Chapter Text
They haven’t really discussed what the late-night cuddling on Yuuta’s bed meant before he left for Africa.
It was an unspoken agreement that both liked something about that situation, about each other. They just never had time to get into the semantics of whether their little ritual had changed from its previous, admittedly purely pragmatic, intent of helping Yuuta sleep after his traumatic, sudden goodbye to Rika to something else.
Even if he tiptoed around his feelings in their nearly daily, way too obviously flirty texts during his time away, Toge knew (at least for his side of the story) that the first thing he’d do when Yuuta came back was to throw himself on the lanky, awkward teen and confess on the spot.
He wants Yuuta back so badly that he doesn’t care about the confused looks on the first years as he storms off to greet his crush best friend on that day in October when the familiar black car with Ichiji in the driver’s seat rolls onto the Jujutsu Tech campus. Toge tries his hardest not to trip over the sets of stairs cascading downward as the valley of the parking space draws nearer and nearer before his glimmering lavender eyes.
Admittedly, the excitement dies down pretty quickly, though, as soon as Gojo exits the car first. Toge stops in his tracks, slouching visibly. He almost expects this to be one of those times when their teacher steamrolls their arranged plans and promises and utters a cheery “Oh, Yuuta-kun? It’s funny you ask because he was actually requested for another mission before he comes home but look—I got all my favorite students some souvenirs!” and, while at it, he would have the nerve to tease Toge about his near desperate excitement to see his “friend” as Gojo came to underline this word for everyone to be seen with a devilish smirk recently. Gojo's told them once of his best “friend” during a super important lesson on special grade sorcerers and everyone had at least some modicum of respect not to question the homoromantic tension within that story.
Traitor, Toge scowls.
So yes, Gojo's own flavor of harassment seems entirely possible to happen today and Toge dreads this possibility since he can’t possibly hype himself up another time to do the whole ‘today you’ll confess’ pep-talk in front of his bathroom mirror all over again. People have started to ask...questions. Maki doesn't even hide her sharp tongue in front of him and even has the audacity to ask how things are going with "loverboy." And Yuuji may be a little slow at times, but even he inquired about the meaning of Toge’s week-long repeated mumbling of “tsuna. shake, tuna mayo. Yuuta, umeboshi!” behind closed doors.
What a drag, the whole lot of them.
“Wow! Look at who missed his favorite teacher!” Gojo cackles behind his stupid sunglasses. Toge makes sure to roll his eyes in a way that would pierce all of his six eyes and maybe his inflated ego at the same time if he was lucky.
“Aww, no need to be so hurtful, Toge-kuuun,” he pouts theatrically as he wiggles a large bag of what are probably sweet souvenirs between his fingers. “Look how many souvenirs I got my favorite students,” Gojo lilts, now with a smile on his face. Bingo.
Gojo puts the bag on the hood of the car and his smile turns mischievous as he says, “Oh, and I got a little something, hmm… I should say ‘someone’ special just for Toge-kun here as well,” announcing it with a clenched fist near his face as if he’s speaking into a microphone. The other hand, he stretches out like some gameshow host announcing the unveiling of the most anticipated prize that Toge hopes to be lucky winner of. Or, in this case, the person who clicks the other car door open. Toge’s eyes sparkle and he inhales sharply under his uniform’s scarf from the presentiment of something good that'll happen any minute now.
Sure enough, only a few moments later, the door gently swings open, and out comes a tall and handsome man shouldering a katana bag.
“May I present,” Gojo fakes a drumroll and pulls out all the stops to give him a grand entrance and Toge watches the poor man's theatrical production, very little impressed. (Toge has always wondered whether Red could be adapted into a harmless ‘fireworks mode’ or something like a laser show. Now that would be impressive, he thought.) “Here’s our one and only, most beloved cursed child and special grade sorcerer, Okkotsuuu Yuuta-kunnnn!” Gojo celebrates with jazz hands and some pitchy whoop whoops for good measure. Ichiji claps in social obligation, it seems.
Now it's Toge’s turn to react and he's absolutely hypnotized by the man who stands by the car. Perhaps he is already affected by a cursed technique of that nature without having noticed. How else was he to believe that the person before him was his same once awkward, timid crush best friend, Yuuta.
No, retract that. Not the same. Absolutely not the same.
