Chapter Text
Sean sits at his desk, claws tapping against the polished wood, his head in his other hand. He was bored, paper work was the worst part of this job, fuck the constant trauma this shit was mind numbing.
Sean sighs in relief as there was a knock at his door, Alex probably had a report on how the simulation was going. He hoped it wasn’t over yet, he didn’t want to have to face Robert or Kim. He doesn’t think he could handle it. He was going to avoid thinking about how he went out, he did not have the mental bandwidth to deal with the social consequences.
Sean slips his gas mask back on over his face, making sure he looked secure and presentable before he opens the door.
“Boss.”
“Alex, I assume you have an update for me?”
“Robert and Saber won.”
“Saber survived?”
“Yes Sir.”
“How?”
“Robert spared him.”
“How did Shadow and Kim die?”
“Kim died trying to ender pearl himself to safety, Shadow betrayed Robert because he was irradiated. Robert killed him and let him die ‘peacefully’ as he said.”
“Hm, send me the footage later, I’m almost done with this report. Thank you Ale-“
“Sir.”
Sean bristles as Alex cuts him off, he has been speak— “Robert and Kim has requested to see you. They forced their way out of the infirmary.”
“They what?”
“Shadow convinced them to wait for me to bring you an update, but they will not wait much longer.”
“Tell them I’m not coming, and if I need to lock them in their rooms I will.”
“Yes Sir.”
Sean closes the door on Alex, locking it before disabling the electrical system that allowed the door to slide open rather than swing. His friends wouldn’t destroy the facility just to talk to him…. Would they?
Sean turns around, tail lashing behind him in anger, how dare they demand to talk to him! They knew he was busy for days after each scenario, that he did not have time to answer their questions. Besides Robert had won, why the fuck did it matter that he lost?
Sean slumps into his chair, wrapping his tail around his legs. Zangar had been MIA so Sean had no clue if he could reverse the change. He didn’t know how he would hide something like this, aside from just cutting it off.
Sean growls to himself, before it trails off to a sigh. He removes his gasmask, placing it back down on his desk as he runs a hand over his face. This time successfully avoiding nearly stabbing the new eyes that had grown around his right eye. He was matching Robert and his skulk now he mused.
Back to work Sean, you have shit to do. He chastises himself, returning his attention back to his laptop. He had a long ass report to type out didn’t he?
——————————
“He said no?” Shadow asks, looking to the Security Chief standing before them as they sat in the lounge room.
“Verbatim he said; Tell them I’m not coming, and if I need to lock them in their rooms I will.” The Blond haired guard confirmed.
“What dah hell!” Kim cries, glaring in outrage at the Security Chief.
“He can’t just refuse to come talk to us! You saw what he did right?” Robert snaps as he paces around the room, trying to work out the agitation filling his body into the ground below.
“I am well aware of the Boss’s actions, but th-“
“He killed himself! We’re just supposed to let go and ignore that?!”
“For the time being, yes. The Boss is very busy, I’m sure he will come talk to once he’s finished his work.”
“We all know he won’t.”
“I cannot speak for the boss.”
Robert groans, running a hand through his messy hair, he needed to wash it once he got the chance.
“Are you sure you can’t convince him, uh..?” Shadow queries, taking over the conversation for Robert.
“Security Chief Alex, or simply Chief Alex, and yes I am very sure. You all know the boss better than I. You know how stubborn he is, and by now he has probably barricaded his office door and escaped through a hidden passageway after assuming the three of you were on your way to talk to him.”
Shadow nods in agreement, they all knew how Sean got when he was paranoid or feeling particularly closed off. “Yeah… when is the next assignment?”
“Two months from now. The demand for more data has increased significantly.”
“That’s longer than they gave us last time, who’s going?”
“It’s not decided yet, but either Robert and Sean, or all four of you. There’s two anomalies Mustard Containment Surveillance detected, they are currently deciding which is of the more pressing matter.”
“Are we privy to know what it will be?”
“Unfortunately not.”
“Of course we don’t get to know! Sean’s the only one who does beforehand!” Kim gripes, sitting up straighter in his chair. To point an accusatory finger and Chief Alex. Shadow could understand Kim’s anger, so could Robert.
Alex gives the group a sympathetic stare, he knew the anger they felt, he felt it in his younger years working here, the higher ups never telling him anything until they were sent out on a recon mission. “I’m sorry, If i could tell you I would, but this job pays well and so does staying on Sean’s good side.”
“Right… can you atleast tell us how he is?” Robert asks, finally stopping his pacing to stare at Alex, the poor guy looked desperate.
“I don’t know much…. But he seemed fine when I talked to him, just stressed and tired. He did get particularly tense when I mentioned you three. He’s scared to confront you I suppose.”
“Damn right he should! He blew up mah house!-”
“Kim. Now is not the time, your house is always getting blown up.” Robert chastises, walking over and patting the shorter man's head. Probably more to just soothe his own nerves than Kims. Kim slumps back down in his chair, grumbling something incoherent to himself as he crosses his arms over his chest.
