Chapter Text
These days, Ava almost always woke up with a smile on her face. It was nearly impossible not to. This morning, it was because she woke up in the warmest bed she’s ever known.
The sound of her and Beatrice’s shared alarm rang through the otherwise silent hotel room, and Ava felt her girlfriend gently roll away from her to turn it off. Beatrice resettled on the bed while Ava, rather unconvincingly, she’s sure, pretended to be still asleep while curled in a ball on her side.
If Ava doesn’t open her eyes, Beatrice will stare at her for several minutes in silence. Just the idea makes Ava’s skin bloom with warmth, and Ava gladly lets Beatrice do it for as long as she wants to. They have the time; Beatrice always makes sure of that.
The actress had taken to setting their alarm nearly an hour before they actually needed to get out of bed. And that hour was quickly becoming Ava’s favorite part of the day. Sometimes they spent it in silence. Sometimes they quietly whispered about what their days looked like. Other times they let fingers dance over skin as they reminded the other how much they loved each other.
But, just like every other morning in the nearly two weeks they had been in Ireland so far, Beatrice gently tucked a stray strand of hair behind Ava’s ear, pressed a featherlight kiss to the apple of her cheek, and Ava opened her eyes with a smile tugging on her lips.
She was met with gleaming, twinkling eyes so inviting that Ava almost jumped in. Ava didn’t know it was possible for someone to look at her with so much love.
“Good morning, my love,” Beatrice whispered, a smile curling on her lips. The fluffy white comforter was pulled to her chin, golden morning light framing her face. What must it be like to grow up that beautiful?
“Hi baby,” Ava mumbled sleepily as she scooted closer to nuzzle into her girlfriend. Without a moment of hesitation, Beatrice quickly pulled Ava in until her face was pressed into Beatrice’s neck, and two arms enveloped her torso.
Ava closed her eyes and breathed Bea in. She always smelled so good in the morning, untainted by the world and just simply her . “How did you sleep?” Beatrice asked quietly as she pressed her face into the top of Ava’s head.
“Good,” Ava sighed. “I always sleep well when I’m with you.”
The happy hum Beatrice gave in response told Ava all she needed to know. Beatrice agreed wholeheartedly.
When fingers began gently dancing across Ava’s back, Ava decided to let her hands wander too. She trailed light, teasing circles over Beatrice’s abdomen. Once she starts, it’s nearly impossible to stop. Beatrice’s skin is just so soft and warm, and the way it jumps when Ava accidentally tickles her is the best feeling in the world.
Ava likes to touch. Always. Because there was a time when she couldn’t feel, and now she wakes up every morning with the reason that she can. It feels like touching fate, in a way. Isn’t it just so pretty to think that all along, this person was made for her?
Beatrice likes to touch too, but Ava’s pretty sure the reason is different. They’ve never explicitly talked about it, but Ava knows she’s the first person Beatrice has been allowed to touch without judgment or expectation. So sometimes, even when Beatrice is gently touching Ava in ways that she would call sexual in any other context, Ava just lets her fingers find whatever she wants to feel.
In mornings like this, Ava doesn’t ask for more. She doesn’t ask for more intention or something explicitly meant to make her feel good. She just lets Beatrice touch because she deserves an hour without expectations. She deserves more than that, actually, but Ava can only guarantee this hour, so she does what she can.
“I’m excited to act with you again, finally,” Beatrice shared, pulling Ava gently from her thoughts.
During the last two weeks of filming, Bea mostly worked alone. They had to backtrack in the movie to film scenes that occurred earlier in the story in Elsie’s home— Elsie writing, agonizing over where to hang Celeste’s painting, and breaking down when she receives the award she left behind in the mail.
That was one of the worst days for Ava because the wretched cries that left Beatrice’s body while she held the small glass puck felt way too real. Ava knew for a fact that the pain Beatrice was expressing came from a sincere place deep in her soul. The inability to completely escape a legacy no matter how much she left behind— no matter how hard she worked to separate herself from it.