And that person smiles at him as soon as he sees Toge up ahead on the stairs and waves with a playful smirk. Yeah, no, definitely not Yuuta.
Yet, Toge froze in his steps at the striking familiarity of who was just introduced to him as the one and only, Yuuta. His head tries to make sense of it, but the visual image his mind retained of the slightly timid, slouched over, baby-faced Yuuta is clashing starkly with this… this tall, hot caramel macchiato (with extra whipped Toge) who comes in hot and sizzling as he runs up the stairs towards him, holding the strap of his bag over the right shoulder.
Oh no, Toge was absolutely not prepared to confess to this version of Yuuta. He's had his sugary sweet caffeine kick in the morning to get the day started right but he would've waited if somebody told him he'd be overdosing on the intoxicating look Yuuta casts upon him that affects him like an espresso shot right through his veins.
Where was that bi-monthly newsletter that informed him in advance of all of the drastic changes that he was desperately trying to wrap his head around within mere seconds? Impossible! Even with his hardware working at 2x speed to adapt to this confident version of Yuuta, his brain does not compute.
Why the fuck didn’t anyone send him the memo?!
“Toge!” Yuuta exclaims with a dazzling smile that warms Toge’s frozen state like the scorching heat of the sun. His voice is still the same, but he just can’t seem to get over the incongruence between his mental image of Yuuta and the mind-bending visual of the Yuuta right in front of him.
Meanwhile, Maki, Panda, and the first years have caught up a few steps behind Toge – Yuuji and Nobara to see the famous special grade student, and the others to greet their old friend. He hears Maki and Panda snickering as they have already done these past few days, while Yuuji is probably getting a high-speed introduction from Megumi judging by the ‘huh’ and ‘uh-huh’ that he hears behind him. He's trying to compute as well, good for him. Toge swears he also hears someone’s teeth crunching and this time it’s not their resident panda.
Without breaking eye contact, Yuuta quickly skips over the steps – too few, too small, too fast – with ease and effortlessly scoops up Toge in a hug that literally lifts him off the ground.
“I’m back. I missed everyone,” his smooth voice travels directly into his ear due to the sheer closeness of their bodies entangled like this.
“I missed you too, Toge,” he speaks in a husky whisper with a tinge of expectancy in his tone.
Caught off guard by this sudden attack, Toge abandons all hopes of going through with his confession on the spot as just the warm breath from Yuuta’s affectionately charged words tickling his ears has his hairs stick up at the back of his nape and he’s sure that by now his face has become as crimson as a strawberry.
At least he’s not currently facing his friends or Yuuta himself. But, oh god, Gojo. Gojo is at it again with a mad storm of lightning flashing from his smartphone documenting the whole scene. He’ll never live that down if the footage makes it to anyone other than Gojo. He feels entirely put on the spot in this whole situation.
He feels small and short, and so very flustered within Yuuta’s tight embrace, his arms and feet hanging uselessly over the ground.
“O-Okaka...!” he stammers in his bewilderment.
Wrong. It was all so very wrong!
His eyes dilate and his face darkens a deeper shade of red in embarrassment as he takes in every single aspect of their long-awaited reunion. How is it that within less than a year Yuuta has changed so, so much?
Of course, he’d come back being all handsome like that. There was just no other way if those relations to Gojo were prophetic in any other way than the strength of Yuuta’s cursed technique. Not that he didn’t fancy him from the start; Toge had already been blessed with images of the nervous, but insanely endearing boy before he even knew what to call this feeling of adoration. Back then, his tousled black hair had just the right amount of spikiness and fluff and his big, stormy blue eyes shone with a spark of innocence despite the dark shadows underneath that spoke of his waking nightmares as a boy made special grade sorcerer within just one fateful day. Toge’s mind was flooded with the shy smiles and cute faces of confusion Yuuta sometimes made while he adjusted to the way things worked in Jujutsu society.
