. Admiration for him only seems to grow exponentially, without even a glimmer of decline. People all over Mondstadt and even neighboring Liyue fawned over him, be it discounts, gifts, and so on.

While Aether found the admiration welcome, be it the girls who threw themselves at him or the guys who… more or less did the same, it did get overwhelming. Exhaustion entailed him as there was always a request awaiting him, and pressure which only grew alongside his popularity due to ever skyrocketing expectations. Searching for a level of peace for the day, Aether found himself walking towards the Favonius cathedral. While everybody did desire his presence (in both wanted and rather unwanted ways), few would dare request him of anything within such a holy place.

Aether walked through the cathedral doors, and almost immediately did everyone in it turn to glance at him. It didn’t matter how quiet or discrete he tried to be about it, the people who were in the cathedral that day took notice anyways. It was as if the wind had announced his arrival by whispering into each and everyone’s ears. Aether couldn’t help but pull his cape a bit to cover his exposed waist. He could see some of them, even the nuns, visually undressing him, eyeing him like how a wolf would eye a lone sheep.

He really should have worn something else. Especially upon remembering that he was in a cathedral, meaning he likely wasn’t adhering to the dress code either.

The looks continued, watching his long golden ponytail swing and bob. Admiring his skin, ostensibly unblemished despite his frequent battles and other labors. Said battles and labors that developed the fine muscles that laid underneath. Sculpted abs graced the sides of his exposed navel, which he was currently concealed with his fine white cape. To say that the traveler known as Aether was an irresistible adonis to all those laid eyes on him was akin to saying that fish dwell in the ocean.

Aether sat in a secluded corner by the back of the cathedral, far away from the rest of the onlooking crowd. He really should find another area.Sitting there, he clasps his hands together and closes his eyes. His mind begins to focus on his sister, who he has lost and seeks to find. His prayer is silent, kept only within the confines of his mind. As he does so, he remembers that he hasn’t really made any offerings in a long while. He really should do so, but where? Aether remains there in silence, fixated on both his prayer to the heavens above and to what exactly he’ll do with his offerings while he is here instead of home.

Unbeknownst to Aether, the bard known as Venti had entered the church as well. His divine senses, while faint, took notice of Aether’s movement through folded space by means of the Teleportation Waypoints. One moment the traveler was somewhere in Jueyun Karst’ Guili Plains, the next he was within Mondstadt’s walls. It wasn’t that hard to pick up regardless of how low his powers had dwindled over the passage of time. Sneakily, the bard tiptoed over to Aether. He could sense others already glaring at him, but he brushes them off.

Besides, isn’t a god allowed to do what they please within their own church?

Venti places both of his hands on Aether’s shoulders, shaking him a small bit. “Aether!” says the bard in a joyous tone.

“Ack!” yelled Aether, the startled traveler flinches, and instinctively looks back to see Venti’s happy yet mischievous expression. “By the Beard of Zeus, Venti! What is it?!”

The cheery open-mouthed smile on Venti’s face vanished almost immediately, with gasps and silence to follow and fill the room with awkward pause. Aether looks around him, oblivious to what he’d done.

“Beard of who?” Venti asks, his normally bubbly tone now diminished, as if his heart had been torn into a million pieces. It wasn’t everyday that a man swears to another deity in front of a god. It would have been somewhat fine if it was his fellow archons, or perhaps even a god of the past, but no. The lovely Aether, megastar of Mondstadt, mentioned someone completely new.

Aether, beloved Aether, belonged to someone else. Belonged to another god..

A storm of emotions swelled within Venti. As if ready to tear away at the facade and become Barbatos once more, weaver of the winds, master of the sky. As if challenged. Venti cared little for who did and did not worship him, even those who proclaimed that they doubted his existence or simply worshiped someone else did little to his feelings. Yet with Aether, it was as if he had relearned the power to smite. The ancient fury of a million hurricanes past and a million cyclones yet to come continued to bubble erratically within the bard, with Venti trying his absolute best to mask the growing feeling.

“Psst… Aether..” Paimon popped into existence, whispering into his ear, “Barbara’s walking towards us!”

Aether tears his eyes away from Venti and towards the main walkway of the cathedral, where a visibly angry idol stormed down, glaring daggers straight at him. It was at that moment Aether realized the reasoning behind the several stares that befell him. He’d just sworn to another god in the cathedral. His reputation was definitely going to take a hit after that. Just like the hit he was going to receive as Barbara got ever closer.

