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It was late. Brabant had fallen asleep a while ago, and Hans was alone with his thoughts. As grating Brabant could be at times, his company made being imprisoned easier as his stories could usually provide a welcomed distraction for a little while. When it was just him, the imprisonment became harder to tolerate. He never liked enclosed spaces, but the feeling of the walls closing in became overwhelming as he knew he could not escape them. Hans could feel it now, the tightening sensation that made him want to flee, but there was no place he could go. He drank his wine and went to the only thing that could bring him relief when the sensation got too much, the window. Although Hans knew he was still in a cage, he found that staring at the sky made the feeling disappear for a while.
Hans hated it and hated this place. It did not matter how well he was treated; he was trapped there, and Henry was far away. This was the first time in this whole horrid experience that Henry was not either imprisoned with him or close by and his stomach churned. It was worse knowing Henry was not getting such decent accommodations. Hans refused to believe that Henry was dead. People knew he was Radzig’s bastard, and surely it would be worth waiting to see if Radzig would ransom him before they killed him. Hans believed Radzig would, and he had prayed many times that the men who had Henry would believe it too. Yet he also knew Henry was still officially unacknowledged so that arse Toth and the others would not feel the need to treat him well. Hans had sworn that whatever they were doing to Henry, he would do to them ten-fold.
You can rely on me. Always.
Henry had never let him down, and Hans swallowed the lump in his throat. He felt like Galehaut and Lancelot, though this time, they were both captured and separated. Hans finally understood why Galehaut was so upset Lancelot was stolen from him. He had always liked the story, but he never fully understood it. Hans never had a friendship quite like that. As much as he wished for one, he was always too young to be friends with the other noblemen in the area and too noble for the other youths. Then Henry came into his life, and everything changed. He supposed Henry was not a true equal, but he was Lord Radzig’s bastard and had proven himself the truest friend a man could ask for despite everything that happened. Being without him felt as though a piece of him was missing.
You’re the closest friend I have.
Despite his anger, Hans had missed Henry terribly and regretted his behavior. He had been grateful that Henry had accepted his apology and had been so willing to put the whole thing behind them. Henry still considered him his closest friend, and Henry was Hans’s. After that, their friendship had been just as strong as before, perhaps even better now that Hans could see what a precious thing he had found. It felt as though Hans had found his own personal Lancelot. He looked at the moon and wondered if Henry could see it. He prayed quietly for Henry’s safety and hoped Henry was waiting for him.
It was hard, but Hans was trying to be smarter and do better. He needed to be patient and find the right opportunity to escape. Hans had been scouting as much as he could while he was let out, listening to the guard movement outside the door, and Hans was sure he would find something. He had not discussed it with Brabant yet, but he was hopeful the Frenchman might be useful when the time to escape came. He just needed Henry to hold on. Things would be very different once they were both free and finished with this damned task.
I’ll stand by you.
He smiled to himself. Picturing what life would be like after this was all over was one of Hans’s favorite things to do while trying to forget the walls or the feeling of being crushed. Even if Radzig did not acknowledge Henry, Hans would finally get declared an adult and make sure Henry got his due. He would make sure Henry received the training he required to get his knighthood. Then Hans would knight him.
He liked the idea of being the one to knight Henry. He could see the day well. Henry would be dressed in his finest, going down on one knee. He would look up at Hans with those blue eyes and kiss his ring before Hans made him a knight. After that, Hans would give him a role in his household, something that would ensure Henry received the respect he deserved. After that, Henry would never have to bow so low again, but he would for Hans, probably with that same teasing smile Henry got when he called Hans ‘Noble Sir’. Henry would grin as he got on one knee before Hans and kiss his hand as he looked up at him with those blue eyes. Hans wondered if Lancelot had ever kissed Galehaut’s hand or if Galehaut had kissed Lancelot’s. Hans pictured himself kissing Henry’s hand. He was unsure why he would do it, but he liked the image of Henry looking away, smiling and slightly embarrassed.
It was easy to imagine them strolling through the courtyard as the people bowed to both him and Henry, as Mutt followed him loyally, and Pebbles resided in stables far grander than what anyone else would spend on her. Mutt and Pebbles always made Henry happy. Hans considered it. He needed to add a forge, even if forges were an odd choice for a castle. Henry enjoyed blacksmithing, and even if he would not need to do it anymore, he should still have an option if he wished. Hans could imagine Henry concentrating on his work, his eyes sharp and focused, his muscles firm as he hammered the bright red metal. His arms and shoulders always looked impressive as Henry worked. It was hard for Hans to look away sometimes.
It would be a good life, the two of them in a great castle over a prosperous land, sharing fine wine and food and seducing beautiful wenches like Galehaut and Lancelot. Henry was good with women, so Hans imagined it would not be hard to find wenches who would happily fall into bed with them. Hans had never shared a woman with another man before, but if it was Henry, he would be willing to try it. Hans sighed. It had been too long since he had had a proper fuck.
Sir Hans.
Hans smiled at the chastising tone he could hear from Henry’s voice. He liked the idea of grand feasts with beautiful women hanging off them, but what he wanted most at that moment was a quiet evening with just Henry. He could picture it, the two of them in a sitting room or library, sitting in front of a roaring fire, drinking wine and talking, maybe playing dice. Mutt would be sleeping on the rug in front of it. It would be peaceful as they bantered and bickered. He could see Henry’s smile and his bright blue eyes as he would laugh at Hans’s joke. He would be happy and safe, well fed on good food, and far from wherever Toth was keeping him now. Hans would make sure of that.
Was that Galehaut wanted for Lancelot? To just make sure he was cared for and wanted for nothing? It hurt not knowing if Henry was alright, knowing he was probably dealing with rough treatment while he was sitting high above, getting decent wine and games. His hands clutched the wood and wished it was anything else, the steel of a sword made by Henry, Mutt, and Henry himself as they trained, drank, or bathed together. Once Hans got out of there, either by ransom or escape, he would get Henry back.
Hans
His Henry.