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Louis didn’t remember much from the party at his frat house on Saturday night.
He forgot where his T-shirt disappeared to, he couldn’t recall how he ended up on the roof and he definitely had no idea why he thought a shot of Fireball followed by two shots of tequila would be a good idea.
There was, however, one thing – or rather, one person – that Louis remembered very clearly about the Sigma party. And that was Harry.
He remembered seeing Harry walk in, and instantly recognizing him as the boy in his literature class. He couldn’t forget Harry’s long, brown, wavy hair and how his jeans had a rip in the left knee. He could still picture Harry’s thin, flowery shirt with the top three buttons undone, and his brown, worn-in ankle boots, as well.
Louis’ favorite part about Harry was how he had seemed to tower over him while the two of them had briefly spoken at the party.
When Louis had gone up to him, he remembered thinking how much he wanted to see Harry’s face when he came and how crazy his hair would be in the morning.
Unfortunately, he never got that chance, as Harry had shot him down at the first sign of Louis’ flirting, something Louis was reminded of when he saw Harry walking on campus.
Louis was currently sitting in the middle of the academic quad, under one of the old oak trees.
He and Niall were “studying” for their upcoming midterms.
Louis glanced up and did a double take as he spotted Harry, who was walking out of the Fine Arts building.
Harry put the hood of his jacket up before pulling a cell phone out of the back pocket of his jeans.
It was a pretty simple action, but Harry’s long legs and easy strides made it look so smooth.
Harry glided over the sidewalk, and Louis couldn’t take his eyes off him; even more so when Harry tripped over seemingly nothing.
Louis snorted back a laugh when Harry looked around to see if anybody had noticed his misstep.
Niall heard the noise Louis made, and followed his gaze over to Harry, who was walking away from where they were sitting.
“Oh, isn’t that the guy who rejected you at the party on Saturday?” Niall asked.
“He didn’t reject me. He just didn’t feel like flirting.”
“Yeah, if that’s what you want to call it. I just remember seeing you go over there, and him walking away a minute later.”
“No way in hell that happened.”
“That’s what I saw. Then you went upstairs with Jeremy Martin like, an hour later.”
“That was the same night?”
“Yeah,” Niall answered slowly. “Hate to break it to you.”
“Maybe that’s where my shirt went…”
“Somebody threw your shirt up onto the roof toward the end of the night, and you, like an idiot, went up to get it.”
“Is that why I was up there?”
“Do you remember anything from that night? It happened last week.”
“Not really,” Louis admitted. “I remember him, though. Harry.”
“Shame, because Harry probably doesn’t remember you.”
“Fuck you.”
“Nah. I don’t sleep with people I love, remember?”
Louis smiled at Niall’s remark.
About a year ago, Niall had come out to him as aromantic.
Louis could still remember the look of relief on Niall’s face when he realized there was a name for what he was, for why he could have sex with people, but never felt the need or desire to fall in love with them; why he just didn't feel it, the romance, unlike some of the other people he'd been involved with.
“I’m not a slut, I swear!” he would always tell their frat brothers when they found out he slept with someone new.
Once Niall explained exactly what aromantic was, and how his feelings for anyone would stay platonic, at most, Louis understood why Niall actually did mean it when he said that he loved Louis.
He really did, but as a best friend, and nothing further.
And that was OK, because Louis felt the same toward Niall.
The two of them had rushed the fraternity when they were freshmen, and had gone through the awkward initiation tasks together.
Now they were seniors, graduating in May, soon to take on the real world.
“You’re funny,” Louis said.
“I know. Damn sexy, too.”
“OK. Let’s not push it now.”
---
The following weekend, Louis’ frat threw another party. This time, it was in celebration of the end of midterms.
As if they really needed an excuse.
“Count!” Louis ordered as two of his brothers lifted him up by his legs. He took hold of the top of the keg and waited until a third brother placed the tap in his mouth.
He heard the crowd around him starting to count as he started drinking.
The beer rushed into his mouth and, at first, he struggled to find an easy rhythm.
He finally did around the eight-second mark, and continued chugging.
“Come on, Lou!” he heard yelled for him.
“Ten more seconds! Let’s go!”
“Thirty-five, thirty-six, thirty-seven, thirty-eight, thirty-“
They didn’t finish, because Louis swallowed what was in his mouth and spit out the tap. He heard a lot of yells and applause as he was lowered to his feet.
“You did it, Lou!” Niall yelled as he rushed up to Louis and pulled him into a hug.
Louis groaned, feeling all of the beer swishing around in his stomach. “I feel disgusting,” he spoke into Niall’s ear.
“Who cares? You beat Mikey’s record by four seconds!”
“I’m gonna feel it in the morning, too.”
“Relax,” Niall told him as he pulled back, letting other partygoers get in their words of praise. “Get another drink; you’ll be OK.”
“Such a good friend.”
Niall just shrugged as Louis turned to accept everyone’s kind words of his proud ‘accomplishment.’
He let out a loud burp just as he saw Harry walk in from the kitchen. He didn’t even know Harry was there. He must’ve missed him come in.
Louis wondered if he had watched the keg stand.
Once everybody was done talking to Louis, he looked around, trying to locate Harry again.
Louis found him in the back of the room, talking to a guy in a white Henley with big arm muscles and brown hair quiffed up in the front.
Louis briefly wondered if that was his boyfriend before walking over anyway.
“Hey! You’re Harry, right?”
Harry raised his eyebrows at him, but smiled nonetheless.
“Yeah, I am,” he answered.
“I’m Louis. You having a good time?”
“Hey,” Arm Muscle Guy nudged Harry. “I’m gonna get a drink. I’ll be back.”
“All right, Liam.”
Liam smiled briefly at Louis before pushing his way toward the kitchen.
Good, Louis thought to himself.
“To answer your question,” Harry said, “I’m having a very good time. Impressive keg stand you just did there.”
“Oh, that? Thank you. I’ve been practicing for years.”
Harry laughed. “I can see that; it’s a valuable skill.”
“Thank you. Glad my training has been put to good use.”
Louis was thrilled when Harry laughed again.
“So, you’re in my Literature class, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, I am,” Harry smirked.
“Oh, I thought so!”
“Yeah, you asked me the same thing the last time you tried to hit on me.”
Louis’s eyebrows shot up and his lips slightly parted. “Oh?”
“Yeah. Like, two weeks ago? The last time you guys threw a party. I think you still had a shirt on at that point.”
“That damn shirt,” Louis muttered to himself.
“It’s OK. I’m really not looking for anything anyway.”
“Why’s that?”
“It’s just easier that way,” Harry said.
Before Louis could ask what that meant, Harry continued with, “Besides, there’s um, a guy back there who’s been eyeing you up the entire time you’ve been talking to me.”
Harry tilted his head forward, indicating to Louis to look behind him.
Across the room, Jeremy Martin was leaning against a wall, and he was, in fact, looking Louis over.
Louis rolled his eyes.
He turned back around to talk to Harry. “Hey, listen, he’s not-“
He stopped when he realized Harry was no longer in front of him. He looked around the crowded living room, confused at how Harry had escaped his eyesight so quickly.
“Fucking Jeremy,” he grumbled lowly.
---
On Monday morning, Harry sat in his regular front row seat in his Literature class.
The professor walked in and greeted everyone before placing his bag on his desk and getting out what he needed for the day.
A moment later, Harry saw Louis creep inside the room.
Louis looked around, looking for an empty seat, but found that the only available ones were in the front.
Harry kept his head down, not looking at Louis as he sat down in the seat right next to him.
“Hey,” Louis whispered as he took off his jacket.
“Hey,” Harry said back. “Fancy seeing you here.”
“Yeah, I know. Usually I’m asleep in the back by now.”
Harry smiled at Louis and turned his attention to the professor, who had just begun speaking.
The lecture was boring, as usual. Louis could barely stay awake listening to the professor’s slow, baritone voice.
His attention was captured at the end of the hour, however, when he said that he had graded their midterms and was, overall, very pleased with how they turned out.
He started handing them back, and Louis looked around, seeing most of his classmates smiling at their grades.
He snuck a glance at Harry’s test when he got it from the professor, and his eyes bulged nearly out of his skull when he saw that Harry got a 95.
