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Megumi didn’t know why they were doing this.
Sure, he knew why he and Yuuji were telling their friends that they were dating. It was practical in the sense of avoiding any future awkward blunders, like out-of-touch comments or calls of “Megumi’s getting hit on! Formation B!”
Plus, if he could allow himself to be sentimental, he wouldn’t mind holding Yuuji’s hand while walking around campus or being forced to shop with Gojo and Nobara. It certainly would make the latter situation much more bearable.
What he didn’t know was why Yuuji insisted on approaching their “targets” (his words) one by one to divulge this information. He was very interpersonal and intent about his relationships. Perhaps it had something to do with how his grandfather had raised him. Megumi could only speculate.
Nevertheless, he still much rather wished that they could’ve just sent out a mass text. It would surely have saved him from all the “We’re so proud of you”s and the (horrible) reminder from Ieiri to “Use protection!”
Megumi shuddered at the memory from all the way back to that morning. Luckily, there was only one person left on their (Yuuji’s) “List of People to Tell ;P”. That did not mean that Megumi looked forward to it.
The two of them walked to the common area of the dorms where he would be meeting them. Megumi remained exhausted, but Yuuji somehow maintained his cheery energy as he spoke up.
“You know, I’m really glad that Kugisaki took it well.”
Megumi raised an eyebrow.
“Why wouldn’t she have?”
“Well, you never really know sometimes with people unless it comes up. Plus, not to be stereotypical, but she did grow up in a small town. Those people aren’t always the most progressive.”
“That’s not why I asked, Yuuji. I asked because you’ve literally walked in on her making out with Maki.”
Yuuji tilted his head, giving a blank stare.
“Isn’t that something girls normally do at sleepovers?”
Sighing, Megumi reluctantly responded, “You watch too many movies. Also, I thought you told me that happened in the middle of the day.”
The cogs turned in Yuuji’s brain until it clicked.
“Oh yeah, you’re right! Wait, I should go talk her about what it’s like dating someone in the Zen’in clan, and if there’s any fancy traditional sorcerer courtship etiquette I should know—”
Before he could wander too far off, Megumi grabbed Yuuji’s sleeve and tugged him back in the direction they had been going.
“You can do that later. He’s probably already waiting for us.”
They only had a little further to walk before they reached the common area. Sitting down already waiting for them was none other than Toudou Aoi himself.
“Brother!”
“Bro!”
Megumi was unable to recognize what he witnessed after they hugged, but determined it was probably some mix of gang signs, handshakes, and potentially some new hip-hop dance move. He waited until they settled down at least somewhat, which fortunately didn’t take nearly as long as he expected (only about five minutes). Unfortunately, that moment came when Toudou noticed him.
“Brother, what is he doing here?” Toudou spat.
“That’s actually what I wanted to talk about,” Yuuji stepped back over to where Megumi had waited, grabbing his and taking it in his own, and continued, “Megumi and I are dating.”
Toudou fell to his knees, face appalled, and voice letting out a delayed gasp, almost as if he forgot some of his own dramatics. Megumi didn’t realize someone could look so heartbroken when they found out their friend was with someone.
“Whoa, Toudou, don’t tell me you’re—”
Toudou jolted up, snatching both of Yuuji’s hands (including the one that had been holding Megumi’s own), and clasped them around his own hands, and—was he crying ?
“Yuuji, my brother, I assure you I would never judge you for liking another man. However—”
He pulled a baffled Yuuji “aside”, which given the constrained size of the room was only about seven feet away from Megumi. Given how loud they whispered, however, the whole act of separating themselves from Megumi was pointless.
Toudou resumed, “Fushiguro unfortunately is not a person I can support you being with.”
“Why not? He’s a really great guy who—”
“What is the most important question to ask when you meet someone?”
Yuuji, still confused, asked, “What?”
“‘What is your taste in a guy or girl?’”
“Oh yeah that one!”
Itadori lit up as he remembered this quirk of his friend, seemingly forgetting to defend his boyfriend’s honor.
“When I first met Fushiguro, I gave him a fair chance to answer the question. I even told him I wouldn’t judge if he preferred guys!”
Yuuji nodded along as if in the middle of a class lecture. The puzzled face then swapped over to Megumi, who couldn’t fathom the interaction he was watching unfold.
“He gave a most dastardly response…”
Yuuji gasped. While his boyfriend’s stupidity could be charming at times, Megumi found himself questioning his own tastes as Toudou had, just for entirely separate reasons.
“He claimed to not have a particular preference, instead only care about a person’s character.”
Yuuji gasped again, whipping his head to face Megumi.
“Megumi! You’re not an ass guy?”
“What,” Megumi deadpanned.
“If I asked you tits or ass, you’d seriously answer personality?”
“Yes?”
“You’re not even, like, a thigh guy or something?”
“Yes? Again? I don’t know what you’re getting at.”
