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Phee woke up to the sound of heavy breathing and movement in her and Tech’s bedroom. She started awake, sitting up and trying to force sleep from her brain, automatically assuming there was some kind of threat. She felt panicked for a moment when she realized Tech wasn’t next to her.
But it only took her a few seconds to spot his shadowy figure by the door of the bedroom, bent over and trying to put on his shoes. The sounds were coming from him, and only him. He seemed to already be out of his sleepwear and dressed, though she couldn’t be sure in the dim lighting.
“Tech?” She asked, and he flinched a bit, looking over at her briefly before focusing back on his shoes. She could tell he was trembling even in the darkness of the room. She glanced at their clock and saw it was just after five in the morning.
“M-my apologies,” Tech finally spoke, tone shaky and uncertain, “I… n-need some air.”
“Don’t apologize,” she tossed the covers off and got up, “Give me a minute and I’ll go—”
“Y-you don’t have to,” he had finished with his shoes, straightened up, but still didn’t look at her.
“Would it help you if I did?”
Tech was silent for a moment, took another shaky breath, “... Perhaps.”
“It’s settled, then. Give me two minutes.”
Tech nodded silently and exited the bedroom. She quickly changed into something suitable for going out and fixed her hair. She was nearly done, and it had only been a minute, when she heard the front door open and shut, and she realized Tech had left without her. She grimaced. It was bad if he couldn’t even wait for her.
She quickly finished, then ran out the door. It was dark out except for some streetlights, and she looked both ways and barely spotted Tech’s figure before he turned down another path.
But she knew this route already. This sort of thing happened more often than Tech liked to admit, so Phee knew his habits. And even if he tried to downplay it or didn’t want to worry her, he needed her, in some way, during these moments.
So she’d be there, no matter what.
Phee followed his typical route, occasionally getting glimpses of him in the distance that reassured her he was going the usual route. He always walked all the way down through town to the beach. As he grew closer to the beach, he slowed down, and Phee managed to catch up— quickening her pace to close the remaining distance— as he walked out onto the sand.
She somewhat knew what was about to happen, but that didn’t make it any less painful when his breathing shifted to rapid, short gasps, and his legs buckled underneath him, taking him to his knees onto the sand. Phee knelt in front of him, making sure she was in his line of sight, and held out her hand to him.
He grasped it, grip tight and firm, like she was his only lifeline. His head was tilted downwards, eyes on the sand. Phee swallowed and blinked quickly as a familiar emotion surfaced in her chest, seeing Tech panic and spiral. She wished there was more she could do, but she knew right now her presence was all that she could offer. Hopefully, it’d be enough.
“I’m right here, Tech,” she said quietly after a few moments, “Wherever you think you are— you’re not. We’re all safe. You’re safe.”
Tech didn’t give her much of a response, but she didn’t let that deter her. She continued to say phrases like that, remind him of her presence, and just hold him secure for the next several minutes.
She was never sure how long these attacks would last, but she could hold him steady for as long as they did. She knew he’d do the same— he had already, on multiple occasions— if their situations were reversed.
Eventually his breathing began to steady, with long inhales and shaky exhales. She squeezed his hand in encouragement, and felt him squeeze back. That was a good sign. Finally, after another minute or two, he looked up at her and met her eyes.
Her heart clenched. His eyes were still so scared— so heartbroken. His eyes shouldn’t ever have to look like that.
“Hey,” she said, smiling slightly, “You’re alright.”
Tech nodded and leaned forward, and she released his hand and wrapped him in a hug. She felt his arms come up around her to reciprocate it, and then she just… held him. She felt his breathing on her back and near where his head rested on her shoulder, felt the warmth radiating from his body, felt how he was still trembling the slightest bit. She rubbed his back with one hand, and slowly brought the other up to the back of his head, running her fingers through his hair in a motion she knew he had found comforting in the past.
The beach was dark and quiet, the sound of the gentle waves crashing the only sound this early in this particular spot. It was peaceful. Calm. She felt Tech’s trembling lessen until it was nearly gone— until he was truly calm again— and he pulled back from the hug and settled for sitting next to her and holding her hand again. He looked out toward the water, where the faintest bit of sunlight was beginning to show up with the sunrise.