“Not bad, Tomlinson,” the professor said to Louis as he gave him the exam.
Louis looked at the red grade on the top right corner, and was happy with his 79.
“If you have any questions, feel free to ask me after class,” the professor announced. “Otherwise, I’ll see you Wednesday.”
Louis looked through the test, but since he hadn’t fully understood all of the material to begin with, he knew he wouldn’t have any questions about why he got the answers wrong that he did.
He looked over at Harry, who was reading a note at the bottom of his test. He was nodding as he did so, so Louis assumed it wasn’t a bad thing.
“Good job,” he complimented.
Harry quickly glanced up at Louis. “Hmm?”
“Good job,” Louis repeated. “On your test.”
“Oh. Thanks. Um, how’d you do?”
“Seventy-nine. It’s OK. Lit’s not my best subject.”
“Oh, yeah. Mine, either.”
Louis scoffed. “Yeah, OK.”
“No, it’s really not. Just… I don’t know. I had time to study. It’s not like I’m in a frat or anything to distract me.”
Louis paused, thinking over what Harry had just said. “Was that a dig at me?”
“Maybe.”
“Oh, you got jokes?”
“Sometimes,” Harry shrugged. “Few and far between, though.”
“Nah, I’m sure that’s not true.”
“No, really. Whenever I start to tell a knock-knock joke or something, my friends just groan, like it’s causing them physical pain.”
“Now that’s definitely a lie.”
Harry laughed. “It’s not!”
“It has to be. If it’s not, then you need new friends.”
“I think that from time to time,” Harry admitted.
“Well, look, I would let you tell me knock-knock jokes.”
“Oh, would you?”
“Yeah, I would. I’d even laugh at them, too.”
Harry just hummed. He cleared his throat before saying, “Well, I have to go. But, I’ll see you next time?”
“Oh. Yeah, sure.”
Louis watched Harry pack up his stuff and walk out of the classroom, leaving Louis alone with just his professor and a few other students who had questions about the midterm.
He also left Louis wondering why their conversation had come to such an abrupt end.
Unless, maybe Harry had figured out that Louis was trying to flirt with him again.
He really doesn’t like flirting, Louis realized sadly.
But it hadn’t been his fault this time. He hadn’t actually set out to flirt with Harry; it just sort of happened.
He resolved to stop that. He didn’t want to make the other boy uncomfortable, and definitely didn’t want Harry to dislike him.
God only knew there were plenty of people on this campus who didn’t like Louis; he didn’t need another one.
---
“Did you hear who Tomlinson did this weekend?”
Harry stiffened up at the use of Louis’ name a few rows behind him.
He was sitting in his Lit class a week later, waiting for the lecture to start. Thankfully, Louis hadn’t arrived yet, so he wouldn’t hear the topic of discussion.
It was two guys talking, and Harry remembered them from the last party at Sigma.
“Nah, who?” the second guy wondered.
“Apparently, he got with one of the girls in Zeta… and her boyfriend.”
“Damn. Lucky bastard.”
“Yeah, right?” the first guy asked.
“Thought Tommo was gay, though?”
“So did I. Maybe it doesn’t count if there’s another guy there?”
“Maybe. I don’t know how that gay shit works.”
Harry rolled his eyes at their conversation, and stopped listening as they started talking about something else.
It wasn’t the first time Harry had heard something like that about Louis. He sort of had a reputation around campus, and rumors seemed to follow him everywhere he went. Mainly, people said that Louis had a lot of sex, and wasn’t really boyfriend material. This was the main reason Harry didn’t want to respond to Louis’ advances, no matter how often Louis’ handsome face flashed through his mind.
It wouldn’t work out well for either of them.
A few minutes later, Louis came strolling in. He was right on time, but, once again, the only available seats were the ones in the front row. So he sat next to Harry again.
“Hey,” Louis smiled at Harry as he sat down.
“Hey.”
“You OK? You look a little pale.”
“No, I’m fine. How was your weekend?”
“Good,” Louis enthused. “Yours?”
Harry quickly glanced behind him to see the two guys he was sure had just been talking about Louis.
“Uh, all right, I guess. Not as good as yours, probably.”
“Nah. Probably not. My weekends are pretty legendary.”
Harry nodded and leaned back in his chair.
He let out a deep sigh as class began.
---
On Friday afternoon, Harry walked into the coffee shop a few streets away from campus.
He liked to go there on the weekends to get homework done since that was when his apartment building was usually the loudest.
When he walked in today, he was surprised to see Louis sitting at one of the tables in the back corner. He had headphones in and was staring intently at his laptop screen. His fingers were hovering over the keyboard, like he was ready and waiting for inspiration to strike.
Harry got in line to order his latte, the whole time, stealing glances at Louis, who looked cuter every time he looked over.
After he paid for his coffee, he stood near the counter to wait for it to be finished.
Harry glanced in Louis’ direction again, and, at the same time, Louis looked away from the computer.
Their eyes met, and Louis gave him a small wave and a smile. Harry returned the gesture, and when his order was ready, he took the cup and went over to Louis’ table.
“Hey,” Harry greeted.
“Hey,” Louis said, taking out his ear buds. “How you doing?”
“Good. Just trying to get some homework done. My building’s a bit loud.”
“Ah.”
“What about you? I’ve never seen you here before.”
“Yeah, I’m normally not here on the weekends. But, I’ve got a five-page paper due on Monday, and I haven’t started it yet. And my brothers are being a bit crazy at the house, so…”
“So here you are.”
Louis nodded. “Here I am. It’s not a total waste, I guess. I already have a page done.”
“That’s good. Only four more to go.”
“Yeah, but who knows how long those will take? I’m glad this place is open late tonight.”
Harry smiled at Louis, feeling slightly the same way. His work would probably take him a while to get done, too.
“Um, did you want to sit?”
“Oh. Uh…”
Harry looked over his shoulder. He could easily sit somewhere else; it wasn’t so crowded that he needed to sit with Louis.
But then he glanced back at Louis, who had a hopeful look on his face, and Harry knew the choice was pretty much made for him.
“Yeah. Sure.”
Harry took a seat across from Louis. He set down his latte and pulled a notebook out of his bag.
Louis started to put his headphones back in, but decided there was one thing he needed to do first.
“Can I apologize for something?”
Harry looked up from his notebook, confused at the sudden question. “Uh, sure?”
“I just… I wanted to say that I was sorry for hitting on you when it was clearly not wanted. And I want to apologize double for not remembering and then trying the same technique on you like, two weeks later. And, I guess, triple for the flirting in class last week.”
Harry smiled. “It’s OK.”
“It’s really not, but thanks. Um, I don’t know, I just thought you were really hot, so I thought I would just try to… Well, you know.” Louis cleared his throat before finishing up with, “Anyway. I’m sorry.”
“Thank you. That took guts.”
“Thanks. Yeah, you should feel my heart; it’s racing.”
“Why?” Harry asked.
“I don’t know. I thought you might laugh in my face or yell at me or something. Although, you don’t seem like that kind of person, so…”
“Yeah, I’m really not.”
You don’t seem like the person you’re supposed to be, either, Harry thought to himself.
“Can I ask you something, though?” Louis wanted to know.
“You’re just full of stuff to say today, aren’t you?”
“Kind of. If I’m annoying you, just tell me to shut up.”
“No, you’re fine. What’s up?”
“Well, the second time I tried flirting with you, you said that you weren’t looking for anything right now, because it was just easier that way. What did that mean?”
“Oh. You remember that?”
“Yeah, I remember everything about you.”
“Sounds a bit creepy,” Harry teased.
“It does, doesn’t it? I didn’t mean it to come out that way, though.”
“It’s OK. It’s kind of sweet.”
Louis smiled and waited for Harry to say something else.
“Well, when I said that, I figured that you intended for your flirting to result in some kind of hookup?”
Louis blushed slightly. “Maybe. If it got to that point.”
“Yeah. Well, I’m not interested in that.”
“Oh, shit,” Louis gasped. “Are you straight? Oh, fuck, man. You should’ve just told me to fuck off; I would’ve left you alone.”
“No, no, that’s not it. I like guys. I definitely like guys.”
“OK…”
“Louis, I’m ace.”