There would never be a world in which Beatrice’s past— and those who hurt her— wouldn’t haunt her.
Yasmine made Ava step away from the set when she started crying, watching her girlfriend sobbing on her knees. Ava held Beatrice tighter than she ever had that night when they got back to the hotel room.
“We’re getting so close to the end, huh?”
“Just two more weeks,” Beatrice affirmed in that tone she uses to hide her sadness. Her hand had trailed down to run blunt nails over Ava’s lower back and butt.
“I know that stories like these are our chosen art form, but sometimes I wish…” Ava trailed off. She wasn’t sure how to put words to this feeling.
“That we could see what happens after the story ends?” Beatrice finished for her. Ava’s always still so surprised by how easily Beatrice understands her.
“Exactly,” Ava mumbled. She let her own fingers trail down to tease at the curls between Beatrice’s legs. The actress hadn’t trimmed since they arrived in Ireland and was, as a result, sporting a happy trail up to her navel. It was, without a doubt, the hottest thing Ava had ever seen.
“Well, it could have been worse…”
Ava pulled back to look up at Beatrice. “What do you mean?”
“The studio wanted Yasmine to rewrite the ending of this story to be more open-ended and allow room for a sequel. They asked her to do it way before we even started filming.”
“They were already thinking about a sequel?” Ava asked quietly. While she was glad that Yasmine hadn’t rewritten anything, it was strangely comforting to know that the studio believed in this story enough to think about continuing it.
“They believed in you,” Beatrice whispered.
“They believed in us,” Ava corrected.
Beatrice just laughed softly. “I never asked, but I don’t think a sequel is entirely off the table, just no sequel that changes this story. Maybe one day we’ll return to Celeste and Elsie.”
“Anything to work with my favorite actor,” Ava smiled.
The way Beatrice’s eyes softened impossibly more made Ava fall in love for the millionth time. She had never known a love as pure as this. “We still get to work together for at least two more weeks, darling.”
“Nothing wrong with having hopes for the future.” Ava leaned forward and pressed her lips to Beatrice’s. The kiss was gentle, always so gentle in the morning, but Beatrice’s warm mouth wrapped around Ava’s bottom lip made the whole world stop all the same.
“Nothing wrong with that,” Beatrice agreed against Ava’s mouth. And even though they didn’t say anything else, Ava knew they were thinking about the exact same future. Not just one filled with successful careers but one filled with love permeating everything they ever did. Together, forever and ever and always.
~
“Camila asked that you give her a call sometime today when you get a chance,” Mary shared while they waited in the hotel lobby for production to pick them up.
Over the last two weeks, the group had perfected a routine without even discussing it. Since neither Mary nor Lilith had an international driver's license, production had to drive Ava and Beatrice to set. The mansion they were filming in was about forty-five minutes from the hotel, so one of their friends always came along just in case Ava or Beatrice needed something since they wouldn’t be able to get to Ava and Beatrice. Mary and Lilith mostly traded days, but Shannon had filled in once or twice as well.
Usually, whoever joined them for the day just sat and waited in Beatrice’s trailer all day. If Ava and Beatrice needed privacy (not like that— just to talk), they would go to Ava’s trailer to be alone. It was strangely comforting to have found a routine that worked so well without a bunch of trial and error.
“Sure, I can call her in the car. Did she say why?” Ava asked as she wrapped her arm into Beatrice’s and held her bicep. Beatrice’s posture immediately softened when Ava leaned into her.
“She didn’t,” Mary mumbled as she leaned against the wall and turned to Beatrice. “Lilith asked that you get back to her about the audition requests she sent you last night by the end of the day, too.”
“I will,” Beatrice nodded. “There are just so many to get through.”
“You’re a hot commodity, Bea,” Ava teased as she bumped her hip into her girlfriend.
Beatrice rolled her eyes fondly. “I just forgot what this part was like, I guess.
This part was all a bit foreign to Ava, too. They were about to finish this project which meant both Ava and Beatrice were starting to look for their next role. Beatrice had told Ava that she would probably work several more acting jobs before In This Life even premieres.
