Chapter Text
Fear of the dark is not uncommon among children. It is, in fact, one of the most common fears. Along with fear of abandonment, and fear of monsters. It is a sad thing, when a child first learns fear. Not just the fear that babies come out already knowing, but when they truly learn how evil the world was. When their fear is based on real dangers, rather than just imagined monsters. What is even worse is when children have no one to protect them from having to face their fears.
Spencer knew, since he had the ability to know anything, that his mother saw monsters that weren’t real. That she was afraid of them, even when he told her that they didn’t exist. He learned about ‘Paranoid Schizophrenia’ around the same time as he was learning words such as cat, dog, school, and car. His mother was always afraid of something, and Spencer tried not to be afraid like she was. He tried to be brave, even when his mother’s imagined monsters lead to her grabbing him too hard, or screaming at him. He tried to be brave, even when it meant eating the sour, burnt, raw, or rotten food his mother often fed him.
Spencer was brave, except for when it came to the dark. No matter how many times he tried to conquer that fear, it stayed there. Like a weight in the pit of his stomach. If anyone asked him why he was scared of the dark, he’d say it was because of the inherent absence of light. Because bad people do bad things in the dark.
Spencer was four years old when he learned fear personally. When fear became a real, tangible thing for him.
“Spencer, want to walk home with me?” Riley asked. He was older than Spencer by a few years, but he’d always been kind to the younger boy. They were even on the same t-ball team, though there was an age difference. “My dad isn’t here yet, and I haven’t seen your mom anywhere.”
“I… I don’t know,” Spencer said.
William Reid was usually the coach of the team, but he had to work, so Mr. Adams was their coach for the day. And when William wasn’t there, it meant Diana was supposed to pick Spencer up from the park… But she usually forgot. Which meant Spencer usually had to walk home alone… when he did so, he put off going home for as long as possible. He didn’t like being home when his mother was in one of her moods, when she was either eerily quiet or screaming at the top of her lungs. Even though it was a trade off, his mother usually yelled at him for not being home sooner, it was better to spend more time at the park…
“We can play games at my house for a little while,” Riley said, to sweeten the offer. “Until you have to go home.”
“Okay,” Spencer replied. Walking with someone was better than walking alone. And he liked spending time at the Jenkins house.
The Jenkins lived three doors down from the Reids, so the boys often hung out together. During the day, while his father was at work, Reid would either be hanging out with Riley, or with Jeff from down the street.
“I got a new Lego set,” Riley said, as they started their trek home. “That ship from that TV show you said you like.”
“The U.S.S. Enterprise?” Spencer asked, excitedly. He didn’t have any Legos at home, so the only time he got to play with them was when Riley invited him over. He had, however, looked at the set every time they went to the store. But it was always too much… Or, at least, that’s what his father said every time he asked for it. So he stopped asking.
“Yep,” Riley said.
The older boy got to talking about a new video game his uncle had gotten him, telling Spencer all about the story, and what it was like to play it. While Spencer wasn’t interested, he liked listening to Riley talk. Riley never shouted, or got angry. He always seemed happy. And Riley liked how Spencer listened. That’s what made them such good friends.
They got to the Jenkins house, and headed down to the basement that doubled as Riley’s ‘play room’. Riley brought out the Lego set, and they started reading the instructions. Spencer organized the Lego pieces by type, then by each step of the build. The instructions started with the saucer section, so that was what they started with.
Riley talked about school, and his friends. About his parents. Everything sounded so… Happy. Home was never happy. Which was why Spencer really liked the Jenkins house so much.
It was just after four, which meant Spencer had about an hour to hang out before he had to go home. His father got off work at five, which meant Spencer needed to be home no later than five fifteen. While his mother didn’t care about where he was most of the time, if he wasn’t home by the time his father got home, his parents would get into a fight. They always fought loudly… Screamed at each other. So Spencer always made sure he was home in time.
Riley stated that he was hungry. He said he was going to get snacks, and he headed upstairs to the kitchen, while Spencer continued to build the Lego set. It was a full fifteen minutes before Riley returned, with two bags of microwave popcorn.
“Sorry, I had to take out the trash before my parents get home,” Riley said, settling down at the coffee table, and opening his bag of popcorn.
“It’s okay,” Spencer said, cause he didn’t know what else to say. He didn’t think there was anything Riley had to apologize for, but when people apologized they usually wanted a response.
They finished up the saucer section, while Riley kept eating his popcorn. Spencer didn’t open his bag of popcorn, cause he didn’t want to have greasy fingers while building the Legos.
Spencer could hear the sound of someone enter the house above them, and footsteps echo through the house, down to the basement. Footsteps that didn’t belong to Mr. or Mrs. Jenkins. He knew what their steps sounded like, and Spencer could tell the difference. The footsteps were heavy, with a bit of a scuff on the right step, like the person had a limp.