Louis snorted. “Kind of full of yourself, aren’t you?”
Harry stared at Louis for a second before he started laughing. “No, not- Not like that. I mean, I’m asexual. I'm not sexually attracted to anyone. I don’t want to have sex with anybody, and I don’t feel the desire to, either. I simply don't need that kind of physical interaction with another person.”
“Oh.”
Louis’ gaze flicked between Harry’s face and the table for a moment before he said, “Oh. Well, you could’ve told me that, too.”
“It’s not exactly something I go around broadcasting,” Harry admitted quietly. “It’s still not really all that common to hear, so I never know how people will react.”
“You told me.”
“I feel like I can trust you with that.”
Louis nodded. “You can. Definitely.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Harry took a deep breath and smiled at Louis, feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off his chest.
“So we can still be friends, right?” Louis wondered. “As long as I don’t hit on you any more.”
Harry chuckled. “‘Friends’ sounds good.”
“Cool."
“Yeah, cool,” Harry said to Louis before taking a sip of his coffee. "So... friend... tell me more about you. Something I don't know."
“Um, there’s really not all that much to tell. I have six younger siblings. That includes two sets of twins, by the way. My mom’s remarried to my second stepfather, although I consider my first stepfather to be my real father. Um, I’m in a fraternity; but you already knew that. Niall’s my roommate and also my best friend, but you probably knew that, too. Oh, I took piano lessons when I was younger, but I haven’t played in a while. I could probably play a simple song if I wanted to, but I’m sure I’d be really rusty. How about you?”
“Well, I only have one sister, and she’s older. My parents divorced when I was younger, and my mom got remarried a few years ago. My roommate’s name is Liam, and you’ve probably met him at the frat house at some point. I never learned how to play an instrument, but I’ve always wanted to play guitar.”
“Oh, my friend Niall plays guitar. I’ll make him teach you.”
“Well don’t make him. But if he wants to help me, I wouldn’t be opposed to it.”
“Well, clear your schedule, then. He’ll be teaching you ASAP.”
“OK, then,” Harry laughed, “sign me up.”
“Consider it done. OK, now, shut up, 'friend.' I have work to do.”
“You’re the one who interrupted our work time to make that cheesy apology!”
“It wasn’t cheesy. It was heartfelt!”
“Is that what the kids are calling it these days?”
“You’re the worst,” Louis said. “Besides, you asked me to tell you about me, and I did."
"Because if we're gonna be friends, I should know something about you. Don't you think?"
"Wow, you're pushy. Why am I friends with you?”
“Well, I believe you said that I was really hot, so…”
“I’m gonna regret saying that, aren’t I?”
“Probably. Now get to work.”
Louis grumbled under his breath, but did as he was told.
---
Over the remaining weeks of the semester, Louis and Harry became much closer.
Harry kept showing up at Sigma’s parties, and the two of them sat next to each other, by choice, in their Literature class.
They did regular friend things, like drinking together at the Sigma house and hanging out in Louis’ room or Harry’s apartment.
And now that Louis knew that Harry was asexual, his past rejections were much less damaging to Louis’ delicate male ego.
The problem was, now that Louis was getting to know Harry better, he really wanted to date Harry. Like, really wanted to. He just didn’t know if Harry would be OK with that.
It was the last week of classes when Louis addressed the topic.
The two of them were getting lunch together at the coffee shop.
"So, you ready for finals?” Louis asked.
“Nope. Not at all. You?”
“I guess. The one for Lit is going to kill me, though.”
“That will probably be my easiest one, believe it or not.”
“Why?” Louis wondered. “What else do you have?”
“A bunch of psychology exams and papers. I’m a Psych major. I’m studying to be a child psychologist.”
“Wow, that’s awesome.”
“Yeah. No, it’s great; it’s just a lot of research papers and observation hours, and it’s all very draining.”
“I hear you. Sociology with a Psych minor is no walk in the park, either.”
“You’re a soc major?”
Louis nodded. “Yeah, I want to be a social worker.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. There’s just so many kids in shitty homes and fucked-up situations, and they need someone there to fight for them, you know?”
Harry stared at Louis in amazement. Weeks ago, if someone had told him that Louis Tomlinson wanted to be an advocate for children’s safety and well-being, and aspired to be in an extremely frustrating and disheartening – yet highly rewarding – career after graduation, he would’ve thought they were crazy.
But here Louis was, proving to Harry once again that he needed to stop listening to what other people said.
“And you want to be that person?” Harry asked.
“I could be. Just have to keep working toward it.”
“You’ll get there; if you want it badly enough, you will.”
“Thanks. And you’ll be a great child psychologist one day, too.”
“Thank you,” Harry said honestly. “Hey, just think, we could work together, like some kind of child protective super team.”
“Saving the world, one kid at a time?”
“Sounds good. Think we could do it?”
Louis nodded. “Of course we could.”
His vote of confidence brought nothing but a smile to Harry’s face, which made Louis think that it would be a good time to approach the whole 'dating situation.'
He coughed before saying, “Hey, can I ask you something?”
Harry nodded, taking a drink from his cup.
“Do you want to go out with me? On Friday?”
Harry’s gaze fell from Louis’ face down to the table. “Louis…”
“Harry, I like you,” Louis admitted. “Like, a lot. Do you like me?”
“Well, yeah, of course I do.”
“Do you like me like I like you?”
“…Yeah.”
“So what’s the problem?”
“The problem is-” Harry started speaking, but cut himself off. He took a deep breath and said, “Do you remember what I told you a few weeks ago?”
“What? That you’re ace?”
“Yeah. That.”
“Of course I remember,” Louis answered. “You’re ace. That means you don’t want sex. Right?”
“Right.”
“Does that mean you don’t want to date, too?”
“No, it doesn’t mean that.”
“You just don’t want to date me,” Louis realized.
“No, it’s not that, either. I promise that’s not it.”
“Well that’s kind of what it feels like,” Louis said softly.
“I’m sorry; it’s just, I don’t know how it would work,” Harry confessed.
“…Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“I guess I can understand where you’re coming from with that.”
Harry nodded. “Sorry.”
“Stop saying sorry,” Louis laughed. “Don’t be sorry for who you are.”
Harry smiled even wider than he had before.
“Although, now I’m curious,” Louis told him.
“About?”
“Well, if I was dating you, what would I do?”
Harry bit his lower lip, his hesitation to answer the question clearly written on his face.
“What? Is it some big secret?” Louis joked.
Harry cracked a smile. “No, it’s not a secret.”
“Is it some exclusive club over who is good enough to date the great Harry Styles?”
“No,” Harry giggled. “Of course not. You really want to talk about this?”
“If you want to. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
“You probably will.”
Louis’ jaw slightly dropped.
He couldn’t believe Harry thought that. Why would he automatically think that Louis would make him uncomfortable?
“Not on purpose,” Harry said, noticing the Louis’ expression. “Just… OK. You want to talk about dating? Here it goes. Most sexual people don’t know what to expect when they date someone who is ace. Or demisexual, or aromantic, or any of the other sexualities on the spectrum. But at least with demi and aro, sex is a possibility for the two people after establishing some sort of connection. But it’s not for me. Just like someone who is aro won’t just change their mind and decide to start up a romantic relationship, I won’t just one day decide to desire sex because you’re good-looking and you deserve someone who’s sexual, too. I could have it to make you happy, but I don’t have to, and I don’t need to. I’m simply not interested in it, and it’s not your fault. I’m not someone that a guy like you would usually go for, so you might not know how to react.”
“What do you mean, a guy like me?”
“Well, you’re a sexual person, aren’t you? You like to have sex?”
“Well, yeah. Who do-“
Louis caught himself, about to ask the stupid question, ‘Who doesn’t?’ Judging by the look on his face, Harry knew what Louis was going to say.
“Sorry.”
“It’s OK,” Harry smiled. “I told you, it’s not your fault. It’s still not considered ‘normal,’ so-”
“Don’t talk about yourself like that. You’re plenty normal.”
“I know I’m normal; it’s just that, my sexuality isn’t viewed that way. I mean, we’re getting there. There’s been a lot more talk and representation than there has been in recent years, but still… There are just people who don’t understand it. And a lot of those people don’t care enough to.”
