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ill never let go of your hand

Summary:

“Don’t kill me please,” he says, stepping back as the leopard gets closer. Before Sungho can fully shift and disappear into the grass, the leopard collapses at his feet.

“Oh.”

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Sungho is out on patrol. He only patrols during the daytime, right at the crack of dawn, because it’s the only time it’s safe for him to go alone. He’s fine with it - he pulls his weight out here in other ways after all. 

Sungho isn’t even meant to be out here, fighting for his life in the wild anyways. None of them are, really, but for them it’s in their blood. They’re all wild hybrids, instincts coming naturally to them, designed to put on muscle and move so that they can survive. For Sungho, his bloodline had gotten so muddled over the years all he knows is that he’s a cat. He doesn’t know the breed, doesn’t even know who his parents are, but just that he’s a domesticated cat. When he’s shifted, he’s smaller than Riwoo, with a white belly and an orange coat. It’s not a fact that particularly bothers Sungho, being a domestic hybrid in a world of wild ones, but he’s starting to think that maybe it should. 

“Um.” He’s edging on the border of their territory now, an area with long grass and bushes and now trees, when he comes face to face with a leopard. Sungho’s in his human form but even then, this cat is bigger and most definitely stronger than him. Sungho gets ready to run, already halfway through the mental process of shifting into his cat form. Maybe the wildcat would be stuck laughing for so long he could escape and grab Jaehyun or Woonhak. “Don’t kill me please,” he says, stepping back as the leopard gets closer. Before Sungho can fully shift and disappear into the grass, the leopard collapses at his feet. 

“Oh.” Sungho stares down. He wonders what a random passerby would make of this moment, a guy so clearly a house cat with his orange ears and fluffy tail, standing over a leopard like this. Does he need to get Woonhak or Jaehyun to help bring this guy back to the base?

 

“Sungho!” Jaehyun calls out, rushing forward when he sees the cat carrying another being on his back. “Are you okay? Did anything happen out there? Who’s this?”

“Calm down,” Sungho tells Jaehyun, internally also freaking out. “He collapsed on the border. Didn’t try to attack or anything. I’m pretty sure he’s hurt.”

“Alright. Okay. Okay, we can deal with hurt,” Jaehyun mutters, slapping himself. “Okay, what do you need?” He goes to take Sungho’s place, shifting the unconscious leopard on his own back. 

“Just lay him down on the mat,” Sungho responds. “I think we should have everything. Maybe get Riwoo to bring back some extra fish.”

“Do you want me around just in case he wakes up?” Jaehyun asks, watching as Sungho begins to gather all his supplies. Makeshift gauze and bandaids made of grass carefully weaved together, containers of sticky honey Woonhak had harvested earlier in the month, knives fashioned from stone and deer antler. Sungho can’t help the proud little smile every time he sees what their small little pack has been able to do for themselves. 

“I think it’s better for you or Woonhak to stay,” Sungho agrees. “You can probably start gathering firewood or drying the meat though. If I need help I’ll yell for you.”

“Whatever my Yeppi says,” Jaehyun answers, sending the cat a two finger salute before leaving the little hut. 

Sungho shakes his head, smiling, before he turns back to the leopard. “I wonder what happened to you?” he murmurs, carefully extending the other cat’s hind leg to get a look at the bloody mess. It was all fired out, causing the fur to be hard and sticky. The open wound seemed to be pretty deep, and it was more than likely infected. Sungho grabs an empty container, going to the line tree near the hut to gather some sap. “It’ll all be okay,” he tells the unconscious wildcat as he begins to get to work. 

 

When Taesan wakes up, for once it’s not to pain. He blinks, eyes trying to get used to the light. There’s faint arguing in the background, and when he focuses on it, it’s two voices bickering over who gets to eat the fish head. Surprisingly normal and domestic despite them being in the wild. Taesan tries to stay awake for longer, but he’s just so tired, and so he lets sleep take over again, some part of his brain reassured that they’re safe now.

Taesan drifts in and out of consciousness for the next few days, fighting a fever. The next time he properly comes to, he’s all sticky and sweaty but no longer feels as feverish as before. He huffs, blinking a few times before he properly takes stock of his surroundings. He’s in a hut, sunlight streaming in through the roof. There’s someone else in the room too, and when Taesan turns his head, he sees another cat. Except this one is much smaller than him, with an orange and white coat. They’re sleeping in a small patch of sunlight. A domestic cat. Out of place in the wilderness, which favors survival of the strong at its core. It makes Taesan smile, a little. He watches as the cat sleeps, unwilling to interrupt them. Eventually, though, they finally awaken when a cloud covers up the patch of sun streaming into the hut. 