Yes, Yuuta has always caught Toge’s attention with his personality and physical appearance, so he couldn’t help but hyperfocus and compare the Yuuta he's been texting with these past few months and the changes he has noticed in his personality and the way he looked in his sporadic (blurry) selfies. In Toge's defense, those photos absolutely do no justice to Yuuta's stunning effect on Toge in real life. He is just the image of confidence incarnate, but not the braggy kind like Gojo, thank goodness. No, it is genuine and humble on Yuuta. After all, Yuuta's spoken three full sentences without stammering or his voice cracking, and that is saying a lot! Not to mention his new and mature look. His face has become more defined, sharper edges more prominent, no longer adorned with padded cheeks of child-like roundness. The dark shadows might have turned darker, but the tan he's acquired over there together with those permanent(?) marks unironically looks healthier than with his pale complexion a few months ago. The inky hair that was somewhat funny on that one picture where it sloppily framed his face in a lousy attempt to deal with the growing locks is now parted elegantly to the side and Toge can't help but feel a sense of comradeship for the grown-out hair that just looks so mature on Yuuta. (He's been told it has the opposite effect on his own face.) His posture is straight now and it does wonders for his confident first impression on the first years who look at him with a sense of reverence (minus Nobara - she looks furious). He’s also grown more into his same old white uniform, filling out the once baggy fabric with strong arms and most likely a deliciously muscled rest of the body to go with them if the arms that squeeze him tight and the broad back he holds onto now like a lifeline are anything go by.
Unable to resist this affectionate display of all the words left unsaid, Toge gives into the love he feels for this boy and relaxes in Yuuta’s arms like the pining fool he is. It doesn't have to mean anything, he tells himself. Maybe it's just the kind of friendship they've cultivated where two guys can be bromantic and sleep in the same bed without catching feelings. For a brief moment, however, Toge wishes nothing more than to skip the part where they discuss the extent of their unspoken feelings and crash into his bed with fervent, burning hot kisses and touch every – preferably naked– centimeter of Yuuta’s newly sculpted body. Oh lord, send a prayer for this boy and return him from the heavens to the grounding earth. He is on cloud nine already and not prepared to come down anytime soon.
Not that he could, literally. Not unless Yuuta releases him from this dreamlike hug and plants him back on the ground where he’d be rooted like a sunflower, his gaze following wherever his sun is in silent appreciation.
“Su-Sujiko…tsuna, mentaiko, Yuuta,” he scolds him, asking to be put back on his feet.
“Heh, yeah,” Yuuta speaks with a knowing smile, “you’re right. I’ll say hi to the others now, okay?” He winks at Toge as he heads up the stairs.
Only then could Toge truly appreciate, or should he say lament their obvious height difference as Yuuta moves past Toge onto the same step as his for just a second. He's boiling with conflicting stimuli of jealousy and attraction. Just how is he to topple this boy and confess his undying love to him without actually being able to make him budge thanks to the unexpected boost in size and strength? Just what in the world went down all this time Yuuta spent in Africa?!
Logically, he knows that Yuuta was sent there to reclaim his special grade status and get out of the hairs of the Higher Ups for the time being. Of course, he'd outgrow his timid character and his skinny body. However, you can’t tell a guy that his best friend goes overseas to train with hardly any word about his impressive personal journey and expect him to welcome back said friend being all hot and sexy with confidence entirely unfazed!
While Yuuta had completed all kinds of journeys over there— air travel, those relating to his strength and his technique, and god forbid, did Yuuta have any romantic conquests while over there?—Toge’s inability to adapt to all of these questions and divine challenges presented before him express themselves on a face journey that Gojo, to Toge's absolute dismay, documents with so much dedication.
Right then and there he feels exhaustion overcoming him as he utters a dejected “tsuna mayo” as if he's used his technique on the special grade only to backfire on an astronomical scale. And in a way, it has. Backfired, that is. He's been so confident in the success of his plan, to fluster the shy Yuuta and make him blush furiously, that he completely forgot to calculate the variable where Yuuta's the one who faces him head-on with his own confidence within and out.
Toge admits defeat and trudges towards the rest of the group who welcome Yuuta each in their own way—though someone really should hold back Nobara’s flying fists before it gets ugly. (He doesn't have the heart to tell her that her threats would be futile against Yuuta in a real fight.)
So he doesn’t say it today.
After all this time, they're together again and Toge thought that they remained the same. But so many things have changed with Yuuta's return back home that he can't help his mind from wondering what else has or possibly could change between them.
If anything, and he doesn't admit that easily because he's still being petty about their physical differences (read: height), he likes to think that his own feelings have just become even more intense than he could've ever imagined. He would devote his everything to Yuuta.
So, maybe he'll try again tomorrow after all.