Shadow sighs. “Tell him we’ll wait. He can come to us when he’s ready…”
“What?! Why would you say that! He’s never gonna come–” Kim exclaims, moving to sit back up, but is stopped by Robert's hand on his chest.
“Kim please, Shadow’s right to make that call. Pushing him won’t get us anywhere when he can just shut us out.” Robert pleads to reason with Kim, hoping the shorter man wouldn't go and blow down Sean’s office door. Kim looks to Shadow for support, before realizing that he wouldn’t get any given Shadow proposed the idea. The Norwegian man deflates, seeming to lose the fight in him. All three of them were tired. More so Shadow and Kim, given both actually ‘died’ during the purge.
“Shall I go inform the boss?”
“Yeah, that’d be great. Thank you Alex.”
——————————
The next month was spent with Shadow and Kim getting their strength back up, their ‘deaths’ hadn’t been as… painful as others, but it still left them weaker than usual. Robert took the role of care taker, splitting up squabbles between Kim and Shadow (it was usually a one sided squabble) and making sure they got their strength up in time for the next mission.
Robert was looking over his notes (and others) regarding the scenario, he had the ‘privilege’ to work with MI’s Research department. Being the head of his own rather small division was still a lot of work, considering he was constantly being sent out on multi month long expeditions only to come home and be greeted with a backlog of work.
It was tiring, mind numbing, tedious work and Robert hated it, but it payed really fucking well. It was one of the reasons he could live as lavishly as he could, and he didn’t mean that in the way say a YouTuber would mean, no. He meant it in the way he could afford medical treatments and proper equipment. Most of his medical bills were covered by MI’s insurance policy but for the few that weren’t he always had the money for it. For such a shit job the benefits were astounding, it was the only thing that kept morale steady during dire times and the field researchers working.
Robert leans back in his cushioned office chair, staring blankly at the ceiling. He thought about Sean, he worried about Sean, and he was angry at Sean. They hadn’t seen as much as a glimpse of the scientist since they had returned. The only update they ever got was from Alex saying that Sean hadn’t gotten any better, and he wasn’t sure if he had gotten worse.
“Robert?”
Robert is pulled from his musing as he spins in his chair to face the curious voice. “Yes Shadow?”
“Any updates on who’s going out?”
“No, not yet.”
Shadow sighs and leans against the door frame to Robert’s humble office and lab. “Anything interesting at all?”
“Unless you consider cross referencing and comparing notes interesting? No.”
“I’ve done enough paperwork for a lifetime.” Shadow shakes his head, cringing at the thought of ever having to do it again. Spending hours bent over a desk flopping through papers and files… ugh. Sent a shiver down his spine.
“Anything else you need?”
“Not really, just wondering if you’ve gotten word from Sean?”
“No, I haven’t yet.”
“Great.” Shadow huffs, leaning his head back to stare at the top of the door frame as he hummed in thought. Did he have any more questions for Robert? Not really, he didn’t have anything to talk about either. He just kind of missed the comfort of his friends. “Mind if I chill in here for a while?”
“No not at all, go ahead. Beanbags in the back corner.”
“Thanks.”
——————————
Sean paced through his office, his breath coming in harsh ragged gasps. He didn’t even know what had triggered this, but his heart was beating too hard, his eyes burned with tears, his ears rang, and his limbs were shaking. But he couldn’t just sit down, he had to move. He couldn’t stop moving even if he wasn’t going anywhere but in circles.
Sean digs his claws into his hair, clawing at his scalp as he tugged on it. Tears fell from his eyes and hit the carpeted floor. His legs felt weak and his tail hung limp.
He had to keep moving.
“Sean, you need to sit down.”
“I— I can’t. I need— I need to move Zangar!” Sean snaps, his tone flip flopping between borderline sobbing and anger.
“You are going to fall over.”
“I know that! Just— just shut up!” Sean nearly shrieks, uncaring for how loud he was being. His room was sound proofed. Thankfully Zangar didn’t speak again and Sean could feel the other retreat to the back of his(their?) mind(s?).
True to Zangara words Sean was only able to mange a few more laps before his legs gave out and he collapsed to the floor, his resolve to not sob breaking down with him. He curled into a ball and let the tears flow.
————
Sean laid on his bed, idly scrolling through his phone, doing nothing in particular but wallowing in his self pity and sadness. He couldn’t bring himself to do any work or talk to anyone not even Zangar.
He was just so tired and exhausted, both emotionally and physically. His entire body felt stiff and sore for no apparent reason. His tail ached all along the sides. Sometimes it felt like he was being stabbed from the inside out. He had tried taking some advil, but it hasn’t helped. He sure as hell wasn’t about to stand up to go get some heavier pain killers from the infirmary with the risk of having to confront his friends. So instead he would lay here and just suffer through it.