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Sighing, he put away the paper he was reading and was about to move onto the next one when he became aware of the door slamming with a strong shove, heavy steps echoing on the floor as curses left his mouth. Work long forgotten as he knew something was wrong, Oliver got up and strode to where his son was muttering words to himself, in time to catch a glimpse of his annoyed expression and tensed body as he stormed into his room. Oliver shook his head, knocking on his door when he came to a halt. “Connor, please open the door.” He said, not to startle him, but to show him he was there for him no matter what.
“It’s open.” His reply came a second later and wasting no time, Oliver stepped inside and settled down on the bed next to him, studying his face for any sign that could tell him what had happened.
The boy didn’t look at him just rubbed his fingers together like he did all those years ago when frustration broke into the surface. Seeing his pained look that reminded him of her, his tormented heart twitched in his old frame, his eyes closing to shake away the invading thoughts.
“What happened?”
Connor exhaled deeply and stayed still, burrowing his brows as he tried to put his problem into words. Just like for his father, expressing his emotions was never one of his strengths. Keeping his eyes on him, Oliver waited patiently, his mind wandering off to the possibilities of what caused his son’s mood.
“I don’t understand her, Dad.” He started, not looking up, but playing with his fingers nervously, gathered words of sadness and irritation leaving his mouth a second later. “At one moment she acts like… like she is interested in me and in the next one, it’s like I’m a stranger to her. And I don’t know what to think anymore or what to say to her. I don’t even know how I feel about her anymore.“
A small, knowing smile appeared on his lips, barely noticeable, but still playing on his face as memories of a similar case popped up in his mind. “You know by the time I was your age, everyone had a girlfriend and was in love while I was all alone because of my previous bad reputation. Of course I had friends, but I had no idea what it felt like to be in love and I would have given anything to know that. To love someone and to be loved by someone.” Oliver stopped, a wave of warmth spreading through his body, the memory of that day still clear in his head like the fresh dew in the mornings. “That’s when I saw her walking into my class. Your mother. She was stunning and the sun danced behind her making her look like an angel. She was more beautiful than I could have ever dreamed…”
His mouth hung open, literally, breath stuck in his throat as he took in her from toes to head, blue eyes meeting blue ones and the world vanishing, focusing only on her gaze as she walked further into the room. He hadn’t noticed she was waving a hand in front of him until someone pinched his arm slightly to bring him back to real life. He suddenly heard her sweet voice asking if she could tell him a wonderful thing and as a shiver sprinted down his spin he felt a new sensation in his veins running through him, the knowledge of the unfamiliar feeling that could only be described as love at first sight hit him like Cupid’s arrow and he blinked a few times, attempting to calm his thundering heart.
“What’s your name?” She asked again something, and he shook his a tad, turning her attention only on her instead of his whirling emotions.
“Oliver. It’s Oliver.” He somehow managed to say his name, spelling the letters becoming a difficult job as his enchanted mind didn’t want to work properly.
She then smiled, flashing the most beautiful smile he had ever seen in his life and his heart skipped a beat. Swallowing hard, he waited for her to continue whilst staring into her breathtakingly intense blue eyes. “Oliver, I called out to you at least five times and…” She stopped, eyebrows narrowing. “And you are staring at me now like an enamored puppy and God help me I didn’t just say what I did. I’m not indicating anything here because you can’t possibly be in love with me, nor love me since we have just met and I think I’m going to shut up now before saying something even more embarrassing.” She looked away from, but he still couldn’t take his eyes off her until he noticed she was biting her lower lip in a painful manner. Or it looked like that. Either way, Oliver was long gone and before he could think of his actions, his hand moved on its own accord and brushed her skin, her pink lips parting as a reply.
Their gaze connected and words were lost, as then and there nothing else seemed important only the two of them watching each other.
Oliver heaved out a long, trembling breath. He could still remember the feel of her skin for the first time, still remember the first time their lips met, remember their first dance and remember the first time they fell into bed, sharing love and passion for hours, still remember the day of their wedding like it was yesterday. He could still remember them all clearly without any forgotten moments, but even then, all of those afterimages seemed far away like a fantasy, a beautiful tale. “I’m only telling you this now, because life can do terrible things sometimes and I need you to understand that.”
Connor nodded, blinking rapidly to fight back the tears, knowing exactly how the story would end.
“As you probably heard this from me a few times, we became friends quickly and we went out a lot after school. Drinking, laughing and watching the stars at nights until we were older and I asked her out. She, of course, said yes and after that, everything just happened. Back then, I was too young to notice and to dump to care, because that love couldn’t be compared to anything. She was my everything and that is why…”
Walking under the light of a thousand stars with linked fingers, Oliver let out a happy, content sigh, sure of what he wanted to do and where his heart lay. The moon lit up the place he chose for that night - where he had also taken her out for their first date - creating a romantic vibe in the air, the cool wind spreading unsaid words as they kept moving.
