Archive of Our Own ^beta

Tibby

Tibby always knew that her sisterhood was a little...different. Other girls had best friends, of course, and other girls had people they cared deeply about. But the way the four of them were - it was just, a lot. They were close. They were really close.

Tibby's first crush ever was on Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Tibby's second crush was on Alicia Silverstone, and she'd never really struggled with her 'sexuality' after that. Liking girls was just another thing that was a little off-putting about her, something that made her different from the normies. A rainbow ribbon on her backpack full of weird pins.

She didn't realize it was like that for the other girls until after That Summer.

Carmen

Bridget was so beautiful it was hard to look at sometime. At least, Carmen thought so, and she sort of assumed everyone felt that way about Bridget. Bridget was striking. She was intense. She glowed and lit up the world and made heads turn around her. It was hard to stay out of her orbit...

But everyone felt that way around Bridget, right?

Eventually Carmen realized maybe she was different in how she felt about Bridget. But it was just...it was just Bridget. She was special like that.

All her friends were special. Carmen felt close to them in a way she had never known with other relationships so of course with Bridget it would be that extra thing.

Lena

Sometimes Lena wondered why her friends stuck with her. She was so boring, and they were so...extra. Extra everything. Being around them made her feel more bright, more colorful, like the world expanded.

It was nice, and she felt lucky. Sometimes she wondered what she offered them. 

That Summer, she met Kostos, and she felt that way, like her world expanded. But he also made her realize that she'd felt that way before. It wasn't unfamiliar, to be around someone who made her light up, who made the sun seem brighter, her life more complex and exciting. She'd been living that way her whole life; she just hadn't seen it for what it was.

Bridget

It was a wild cliche to say that girls soccer camp made her gay, but there it was. 

The thing with Eric happened, and she kind of fell apart afterwards. That was most of what her summer was focused on. But in the back of her mind she knew that two of her bunkmates were hooking up, and after she got home she found herself thinking about that a lot. More than she thought about Eric, even. 

Bridget had always been boy-crazy, she knew that. Boys were very available, very much there for the taking. That was cool. 

But, maybe...

September

It was two weeks after the wedding, and school was starting in a few days. They were hanging out at Bridget's - she had the most room, the best dog, the least supervision. Carmen was making them all crack up, as always, telling some elaborate story about what her mom had said to her that morning. Bridget was lying on her bed, long golden hair spilling over the edge, grinning. Tibby leaned against Bridget’s bed, fidgeting with a pen in her lap. And Lena was sitting between Tibby and Carmen, leaning back on her hands, her legs crossed demurely at the ankle.

Later on they would never agree on who made the first move. Carmen swore it was Bridget, but Bridget and Lena both said it was Tibby. “I blacked out, I dont know anything,” was all Tibby’s could say. 

However it started, it happened. Tibby’s hand smoothed Bridget’s hair out of her face, Bridget looking into her eyes. Lena’s ankle moved closer to Carmen’s leg. A few moments, small movements, and suddenly everything was different. 

They were still talking - about what they were going to do the next day, about whether to go down to the kitchen for more snacks- and then they looked up and there was a moment of not talking at all. 

Bridget did start kissing first, that everyone was sure about. She leaned forward and pressed her lips against Tibby’s, softly, so soft that it couldn’t be heard, even in the breathless silence they were all in. 

Tibby kissed her back, fingers clenching around the pen in her hand, and then around Bridget’s shoulders. 

It was only a few seconds before they separated. Carmen and Lena were holding hands now, watching with wide eyes. 

Bridget giggled, collapsing back onto the bed and wiping the back of her hand against her mouth. Tibby looked stunned, for once at a loss for words. 

“Have you ever done that before?” Lena asked, her voice barely a whisper.

“No,” said Bridget.
“Yes,” said Tibby, simultaneously. 

Everyone giggled, and Carmen said, “What?”

“I’ve never kissed Bridget before-” Tibby said. 

‘Yeah, no kidding,” Bridget giggled. 

“-but I have kissed a girl before, if that’s what you were asking,” Tibby continued. 

“Pshaw,” said Carmen. “I don’t care about “a girl” I care about Bridget. Kissing Bridget!”

“What, you want some, too?” Bridget asked rolling over and sticking her face close to Carmen’s, laughing. 

Carmen’s eyes got big, and her mouth closed abruptly. “Um,” she said, and the room got quiet again.

A pause.

“I do, I think,” said Carmen. Bridget wasn’t laughing any more. 

Carmen and Bridget kissed, and Tibby made eye contact with Lena next to her. They didn’t speak, but Tibby’s eyebrows went up, and her head cocked. Lena breathed in deeply, and then-

Then they were kissing, too.

It took only a few seconds for their world to change, completely.

Carmen broke first, giggling and falling backwards.

“Hey,” said Bridget, but she didn't actually sound upset or anything. 

Tibby pulled back from Lena, breathing heavily. Lena was smiling her small crooked smile, the one she only showed to them.

“Are we really doing this?” Lena asked.

She didn’t specify what, but they all knew. No one responded for a moment, the only sound their slightly elevated breathing. 

“Hell yeah we are,” said Bridget. She was grinning, incandescent and theirs. They all started to laugh, shrieking and grabbing each other. 

“I think maybe we’ve been doing it all along,” Lena said, though no one was really listening. It didn't matter. They'd always been different.