Ava was used to the grind of auditions, but suddenly she was getting specific invites to audition for roles. And now that Ava had spent time in a part that felt genuinely fulfilling, random scripts for a medical drama or a police procedural felt second-rate. Beatrice had encouraged Ava to keep trying different things even if they didn’t come as easy as Celeste because she was still early in her career, and she didn’t want to be typecasted.
It was good advice, but Ava wasn’t exactly against being typecast for a character like Celeste. But it was fun laughing with Beatrice at night when they were both practicing for self-tapes with bad dialogue and worse characters. Even if those auditions meant they wouldn’t be working together, at least filming their auditions was just one more way to spend time together.
So, even though she understood the audition process, Ava was overwhelmed that directors were asking for her to audition— at Yasmine’s recommendation, Ava learned at dinner one night.
“I spilled tea all over our couch working on a self-tape last night,” Ava had laughed between sips of a Guinness.
“How are you so clumsy?” Lilith asked sarcastically.
“The character was supposed to be clumsy! It was some lawyer’s assistant— brilliant but bad at everything else. Comedic relief or something!”
“Oh, for Erica’s project? I’m so glad she reached out to you!” Yasmine smiled wide.
“Yeah, how did you know?”
“She called me asking if I knew any younger actors looking for a new project, and I recommended you!”
It made Ava’s heart clench that Yasmine saw enough potential in her that Yasmine was bragging about her to other directors, but Ava was pretty sure Beatrice was even prouder. The sex they had that night was so good that Ava was sore for two days.
“Oh, and you have a package? Do you want the hotel staff just to put it in your room or have one of us pick it up for you?”
Fucking finally. Ava was genuinely worried that their dildos would arrive after they left Ireland because of how long they were taking.
“In our room, please,” Ava smiled. Then, when Mary nodded and looked down at her phone, Ava turned to shoot a playful wink at Beatrice. She rolled her eyes harder than Ava had ever seen her do, but the gentle smirk revealed her true thoughts on the subject.
Just then, the familiar white van from production pulled up in front of the automatic double doors of the hotel. The production assistant waved at them through the window.
“Ready?” Beatrice asked quietly as she bent down to pick up Ava’s backpack.
Ava took it with a smile. “Whenever you are.”
Mary nodded toward the door before walking out in front of them. It wouldn’t do much if photographers were waiting for them, but Mary and Lilith still attempted to shield the two of them whenever they walked out of the hotel.
They weren’t hiding, but Ava and Beatrice still tried to minimize the opportunities for the paparazzi to catch photos of them. Only when their need for normalcy outweighed their need for privacy did they go out without someone to cover them. And that usually was in the form of dinners in back rooms at restaurants or a walk in the middle of the night, which didn’t result in the best pictures anyway.
There were a few photos of them floating around, but none were obvious signs of a relationship. In fact, Ava had ventured to Twitter one day in her trailer, and a very grainy photo of Beatrice giving Ava a piggyback ride on the way back to their hotel popped up on her timeline. The gossip account tweeted, “Girlfriends Ava Silva and Beatrice Lin-Watson seen traipsing around Wicklow desperately in love.” All of the replies were variations of “You can barely even tell that’s them,” and “A piggyback hardly means they are in love,” and “I’m tired of all these rumors that are never true.”
They were girlfriends traipsing around Wicklow desperately in love, but the fact that gossip blogs were struggling to report on their relationship filled Ava with glee. Beatrice didn’t even want to know if there were pictures making their rounds, so Ava was happy to keep everything she read a secret. Jillian and Shannon hadn’t said anything either, which meant there wasn’t anything particularly concerning spreading.
When they stepped out of the hotel and into the van, Beatrice holding Ava’s hand a little tighter as she pulled Ava with her, Ava didn’t hear any clicks of a camera. They all settled into the bench of the van, Ava in the middle of Beatrice and Mary, and the production assistant pulled out of the driveway as soon as the door slid closed.