He was so quiet during these moments— unlike his usual self— but Phee was okay with his silence as much as she was okay with his regular rambling. Even though it hurt her to see him quiet because of this. Because he was hurting.
“I apologize for waking you so early… again,” he eventually said, quietly.
“We’ve been over this, Brown Eyes,” she said, using the nickname to put him at ease, “I don’t mind, and it was part of the deal when I married you, wasn’t it?”
He looked at her, frowning, “Technically, that was not in our vows—”
She rolled her eyes, “It was implied,” she waved her free hand out towards the water, “And look at this view anyway— it’s not all bad.”
“No,” he said, but he wasn’t looking at the oncoming sunrise, he was staring at her, “It is not.”
“I was talking about the sun, Tech,” she said in a light tone, smirking.
“I am aware,” he said, “You just look very nice.”
She looked down at her clothes, “In the outfit I put on in about thirty seconds in the dark?”
“Yes,” he said, without hesitation, and then released her hand and shifted to put his arm around her, turning so they both faced the ocean directly.
“Hm, you’ve gotten good at this flirting thing.”
“I am merely stating a fact based on what I observe.”
“Mhm, well, you’re not too bad yourself,” she said, and leaned against him, resting her head on his shoulder. The sun was getting brighter, revealing itself in a show of reds and golds on the horizon. For a few moments, they just sat there in comfortable silence. This silence felt better. Like he was simply processing and not hurting so much.
“Tech,” Phee eventually spoke, a question burning in her mind, “Do you… know why you might come to this spot every time you get scared like this?”
She felt Tech stiffen the slightest bit at her question, and it took him a while to answer, but she waited. She would always wait for him.
“I cannot be certain, but I believe it has something to do with how open it is here. I typically wake up feeling… trapped.”
“Maybe we should try camping out here for a night or two then, so you can sleep better,” she said, “If you’d like.”
“I… would like that,” he admitted, then, “You are very intelligent.”
She chuckled, “Thank you— that means a lot coming from the genius himself.”
Tech didn’t really respond, and suddenly he stiffened against her again, and then started to get up.
“Where are you—” she began to ask, but he was already up and walking quickly down closer to the water. She squinted in the sunlight to see what he was doing, and then he bent over and picked up something out of the shallow incoming waves. He came back over to her almost as quickly as he left, and held out a large seashell— pale blue in color— in his hands.
“Look, it’s a conch shell, scientifically known as Strombus gigas— it’s rare to find one of this size on shore.”
She laughed, gently taking it in her hands as he sat back down next to her, “You abandoned me just like that for a seashell?”
Tech suddenly looked stricken, “Oh, that was not—”
“I’m messing with you, Brown Eyes— it’s very cool. I didn’t even see it.”
She turned the shell over in her hands, looking it over, and then something tickled her hand from the opening. She turned it back over, and flinched a bit when she realized there was something alive coming out of the shell. It looked to be brown and slimy, and there were little round eyes peaking out.
“Whoa, what is that?” She said, and Tech audibly gasped and leaned closer to look at it.
“It’s a conch— a type of sea snail that lives in conch shells,” he said excitedly.
“Huh…” She looked at it carefully, then smirked, “The eyes kind of look like your goggles.”
“Really? I do not see such a resemblance,” Tech frowned a bit, adjusting his goggles in his usual habit.
“Don’t worry, I’d still love you if you were a snail.”
“Well, that would not be an ideal situation, nor do I see how that’s relevant to—”
“Don’t think too hard on it— it’s just a hypothetical,” she laughed, “Do you want Snail Tech back?”
“... Please do not call it that,” he said, and Phee laughed again, “But yes.” He took it from her, peering closely at the sea creature as it shifted in its shell. As he studied it, he quickly forgot about her jokes and began telling her some more random facts about it. She smiled and watched as he acted like himself again, in his element. As he did, the sun rose above the horizon, shining directly at them in all its glory, the colors fading away into bright gold and yellow.
“We should deposit it back in the water to preserve its life,” he suddenly said.
“Alright—then did you want to walk and see if we can find any more?” She suggested.
“Yes, that would be satisfactory,” he said, and she stood up as he took the conch shell back and returned it to the water. He rejoined her side and she took his hand as they began to walk down the length of the beach.
