Chapter Text
If someone had told him a few hours earlier that the new waiter at his favorite restaurant would turn out to be someone who had recently tried to slit his throat, Leo would've thought, "Well, Thursday afternoon like any other." Unfortunately, no one bothered to warn him in time, so he had to deal with the first wave of shock right there on the spot – in record time, and in the only way he knew how.
The rabbit didn't even flinch when the blade of his sword stopped inches from his neck. In fact, he looked almost bored, as if things like this happened to him far too often.
"Sir, I have to ask you to hide your sword," he said, moving the blade a little further from his fur with one finger. "We have a strict ban on the use of melee weapons and firearms since... The Incident."
Leo was so surprised by the lack of emotion in his voice that he actually lowered his sword for a moment.
"What incident?" he asked, but quickly connected the dots. "Oh, yeah, that- I'm The Incident."
He didn't even try to look guilty, and he suspected that if Hueso could hear him, he'd be banned for life. Fortunately, the owner was never around, so Leo could continue to feel as unbothered as ever.
Rabbit, on the other hand, looked like he didn't feel anything at all. Ever.
"So I heard," was all he said, pointing to a nearby pillar where, in fact, a large poster informed about the legal consequences of bringing anything sharper than a fork into the restaurant. Leo could've sworn it wasn't there a minute ago. "We allow the use of chemical weapons. As long as they don't get things dirty. Can I take your order or should I come back in a minute?"
He reached into his pocket but froze as the sword reappeared at his neck.
"A-a-a!" Leo instinctively tensed, gripping the hilt tighter, his eyes roaming between his opponent's face and his hands. "You're not moving anywhere. Stay where I can see you."
Rabbit looked at him, at the blade – almost touching the white fur, and casually ignored both, taking a small notebook from his pocket and opening it to a blank page in one, fluid motion.
"We have a wide selection of entrées," he announced, clicking his pen. Leo had no idea when he pulled it out. "If I can recommend something-"
The sword layed flat against his throat, and he tilted his chin to avoid the blade. Leo moved closer, ignoring the voice in his head that warned him that the last time he let the gap between them close this much, he couldn't get up from a gut-wrenching kick for a long time.He wasn't famous for drawing conclusions and learning from mistakes, especially his own.
"You can tell me who sent you after us, and maybe I'll be nice and give you a head start."
Their faces were so close that each deep breath he took made the thick fur on the rabbit's fluffy cheeks shift with the air. Under any other circumstances, Leo would've found it a bit embarrassing, but also strangley cute. Especially since, objectively speaking – his opponent was still quite handsome.
Just like the last time they'd seen each other, a pair of long ears fell around the nape of his neck, tied high on top of his head. But that was pretty much where the similarities ended. Instead of a blue kimono, the rabbit was now wearing a white, loose shirt with rolled up sleeves, a black waistcoat, and a red apron with a spare menu and several children's coloring books protruding from the front pocket. He was also a bit thinner, slouched, and there was no trace of that burning determination in his eyes, that he had while attempting to murder all of them just a few weeks earlier.
Leo wished he could say it was a futile attempt, but he still had a few bruises, and Donnie complained about the pain in his ankle at every opportunity.
In their defense: they were taken by surprise, right after eating and during a week when they just didn't have the time or the desire to train. They wanted to spend a nice, family evening admiring the city from the roof of a skyscraper, they had no plans to chase any villains, let alone fight them. But apparently, once you're a hero, it's no longer up to you to decide when and who you fight.
Mikey was the first to sense that something was wrong. He couldn't tell if he heard or saw something out of the corner of his eye, but before he could decide – Donnie was already pulling him aside, as a sword whizzed through the air, right where his head was just a second ago. Leo cursed, drawing his own weapon just in time to parry an attack he didn't even see, until the blade was flashing right in front of his face. He braced his legs, flexing his muscles to keep still, and only when his opponent was close enough to hear his breathing did he get a closer look at him.
He expected... a lot of things. Something big, that's for sure. Dangerous, of course. And most of all, familiar. Because after months of fights with the same villains, he was sure that at this point he knew them all on a personal level. But the big, red eyes were new, their gaze was piercing, and the thick, white fur surrounding them looked like absolutely anything, but danger. Leo almost wanted to slide his fingers into it, just to see if it felt as soft as it looked. But before he could decide if he wanted to follow that thought, his opponent jumped back and lowered into a fighting stance, just a few meters away. Leo, almost mindlessly, did the same, adjusting the position of the sword in his hands. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Donnie pull out his staff; Raph's hands glowed red. For a moment, a few very long, endless seconds, they just watched each other, evaluating and analyzing.