“Good morning!” The production assistant greeted them with a quick glance in the rearview mirror.
“Hi, hi!” Ava smiled. “How are you?” Beatrice’s hand gave Ava one final squeeze before she released it in favor of holding the inside of Ava’s lower thigh.
“Good, and yourself?”
“Can’t complain,” Ava agreed as she fished her phone from her back pocket. She quickly patted Beatrice’s wrist to get her attention. “I’m going to call Cam. You okay?” She asked quietly. Every once in a while, Beatrice still got anxious on drives like this. It usually happened after a less-than-stellar night of sleep or if other things were on her mind, but Ava always checked just in case.
“Go for it,” Beatrice smiled softly. Ava blew her a kiss before dialing Camila’s number. Before she could hit the call button, though, Beatrice reached out and pointed to the crack still spidering across Ava’s screen. “We need to get you a new phone,” she chuckled.
“I kinda like it, though,” Ava laughed. It was just one more memory of that fateful phone call that brought Ava her soulmate.
“I’m sorry. Are you risking cutting yourself on broken glass for sentimental reasons?” Mary asked sarcastically.
“It’s fine!” Ava defended. “It still works!”
“Kid, you can afford to buy a—”
“Oops, I pressed call!” Ava cut her off as she lifted the phone to her ear.
Mary was right. Ava could absolutely afford to buy a new phone— but for the first time in her life, Ava had people that relied on her for financial stability. Sure, Shannon technically worked for Jillian’s PR firm so she could find another client if necessary, but Ava was paying Mary out of pocket.
So, sometimes when her doubts crept back up, and Ava worried that she wouldn’t find another role after this one, the thought of having to fire Mary as her assistant kept her up at night.
“Ava?” Beatrice caught her attention at the same time that she heard Camila calling her name through the phone.
“Ah shit, sorry. Got distracted,” Ava said to Camila. Then, she turned to give Beatrice’s forearm a gentle squeeze. “Thank you, I’m okay,” she mouthed.
Beatrice leaned a little further into Ava to keep her grounded. That was her perfect girlfriend. Even when Ava said she was alright, Beatrice tried to comfort her. “Hi Cam,” Ava greeted.
“Good morning!”
“Good morn— wait, isn’t it like the middle of the night there? Shit, go to sleep. I’ll call you back later.”
“No!” Camila laughed. “No, it’s okay. I was up anyway.”
“Why?”
“My only client and my girlfriend are on the other side of the globe. It would be weird if my sleep schedule weren’t a little off right now,” Camila sighed.
Ava leaned her head over onto Beatrice’s shoulder. She was reading an email from Lilith on her phone. “I guess so. Please tell me you are sleeping, though.”
“I am. Cross my heart,” Camila chuckled.
“Good,” Ava replied. “So, what’s up? Mary said you asked for me to call?”
“I did! Have you talked to Yas yet today?”
Uh, oh. Did Ava do something wrong? “Not yet. We are on our way to set now. Is everything okay?” At that, Ava felt Beatrice shift her attention back to Ava's conversation, thumb pausing mid-scroll.
“Everything’s great, don’t worry,” Camila chuckled. Ava let out a sigh of relief which only seemed to make Beatrice more nervous in turn. Ava did her best to gently comfort her girlfriend by rubbing her free hand up and down the actress’s forearm.
“Okay,” Ava chuckled, and that was the sound that made Beatrice finally relax again.
“She sent me an audition request for you. I wanted to call it out so it didn’t get lost in the sea of all the other self-tapes you’ve been doing.”
“Yasmine requested I audition for something?” Ava questioned. She would gladly work with Yasmine again in a heartbeat, but she hadn’t expected the possibility to come again so soon. Ava could also see Beatrice smiling in the reflection of her phone. God, what did she do to deserve someone that supportive?
“Yep! Her next project starts soon, and one of the actors pulled out at the last minute, so they are looking for a replacement— it films in New York, so you don’t need to change any plans you might have after this film wraps.”