“Mew.” The cat yawns, stretching, before it looks up and sees Taesan looking down on it. “Mew!” They exclaim, before they’re shifting and Taesan is now making eye contact with quite possibly the most gorgeous hybrid he’s ever seen. “Oh my god,” the cat hybrid groaned, little orange ears on his head turned back. “You scared me there.” 

Taesan rumbles, low in his throat, to try and reassure and apologize to the cat hybrid. He’s not usually this nice to people he’s just met - a lifetime of running away and fighting will do that to someone - but the orange cat is just so pretty. Even when he’s in his human form, he’s still so clearly a cat, not even counting the ears and tail that twitch around. His eyes are wide and curious, nose sharp, features delicate. Taesan can’t stop staring. 

“Leehan!” The cat sticks his head outside to yell, before he turns back to Taesan. “You were out for like four days. You had a hurt leg and a fever, but it’s okay now. You should be fine to walk, maybe hold back on the running and jumping for two weeks.”

Taesan nods. Attempts to at least. He can’t quite speak in his leopard form but doesn’t feel strong enough to shift. 

“Just rest,” the orange cat murmurs when he sees Taesan’s eyes begin to droop. “You don’t seem all that aggressive, so you can stay with us for as long as you need to.” 

Taesan sleeps yet again, warm and secure, dreaming of orange fur and big, kind eyes. 

 

Han Taesan makes a good addition to their pack. It’s been a bit over two weeks since Sungho had first scared the life out of Jaehyun by dragging back a leopard after his routine patrol. The leopard had been up and awake by the 9th day with the pack. Though his leg is still far too delicate to let him do more laborious work, he still tries to contribute to the pack though they’ve all insisted that he doesn’t need to. Jaehyun will wake up and see Taesan already out, holding dry sticks in his mouth for firewood. When he comes back from hunting in the evening, Taesan will be crouched around the fire, staring as Sungho skins and guts the fish Riwoo had brought back from the lake. 

Sungho. And Taesan. Jaehyun notices it, because he is their leader and this is his responsibility, but he’s not sure if anyone else has seen it. It’s subtle, more so since Taesan has only stayed shifted in his leopard form, but there’s something there. 

Jaehyun wakes up before Sungho for once, and when he watches the orange cat finally peek out from underneath the deer fur, yawning and stretching his arms, Taesan will stare. He’ll stare as Sungho slowly wakes up, blinking to get used to the sunlight. And then Taesan will look away, almost shyly, as Sungho wraps a skin around himself and goes inside to get dressed. When he comes back out, dressed in a loose shirt and pants, Taesan will also get up and follow as Sungho goes to check the containers they’d set on some trees to collect sap. 

Sungho goes on his routine foraging for medical supplies. Taesan will harrumph and then take a nap in the sun. He stays like that, dead to the world, until Sungho comes back with a basket of herbs and scavanehed vegetables. And then Taesan will awaken and go right back to following the other cat hybrid around much to Sungho’s delight, who laughs softly as Taesan lumbers over to take a spot beside him when dinner starts. 

Jaehyun giggles taking all of this in.

 

Park Sungho doesn’t really know what to do with Han Taesan. They only knew the leopard’s name because Woonhak had asked for the wildcat to draw it in the dirt with a stick. The five of them had watched with bated breath as the leopard had slowly scratched characters into the crowd, nodding when they’d repeated the name before them. 

“Taesan!” The orange cat calls out. “Do you want fish or meat today?” In his hands he holds out the bowls, one with dried jerky and the other with a boiled fish stew Riwoo made. The leopard makes a noise of contemplation before he eventually butts his head against the bowl with jerky. Sungho doesn’t say anything, but internally he’s also happy - preferring the soft texture of stewed fish to the rough one of jerky. 