That night and darkness, with the stars, candles and the light of the moon, made everything marvelous. Their dinner was peaceful and in the atmosphere with love they joked and teased each other just like years ago, until Oliver stood up and took her hands, moving away from the table. “Can I ask you a wonderful thing?” He asked, stroking her arms up and down, and with her nod, he smiled at her and she smiled back, then not wanting to hold back anymore, Oliver let go of one hand and kneeled down, getting a small jewelry box from his pocket.
He couldn’t even open it fully before he heard her gasp as he started to talk. “I made you this present to show my love and because I realized I can’t live without I you. You make me happy with your rambles, small gestures and everything that is you. I love you with all my heart and soul and I want to prove that till the rest of my life so, Felicity Smoak, would you do the great honor and become my wife?”
“Now son, I’m not telling you this to make you feel sad. With this story I just want to teach you a lesson that one day you will learn as well. I just hope and pray that you will learn that differently.”
“Oliver.” She approached him after stepping out of the hospital room, face wet with tears, eyes shining with sadness. “Can I tell you a terrible thing?”
“Please tell me, it’s nothing serious.”
“I wish I could, but it’s too late.” Another tear escaped her eyes, as she grabbed his hand for support, the news breaking her as much as it was breaking him.
“How long do you…?” He couldn’t finish that sentence. If he did, it’d all become reality and he couldn’t believe that. It had to be a sick joke, a terrible nightmare.
“A couple of weeks.” He wanted to tell her no, beg and scream until his vocal cords couldn’t work anymore because that couldn’t be happening. Not to them and not to her.
Not even time was in their favor because those weeks passed in a minute and her illness got her to the ground all of a sudden, with Oliver barely having time to catch her before the floor could bruise her.
“It's not your fault, Oliver. So, don’t blame yourself.” She whispered, voice breaking at the last words as a sob erupted from throat, tears slipping down her face with the pain intensifying. Soft thumbs caressed either side of his face, trying to bring him back to reality, trying to calm him down before she would lose him forever.
“It wasn’t your fault. It had never been your fault in the first place and there was nothing you could have done. Life is just... unfair. It does terrible things, but Oliver, you have to know that you were the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. You and our son. You were with me the whole time and for that, thank you. But, please, when I’m gone, don’t lose it. Keep it together for his sake and know that it wasn’t your fault.” Her vision blurred from tears, lungs burning as she kept forcing herself to breathe, needing to tell him what she felt before it’d be too late.
“No, Felicity, save your energy. You have to keep fighting. Don’t leave me. You can’t.” His desperate voice echoed in her ears, and she smiled at him, her shaking hands weakening as the end crept closer, the pain in her abdomen fading away. “The help is on the way, please, just hold on for a little bit more.” He begged, clutching her hand and entwining her fingers with his, the coldness flooding from her skin scaring him as the sirens got closer.
“I will never forget you, my hero.” She murmured, eyelids closing.
“No!” He shook her body, trying to keep her awake till the paramedics got to them. “Felicity, don’t you dare!” He cried out in desperation, clutching her body tighter, not willing to accept that that was it, her time on Earth ran out and she had to leave him against her will.
“Please, Felicity.”
With the last bit of strength in her body, she squeezed his hand and whispered. “I love you, Oliver.” Her voice quieted down, arms going limp, as they fell to her sides, the gates of heaven opening for her and taking her soul, the last breath leaving her chest as Oliver sobbed over her body, pleading for her to come back to him.
He could hear his baby’s cry in the background, hear someone kicking in the door and rush into the house around them, but his gaze was only on Felicity’s lifeless body, her still chest , chilling body and pale skin .
“NO!” He shouted, hugging her to him, unable to understand what had just happened or if it really could be true. That God would take her away from him.
“I loved her with every fiber in my body, but she was taken away from me. From us.” Oliver said between tears, feeling as if something warm was on his shoulder whilst he was only imagining it. “So, if you can choose, choose to walk away. Don’t live the horror I had to.”
“Dad…”
“I know that doesn’t happen every day, but I wouldn’t be able to bear to see the same happen to you. But if you can imagine a life with her, if you want to know what it’s like to really love someone, fight for her. Don’t let her slip away and pray that you get the chance to grow old together.”
“Thank you.” Connor replied, wiping away the traitor teardrops and hugging his father. He patted his son on the back and watched him leave, waiting until he heard the sound of the door closing, before getting up and looking out of the window, staring at the sky and white clouds.
“Until we meet again. I love you and miss you Felicity. Every single day.” He whispered, not even caring about the tears anymore, just imagining her again.