The deaconess’ hand lashed out like lightning, striking his unsullied cheek like a whip. The lashing sound of the impact echoes throughout the walls of the cathedral, drawing another audible gasp from the surrounding masses. Aether was stunned, feeling the stinging sensation that lingered after the slap. His skin, once pure as the driven snow, was now as red as an apple. Looking at Barbara’s face, Aether could better examine her features. Small beads of water bordered her eyes which in turn exuded a look of both utter rage and spiritual betrayal. Her teeth gritted, as if they were ready to shatter if she were to continue pressing them down and grinding them together.

Unsure how exactly to respond, or just outright handle the situation, Aether immediately bolts out the cathedral, jumping off the ledges and gliding quickly down to the main square, down the steps, and out of the city entirely. In his rush, he’d forgotten that he could have just used a teleport waypoint, and so off into the neighboring forests he went. He ran, and he did not stop. His heart pumped as much blood as it could into his legs which carried him farther and farther away from the city. Not even daring to look back, Aether sprinted at a breakneck pace as if he were a jetstream personified.

“Aether! Hold on!” Paimon yelled, trying her absolute best to float after her companion. He’d never run like this before. He was going to crash out of exhaustion if he kept on like this.

Winds blew hard over Mondstadt, the clouds gathering as mysterious updrafts began to form around the entire nation. The entire land began to reek of anemo vision, especially the statues which depicted the archon Barbatos. Clouds covered up the sun, and if they were to continue and compress further they might soon darken and unleash rain down upon the earth. As the nebulosity grew over the land, there was a small window of sunlight shining down. That window of light was down upon Aether, who did not tire in his impromptu marathon away from the city.


The stone gate was a simple area that connected Mondstadt north with Liyue south. It was a lot more unimpressive than what some would expect. Nothing more but a humble tea shop and a continued long-winding road, but to Aether, it was a nice place to calm his nerves. Despite being a literal path from one land to the next, few people ever really moved through the stone gate, and the place was rural enough for both areas that he was much more of a stranger here. The blond traveler chugged down a cup of tea to try and calm his nerves. He never stopped running from Mondstadt to here. One could say he had run out of adrenaline, while others could be inclined to say he had tapped into an unprecedented well of stamina. Whichever it may be, Aether was far away from Mondstadt, and as far as he was certain, safe.

“Hold on there, sonny, that’s your third bowl. What’s gotten into you?” asks Pop Zhou. The old man was sitting down on the same table as Aether, watching the young man seemingly attempt to get himself drunk on tea, “I’m happy for the business and all, but it judging from your overwhelming desire for tea and the fact that you came running with the wind at your tails, something must truly be wrong.”

“It’s nothing…” says Aether, placing the small bowl of pop’s tea down on the table, wiping his mouth with his hand. “Just problems back at Mondstadt, trying to let things blow over and all.”

“Problems? In Mondstadt? That’s peculiar…” Aunt Qiao butted in. It was a slow day, Aether was the only person there currently. “Aren’t you quite the megastar there? Surely it could not be so big.”

Aether didn’t really respond, instead awkwardly looking away. He feels a serene gust of wind hit his face, no doubt a weaker stream of air dragged by the ongoing jetstreams which gathered back at home. His eyes float upwards to see Paimon trying to catch dandelion seeds in her mouth. The winds, seemingly imbued with anemo power, had blown several dandelions all around. Whisking every seed into the wind. The petite girl tried to catch as many as she could as each seed was carried off by the strong wind.

“Careful, Paimon! You might get blown away!” Aether called out.

“Paimon fine!” Paimon replied, only to get blown off by the wind shortly after. Paimon soon reappears by Aether’s side, “hey! No fair! Paimon wanted some of Pop’s Tea too!”

“Easy now, little girl” Pops Zhou laughs, standing up, “I’ll get some, until then, feel free to tell us what exactly happened to bring you here in such a rush.”

Paimon pouts at being called a little girl, but Aether just chuckles.

“The winds are angry because Aether made Barbara angry at church” says Paimon, floating around Aether, “she slapped him and everything.”

“Oh my,” Aunt Qiao couldn’t help but place a hand over her mouth, “she must’ve been quite angry to slap you then. A girl’s feelings aren’t to be toyed with after all..”

“His cheek was all red and everything too!” Paimon giggles, although the cheer quickly turns into a light frown, “but she really was quite mad. She went from the front of the cathedral all the way to where Aether was sitting and then BLAM! She could’ve easily KO’ed a hilichurl with it! Right, Aether?”

“Mhmm..” Aether rubs his right cheek, the redness may have been gone but the shock and sting of it clung onto his skin like a tattoo.