Taesan happily munches down on the dried meat in front of him as Sungho sips from the bowl. He wonders. It’s been 16 days since he’d found Taesan, injured and sick, on their territory. His leg is healing well - it doesn’t hold him back anymore but Sungho still recommends the leopard to take it easy for at least another two weeks. Taesan still hasn’t shifted though. Not that he doesn’t have the strength too, but perhaps it’s just a little personal. They’ve all done their best to welcome the wildcat, all of them appreciating his company, but shifting is a trust thing. Sungho still wishes he could properly talk to Taesan one day though. “Ready to go patrol?” he asks, watching as the leopard gets up from where he’d been relaxing. “Jaehyun, we’re going!” Sungho calls out, waving bye at the wolf hybrid. 

Taesan follows behind him, a silent shadow as Sungho checks their borders. “There was a storm while you were sick,” the cat says. “It was pretty bad, so we haven’t been able to venture out here since it was so muddy. Careful of falling trees and that stuff.” Taesan makes an affirmative noise, and the two continue to trek all along the pack border, remarking places where their scent had started to fade. 

Sungho’s patrol today takes them through the forest, right until the edge of the lake. He carefully steps, keeping an eye out for any signs of danger, Taesan right beside him. The lake waters are calm, and Sungho’s able to see small bodies darting here and there in the water. Too small to catch, but Leehan will be delighted that breeding season has started. Soon they’ll be able to start flipping over rocks in search of crayfish. “We made like a seafood boil once,” Sungho tells Taesan. “Last summer, I’m pretty sure. Me and Woonhak got a bunch of wild potatoes and corn, and Riwoo and Leehan caught us a bunch of crayfish and fish. It was great.” Taesan lets out a mrrr sound, as if agreeing. “If you stay, you’ll be able to try it with us this year.” Sungho mentions the idea offhandedly, but internally, he’s nervous. They haven’t been able to talk about it, about Taesan and his stay with them, but the leopard seems to be in no hurry to leave and all five of them had agreed to let him stay if he so wanted. 

Mrrrrr. Taesan sounds firmer this time, and Sungho takes that as an agreeable sound. He smiles, lifting a hand to ask for permission to pet Taesan’s head which is granted when the leopard headbutts against it, letting Sungho scratch behind his ears. 

“Going to shift now.” Sungho closes his eyes and when he opens them, he’s much lower to the ground, having to look up at Taesan. He flicks his tail. Let’s go. Taesan follows. 

It’s going splendidly. Taesan is so big, especially now that Sungho is in his cat form, the ginger cat only coming up to like an eight of the leopard’s size. He’s a reassuring presence as Sungho steps through the bog. He doesn’t have to worry as much as Taesan, his small size allowing him to be a little more carefree with where he steps, but he still tries to be cautious. Taesan is with him and he doesn’t know this area, not like Sungho does. So Sungho leaps towards areas he knows have firmer ground, scales the branches he knows will hold both their weights rather than run across the mud like he regularly does. 

Except he falls. Sungho and Taesan hop onto a patch of firmer ground, Sungho landing first and then stumbling, muddy paws unable to give him any grip before he slides into an area he knows is just mud. He struggles. He kicks and kicks, but can’t get out, instead begins to sink.

Taesan. Sungho mewls desperately, looking at Taesan who’s staring back at him with an expression just as distressed. The leopard is there, hovering nervously, like he wants to pick Sungho up but doesn’t want to have to scruff him. Sungho tries to shift, he does, but that’s basically impossible to do in an environment where his movement is limited. 

Sungho’s going to kill himself if he dies in a way like this. 

Fortunately for everyone, he doesn’t. 

“Shit.” There’s a curse, a voice low and rough from disuse speaking behind him. “I got you, I got you,” it murmurs as pale hands reach around, scooping him from underneath. “Don’t worry, Sungho-ssi, I got you.” 

Sungho feels the breath get knocked out of him, oxygen leaving his lungs, but that might just be because his current position leaves the hands under his stomach whilst the rest of the body is hanging in the air, placing extra pressure on that part and making it hard to breathe. The guy holding him is tall, probably taller than even Woonhak in his human form, and has dark hair with blonde tips. He’s broad, clearly well-muscled,  leopard ears on his head and a long tail lashing from side to side behind him. Ah, some part of Sungho’s brain registers. This pretty guy is Taesan. “Meow.” Thank god he’s in his cat form. It lets him say stupid things he doesn’t think through without Taesan understanding. Like asking for the guy’s number. They’re in the wild for god's sake, mountain ranges and forests separating them from any human civilization, but Sungho is a domestic cat at heart. “Mew.”