Itadori sighed, and dropped his head. When he looked back up, his eyes seemed to plead, as if begging Megumi not to commit a crime. He was not aware that not being an ass man was apparently punishable by two to three minutes of puppy dog eyes from his boyfriend.
“Yuuji, you have got to be joking.”
His expression cracked a little, and that’s when Megumi knew he had him.
“Guess I’m going to have to see if Kugisaki’s free to go see Sharknado Five with me later today,” Megumi stated in a voice that did not even try to hide the fact that he was baiting Yuuji.
Yuuji broke completely.
“Oh, come on Megumi! You know Global Swarming is my favorite one of the franchise!”
After giving Yuuji a Look , he gave in completely. He glanced back at Toudou, giving him a small wave.
“Sorry Toudou, we’ll have to talk more about this later!” Turning to face Megumi, Yuuji grabbed his hand to hold again, and proudly told him, “We’re going to want to head out soon—I wanted to check out that new café with you before it starts!”
Megumi walked off with him, but not before glancing over his shoulder and noticing Toudou staring back with a grim determination plastered over his face.
~~~~~~~~~~
Yuuji waved goodbye to Megumi as they arrived back at the dorms, only to be ambushed upon entering his own room.
“Brother! How could you!?”
Toudou had bolted up from where he had been laying down on Yuuji’s bed, shaking the few brain cells that remained out of Yuuji’s head.
Right. Toudou’s staying with me while he’s training under Nanamin this week. At least that hopefully gives me time to talk some sense into him.
“Dude, relax. I promise Megumi is really cool. I’m sure you’ll like him once you get to know him!”
Toudou’s face remained sullen. This was not going to be as easy as Yuuji had hoped.
Wordlessly, he dragged Yuuji out of the dorms, taking him outside where the sun had just begun to set. Yuuji knew it would be pointless to protest, so he let his shoes get scuffed as Toudou pulled him in tow.
As they arrived at an open enough area, Toudou dropped Yuuji and brought up his fists.
“Really Toudou? Are we going to literally fight over this?”
Not offering a response, Toudou swung at Yuuji, who ducked and took a step back. Composing himself, he charged forward in retaliation, only for Toudou to jump up and clap. With his balance thrown off from his surge and now having had swapped places with Toudou, Yuuji tumbled in midair and fell flat on his face, eating dirt.
After spitting the grass out of his mouth, Yuuji complained, “No fair, Toudou! I thought we were just going to be doing regular sparring, nothing with cursed techniques.”
Toudou continued to gaze at Yuuji, his expression almost saying: This hurts me more than it hurts you .
Fine, if that’s how he’s going to play…
Watching his positioning, he waited until Toudou walked up closer to him. He seemed to hesitate as to whether to offer Yuuji a hand to help stand up, and in that moment, Yuuji slammed him with divergent fist. Toudou stepped back at the first impact, then went tumbling toward the trees as the second one hit.
“What’s so wrong with Megumi’s type being based on personality anyway?”
Toudou clapped his hands again, switching their positions. Sat up against a tree, Yuuji saw Toudou dashing toward him. He struggled to stand up because of the awkward way he had landed so that Toudou had almost reached him by the time he got up.
“You know why I ask people their types, right brother?”
Toudou nearly landed an uppercut to Yuuji’s jaw, only missing his target because Yuuji dodged, but still managed to graze his shoulder.
“Yeah, it’s to see whether people are boring, right?”
Yuuji swept Toudou’s legs, but he clapped again before he fell, causing Yuuji to slam against the ground. From this position, however, he was able to kip-up and smack Toudou in the process.
Toudou’s expression went from solemn to delighted as the fight progressed, wiping some sweat from his forehead.
“Exactly. And I don’t want you stuck in a boring relationship.”
“Trust me, Megumi is anything but boring. Even Sukuna is weirdly fascinated by him.”
Toudou went for a roundhouse kick that connected and sent Yuuji a few steps back. He smiled as his eyes distantly focused on the setting sun.
“He’s just…”
Before he could finish, Toudou finished him off by charging him, grabbing the back of his uniform and kneeing him in the solar plexus. Out of air, Yuuji crumpled to the ground, wheezing.
“That’s enough for today. Clearly you’ve gotten too distracted. We can talk more later.”
Toudou began walking away back to Yuuji’s dorm where he was staying. When he finally caught his breath enough to stand up, he made his way to the dorms but stopped in front of his own door.
Maybe I’d better stay somewhere else for tonight…
When Megumi opened his door, he immediately started asking questions about why Yuuji looked so beat up. He hadn’t even realized all the dirt and blood that had gotten on him. He brushed off the questions, though, telling Megumi he’d explain tomorrow and that he just wanted to rest right now.
(Megumi made him wash up and change before he could, though).
~~~~~~~~~~
When Yuuji had explained what had happened the night before over breakfast, Megumi couldn’t believe that Toudou was still genuinely upset over this.
“He seriously felt the need to physically fight you over this?”
“That’s what I said!”
Megumi took another bite of his cereal (that he ate dry, which is perfectly fine, Gojo) as his boyfriend inhaled some more of his own breakfast before continuing to ramble.