“Barbara? Pardon my limited knowledge, but isn’t she that bubbly singer girl?” Pops Zhou returned with another bowl of tea, this time for Paimon. “Last I recall, she has a hydro vision, and also a… deaconess, right? What did you do to make a woman of the cloth resort to violence?”

Aether remained quiet, not really wanting to further his precarious position any further, especially here, a place that safeguarded him from the reach of most people. The sound of Paimon sipping her tea fills the silence. The traveler twiddled his thumbs, wondering whether or not to answer.

Both elders sat down patiently, letting the traveler take his time. The wind did not cease, and the clouds above only continued to slowly darken. Paimon places down the small bowl, “Venti startled Aether at church and he shouted really loud.”

“Hmm?” Pops Zhou raised an eyebrow, “that doesn’t sound so bad. I’m sure Barbara’s come to her senses since then. If anything, this Venti person is more to blame.”

“Well… she wasn’t really angry at the shout… more of the.. Uh..” Aether scratches the back of his head, “the content, you could say. I uh.. Swore to another god.”

“Oh my, now that’s quite embarrassing,” says Aunt Qiao, “but I suppose it can’t be helped. It’s a figure of expression after all. I wouldn’t be caught dead swearing in the anemo god’s name either.” The two elders laughed at the last statement, while Aether sat there.

“So,” Pops Zhou slaps the table, “to who exactly did you swear to? Rex Lapis? The shogun? The pyro archon? Lots of gods to pick from.”

Aether’s heart skipped a beat as tendrils of nervousness dug deep into him. He could probably just lie and say Rex Lapis, that would surely let things slide easily, right? Yes, he could just-

“He swore to the beard of some dude called Zoo or something.” answered Paimon. Aether tried his best to contain the raw shriek of frustration at Paimon ruining his little escape plan.

“Zoo?” Aunt Qiao tilted her head.

“Zoo, Zood, Zoos… Zoos? Yeah! Zoos! That’s it!” says the floating girl, “leave it to Paimon to remember strange names!’

“Just so you know, I’m eating your legs first” Aether huffs. Paimon gasps, “hey! Paimon is not an emergency food!”

“Zoos.. that’s a god, right?” Pops Zhou asks Aunt Qiao. Although the woman could only shrug, “not as far as I know.” The two look over to the young traveler. Aether could only sigh, “I suppose there’s no use withholding it any longer. I’m not from here, so I worship a god quite alien from this place as a result.”

“You’re a pagan?” Pops Zhou takes Paimon’s empty tea bowl.

“In this context, I suppose, yes”

“Interesting,” Pops Zhou stands up, “well, don’t worry lad. I don’t mind. Lots of gods roam Teyvat, a couple extra from faraway places aren’t so bad.”

“Well said,” Aunt Qiao nodded, “you need not worry about your beliefs here at the Stone Gate, child. As far as we are concerned, you’re still the same hero.”

Pops Zhou went back to his stall to return the bowl. Aunt Qiao on the other hand adjusts her sitting position, “so you swore to this pagan god of yours while inside of the Favonius cathedral? My my, I suppose that does make sense. I can see the convent forgiving swearing to another archon, but a, no offense, heathen god might be a whole new echelon of offensive.”

“Who is Zoos anyways?” Paimon asks Aether, “ Paimon was planning to ask you earlier but you were too busy running really fast.”

“Yes,” calls a chilling voice. Aether flinches, the hair on the back of his neck standing up. Aether turns around to see the yaksha, Xiao.

“Oh my, an adeptus!” Pops Zhou exclaims, ‘have mercy on the pagan, his heart means well!”

Xiao ignores the old man’s plea and walks over to Aether. His hands gripping his polearm tight as he leaned his head close to the traveler’s face, locking eyes with him. An intimidating glare to rattle the blond.

“Go ahead, traveler. Who exactly is this alien god you worship?”

Notes:

Honestly I'm not sure if I should end it on this cliffhanger or proceed with another chapter. Probably the latter.

So yeah, Aether is quite the "irresistible" one for this fanfic. A bunch of fanfics seem to do the same thing so I might as well. It makes sense, popularity seems to be a mechanic in Genshin Impact as far as I remember.

As for why I chose Zeus instead of another deity, like say... the Abrahamic God, Odin, or Shiva, well honestly I just felt like it. If I choose the Abrahamic God, this entire fanfic might feel undesirably preachy and immersion-breaking. Also Genshin Impact in general has references to Greek myth, so I thought I might as well bring up old Big Z to finish things off.