Shit, Ava hadn’t even considered that there was a chance she and Beatrice would be working on projects in different places. She had pictured that they would move back into Beatrice’s apartment, never to sleep in separate beds again. Their days would be full of “honey, I’m home!” and “you’ll never guess what happened at work today,” as they lived happily ever after.
The idea of falling asleep in a hotel bed with the love of her life across the country or, even worse, across the globe made Ava sick to her stomach. Ava hadn’t been in New York for almost three months. She couldn’t go three months in a separate bed from Beatrice.
“Darling?” Beatrice whispered, and Ava realized her hand had left Ava’s thigh to tug at her chin gently. Ava lifted her head to meet her girlfriend’s eyes.
“Ava?” Camila questioned on the phone.
“Sorry, Cam, give me one second,” Ava choked out.
Beatrice looked at her with furrowed eyebrows, obviously confused at what could have made her anxious. But instead of asking, Beatrice just took one long exaggerated breath for Ava to follow along with.
And Ava did because, of course, she did. And her fears shrunk because they always do when she breathes with Bea. The possibility of different projects in different locations was a new challenge for them, but it wasn’t a challenge Ava was willing to lose. So, they would handle it if they needed to handle it.
Ava nodded to show Beatrice she was okay before gently intertwining their fingers. While holding eye contact, Ava spoke again. “Sorry, Cam. I’m back.”
“Everything okay?” Camila asked.
“Yeah,” Ava sighed. “I’m okay.” She took another deep breath and slumped down into the seat. Beatrice’s thumb began gently circling over Ava’s. “Tell me more about this.”
“Sure! It’s a murder, revenge, female rage story,” Camila explained.
“Well, I love the sound of that.” Ava’s heartbeat was finally slowing again. “What’s my role?”
“You’re the original murder that sets the plot in motion,” Camila laughed. “Yasmine is looking for someone who can get the audience to fall in love with them quickly, so the audience believes that the main character’s descent into revenge and rage is justified.”
“I would love to get murdered!” Ava exclaimed. The resulting look of deep concern and confusion from Beatrice was incredibly endearing. “Sorry, hold on,” Ava laughed, all anxiety forgotten in an instant.
She pressed her hand to the microphone and leaned over to whisper in her girlfriend’s ear. “It is just a movie, don’t worry.”
Beatrice still shook her head in disdain. “You are not allowed to get murdered,” she mumbled, seemingly legitimately sad at the possibility. God, she is so cute.
“I will do my best,” Ava joked. “Sorry, Cam. I’m back.”
“Beatrice got sad at the idea of you dying, didn’t she?”
Ava outright snorted at that comment. “Maybe…” she drew out the word.
“You two are adorable,” Camila said, and Ava could hear the genuine smile through the phone. “Anyways, the audition is for the role of Este— the main character’s best friend.”
“Wait, let me guess! My husband is cheating on me?” Ava laughed. At this point, Beatrice had just given up on even pretending to read the email from Lilith. Ava couldn’t help but laugh at her.
“Bingo,” Camila chuckled. “I’ll send you the instructions for a self-tape, but I just wanted you to know that was Yasmine’s project when you get to it.”
“Alright, I’m on it. I will make sure to give it my best,” Ava agreed. “Now, go to sleep, please?”
Camila cleared her throat with a sigh. “Sure thing, talk soon.”
“Talk soon!” Ava agreed before hanging up. Beatrice was just staring in confusion. Ava could feel Mary attempting to stifle her laughter. “I’m going to need your help on an audition,” Ava chuckled.
“You are not allowed to die,” Beatrice insisted, unamused by the joke.
Ava squeezed her hand with a gentle smile. “Only in movies, I promise.” It wasn’t a promise Ava could keep, they both knew it, but it was more about the sentiment than anything else. They had a long, long life to live together.
Ava dropped her head to rest on Beatrice’s shoulder once more, and Beatrice’s head came down to lean on Ava’s.