“By the way, I hope you realize I was just messing with you yesterday. It’s totally cool if you’re not a tits or ass or even thigh guy. I know you’re cool. You know why?”
Yuuji leaned in across the table, nearly touching Megumi’s nose with his own.
“Why?”
“Because you’re dating me!”
Yuuji beamed as he made that declaration. He gave a quick kiss to the tip of Megumi’s nose before sitting back in his chair.
Megumi tried to hide his flustered face with his hands, which only made his boyfriend laugh. Once he composed himself more, however, he realized something.
“I’m going to go talk to him. I think I might know a way to get him to butt out of your business.”
Yuuji stood up, about to protest, only stopping when he noticed who arrived through the door. Megumi had already gotten up and was facing their new guest.
“Toudou.”
“Fushiguro.”
Megumi noticed Yuuji tensing up from the corner of his eye. He refocused his attention on the man in the doorway, however, and took a breath.
“Listen, Toudou, before anyone fights again, can we just try talking for a bit first?”
He mumbled something along the lines of “Exactly what a boring person would say,” but did end up sitting down at the table. He chose a spot next to Yuuji and put his feet up on the opposite chair, almost as if trying to get between Megumi and his boyfriend and prevent them from being together. Megumi did his best to ignore how childishly he acted.
Oh well. Here goes the stupidest idea I’ve ever had…
“Can you ask me the question again? I think my answer might have changed.”
Yuuji’s eyes sparkled, forgetting the pre-existing tension, and asked, “Wait, are you a closeted ass man Megumi? Is this your coming out?”
Megumi just gave a dead stare to Yuuji, but then closed his eyes and sighed. He really couldn’t blame Yuuji for thinking that. It was, after all, not the furthest thing from what he was planning.
“Just ask the question again.”
Toudou folded his arms and raised a brow. Megumi hoped he was at the very least intrigued enough to go through with his request.
After several moments of contemplation, Toudou responded, “I suppose I can. So, Fushiguro Megumi of the Zen’in clan…”
Wow, he is full-naming me. I can’t believe he takes this that seriously .
“...What is your type? In men or women?”
Megumi stared fiercely into Toudou’s eyes as he answered: “My type is Itadori Yuuji.”
Toudou’s eyes widened. Yuuji squealed and got up to hug Megumi, which made it difficult for Megumi to maintain intensity. When Toudou let his face fall in defeat, Megumi turned to face Yuuji and hugged him back. He couldn’t help but smile while Yuuji crushed him in his arms and rambled comments like “I didn’t know you could be such a romantic, Megumi!”
His brief moment of contentment was interrupted when he finally noticed Toudou again, who had flopped onto the floor and now crawled over to Megumi. He almost looked like a zombie from those apocalypse b-movies Yuuji made him watch.
When he arrived at Megumi’s feet crying, he bowed down properly, forehead to the floor, and begged, “Fushiguro! Please forgive me! While I first doubted you, it seems that you have the most impeccable taste, for only the best would have their taste be of my brother!”
Toudou acting deeply apologetic and ashamed concerned Megumi more than any of his prior antics did. He felt more embarrassed at Toudou’s actions now than he did confessing his “type”, and he wanted this feeling to end as soon as possible.
“Toudou, we’re all good, you can stand up now.”
Unfortunately, that was not enough, as he continued to sob and beg for mercy on the ground. He eventually needed to get Yuuji’s help to forcibly get him to stand.
“Please, at least allow me to offer a hug as a new sign of camaraderie for my future brother-in-law.”
Megumi couldn’t even process that statement as his bones got crushed in a hug by Toudou (he quite literally heard several cracks that he might need Ieiri to check out). Yuuji joined in, making any attempted escape on Megumi’s part impossible.
When he was finally released, he and Yuuji left the dining area since they had already finished eating. Yuuji took his hand as they made their way to the infirmary to make sure his bones were, in fact, intact.
“All in all, I don’t think that’s the worst reaction.”
Megumi snorted a small laugh and immediately regretted it as it made his ribs feel like they were skewering his skin. Yuuji wrapped his arm around Megumi’s waist to support him.
“I don’t know Yuuji. After that, I don’t think I ever want to tell anyone else we’re dating again,” Megumi joked, but part of him (his aching bones) meant it.
“You WHAT ?!” A voice from one of the rooms they had walked past called out.
Gojo’s head peaked out into the hall, flabbergasted and full of indignation.
Yuuji met Megumi’s eyes as he realized something key.
“We forgot to tell Gojo-sensei.”
Staring back and realizing what fate would befall them if Gojo got to them, Megumi commanded, “ Run .”
Yuuji scooped Megumi onto his back, which wasn’t what he meant, but it would overall be better for both of them to avoid the wrath of Gojo. They raced over to Ieiri’s, where she would hopefully manage to keep Gojo, who was now fervently chasing them, back.
Megumi supposed that maybe Toudou’s reaction really wasn’t the worst.