He didn’t really stay beside her much for the first part of the walk, often rushing into the shallow water without regard for his shoes or clothing getting wet as he spotted different creatures and shells. She listened to every fact he gave her, and observed everything he found and showed her. It was reassuring to see him like this, after everything else.
This was the life Tech had always deserved to live.
The sun was well above the horizon and it was beginning to be time they should head back, so they turned to walk back the way they came. Tech continued to look closely at the waves for anything interesting, but he mostly held her hand and walked beside her now, seeming content.
They started to walk away from the water and back toward town when he suddenly stopped, and still held her hand to stop her too. She turned to look at him.
“Wait a moment,” he released her hand and reached into his pocket and pulled out another conch shell, but this one was significantly smaller than the other one, and had a more vibrant blue and brown pattern, “This is for you.”
“Oh, thank you,” she took it, then squinted at the opening, “Is there a Snail Tech in this one too?”
He gave her a flat, unimpressed look, “That is not what they are called.”
“Well, they should be.”
Tech shook his head, “Regardless of the name, no, there is nothing living in this one. I am certain of it this time.”
“That’s good— wouldn’t want to accidentally kill one of your distant cousins,” she said with a grin, enjoying this all too much. His unamused expression morphed into a slight smile, and he huffed a small laugh.
“No, I suppose not,” he agreed, and his eyes seemed so full of life again, compared to earlier. Her heart felt happy to see him like this. She pocketed the shell and stepped closer to him, reaching up with one hand toward his face, wiping some sand from his cheek.
“Are you feeling better now?” She asked.
He nodded silently, and tilted his head a bit to lean into the touch. She brought her other hand up and rested both on his neck. He pulled her even closer with his left hand on her waist and his right hand around her, resting on her shoulder in a gentle embrace.
“Would you like a kiss, then?” She said with a smile.
“Yes,” he nearly whispered, leaning down, and she let her lips touch his, ever so gently. She closed her eyes as feelings of warmth and joy and love and him radiated throughout her body. The way he kissed her was so gentle and hesitant and never over the top, just intentional and meaningful and real. It was like a representation of how he treated her all the time in countless other ways.
She loved him so much.
After several seconds, he pulled back with a soft hum of contentment, and she laughed quietly and looked up into his eyes.
“I take it you liked that?”
“Did you not?” He asked, a smirk on his lips.
“Hm, I don’t know…” she said in a teasing tone.
“Perhaps we should try again to get an accurate reading,” he suggested, and she reached up and kissed him briefly on the cheek.
“I’m not opposed, but maybe later— it’s only a matter of time before one of your brothers or Omega comes looking for us.”
“That is a fair point,” he said, and she snickered.
“What, did Hunter lecture you really badly last time Omega caught us doing something like this?”
“Yes,” he said, “It was not ideal.”
As if on cue, there was a distant call from further up in town, likely by one of the houses overlooking the beach, “Tech! Phee! It’s time for breakfast!”
Phee shifted out of the embrace and Tech took her hand again, in preparation for Omega coming around the corner and seeing them. Though, if she was calling out, she probably already had. Oh, well.
As they started walking up the path toward the town again, Tech squeezed her hand.
“Thank you for this morning.”
“Anytime, Brown Eyes,” she beamed, squeezing his hand back.
Just then, Omega came running toward them from higher up on the path, grinning.
“You better hurry— Wrecker’s going to eat all the food.”
“Lead the way,” Phee said with a chuckle, “I’m sure you’re right.”
“What were you guys doing out here so early?” Omega asked as they started walking again.
“Oh, just an early morning walk,” Phee said.
“Did you see the sunrise?” Omega asked.
“Yes,” Tech adjusted his goggles and met Phee’s eyes, “We did.”
“Oh! How was it?”
“It was…” Tech was still staring at her, “Calming, and stunning.”
Phee ducked her head as her face heated up and suppressed a smile. She felt happy at the compliment and recognition, but also Omega was right there. What happened to the concern from a few minutes ago about preserving her innocence? Well, she’d get him back.
“We also found some of Tech’s distant relatives—”
“We did not.”
“What?”
“Yes, we found Snail Tech—”
Needless to say, all of Tech’s family thoroughly enjoyed that joke.