“OK, so,” Louis started. “You’re asexual. Right?”
“Right.”
“Tell me about it.”
“What?”
“Teach me. What is asexuality?”
Harry grinned. “You’re serious?”
Louis nodded.
“How much time do you have?”
Louis looked down at his wrist like he was checking the time; however, there was no watch there.
“Looks like I’ve got loads of time.”
Harry snorted. “That was terrible.”
“I know. But I like to keep you laughing. Come on. Tell me.”
“OK, um… Well, every ace person is different. Like, some of us like kissing, and some don’t. Some of us are repulsed by sex and others are curious about it. Some of us don’t mind talking about it and others have even had it, or do have it. We’re all different, just like all people are different. So, to ask what asexuality is is a bit of a loaded question.”
“OK, so what makes you asexual? I mean, your lack of interest in sex is kind of a big part, I guess.”
Harry nodded. “Yeah, that’s kind of important.”
“Right. But what else? Like, kissing. Can you kiss?”
“Can I kiss?” Harry laughed.
“You know what I mean! Like, do you want to?”
“I like kissing,” Harry answered. “I do. I’ll kiss you to show my affection, and you can kiss me on my lips and on the cheek. Maybe the forehead, but that’s all. And, you have to realize that it’s not leading anywhere. It’s not going to become a make-out session, and it definitely won’t result in any kind of sex. So, I don’t view kissing as a kind of foreplay, and a lot of people do. You might, but I don’t.”
“OK. So, what about cuddling?”
Harry smiled softly. “I like cuddling. Love it, actually. And I like when people play with my hair.”
“I like to hear that,” Louis said.
“Yeah, I’m kind of a tactile person, but again, it’s not going to lead to anything. I need that to be totally understood.”
Louis nodded before asking, “And, relationships?”
“I want one. But, I need to be able to trust him, completely, and know that I just don’t want to have sex. I’m not playing hard to get, and I won’t change my mind if you ask enough. I’ve been with guys who thought that, and, well… It was disheartening, to say the least.”
Louis listened intently to what Harry was saying.
“So, you can probably understand why I take a lot of caution when it comes to dating.”
Louis nodded. “Totally.”
“I know I just threw a lot at you, but, you asked.”
“You’re right; I did ask. OK, so, to recap…”
Harry laughed. “A recap. OK.”
“No sex at all, of any kind.”
“Right.”
“But kissing and holding hands?” Louis asked. “They’re OK.”
“Absolutely.”
“And late night talks and playing with your hair while we’re cuddled up on the couch watching a movie is OK?”
“Those are good.”
“All right.”
“All right?” Harry wondered.
“What are you doing Friday night?”
“Are you sure? It’s a lot to remember to date me. I’m not like a regular college relationship.”
“I’m sure.”
“OK. Um, I was probably going to start studying for finals, but I didn’t have any solid plans.”
“Do you want to go out, then? With me?”
Harry smiled again. “I’d love to.”
---
“More, more!” Harry called out.
“More?”
Louis adjusted the rope holding Harry up until Harry said, “Too much. Tighter.”
Louis responded by getting rid of the slack in the rope. “How’s that?”
“That’s good.”
Harry looked up in front of him and reached up to grab the next peg, lifting himself up the rock-climbing wall.
Louis had suggested going to the Vertical Rock Gym for their date since he’d gone with some of his brothers during midterms and had absolutely loved it.
Harry had never been rock climbing, which was just another reason to go.
After a short lesson on using the ropes to correctly spot each other, Louis had offered to let Harry go first.
He was impressed to see that Harry was doing really well at it, his upper body strength coming in handy as he gradually scaled the wall.
“You’re almost there!” Louis encouraged.
Harry was already more than halfway up; Louis watched as he stretched his right leg out to the side, and lifted himself a few more inches.
Harry’s back muscles were straining through the back of his T-shirt, and Louis just wanted to run his hands all down them and feel them moving beneath his palms.
And then he shook himself out of that, knowing that wouldn’t be appropriate.
That was going to take some getting used to.
A moment later, Harry reached the top and hit the red buzzer waiting for him.
“Good job, Harry!”
Harry did a quick fist pump before looking down and saying, “All right, get me down from here.”
Louis laughed, but flipped the switch on the rope so he could start loosening it.
He let go of a little bit of the rope at a time, letting Harry descend slowly.
When Harry’s feet were back on the mat, he unclipped his harness and gave himself a pat on the back.
“You did pretty good for your first time up,” Louis complimented.
“Thank you. My hands hurt, though. And so do my shoulders.”
“Yeah, that happens. You probably won’t really feel it until the morning.”
“Oh, goody. OK. You’re up.”
Louis nodded and clipped himself in.
He walked over to the wall and waited for Harry to get set up.
“Ready,” Harry said once everything was secure.
Louis gripped onto the pegs in front of him and stepped up on one that was about a foot off the ground. He lifted himself up and placed his other foot on another peg and kept scaling the wall.
Admittedly, he was showing off a little bit for Harry, as he was moving much faster than Harry had been. He could feel when there was extra slack in his rope; he was moving too quickly for Harry to keep up with adjusting it.
Once he was a little more than halfway up, he looked down to see Harry’s eyes fixated on him. He grinned and continued his way up to the top.
Louis was soon hitting the buzzer at the top of the wall.
Harry cheered for Louis as he started making his way back down to the floor.
“You did so good!” Harry said excitedly once Louis’ two feet were both on the ground.
“Yeah, I did; didn’t I?”
Harry shook his head. “And you’re so humble about it, too.”
“I’m nothing if not honest, babe.”
Harry laughed, and then suggested they move on to the next wall.
They stayed for about a half hour, until Harry started rolling his shoulders a bit too much for Louis’ liking.
“I promise we’ll come back,” Louis told him as they handed in their harnesses.
“I just need to practice. I’ll be able to climb all the walls next time, and not just a few of them.”
“OK, Harry,” Louis said. The two of them got in Louis’ car to drive to the diner down the road to get dinner.
They were seated right away, since the restaurant wasn’t very crowded, and ordered once their waitress came up to the table: a cheeseburger for Harry, and a buffalo chicken panini for Louis.
"You have any plans for winter break?" Louis asked before taking a sip of his water.
"Not really. Just sleeping as much as I can."
"Oh, sleep. That's a foreign concept in my house. The twins will probably come bursting into my room on the first day to wake me up."
"Which ones?" Harry wondered.
Louis laughed. "Both at the same time, probably. But it's cool; I don't mind it. I don't see them all that often."
"Do you ever go home? On like, weekends and stuff?"
"Not really; there's never time. I'm always helping plan a party, or cleaning up after a party, or doing homework."
"At the coffee shop?" Harry asked.
"Sometimes, yeah. Lately, I've been there a few times a week to get my papers typed."
Harry nodded. "Yeah, that's kind of my safe spot, too. Liam thinks I just really like coffee; really, I just hate the arguing couple in the apartment across the hall. We can hear everything."
"It's like that at the frat house, too. Only, instead of a couple arguing, it's two guys chugging beer and twenty others cheering them on."
"So... You know exactly how I feel?" Harry asked sarcastically.
"Sure do."
Harry laughed, which led Louis to smile, too.
Louis found that he really liked Harry's laugh, and wanted to keep hearing it.
He hoped that he didn't screw up this date so that he could.
---
“OK. Here we are,” Louis said as he pulled up outside of Harry’s building. He cut the engine and looked over at Harry, who was slowly taking off his seat belt.
Louis could feel his nerves kicking in as he did the same, more so than they already had.
Usually, he knew what would happen at this part of the night. But this was a new situation for him, and he wasn’t completely confident in what he should do next.
“So, normally, this is the part where I would go for the goodnight kiss,” Louis started. He rubbed at the back of his neck before continuing. “Because, I think the date went really well. Do you? Did- did you have fun?”
Harry nodded. “I had a lot of fun; yeah.”
“Good, because I did, too. So, I really don’t want to mess this up by like, kissing you now if you don’t want me to kiss you.”
“Uh-huh.” Harry smiled at Louis’ nerves taking over. It was so endearing that Harry still couldn’t believe the reputation this boy had floating around campus.
“Yeah, so, like, um…” Louis scratched at his eyebrow, unsure of how to continue.