“Ah, cute.” Taesan smiles, carefully adjusting his grip so Sungho can finally breathe comfortably again. Which involves him shifting so one arm is supporting Sungho’s hind legs whilst the other presses the cat against the side of his chest, front paws hanging on his shoulder. “There, there, hyung. I think I call you that? You’re the same age as the otter and wolf, I’ve heard, which means you’re a year older than me.” A chuckle. 

Wow. This wasn’t part of the plan. Sungho should stay as a cat forever lest Taesan see how red he is right now, plastered on his chest. Sungho’s skin feels like fire where they make contact with each other, Taesan’s muscles tensing and relaxing. Suddenly it feels like summer. “Meow,” Sungho pathetically meows because he is a weak, weak housecat at the mercy of a big, strong wildcat. Maybe not to that extreme, he’s pretty sure he’s being a little over dramatic but. 

Taesan laughs. Sungho feels the muscles contracting and twitching from where they’re pressed against his stomach. He sort of wants to kill himself.

“Mrow,” he says instead, muddy and wet and pathetic, and Taesan stares at him with big, adoring eyes, a grin on his face. 

 

Taesan hasn’t shifted in almost a month now. It feels freeing to finally be able to. He walks quickly through the swamp, not even flinching at the way his bare feet sink into the mud. Sungho stays in his arms, wet and warm, and Taesan fights the urge to tuck the cat underneath his chin. He doesn’t shift, not regularly. It’s the easiest way to make himself more vulnerable, no sharp claws or fangs in his human form. All he has is height and an intimidating aura but even that’s called into question when Taesan has to trudge his way through a swamp, wet and grump, fueled by the desire to impress a certain orange cat in his arms. He’d shifted this time, though. Scruffing Sungho would’ve been too painful for the cat. 

“Ah, we’re at the lake shore now,” Taesan hums, feet hitting the grainy sand. “I think you should wash off, Sungho-hyung.”

The orange cat lets out an agreeing meow and Taesan carries him into the water until it’s chest-deep. The waves wash the mud of the two of them and the leopard revels in the feeling of being clean again. The cat in his arms seems to be feeling the same, experimentally dunking his face into the water, eye crinkled similar to the way his human form’s face smiles. “Mew!”

“Mew,” Taesan echoes back. “Can you shift here? I want to talk to you when we’re both in human form.” Wow. Time has Taesan being bold from unfamiliarity and forgetfulness. He just wants to see Sungho like this, where they’re equals, both shifted and can communicate properly with each other. And maybe, just maybe, wants to reenact those scenes from shows where people would tuck each other’s hair behind their ears. 

A voice rings out, clearly human. “Meow.” It’s soft, deadpan, and Taesan whirls around to finally properly meet eyes with Sungho. Oxygen leaves his lungs in a strangled sort of groan, thankfully drowned out by the sounds of the water around them. Sungho is a good few inches shorter than Taesan in human form, the perfect height to be tucked under his chin. He’s broad, wide shoulder sloping down into a small waist. The wildcat tries not to think about how if he tried to wrap his around the it, his fingers would probably touch. 

“Hyung.” Sungho’s eyes are so big and shiny, staring back at him like he’s the one who hung the stars in the sky. It’s the way he looks at everything, with unfiltered emotion, able to find joy in even the smallest things. “Sungho-hyung, let’s go back.” Taesan tentatively reaches out and Sungho meets him halfway, fingers intertwining. The touch burns, but that doesn’t matter because they’re deep enough that their hands are underwater, the leopard gently leading the cat back to shore. 

“You look good,” Sungho comments, grinning when they’re back on dry land. Taesan flushes, face turning red. He tries to hide it with his hands, but there are the telltale signs of Sungho laughing and he finds he doesn’t really mind it. “Let’s go back, Taesan-ah.” 

Independent, strong leopard Han Taesan takes the hand stretched out towards him, following behind the orange cat. Like how the sun guides a lost traveler, he walks eyes only on the boy in front of him.



Notes:

have you seen the way Taesan folds every time sungho does aegyo
also their size difference Wow Sungho looks so teeny tiny beside him while beside other members he doesn’t seem that small even if he’s shorter
honestly if you asked me id say Taesan is a panther (since yk...blakc cat) but if he says he's a leopard he is a leopard!
will maybe make a sequel to this later on

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