Chapter Text
"So you know how I forgot your birthday this year?"
Joe glanced up at Pete. To his knowledge, they hadn't been having a conversation before.
"Has there been a year when you remembered my birthday?" Joe asked in response. Pete ignored him.
"Well, happy late birthday!" Pete cheered, and opened a closet door to reveal-
Marie.
She stood there in silence, rocking on the balls of her feet and biting back a grin. She stared at him, her face brimming with anticipation, and it took just a little too long for Joe to realize he was supposed to be excited.
"Hi, babe!" he brightened up and smiled as wide as he could force himself to. Pete looked confused and concerned in the background, but said nothing.
“Everything okay, sweetie?” Marie asked. Joe forced another smile in her direction.
“Everything’s fine,” he said. Pete flinched just slightly at the lie. “Could you just give me a moment with Pete?” Marie nodded, shrugged, and carried her suitcase into Joe’s room. Joe slowly turned his gaze on Pete.
“What’s wrong?” Pete asked, his tone somewhere between nervous and affronted.
“You. Invited. Marie.” Joe paused after every word, his teeth gritted.
“What’s wrong with that?” Pete asked. He backed up slightly into the couch, visibly trying to distance himself from Joe. Joe’s lips pulled back into a snarl.
“Check the calendar,” Joe demanded in a whisper. Pete didn’t bother to check the calendar that he had put up in the kitchen of their shitty apartment. Instead, his eyes popped wide open as realization dawned on him.
“You haven’t told her?” he gasped. “It’s the full moon tomorrow and you haven’t told her?!” Joe’s fingers curled in until his knuckles were white.
“No,” his voice was taut to the point of snapping.
“You’ve been dating for over a year!” Pete cried.
“We’re long distance!” Joe yelled. “It never came up!”
“How does turning into a mythical canine once a month never come up?!” Pete demanded.
“We’re long distance!” Joe screamed again.
“Hey, is everything okay?” Marie asked, popping her head out the door. Joe gave her a weak smile.
“Everything’s fine,” Joe lied weakly, giving her a thin smile. She smiled back reassuringly, and threw her arms around his neck. It was going to be a long weekend.
***
“God, it’s so hot here,” Marie noted. They were out on a walk, supposed to be catching up. Joe knew he was probably being rude, but he was mostly silent, brooding, trying to figure out how to get around shifting around her,
“Mmm,” Joe hummed in agreement.
“Because, you know, it’s snowing in New York,” she continued, sighing. “Everything is so Christmas commercialized. Rockefeller tree, all that shit.”
“Mm hmm,” Joe nodded. He only had to turn for, what, a few minutes? If she’d say yes to watching a movie with all the guys and him, he could sneak into the bathroom, turn and turn back before she noticed.
“And since the dorms in the city are so expensive, my friends and I were thinking of maybe getting an apartment,” she continued.
“That’s nice,” Joe said, uncertain of what she had said. Maybe he could even go out on a pizza run, that would give him plenty of time.
“Maybe a luxury loft, overlooking Central Park,” she teased, trying to get his attention. She kicked the side of his leg playfully, stumbling a bit. “My rockstar boyfriend could probably afford that, right?”
“Definitely,” Joe chuckled, present enough to still be sarcastic. “You know me. Rolling in the dough.” Marie gave him a sad little smile.
“Should I have told Pete to not waste the money?” she asked.
“What?” Joe asked, startled.
“You’re not really into this, are you?” she asked, gesturing around them with a shrug. “I mean, I’m trusting you’re decent enough to break up with me if there’s another girl, so are you just too busy with work?”
“No, sweetheart, it’s not like that,” Joe protested. He felt guilt twisting unpleasantly in his stomach, but he didn’t know how to explain this away.
“You’re distracted by something,” she said. “And not to sound selfish or anything, but this was a bit of a long trip, I know you’re busy, but I had hoped you could break for a bit.”
Well, if nothing else, Joe liked her honesty.
“That’s fair,” Joe said. “I’m just really stressed tonight, but I swear I’ll chill out in a day or two.”
“I trust you,” she said, leaning into him. “Now, come on, show me around town!”
“I’ll try not to get lost,” Joe promised, smiling down at Marie. Good God, he was so in love. Leave it to lycanthropy to ruin something else.
***
To Joe’s surprise, his plan went without a hitch. He offered to pick up pizzas midway through The Princess Bride, and while Marie thought it odd that he would voluntarily miss some of the movie, she did not investigate. He was able to change, change back, and grab food without anyone noticing. He was shocked but pleased. He came back with a stack of pizzas in the middle of the rodents of unusual sizes scene, and Marie curled up in his lap. Joe was tired, still sore from the shift, but he felt warm and safe when he was close to her. Like things would be alright.
Of course, it had to be too good to be true.
The five of them finished the movie. Marie got along amazingly with the whole band, arguing politics with Andy and talking shitty 80’s movies with Pete and Patrick. She wasn’t exactly one of the guys, but they all wanted her around. They all stayed up talking until early in the morning, when Joe half carried her to the bedroom.
“You seem happier already,” she murmured sleepily.
“You make me happy,” he breathed out against her neck.
“It’s not that,” she said, her eyes fluttering closed. “Tell me someday?”
“I will,” he said. “I promise.”
A few hours later, however, Joe awoke to the sound of a heavy, rhythmic banging on the door. Marie stirred next to him, and upon waking, clutched the covers up to her neck in a panic.
“Is this normal?” Marie asked as the insistent banging on the door got louder.
“Nope,” Joe groaned, falling out of bed and pulling on the nearest pair of shorts he could find. The banging continued with shouting accompanying it as he hurried to get dressed.