It wasn't anyone they knew, nobody they already knew exactly what to expect from. Their new enemy was quiet. And fast. He attacked suddenly and didn't hesitate to deliver potentially fatal blows.
Their new enemy had a sword and knew how to make the best of it.
He also had a pair of long ears and a fluffy, white tail, that made it damn hard to take him seriously.
"Ooh..." Leo was the first to break the tense silence, leaning forward on his sword. "Look how cute he is," he chirped, and the bunny wrinkled his little, pink nose. "Awww, and he thinks he's dangerous!"
Donnie scowled at him, but also visibly lowered his guard.
"Nardo, in case you haven't noticed, Mr. 'Cute' is holding a sword."
Leo dismissed him with a wave of his hand.
"And? He's a hare," he snorted, looking at his brothers, waiting for the punchline to finally hit them. Nothing. "Oh come on, like that fairy tale? He's the hare, and we're the turtles." He pointed at their opponent, then at himself, trying to make the point as clear as possible. Especially for his twin. "We have a natural advantage."
"Wasn't the moral of that story to not be overconfident?" Mikey asked. Leo chose to ignore his completely unnecessary statement. Mainly because he never read the book to the end.
Raph, meanwhile, stepped forward, holding up his hands in a placating gesture.
"Hi! How about we talk this out calmly, huh?" he proposed, probably still hoping they would be able to finish their pizza in peace.
Rabbit flexed his arms, lifting his katana higher.
"My boss wants you dead, so I'll have you dead, even if I have to pierce your shells with my bare hands," he announced.
And – okay, Leo knew that practically no one they knew wished them particularly well, but Jesus...
Raph seemingly also decided that further negotiations didn't make much sense and he clenched his fists.
"That's not quite what I meant, but okay. Mad Dogs!" He glanced at his brothers over his shoulder, grinning widely. "Let's hunt a rabbit!"
They didn't hunt shit. If Leo were to be completely honest, he would have to admit, that the rabbit almost hunted them, but he preferred to spare the details and preserve what little dignity he had left. It was enough that if they hadn't left the tank only a street away, they probably wouldn't have been able to get away. The portal Leo was able to create with the last of his strength was too small for anyone to squeeze through. But it was just the right size to put his hand in and pull on the bunny's ears, just before he chopped off Mikey's arm. Was it a low blow? Maybe. Probably. Leo didn't give a fuck. For the next two days he was barely able to get out of bed and was as far away as possible from feeling guilty.
Then... Well, to be honest, Leo had completely forgotten about that. They barely had time to recover before Draxum managed to put together The Dark Armor and unleash the Shredder on the city, so they couldn't complain about the lack of entertainment. They had much more important things on their minds, three days of constant stress, constant vigilance, always in combat mode, and when the adrenaline finally wore off and they had a chance to rest, they fell asleep for the next two days straight, huddled on Raph's bed, because neither of them wanted to break out of their family cocoon and be alone with their own thoughts. With all the doubts and 'what ifs'.
Tonight was the first time Leo had come to the surface since then, and now he damn well regretted it. He could've been sitting under a blanket, eating popcorn and watching Lou Jitsu movies with his brothers, but nooo...
Rabbit continued to stare at him in the same, dispassionate way, chin up just enough to avoid the blade and never breaking the eye contact.. He swallowed, his shoulders tensed, and Leo knew that feeling all too well, that impulse to reach for the sword, to fight, to get out of this alive.
But the bunny only breathed a little deeper and picked up the notebook, clicking his pen urgently.
"So, back to the appetizers..."
Leo lowered his sword before he had time to think about it. And then, more thoughtfully, he poked the 'waiter' in the chest with it, in a last attempt to get any sensible reaction out of him.
"Okay, if this is some kind of disguise, you're getting a little too into it," he judged, as annoyed as intrigued. He could appreciate when someone put their whole heart into their work, even if it was the role of a black hole, sucking out emotions from the whole environment.
He didn't have time to express his appreciation out loud.
"Leo!" He heard a voice behind him and immediately spun around to face the owner himself. A very unhappy owner. He hid his sword behind his back just in case, though the situation was pretty obvious anyway.
Hueso frowned, looked first at Leo, then at the rabbit, then at Leo again, then grimaced and crossed his arms with a very serious expression.