Harry grinned and rolled his eyes fondly before leaning over and kissing Louis softly on the mouth.
He could hear Louis’ breath hitch as their lips met, but he quickly relaxed into it.
Harry thought that Louis’ lips would be soft, and he was so glad to see that he was correct. Their lips molded smoothly together, and Harry enjoyed every second of it.
He pecked Louis’ lips one, two, three times, each one growing longer than the last, before he pulled away.
Harry pressed his lips together as he opened his eyes, savoring the tingly feeling left behind.
“You’re a really good kisser,” Louis said.
“Thanks.” Harry sat back in his seat before continuing.
“Look, Louis… I really like you, and I realize that this might be the part of the date where the guy invites you up, and maybe that leads to something, but that’s not what’s going to happen here, because, well, that’s something that I’m not comfortable with. I hope that’s OK.”
“Of course that’s OK. Why wouldn’t it be?”
Harry shrugged. “I don’t know. I mean, you like sex, and that’s just not gonna happen with me.”
“You’re right, it’s not. But sex isn’t all I care about, Harry. For example, I care about you. You, Harry, with your beautiful green eyes and love for flowery, half-unbuttoned shirts in early December.”
Harry laughed as Louis continued.
“You, Harry, who, on the surface, may seem a little insecure, but really, you’re completely confident in who you are as a person. You love your family and care a lot about your education and finding total happiness in life. And I want to get to know you more, if you’ll let me.”
Harry bit his lower lip and nodded happily.
“Good,” Louis said.
“Good,” Harry repeated. “Um, I’m gonna go inside now. I’ll see you after break?”
“I hope so.”
Harry smiled before saying good night.
He got out of Louis’ car and went up to his building. He unlocked the main door and walked inside.
Before he shut the door behind him, he turned around, seeing Louis’ car still sitting there.
He waved to Louis, who waved back before backing out of his parking spot.
Harry smiled to himself and closed the door.
He walked up the few flights of steps to his apartment, and walked in.
“How’d it go?” Liam asked from the couch.
“Good,” Harry answered. “Really good.”
“Did he try anything?”
Harry shook his head. “Nope. He was a perfect gentleman.”
“Good. So, the rumors don’t add up?”
“Oh, you mean the ones that say that Louis is a playboy partier who fucks everything that moves? I don’t think so. I definitely didn’t get those vibes from him, at least.”
“Glad to hear it. So when can I meet him? Like, officially? You always manage to have him over here when I’m at class, so…”
“After break? We’re both going to be pretty busy with finals next week, so some time when we get back.”
“This better happen,” Liam warned.
“It will. I promise.”
Liam watched him carefully before saying, “You look happy.”
“Thanks. I am.”
---
“Louis,” Harry moaned. “Oh, Louis…”
Louis captured Harry’s lips in a rough kiss as he thrusted in and out of him.
He picked up his pace, feeling his orgasm coming on.
Soon, he was coming deep inside of Harry, and he let a moan escape his lips.
“Oh, fuck…”
Louis groaned as his eyes shot open.
It was the first week of winter break, and he was back in his bedroom at his mom’s house. He guessed being back in the room made his body act like he was a teenager again.
“Gross,” he whispered as he felt what was in his briefs. He felt sticky everywhere, and a little embarrassed, too.
He was almost 22 and he’d just had a fucking wet dream over a guy that he wasn’t even having sex with, nor would he be.
He sat up in his bed, feeling uncomfortable at the wetness in his underwear.
He stripped them off slowly and threw them on his bed before walking into his bathroom to take a quick shower.
When he got out, he changed into a pair of sweatpants and one of his old frat T-shirts before stripping his bed and taking his sheets and underwear downstairs.
It was probably time for clean bedding, anyway.
He put everything in the washing machine and grabbed a new set of sheets from one of the storage closets in the laundry room.
When he came up, he found his mom looking through the fridge, about to get breakfast started.
“Hey, Boo,” Jay greeted quietly.
“Hey.”
She eyed the sheets in his hand, but thankfully, chose not to comment. “What do you want to eat?” she asked instead.
“What do you feel like making?”
She turned her head and grumpily stared at him over her shoulder.
“OK, OK. Uh, pancakes?”
“Pancakes I can do.”
She started pulling out the ingredients she would need.
Louis sat down at the chair next to the island counter. “Hey, mom,” he started to ask.
“Yeah?”
“Do you think you need to have sex to have a successful relationship?”
Jay stood up straight and turned away from the fridge.
She set down the egg carton in her hand and shut the door behind her. “I feel like we’ll need mimosas for this breakfast.”
Louis grinned. “Nah, no mimosas. Just wondering what you thought.”
“About sex in a relationship? You’re asking me? Your mother?”
“Yeah. I trust your opinion.”
“OK… Well, I think it depends on the people, honestly. When a lot of relationships first start out, sex is a big factor, and it happens a lot. And, as the people get more comfortable together, sex slowly becomes a little less important. That’s when they really focus more on the longevity of the relationship, on whether or not it’s worth pursuing. And eventually, the relationship becomes more date nights and late-night cuddles and, just, enjoying each other’s company. It becomes love and just wanting to be with that person because they’re the most important person to you. So, I guess if you don’t have sex, maybe you just skip the middle steps and focus more on the other person, on whether or not you want to be with them based on their interests and personality, as opposed to the physical wants. If the two people in the relationship want to be together and really love each other, I don’t see why a relationship without sex wouldn’t work.”
Louis had been playing with his fingers the whole time his mother had been speaking.
“Why do you ask, Lou?”
He glanced up at her for a second before returning his gaze to his hands.
“Are you dating someone? Are you dating someone and you didn’t tell me? I’m your mother, Louis! I deserve to know these things.”
“I’m not seeing anybody, Mom. Relax!”
“So what’s going on?”
“I met a guy, Mom. OK? And, I really like him, but he’s asexual. He doesn’t have sex, and he doesn’t want to.”
She leaned against the counter and asked, “Like, he’s celibate?”
“No, like, he has no interest in sex. None. Like, I’m gay, and I have no interest in women because I’m not attracted to them. Well, it’s like that for Harry, but he just doesn’t feel sexual attraction for anybody.”
“Oh,” Jay said simply. “Wow, there’s a label for everything these days, isn’t there?”
“Yeah, and it’s confusing as all hell. I never thought about a relationship without sex until I met Harry. Now, I mean, it seems possible.”
“Do you want the same things?”
Louis nodded. “I think so. I mean, we like the same things when it comes to relationships. Just, I have sex and he doesn’t.”
“Well, like I said, it depends on you two. If you can go without sex for the sake of being with this boy – who I need to hear about when this discussion is over, by the way – then I think you should. What’s your gut telling you to do?”
“I don’t have a gut,” Louis said resentfully.
“You know what I mean.”
“I do.”
“Well, what’s it telling you?”
“It’s telling me… That it’s going to be hard, and it’s going to be different, but I want to try dating Harry.”
“Then I think you should. Sex doesn’t define you, Louis. Don’t forget that.”
“You’re so wise, Mom.”
“I know. Comes with growing up.”
“Oh, is that where it comes from?” Louis jokingly asked. “Guess I’ll never get it, then.”
Jay rolled her eyes fondly and returned to the pancakes. “Shut up, Louis.”
He just laughed in response.
---
The first day back from winter break, Louis called Harry and invited him over to the frat house.
An hour later, they were on Louis’ bed, updating each other on the last few days of their break.
Louis was leaning back against the wall behind him with a pillow in his lap, on which Harry was currently resting his head. Louis was also running his fingers through Harry’s hair as he spoke about meeting his sister’s new boyfriend.
“So Gemma brought him home,” Harry was saying, “and right away, I was like, ‘hang on. I know this guy.’ So I spent most of dinner just staring at him. I wasn’t even listening to him or anything like that. I was just watching him. He probably thought I was the biggest creep.”
Louis chuckled softly at Harry’s description of himself.
“Finally, toward the end of the night, I realize that I had the guy as a substitute teacher in high school. He was one that I pranked on his first day.”
“You pranked somebody?”
“I did. I got him good, too.”
“What did you do?” Louis asked.