~
Although they had spent the last two weeks in Wicklow already, Ava was still surprised with how perfect the weather was all the time. The mid-July sun was beaming down on them, but it mixed with a gentle breeze to make it feel like early spring in New York. Ava had taken off her shoes to dig her toes into the soft, deep-green grass of the lawn of Elsie’s mansion.
They weren’t filming outside, but between all the cameras and crew setting up inside the mansion, the only place Beatrice and Ava could be out of the way was out on the lawn. So, they were sitting in their chairs (Ava still wasn’t over the fact that there was a chair with her name on it), studying their scripts while they waited for Yasmine to call them over.
The mansion was beautiful. Tall walls of vibrant red brick peeking through thick vines of ivy, only broken by frosted glass windows, towered over them. And despite what Beatrice’s apartment looked like, Ava could picture the actress living in an old mansion like this. It definitely suited Elsie.
When Ava watched Yasmine dip out the mansion's front door and start walking loosely in their direction, Ava cleared her throat to catch Beatrice’s attention and bent down to slip her shoes back on. “Yas is coming,” Ava explained.
Beatrice hummed and sat up a little straighter while she adjusted the collar of the loose tan blouse she was wearing. It was buttoned up to her neck, and it did nothing to stop Ava from letting her eyes trace the lines of Beatrice’s throat as they dipped below the fabric.
“How are we feeling?” Yasmine asked when she was within earshot. She was still glancing down at the script in her hand as she walked.
“Doing well,” Beatrice answered politely. “You?”
“I can’t believe we are almost done,” Yasmine chuckled as she rolled the script up in her hands. “Oh, I like this,” she gestured to Ava’s outfit. “You look great!”
“Well, I didn’t pick it out, but thank you,” Ava laughed. She was wearing loose light-washed jeans, a tight black V-neck shirt that made Beatrice stare at her cleavage, and a chunky tan knit cardigan over the top.
As if on cue, Ava caught Beatrice checking her out in her periphery. Ava shot a smirk in her direction to show Beatrice that she had been seen. The resulting pink that flushed her face would sustain Ava for the rest of the day.
“Of course! Did Camila talk to you?”
Ava tucked her script under her leg. “She did! Thank you for thinking of me!”
“Secretly, I’m glad the other actor didn’t work out… I don’t think it was quite right. I need someone with a slightly more optimistic personality,” Yasmine explained.
“Well, I will give it my best shot!” Ava smiled wide. She could feel Beatrice beaming too.
“Not as interesting of a role as Celeste, but I think you could find a way to have some fun with it!”
Ava could agree with that for sure. She knew that she hadn’t gotten the role yet, but the idea of getting covered in fake blood sounded kind of fun.
“So, any thoughts on this one?” Yasmine gestured to the scripts they had both just been reviewing.
Beatrice dropped her head to skim over her script one more time. Ava already had a question ready for Yasmine. “I am a little confused on what specific tone you want from Celeste here… I could see this being read as angry, but that doesn’t feel quite right.”
Yasmine hummed. “I agree. Angry doesn’t really fit. I would say it’s more insistent and a little frustrated. You know you’re in love with Elsie, and Celeste is fairly certain that Elsie is in love with her too. And you know that she’s using the awards and the painting to hide something she doesn’t even want to hide anymore.”
“How clued in am I that Celeste sees through all of that?” Beatrice asked, leaning forward on her chair.
“What do you think?” Yasmine offered. She did this often, and Ava was always grateful. She gave them a lot of agency to interpret these characters how they saw fit.
“I think she knows deep down. She’s just convinced herself that she doesn’t know or that she’s misreading it all.”
“Works for me,” Yasmine chuckled. “We’re on the downslope now. Their romance is an inevitability, not just something that could potentially happen in the right circumstances. Trust your instincts.”
Beatrice took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay, I’m all set then. Ava?”
“Me too,” Ava agreed. When Ava wasn’t acting, believing she could trust her instincts was hard, but for some reason, they always got there once Yasmine called action.