“Riley, we need to hide,” Spencer said, panicking at the sound of the stranger in the house.
“Why, Silly? It’s just my dad coming home… Or maybe my mom got off work early,” Riley commented, completely unworried.
“No, it’s not,” Spencer said, looking around for a place to hide.
It wasn’t like he could hide under the covers… There were no covers to hide under. But… In the corner of the room there was a closet. One that the Jenkins kept their winter clothes in.
“Please believe me!” Spencer pleaded with his friend.
Riley laughed, and continued to build the set.
Spencer crawled under the pile of heavy coats in the bottom of the closet, leaving the door cracked open in hopes that his friend would join him.
Heavy footsteps started down the basement stairs. Spencer pressed his fist to his mouth, to avoid making a sound. He’d never been so scared in his life. He wasn’t even sure why he was so terrified, he just knew something bad was going to happen.
The footsteps hit the bottom of the stairs, and the lights turned off. Riley squeaked, the older boy had always been afraid of the dark… Spencer could still see through the opened door, even in the dark. He could make out the outline of a man, but that was it.
Riley was moving around, Spencer could hear it, but he didn’t know what the older boy was doing. He hoped he was hiding…
The man started talking to Riley, and his voice was like pitch and acid. Dark, sour, and painful to listen to. The man moved forward, closer to the coffee table. Riley screamed, and the man yelled at him to be silent. There were other sounds, too. Movement, Legos falling to the ground, angry voices, the squeak of the coffee table… Spencer covered his ears, and closed his eyes. He didn’t know what was happening, but he didn’t want to hear those awful sounds.
Riley was screaming… He wouldn’t stop screaming, no matter how much the man yelled at him….
Spencer now knew what it was to truly fear. The darkness felt darker, somehow. Like even the possibility of light was gone. He kept his hands pressed to his ears, even though he could still hear those awful sounds… His eyes were scrunched up so tight that his head started to hurt.
When the sounds stopped, Spencer opened his eyes again, peaking out of the closet. He saw the man crouching behind the washer, and Riley’s red converse peeking out from behind it. The man stood up, and turned to look around the room. It was only then that Spencer could see the man’s face.
He looked… Spencer recognized him. It was the man who’d asked to play chess with him the week before. Spencer had won, but he hadn’t been paying attention to what the man was saying to him.
Spencer pressed his lips tightly together, to stop from making a sound. His eyes were watery, and he had to blink away the tears that blurred his vision.
Riley wasn’t moving… He wasn’t moving at all. There was a pool of dark stuff seeping out from where he lay.
The man turned back towards the stairs, and left. Spencer listened for the footsteps, and heard the front door open, then slam shut. Still, he stayed put. It was a very long fifteen minutes, and the man didn’t return, so Spencer left the closet, and ran over to his friend.
Blood covered the ground, spreading out from the nine stab wounds in the boy’s chest. Riley’s mouth was covered in duct tape… There was no rise and fall to Riley’s chest, and Spencer knew that meant he wasn’t breathing. Riley was… he was… Spencer ran. Up the stairs, and out the back door.
He ran to the street, and all the way to his house, before he finally stopped to take a breath. He was terrified, and he quickly looked around to make sure the man wasn’t watching him.
The man was nowhere to be seen, but still, Spencer didn’t feel safe. He wanted to go inside, and hide in his own room… But he couldn’t go inside quite yet. His shoes were covered in his friends blood… His mom would freak out if he came home with blood on his shoes… So Spencer took his shoes off, and tossed them in the neighbors trash can, before entering his house.
His mother wasn’t anywhere to be found, when he got home, so he went to his bed, and curled up. Finally, he cried. No one could hear him, and he didn’t want them to. He was exhausted, terrified, and couldn’t seem to move.
He must have drifted off to sleep, because the next thing he knew, he was woken by the sound of police sirens. A little while later, there was a pounding on his front door, but he didn’t move. He drifted off again, cause all of a sudden he heard his parents fighting. Yelling at each other. Their voices were loud, and he wished they would stop…
Spencer’s door opened, and he froze. His father’s footsteps approached, and the bed dipped under his father’s weight. Spencer squeezed his eyes shut, hoping his father would go away. He didn’t want to talk. Didn’t want to do anything but sleep.
“I know you’re awake, Spencer,” William Reid said. “Daddy loves you, you know that right?”
He put his hand on Spencer’s shoulder, and the young boy flinched away. He didn’t want to be touched. He just wanted to disappear… To just… To stop existing. Until things were better. Until the nightmare was over.
The next morning, William told them that they were moving. Apparently William got a job in Virginia. But Spencer knew that wasn’t the only reason they were moving. He knew they were moving because of Riley. Because of what happened… He didn’t mind. He didn’t want to be there anymore. His friend was gone, and he was sure he wouldn’t feel safe until he was far away from the man who killed his friend.
They moved by the end of the month.