Chapter Text
A hard kick to the chest would do it. The breath in my lungs left me and I fall onto my back, gasping for air as my chest burned. My opponent, which happens to be one of the cell mates from across mine, rises his dagger for the killing blow. This is it. I'm going to die. I don't want to die. I want to live. I don't want to go. Not now.
I barely roll out of the way. The dagger scrapes across my right shoulder, leaving behind a giant, oozing gash. Damn. If I'm going to make it through this let's hope that doesn't get infected.
The blade of the dagger plunges into the dry earth beside me. I take the split second opportunity to get this guy off of me. I plant my feet in the dead center of his chest and push with all of my strength. He almost goes flying as he lands on his back and skids a foot or two. I pull the dagger out of the ground where my opponent left it and I hop to my feet.
The crowd gathered in the stands cheer. They disgust me. Cheering and placing bets on who lives and who dies. All they want to see in bloodshed. They can't summon up the courage to go to war and fight themselves, so they take other people outside of their empire to do it for them in the form of a cruel and sickening performance. They truly disgust me.
My foe weakly gets to his feet. He's more tired than I thought. I grip the dagger tightly and get into a defending stance. I have vowed to everyone in the coliseum and myself that I would not kill unless they are willing to give up their lives. Well, I'm still alive. I guess no one has the will to murder a 16-year-old boy.
The man looks at me with a sorrowful expression. He doesn't want to die, none of us do, but he doesn't want to kill me either. It's a heavy decision that weighs on all of our minds: Die or kill someone who never did us wrong.
The crowd is getting restless and the man makes up his mind. He runs to me. He doesn't sprint, he doesn't shield himself. He just runs. Open and venerable. He chose to sacrifice himself. A noble choice, but I don't want more blood on my hands than there already is.
I meet him halfway. Not only to end this, but to also give the crowd a show. If this looks like a real sacrifice, there will be hell to pay.
I drive the dagger through the side of his neck and yank it out. Blood sprays my face and chest as he falls to the ground. The crowd roars. I have won again. Many people have probably won generous amounts of money for my victory today.
And what do I win?
Another day to live in pain and sorrow. More time to live in fear of being forced to fight or perform demining acts of passion.
Another day to think about all the lives I have taken.
That's how the coliseum works, that's how it's always worked.
My wrists are bound in shackles once again as the guards walk me down to the cells. My wound is inspected and given a few stitches and a tourniquet. Then cold water is poured on me to rinse the fresher blood off. I show no emotion throughout this routine. No emotion, no more beatings than necessary.
I'm escorted into my cell. I sit down on the old wooden bench and the guards lock the cell door. I share my tiny cell with four others: Reiner, an extremely well built man. He's crushed people's heads in with just his hands. Bertholdt, the tallest person I have ever seen. I don't know what he does but he somehow pulls through. Eren, the most annoying guy I've ever met. He's a rare breed that almost lives for the kill, until he comes to his senses and realizes what he's done. And lastly, there's Levi. The complete opposite of Bertholdt, he's the shortest gladiator in the coliseum. But what he lacks in height, he makes up for in speed. He really is a worthy foe.
And then there's me. Just a young kid with a French name. The only thing I've ever done was shout out to the whole coliseum that I won't kill anyone because I was forced to. God, did I get one hell of a beating for that.
"So, another man falls at the hands of Jean."
I half-glare at Eren. Even though he's barely whispering, I could still hear him. If he talks too loud, we'll all be in for it.
And that's all that was said for the rest of the night. We all just sat and thought silently until sleep claimed us.
I haven't had a good dream in about two years. Nightmares haunt me. Because after all.....
.....dreams are for the free.