“I would only say let the moments linger a little longer than you naturally would. We can edit things to be shorter in post, but we can’t make them longer,” Yasmine explained as she stepped away to indicate that Beatrice and Ava could head inside.
“Patience,” Beatrice sighed as she stood up. “Understood. You ready?” Beatrice reached out to place a hand on Ava’s mid-back when Ava stepped beside her.
“Lead the way,” Ava smiled. And Beatrice did, even though Ava knew precisely where they were going. She just wanted an excuse to check Beatrice out now too.
The inside of the mansion was hotter than it was outside in the summer sun. Between the dozens of crew members, the hot lights, and the lack of AC, it felt like walking straight into a wall of heat.
They were filming a scene in Elsie’s living room—a small space with a plush emerald green couch and a dark oak table. There was a mantle along one wall that housed dozens of poetry awards and, most prominently, Celeste’s painting in the center.
Ava made sure to search through the sea of awards for the small glass award that caused Elsie so much pain. It was half-tucked behind another award, clearly an attempt to hide it. Hidden but still distinctly on display.
Ava felt Beatrice step into the space next to her and follow her eyes to the award. The energy between them was suddenly somber.
“Hey, Bea?” Ava whispered. For some reason, Ava felt an overwhelming urge to remind her girlfriend of something.
“Yes?” Beatrice tilted in her direction.
Ava pressed their shoulders together, keeping her eyes on the award. “You are more than a legacy to me.”
The shaky breath that Beatrice sucked in told Ava everything she needed to know. When Beatrice’s hand found Ava and held on tight, she knew she had said what Beatrice needed to hear.
“I know.”
“I love you,” Ava whispered so quietly she could barely hear herself.
And then, even quieter, Beatrice replied, “I love you, too. Forever and ever and always.” She squeezed Ava’s hand with every word.
They took one long breath together. Ava wasn’t sure if it was on purpose or if they were just that in sync today. Then, they tentatively let go of each other’s hands and took their places on the couch without another word.
While Yasmine ran the crew through a few last-minute checks, Ava and Beatrice just sat staring at each other. Looking into Beatrice’s eyes, the stars in her eyes shining brighter than the lights around them, caused everything to fade away for a while. Only when Yasmine caught their attention again did either of them move.
“Ready,” Ava agreed as she crossed her legs and leaned against the arm of the couch, facing the painting.
Beatrice mirrored her position. “All set.”
“Okay, then! And action!”
“Thank you for inviting me, Elsie. Seriously,” Ava sighed.
Beatrice looked slightly more guarded than she had been right before Yasmine called action. “Of course, Celeste. You invited me into your space. It was only fair to return the favor.”
“We’re past favors, aren’t we?” Ava chuckled. She let her gaze be drawn up to the painting and then back to Beatrice. She was playing with her fingers in her lap.
Beatrice took a deep breath and dropped her gaze to her hands. “I suppose so.”
Ava’s eyes pulled back to the painting once more, and this time she let her entire body follow that tug as she slowly stood. “You put it on display?” Ava asked nervously.
“I told you,” Beatrice spoke quickly. “It’s a masterpiece.”
Ava walked around the coffee table bearing a simple tea set and stopped to stand, staring up at the painting on the mantle. She felt Beatrice’s eyes follow her. After several long breaths, Ava spoke again. “But it—”
“Why won’t you paint it again?” Beatrice cut her off. Ava snapped her head back to the actress, who was suddenly standing. Ava hadn’t even heard her move.
“I told you,” Ava repeated Elsie’s words back to her. “I don’t want to.”
“But it—”
“Why do you want me to?” Ava cut her off.
Beatrice immediately shrunk down into herself. It was at moments like this that Ava secretly cursed herself for how much she loved that woman. Because Beatrice looked terrified, and Ava knew she was acting, but it didn’t stop Ava from wanting to reach out and do everything she knew brought Beatrice comfort.
But instead of intertwining their fingers, instead of whispering sweet nothings, Ava just took a deep breath and stared— trying to express all the love she could through just her gaze. And she waited, partially because Yasmine told them to go slow and partially because it was Beatrice who was supposed to speak next. But mostly because so very slowly, Beatrice lifted her head to look Ava in the eyes once more.