“OK, so we knew we were gonna have the sub for like, two weeks, because my teacher had a death in the family, and she had to go home for the funeral and to see everybody, but she’s from Italy, so she had to fly out there and she wasn’t just gonna stay for like, a day; you know what I mean?”
“Right.”
“So, on the first day, I drew a picture of a cat. The problem was, the body looked like a cock, and I drew that part with Sharpie. And I drew the rest of it – ears, tail, face – with dry erase marker. When he walked in, he was like, ‘Oh, thank you for the drawing. Whoever did it did a nice job.’ And then he tried to erase it.”
Louis understood what was coming next. “Oh, no.”
“Yeah. He erased the cat part of it, and was just left with a big, fat penis on the white board. He had to call maintenance to try to get it off, and that didn’t happen until the next day. He was so mad.”
“That’s pretty funny,” Louis said through his laughter. “Did you get in trouble?”
Harry shook his head. “Nah. Nobody knew I did it. Anyway, back to meeting the guy… I asked him if he liked cats, which is a fair question because Gemma has a cat. And he said that he didn’t mind them, but they weren’t his favorite.”
“And how did that go over?”
“Well, Gemma, of course, wanted to know why, and he told the story. The whole time he’s talking, I’m smiling at him. I tried to hide it, but I’m sure I didn’t. At the end of his story, while my mom’s talking about the bratty kid who drew the cat on the board, he’s looking at me, and you could see the realization on his face. He didn’t talk to me for the rest of the night.”
“Over a little prank from like, four years ago? Nerd.”
“I know, right!” Harry giggled. “I don’t know. I told Gemma later that I was the one who drew the cat, and she busted out laughing. Said it was the funniest thing she’d ever heard.”
“I like your sister,” Louis told him.
“Thanks. She’d like you, too, I think.”
“Yeah? Well that’s cool.”
“Yeah…” Harry cleared his throat.
“What?”
“Well, since we’re talking about my family…” Harry started quietly.
“Yeah?”
“Well, they’re coming down next weekend to see me.”
“So soon? What’s the occasion?”
“Um, it’s for my birthday.”
“When’s your birthday?” Louis asked.
“Next Thursday.”
“Your birthday is next Thursday? Why didn’t you tell me?”
Harry shrugged. “It’s not really a big deal. We don’t have to do anything if you’re busy or something.”
“Of course I’m not busy. We’ll do something next Thursday. You don’t turn 22 every day.”
“Says you. You turned 22 over the break and I didn’t do anything for you.”
“You calling me and singing ‘Happy Birthday’ over the phone was present enough.”
“OK,” Harry smiled.
“I feel like there was more to the conversation than that.”
“Yeah, there kind of was. Um… If you want, you can come over when my family’s here. And, you know, meet them?”
Louis paused. “You- You want me to meet your family?”
“If you want!” Harry rushed. “You don’t have to. I mean, we’re not doing anything special. We’ll probably just order pizza and watch a movie or something. It’s not a big deal.”
“No, I’d love to. Families love me.”
“Oh, now who’s full of himself?”
Louis laughed. “Seriously. What day?”
“Next Friday.”
“Next Friday it is.”
“OK.” Harry couldn’t keep the grin off his face.
Louis ducked his head down and pressed a soft kiss to Harry’s lips.
He pulled back after a few seconds, careful to not make Harry uncomfortable.
He could tell Harry noticed that, as he was still smiling when Louis sat up again.
“So how was your break?” Harry asked.
“Well…”
Niall burst through the door then, letting it slam shut behind him.
He let out a low groan before flopping down on his bed.
“You OK, Ni?” Louis asked.
“No,” he grunted in response before flipping over to lie on his back. “I hate people. I hate people who are so narrow-minded that they can’t understand that people are different, and just because I’m one thing doesn’t mean I’m another."
Louis and Harry watched Niall carefully, not sure if he was going to continue.
After a moment of silence, they figured that he wasn’t.
“What happened, Niall?” Harry asked cautiously.
“Nothing.”
“Niall…”
Niall let out a deep breath before answering. “OK, so, right before I left to come up here, I was hanging at my friend Sean’s house. There were a couple of us there, and my other friend Dave said something like, ‘Oh, you’re so lucky that you can sleep with whoever you want and not get attached.’”
Louis and Harry stared at Niall in shock, confused at how someone could be that insensitive.
“Like, I’m not lucky,” Niall continued. “It’s just who I am. It’s not like I shut off my emotions just for the hell of it, and I don’t suppress my real feelings; I just don’t feel that way about anyone. I don’t want to get married one day to the ‘love of my life,’ I don’t want long walks on the beach or glasses of wine in front of the fire place and I still don’t understand the necessity of Valentine’s Day. So, because I don’t feel that way about anybody, but I still have sex every now and then, I’m the lucky one. I’m the player. I’m the manwhore. And apparently, that’s a good thing.”
“Niall, stop blaming yourself,” Harry said. “I see what you’re doing. You’re putting it all on yourself and making it seem like you’re the problem, when you’re not. The people we have to deal with every day are the ones with the problem.”
Louis stared down at Harry in admiration, while Niall’s glance over at him was nothing less than hopeful.
“Niall, you’re as much of a manwhore as I am a prude,” Harry said as he sat up. “Just because you can’t write sonnets about the beauty of someone’s eyes doesn’t mean you’re dysfunctional. You are who you are, and you shouldn’t be ashamed of that.”
“Do you ever feel like…” Niall started a moment later. “Like, everyone around you gets to be who they are and who they want to be, and you’re just chugging along, putting on a mask and letting everyone else think they know the real you? Because you’re just too tired to explain to them who you actually are?”
Harry nodded his head. “Of course I do; all the time. I mean…” He stole a quick glance at Louis before continuing, “A lot less so these days, but I definitely do.”
“I just wish people would understand that I didn’t ask to be this way. But it’s who I am, and I’m not changing it for anybody.”
“I want the same thing. Like, just because I don’t want to have sex doesn’t make me weird. It doesn’t mean I’m a freak or any less of a man. And I’m definitely not a prude. I just don’t want it. And you know what? If you explain it to people, and they still make no effort to understand or appreciate that part of you, then those aren’t the people you really want in your life anyway.”
Once Harry was done speaking, and Niall had a chance to absorb the information, he got off his own bed and climbed into Louis’.
“Thanks, Harry,” Niall said as he snuggled into Harry’s other side.
“You’re welcome.”
Louis smiled at his best friend and, well, he wasn’t sure what Harry was, exactly. But he was glad that he and Niall were such good friends already.
Harry looked up at Louis, like he wasn’t sure if Louis was OK with Harry and Niall’s cuddling.
But Louis just quickly kissed Harry on top of his head, wrapped his arm around Harry and got comfortable right where he was.
---
“I like Harry,” Niall told Louis later that night as the two of them got ready for bed.
“Me, too.”
“Good. Keep him around, OK?”
“I plan on it,” Louis assured him. “Don’t worry.”
Niall smiled before saying, “Oh, and we need to start prepping for the party next weekend. You know it’s going to be huge.”
“Shit, yeah,” Louis said.
Every year, the frat would throw a huge party two weeks before Valentine’s Day, and a lot of the single members of the fraternities and sororities used it as a mixer to find a date for the actual holiday.
It was usually the frat’s biggest party of the year, and everyone found someone to hook up with by the end of the night, whether or not they were single when they first arrived.
“Yeah. I forgot all about that.”
“You forgot? Tommo, you look forward to this party every year. You feeling all right?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” Louis insisted. “It just slipped my mind, is all. It’s on Friday, right?”
“Yup. You bringing Harry?”
“Probably. Not like he wouldn’t come on his own, anyway.”
Niall laughed. “That’s true. Dude loves a good party.”
It didn’t hit Louis until he was lying in bed twenty minutes later. The party was next Friday, the same day he was supposed to meet Harry’s family.
“Fuck,” he whispered to himself. He was required to be at the party. It was one of the frat’s main social events. There was no way he would be allowed to skip it.
How was he going to get his way out of this one?
---
On Wednesday morning, both Louis and Harry had some free time before their classes began for the day. So, they walked to their coffee shop for a quick breakfast date.
As they headed back, Louis decided to break the news about next Friday night.
“Hey, so, will your family be here for more than just Friday night?”