"Are you just harassing my employee?"
Leo expected almost every possible plot twist, but definitely not this one.
"He works here?" He pointed to the waiter (apparently a real waiter) with the tip of his sword, then hid it behind his back again. Hueso might have a soft spot for him, but The Incident was still an incident. "For real?"
Rabbit started playing with the pen again.
"I've got an apron and eveything..." he muttered.
Leo came to the conclusion that he had doubted his intuition and common sense too quickly. Fluffy ears or not, the guy was evil, sneaky, and most likely planned to destroy his life from the inside out by trickery.
"You can't hire him!" He protested, this time remembering to switch his Ōdachi to his other hand before pointing accusingly at the rabbit. "He's a criminal!"
Hueso didn't look particularly concerned.
"Really?"
"He tried to kill me!"
"Who hasn't?" he snorted, and even if there was a lot of truth to it, Leo still felt hurt and didn't hesitate to show it. "If I had to fire everyone you had a fight with, the restaurant would fall apart, Pepino."
"He wanted to slit my throat!"
"But he didn't, seeing how you can still talk so much." He stepped around Leo, standing next to the rabbit and putting his arm around him. "Usagi is a very hard-working boy, the best employee I had in a long time."
Usagi gave no indication that the compliment made an impression on him. If anything, he looked even more tired than before the start of this whole conversation.
Leo wasn't about to fall for those empty eyes and lack of will to live.
"That's cool, because the last guy he worked for wanted us dead," he pointed out, and oddly enough, that was the first thing that made the rabbit show any semblance of emotion. Admittedly, it disappeared just as quickly, but it was still a step towards unmasking.
"See?" Hueso spread his arms. "So it wasn't even his idea," he said, but before Leo could get properly offended, his face turned serious. "He's a good boy and you'll be nice to him, Pepino, or you'll never get a discount again," he threatened, which was completely absurd and a sign that the whole world had turned upside down after all. Leo blamed the Foot Clan. And Shredder. And Big Mama. "Besides, I'm sure he had a change of heart. Right, Lechuga?"
They both looked at Usagi expectantly. The rabbit took his time, twirling the pen in his fingers for a moment, before finally sighing. And in that same, emotionless voice, he announced:
"My boss fucking died."
Leo, once again, expected anything but this.
"What?" he asked, glancing at Hueso, who looked just as surprised. And probably already a little taken by the fate of a poor, professionally orphaned boy.
Usagi, meanwhile, finally left the pen alone, starting to run his fingers over one of his ears for a change.
"My boss. I mean, the previous one," he clarified quickly, as if his current employer wasn't standing right next to him, safe and sound. "His evil plan didn't quite work out for him or something. And, well... it was his last. Plan, I mean. Surprisingly common in this line of work, I've heard." He shrugged, this time looking directly at Leo. "Anyway, my management changed, and I'm not being paid to kill you guys anymore, so... I don't know. Can we shake hands, or something?"
It was hard to tell when he kept his expression so blank, but Leo figured he was being serious.
"Absolutely not."
Usagi nodded in understanding.
"It's okay, I didn't really care. Do you want to order something or should I come back later?" He tapped his pen on his still blank notebook. "I'm trying to be a good citizen, but I can't pay my taxes if you don't let me work.''
Leo wanted to say, that if he didn't finally leave his pen alone, he'd gouge someone's eye out, but he kept quiet. Even without it, Hueso looked at him like he was waiting for an opportunity to kick him out of the door. Hungry.
"You see?" He patted Usagi on the shoulder again, as if he had known him for years and trusted him with his life. "A good boy. Follow his example, Pepino."
And he left, like he hasn't just found out one of his employees was a criminal and most likely on a wanted poster. Leo could only call "He tried to kill me!" after him, but he was no longer hoping for any miracles.
He placed his order with extreme reluctance, still expecting his pizza to turn up poisoned. He took it to go, just in case, to test the first piece on Donnie. Usagi didn't muster even a bit of human emotion until the very end, he didn't even comment when Leo accidentally 'forgot' to leave him a tip – he just looked at him with the utmost indifference and wished him a nice day, looking as like he really hoped that he himself won't live to see another one. There was something damn overwhelming about the thought that one day, they might all end up like this: burnt out, tired, doomed to work in foodservice. If Leo didn't have very fresh memories of the rabbit's foot nearly piercing his stomach, he'd probably feel more sympathy.
But he remembered it all too well. And he was going to cherish that grudge forever.