“WHORES AND INFIDELS, SODOMISTS AND WITCHES, ALL OF YOU WILL BURN!” shrieks came from outside.
“Do you want me to come with you?” Marie asked.
“I’ll be fine,” Joe assured her, leaving the bedroom and swinging open the front door.
A short, wiry haired old woman stood on the stoop, her finger trembling as she pointed at Joe.
“The creature I sent,” she hissed, “was a message sent from God! And you treat it as a common house pet!”
“What?” Joe asked, his voice thick and his eyes bleary.
“The fuck you mean he was a message sent from God?” Andy said from behind Joe. Joe turned and, to his horror, saw the slug creature he had vomited up in a mason jar with holes poked in the lid.
“LARVAE ARE NOT PETS!” the woman shrieked. “And you, you sinners, you demon-! You must pay,” she hissed. She pulled a long, thin knife out from the folds of her skirt, and took a step closer to Joe.
Andy lunged forward to attack her, but the old woman moved very quickly, whipping out a squirt bottle and spraying him in the face with something. Andy screamed and fell to the floor, steam rising from his face.
“What did you do to him?” Joe asked in terror.
“Holy Water works wonders on demons. As does silver!” she made to stab him again, and Joe lurched away just in time, his instinct kicking in as he shifted mid jump. She gasped in horror, almost dropping her knife, and Joe jumped on top of her, pinning her to the ground and snarling in her face. Though he weighed distinctly less as a wolf than he did as a person, he was still more than strong enough to hold her down. He howled, hoping to wake Pete or Patrick and get one of them to come out and help him.
The woman struggled underneath him, whispering breathless Hail Mary’s as he held her down. He was vaguely aware of her crying, but he was so angry. She was the reason for his pregnancy, pain, and humiliation? The reason Andy was in pain? There was no reason to show her mercy, and the wolf side of him urged him to tear her throat out with his heavy claws while he could.
Before he could act on such an urge, he felt Patrick behind him, heard Patrick’s voice in his ear telling him to move aside, he and Pete had the situation under control, and he reluctantly stepped to the side. He shifted back behind the couch and tied a blanket around his shoulders, toga style, while he watched in righteous vindication as Pete and Patrick tied the old woman to a chair.
Joe’s wide smile lit up the room until he looked to the bedroom door and saw Marie standing in the doorway, blanket still clutched up to her neck, and a horrified look on her face as she stared at him.
***
“So how did you sick the larvae on him?” Pete asked. He was staring directly into the woman’s face, and both of their eyes were glowing gold under Pete’s demand of “Tell the truth.”
“The power of prayer,” she replied.
“Prayer to what?” Patrick muttered under his breath. The woman didn’t hear him, or only answered to Pete: Joe couldn’t tell which. He was sulking in the back next to Andy, who was icing his face. It was red from the burn of Holy Water, but not scalded off, as it would have been if he were fully vampiric.
Marie had slammed the bedroom door shut, and while Joe wanted to immediately talk to her, Pete convinced him that perhaps they both needed some time to cool off.
“What was your intention in coming here tonight?” Pete asked. Joe could still hear the resonating charmspeak in his voice, but Pete also sounded weary. Too much use of his power was taking a toll on the poor guy.
“To kill you demons!” the woman choked out, sounding as though she was crying again.
“You should forget about us,” Pete declared, lounging back in his chair. The gold was fading fast. “Move to another town. A safer town. Go to a nice church and forget about us, okay? We’re not doing any harm.”
“Not doing any harm?” she repeated.
“No harm,” Pete said. “Just help.”
“I think… I should leave you be.” she declared, and Patrick cut the ropes around her wrists and ankles. She stood up and walked out of the door solemnly, and Pete sank into the chair, weariness emanating from him.
“You okay?” Patrick asked.
“Crazy bitch is as stubborn as you,” Pete laughed weakly. Patrick rubbed his shoulders, and Joe turned on Andy. The sun was rising in the distance, and Andy looked tired and small, but Joe was furious at the entire world, and Andy was at least one person in it.
“You kept that thing?” he spat. Andy winced.
“He didn’t hurt anyone,” Andy said, holding his hands up.
“It hurt me,” Joe yelled.
“Not intentionally!” Andy protested. “It’s kind of sweet, actually. More fuzzy than slimy now.” Joe growled.
“Fine, it’s yours,” he said, pouring venom into his voice. “I’m gonna go to bed.” An even more miserable thought.
“Good luck,” Andy said with a small smile that Joe didn’t return. He opened the bedroom door to find Marie still up, sitting cross legged in the middle of the bed. Her night shirt rode up to nearly her waist, and she looked very small in that moment.
“Hey,” she said.
“Hey,” Joe said, giving her a tiny wave.
“We should talk,” she said, patting the bed next to her. Joe sat down, still just wearing a blanket. His clothes were intact, but he had never bothered to put them back on, something he felt strangely self conscious about now. She’d seen him in less before.
“So… are you cool with the term ‘werewolf’?” she asked.
“That’s what I’ve been using, yeah,” Joe said stiffly.
“Okay,” she said, nodding. “That’s… different.”
“Uh huh,” Joe said, staring at the covers.
“Is this just on full moons, or is it whenever you feel like it?” she asked.
“Both,” he said, still not meeting her eyes.
“It’s weird,” she said, and Joe braced himself. “But kind of cool.” He looked up hopefully.
“Cool enough to not break up with me?” he asked. She scoffed.
“I’m not gonna break up with you over something silly like a difference in species!” she laughed. Teasing him. But her voice grew softer as she grabbed the sides of his face. “I love you, silly. Whatever you are.”
Joe ended up sleeping more soundly than he could ever recall that day, temporarily content with his furry problem.