“Yeah, I think they’re staying the night, so they’ll be here for part of Saturday before going back. I know Gemma definitely has work on Sunday, so she’ll need to be back for that. Why?”
“Oh, just wondering,” Louis said.
“OK. Did you want to hang out with us on Saturday, too?”
“Well, not too. More like, instead.”
Harry stopped walking where he was. “Huh?”
Louis sighed before telling Harry, “I can’t come over on Friday night. The frat’s having the annual pre-Valentine’s Day party, and I can’t miss it.”
“Oh.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t be sorry,” Harry insisted. “It’s OK. Just, don’t be too hungover on Saturday. That would be a pretty bad first impression.”
“Yeah… Are you mad?”
“No, I’m not mad. You have responsibilities; you should keep them. And you can just come over on Saturday. That might be better, anyway. We’ll have more time, probably.”
“I’m still sorry. I told you I would be there, and now I’m not.”
Harry smiled at Louis’ disappointment in himself before leaning in and kissing him on the cheek. “Stop beating yourself up about it. It’s really not a big deal.”
“OK.”
“It’s just a bummer,” Harry teased as he began walking again.
“What is?”
“Well, you won’t be there on Friday, so… You’re not gonna get any cake. And my mom makes a mean red velvet.”
“No!” Louis whined. “Not red velvet!”
“Yup,” Harry shrugged. “Red velvet. And I’m not saving you any.”
“So not fair. Stupid frat.”
“Yeah,” Harry agreed. He trailed his hand down Louis’ arm, and took Louis’ hand in his own, weaving their fingers together. “Stupid frat.”
Louis looked down at their joined hands and back up to Harry.
Harry smiled one more time and they kept walking.
“You really won’t save me any cake, though?” Louis asked, a small pout on his face.
“OK. Maybe one little piece.”
---
Louis stood in front of the stove in Harry’s kitchen the following Thursday, checking over the recipe one more time.
“Are you sure you don’t want any help?” Harry asked from where he was sitting on the counter.
“Yeah, I’m sure.” Louis put the book down and grabbed a knife and fork.
He had two chicken breasts simmering in one of the pans in front of him, alfredo sauce thickening in a second, pasta cooking in a third and broccoli boiling in a fourth.
For the first time in his life, he was using the entire stove, instead of just one burner to make ramen. He felt like a proper chef.
He took his fork, speared one of the chicken breasts and sliced it in half.
“No pink,” he said quietly. He checked the second one and saw that both were ready to come out of the pan.
He turned off the front burner and moved the chicken to a plate to be cut up.
He saw that the broccoli had been boiling for about five minutes already, so he turned that burner off, as well.
Louis started cutting up the chicken into bite-size pieces, and by the time he was done, the pasta was done, too.
Putting on an expert face, he drained the water out of the broccoli and pasta pots, and set them back down before mixing the chicken and vegetables into the pan with the sauce.
He stirred everything together and let it cook for a few more minutes before turning off all of the burners.
“OK,” Louis announced. “Plates, please?”
Harry nodded and jumped down from the counter. He went into one of the cabinets and pulled out two plates.
“Here you are, chef.”
“Thank you.”
Louis poured a generous portion of pasta on top of each plate and covered it with the sauce, broccoli and chicken.
They each took a plate and walked out to the table, which Harry had already set.
“I’m gonna get some wine. Do you want some?” Harry asked.
“Sounds good,” Louis replied as he sat down. “Thank you.”
Harry went back into the kitchen and returned with two glasses of white wine.
He set one down in front of Louis and sat down with his own.
“This looks good,” Harry praised as he got comfortable.
“I hope so.”
Louis raised his wine glass in the air. “Happy birthday, Harry.”
“Thank you.” Harry picked up his glass, as well, and the two of them drank in a toast.
“OK; the moment of truth,” Louis said as he picked up his fork.
They both took a bite at the same time. Louis liked it, but he watched Harry’s face to see if he did, as well.
As Harry finished chewing his food, he looked up to Louis and smiled. “It’s really good, Lou.”
“Yes!” Louis cheered, throwing a fist up in the air. “Success!”
Harry laughed at Louis’ reaction. “Do you really not cook?”
“No. Not at all. My brothers are the same way. We order out a lot at the house.”
“I’ve noticed. I can almost always find some pepperoni pizza or chicken lo mein in someone’s fridge.”
“Yeah, we don’t mess around. That’s why we usually don’t have money.”
“And yet, you manage to have kegs at every party you host.”
“That’s different.”
“How?” Harry giggled.
“Because beer money and food money are two totally different things. Duh.”
“Frat boy logic.” Harry shook his head. “I can’t keep up.”
They ate their dinner quickly, with both of them getting a second glass of wine.
When they finished, Harry cleared their plates away, and Louis brought in the glasses and threw out their napkins.
“You ready for your present now?” Louis asked.
“You really didn’t have to get me anything.”
“I know. It’s really not a big deal. But, I went to the store, and I saw it and thought you might like it.”
“So, you went shopping to find something for my birthday?” Harry grinned. “Yeah, not a big deal at all.”
“OK, so maybe I wanted to buy you something. Whatever. Come on.”
Louis took his hand and pulled him out to the living room.
“If you don’t like it, I can always take it back,” Louis said as Harry sat down on the couch.
“I’m gonna love it; shut up.”
Louis walked over to the closet by the front door and grabbed the gift bag he’d placed there when he’d arrived.
“Happy birthday,” Louis sang as he handed Harry the bag.
Harry took it excitedly and pulled out the card first.
It had a kitten on the front, and said ‘Happy Birthday!’ at the bottom.
Harry opened it to read, “Hope your special day is purr-fect!”
He saw that Louis had signed his name, along with a big smiley face.
Harry smiled and said, “Thank you; it was.”
“Glad to hear that.”
Harry put the card on the table and pushed aside the tissue paper inside, and pulled out a warm-looking lilac-colored sweater.
Harry gasped as he took in the color and felt the soft material. “Louis, I love it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah!”
Harry stood up and held it against his torso. “It’s the right size and everything.”
“I may have checked some of your other sweaters when I was here the other day,” Louis admitted quietly.
“I love it.” Harry beamed as he sat back down next to Louis and pecked him on the lips. “You’re the best.”
“I know, right?”
Harry rolled his eyes and put the sweater back in the bag. “Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Sure. What should we watch?”
“Don’t laugh?”
“Why would I laugh?”
“Because I want to watch Love, Actually, and I want to watch it now because I know Gemma won't let me watch it when she comes up this weekend.”
Louis was confused. “Why wouldn’t she let you watch it?”
“Because I made her watch it all the time when we were kids and now she hates the movie. But I love watching it on my birthday, so…”
“So let’s watch it,” Louis decided. “I love that movie, too.”
“Really?” Harry asked, his face lighting up.
“Of course, babe. It’s your birthday. You should get to watch the movie you want.”
Without another word, Harry got up to set up the DVD.
As he did that, Louis felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He slipped it out to check the new message he had.
Niall: Yo man, thirsty Thursday at the pub. Where are you?????
Louis stared at the message briefly before putting it back in his pocket.
“Everything OK?” Harry asked. He tilted his head toward Louis’ phone as he sat back down.
“Yup. Perfect.”
He leaned over and kissed Harry softly on the lips.
Harry pulled back a few seconds later, now wearing a smile on his face.
He kicked his feet up onto the coffee table and shifted so he was closer to Louis.
After Louis hit the ‘Play’ button, he asked Harry, “Did you have a good birthday?”
“Of course, I did. Dinner and a movie in the comforts of my own home?” Harry sighed before saying, “What else could I ask for?”
Louis placed a kiss on the top of Harry’s head, knowing that he was thinking the same thing.
---
The party was crazy on Friday night.
The music playing from the speakers was loud enough to be heard all over campus, and the thumping of the bass could probably be felt by everyone, too.
Almost the entire Greek community was packed inside of the Sigma house, and, after about an hour, spread to the backyard, despite the freezing February temperatures.
Two of the kegs had already been drained dry, and Louis could see his brothers tapping two new ones.
There was a girl currently lying on the kitchen counter while one of the guys from Tau sucked tequila out of her belly button.
Niall had just won his third game of beer pong, and was taking shots in celebration.