And they both stared, for what was likely the tenth time today, pouring out so much love that they couldn’t put into words.
“If you want it back, just say the word,” Beatrice whispered as if she didn’t want to say it.
Ava finally pulled her gaze away and returned to the painting of the two women on the beach. She realized now that Celeste was supposed to be the woman floating above the snow-covered sand— hand in hand with Elsie, whose feet were planted by the sea. “I would paint you a thousand more paintings before I ever dared to ask for this one back,” Ava replied wistfully.
Then, right as Beatrice closed the distance and stood beside her at the mantle, Ava’s gaze dropped down to the award. “Is that…” She reached out to grab it.
“Oh, you don’t—” Beatrice paused as soon as Ava’s hand wrapped around the object. She sounded like a kid caught with their hand in a cookie jar. “Well, you know…”
“This is the Legacy in Poetry award,” Ava held it up while she turned to Beatrice. There was just the slightest hint of anger in her voice, not at Elsie. It was just that Celeste and Ava alike hate talking about legacies. “Why do you have this?”
“They mailed it to me,” Beatrice ducked her head and mumbled. Her eyes were glistening with tears, and Ava’s mind flashed to the memory of watching Beatrice sob while holding this exact same award.
“Okay, but why is it on display?” Ava softened her tone slightly.
From this angle, Beatrice almost looked embarrassed. “It’s an important award in the poetry space, Celeste.”
“Yeah, but I thought we weren’t going to define our legacy by awards like this.”
Beatrice lifted her head at the same time that a single tear escaped her eye. It took all of Ava’s strength not to reach out and wipe it away.
“That's what my words are worth,” she replied as she gestured half-heartedly to the award.
“You’ve come too far to let some name-dropping sleaze tell you what your words are worth,” Ava insisted.
“Celeste…” Beatrice breathed as her shoulders dropped.
“Ask me.” The dark-haired woman’s eyebrows immediately furrowed, but she didn’t say anything. “Ask me what your words are worth,” Ava insisted again.
And from Beatrice’s eyes, Ava could tell that Elsie already knew the answer to the question she would not— could not— ask. She knew deep down exactly what Celeste would say, and only because allowing herself to believe it was scarier than hiding would she not say anything at all.
And Ava hoped that with her eyes, she was telling Elsie anyway.
Beatrice took the award out of Ava’s hand and walked straight out of the room. Ava watched as she disappeared out of sight before she released a shaky exhale. Her eyes were pulled one last time to the painting on the mantle, and she stared as if she was staring at the love of her life.
“Cut!” Yasmine yelled, and the space was flooded with sound and harsh lighting again.
Beatrice reappeared in the doorway and immediately handed the award back to a production assistant to reset the prop.
“Ava, Beatrice, are you okay to go right into another one? I want to give it another try before I give you any notes.”
Ava glanced from the director and back to her girlfriend, who was already having her makeup fixed. “Uh, yeah. Just— one second!” Ava held up a finger as she stepped off in Beatrice’s direction.
“I’m good,” Beatrice called before she caught Ava’s eye. She looked confused about why Ava was walking in her direction. “Ava?”
“Hi, sorry, I just…” Ava stepped into her space and wrapped Beatrice in a tight hug. The makeup artist stepped back out of their space momentarily.
Despite her confusion, Beatrice immediately hugged her back. “Is everything okay?”
Truthfully, Ava wasn’t entirely sure why she was suddenly overcome with the urge to hug Beatrice. Maybe it was all the talk about legacy, perhaps it was just because she could, but Ava just softly nuzzled her face into Bea’s neck and held her tight. “Yeah, I just love you so much.”
“I love you too, darling,” Beatrice whispered before she kissed the top of Ava’s head.
“Forever and ever and always,” Ava sighed as she pulled back.
“Forever and ever and always,” Beatrice agreed with a warm smile.