The party was a total success, and it was clear that everybody was having a great time.
Except for Louis, who was currently standing in the corner, checking his phone.
Harry had just sent him a picture of the red velvet birthday cake his mom had baked. Louis smiled at the next message that Harry sent him.
Harry: Mom thought it would be funny to put ‘Feeling 22’ on the cake. Like I really needed a Taylor Swift reference.
Louis: Hahaha. She loves you. Gemma probably didn’t discourage it, either.
Harry: Why do your texts still make sense? Shouldn’t you be beating your keg stand record right now?
Louis: New kegs just got tapped, so of course, there’s a huge crowd around each one for refills. Maybe later.
Harry: OK. Get to 39 seconds tonight!
Louis: We’ll see.
Louis: Miss you.
Harry: Aww. =)
Harry: You’re cute. I miss you, too, but go have fun!
Louis thought it might be too cheesy to say that he was having plenty of fun talking to Harry, so instead, he just sent a simple ‘k’ in response.
“Lou!” Niall yelled as he approached him. “What are you doing over here?”
Louis shrugged. “Not really feeling it tonight.”
“How come?”
Niall took a step back and looked around the room. “Where’s Harry?”
“Not here. He’s with his family tonight.”
“Oh, that’s why you look all lost. Your boyfriend’s not here.”
“He’s not my boyfriend.”
Niall scoffed. “Yeah, OK. Did he ask you to come meet his family tonight?”
“Yeah.”
“So you’re his boyfriend. Pay attention. But let me ask this: if he’s there, why aren’t you?”
“Huh?”
“If you were asked to meet Harry’s family – which is a big step, by the way – why are you here?”
Louis held his hands out to his sides, gesturing toward the party. “Because of this?”
“This? The party? You picked the party over meeting Harry’s parents? Are you kidding?”
“No?”
“Get out of here!” Niall shouted over the music. “Go on. You clearly don’t want to be here, anyway.”
“Are you kidding? Chris will kill me if I bail.”
He was referring to the fraternity’s president, who was very strict about full fraternity attendance, especially at huge events like tonight.
“Chris is wasted,” Niall said. “And he’s outside, where he’ll probably fall asleep and catch hypothermia.”
“Don’t let him catch hypothermia.”
“I won’t, but I will cover for you if he asks. Now get out of here. Go get your man.”
Louis didn’t bother to correct him this time. Instead, he just said, “Thanks, Ni. I’ll see you later.”
“You better not.”
Louis grinned and ran upstairs to their room. He took off the plain shirt he was wearing, and instead, pulled on a gray sweater. Luckily, his hair was already done, and he could probably get away with wearing the black jeans and black Vans he already had on.
He grabbed his keys and wallet and stuffed them into his pocket before slipping on his coat.
Then he, very carefully, hurried out the door, hoping nobody saw him ditching his own frat’s party.
Louis jumped in his car and drove over to Harry’s building.
Once he parked, he went up to the main door and hit the buzzer for Harry and Liam’s apartment.
He waited a minute before Harry’s gravelly voice came over the speakers.
“Hello?”
“Harry, it’s me!”
“Louis? What are you doing here? I thought you had your party.”
“I do. I did. But I wanted to be here instead.”
Louis stood in silence for a moment, waiting for Harry to say something.
“Really?”
“Yeah, Harry. The party was boring as hell without you there. It all seems so dumb without you there with me. I would much rather be here with you than over at the house right now. I hope I’m not too late.”
“Of course you’re not! Come on up.”
Louis heard the buzzer and he walked inside. He hurried up the stairs and knocked on the door when he got there.
Harry opened it only seconds later, but stepped out into the hallway, pulling it nearly closed behind him.
“Hi,” Harry greeted.
“Hi.”
Harry wrapped his arms around Louis’ waist, pulling him into a hug.
“I really did miss you,” Louis whispered into the crook of Harry’s neck.
“I know,” Harry whispered back. “I missed you, too.”
He took a step back before saying, “Plus, I made the mistake of mentioning you to them and now Gemma won’t stop asking where you are.”
Louis laughed. “Well, let’s not keep her waiting, then. Shall we?”
Harry nodded and took Louis’ hand in his own. He pushed the door back open and led Louis inside of the apartment.
Louis saw three people he’d only seen pictures of so far.
“Guys, this is Louis,” Harry introduced. “Louis, that’s my mom, Anne; my sister, Gemma; and my stepdad, Robin.”
Louis waved at them, noticing the inspecting looks in all of their eyes.
Robin was the first to say anything. He stood up and reached a hand out to shake Louis’ free one. “Nice to meet you, Louis,” Robin said. “We were really looking forward to meeting Harry’s boyfriend tonight.”
“Oh, he’s-” Harry started to say. He stopped when he felt Louis tightly squeeze his hand.
The two of them made eye contact, and Louis raised his eyebrows hopefully, figuratively crossing his fingers that Harry understood what he was trying to say.
It seemed like he did, because his face lit up almost immediately.
“It’s nice to meet you, too,” Louis told Robin.
After seeing Robin give Louis a warm welcome, Anne and Gemma walked over, as well.
“Hi, Louis,” Anne said.
Louis couldn’t help but notice how much Harry resembled her.
“Hi, Anne. Thank you for having me. I didn’t want to intrude on your family time.”
“Of course. If you’re Harry’s boyfriend, then you’re always welcome. Besides, I need to make sure you’re good enough for my boy.”
“Mom!” Harry hissed.
“It’s OK,” Louis laughed. “My mom will probably want to do the same thing.”
Then it was Gemma’s turn.
Louis almost lost his breath when Gemma crashed into him, giving him a tight hug.
“You hurt my brother and I hurt you,” she whispered into his ear.
His posture went stiff at the threat, one that he took very seriously. As she stepped back, she lightly pinched his side, causing Louis to yelp in surprise.
Harry must’ve missed it, because he looked at Louis in confusion.
“All good,” Louis assured.
“OK… Oh! I saved you some cake; come on.”
As Harry and Louis walked into the kitchen, Gemma called out, “We’re gonna pick a movie, H.”
“OK!”
“Do we have to watch Love, Actually? Please say ‘no.’”
Harry glanced at Louis and raised an eyebrow, as if to say, ‘See? I told you.’
Louis laughed as Harry said, “No, we don’t have to watch it. You can pick something else!”
“Thank you!”
Harry pulled a knife out of the silverware drawer and went to the cake pan that he still had sitting out on the counter.
He sliced a piece for Louis and slid it onto a plate. He grabbed a fork out of the silverware drawer and speared it into the cake.
When he turned around, he found Louis smiling fondly at him.
“What?”
“Nothing,” Louis shrugged. “Just glad I’m here.”
“I think you said that already.”
“Well, I mean it.”
“In that case, I’m glad you’re here, too. It would’ve been annoying if I had saved cake for nothing.”
Louis laughed as he took the plate Harry offered him.
“So about the whole ‘boyfriend’ thing…” Harry started.
“I’m sorry,” Louis blurted out. “It’s just, Niall called you my boyfriend when I said I was bored at the party, and at first, I corrected him, but then I thought about it, and you kind of are like my boyfriend. I mean, we talked every day over break and hung out all the time before that. And we still talk every single day. And I haven’t been seeing anybody else, and I don’t know if you are, or were, but I really hope you’re not, because that would suck if you were seeing other guys. Although you could; I mean, we never had the talk about being exclusive, so it’s not like I could be mad if you were.”
“Louis.” Harry interrupted him, clapping a hand over his mouth. “Slow down. Relax. It’s OK. I feel exactly the same way.”
He lowered his hand to let Louis talk again.
“Yeah?” Louis asked.
“Yeah.”
“Cool.”
Louis leaned over and kissed Harry on the lips.
“We’re gonna start the movie without you!” Gemma called from the living room.
The two of them stepped back and smiled at each other.
“Shall we?”
Harry extended a hand, which Louis took easily.
The two of them walked out of the kitchen and plopped themselves down on the couch next to each other.
“Ready?” Gemma asked.
“So ready,” Harry answered.
As Harry layered a blanket on top of them and snuggled into his side, and Louis thought about their new relationship and their future yet to come, he couldn’t help but realize how true that statement was.