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When I wake up in the mornings, it often feels like drowning in a cold, dark pit. If only I'd looked up, the only way out seems to be at the top of the bottle. Being labeled the world's greatest actor is ironic. Everyone plays a role in their way, whether they realize it or not. You, me, your parents, and your friends are all actors in our shows.
My day started with a bad omen as I broke my favorite ring. Walking home from school, I can't help but feel powerless against the bullies. I should stand up to them, but being smart invites more trouble. The only person who truly knows me is my best friend, Celeste.
Celeste and I have been friends since we were almost too young to remember and frankly; she is more like my sister than anything.
We spend time together so often that people have asked if we were dating, we aren’t. I don’t understand why people would think that! I simply do not like her in that way.
Celeste is an amazing artist and can draw even better than leonardo da vinci, –though she won’t admit it. I still make sure to mention it so she knows that I believe her art is truly amazing.
Some people may see Celeste as quite grumpy or just tired; but I see the truth,
It’s not her that is the problem, it's people. No one has the capability to look past the surface but if they did, they would see a happy, silly girl like how I used to be….
Though with Celeste; despite us living in different neighborhoods, we still share a quiet walk home daily.
When I arrived home to an empty house, I changed out of my school uniform and started on my homework. My routine felt tiresome until I met Irene Kinley, a new friend who brought excitement and joy into my life. We met in school when she was the new student. She joined the class halfway through our first semester, I was chosen to show her around the school –which I did. We talked as I showed her around campus, it was exhilarating to say the least. Something inside me changed that day and since then we have been friends.
I am unsure despite Celeste suggesting that I have romantic feelings for her. The thought of exposing my true self to Irene terrifies me. The bullying has left me with trust issues and a fear of being seen in public, making it hard to open up to others. However, unlike anyone I've met, Irene somehow makes me feel safe and comfortable. Maybe that's why I feel drawn to her.
It's been a year, a year full of distress and satisfaction, and I've realized I have romantic feelings for Irene. We spend time together and I laugh, not fake, not forced real laughter. This moment made me realize that spending time with her makes me genuinely happy, similar to when I'm with Celeste and I am not saying I don’t laugh with Celeste. I laugh with celeste but when I do; I don’t get this fluttering feeling in my chest!
I've started to open up to Irene and act more like my true self. Surprisingly, she welcomed this change and encouraged me to be myself around her. This newfound comfort led to a wonderful day spent together, but my inner demons still haunt me. I know I need to protect Irene from them.
I'm torn because while I want to be with Irene, I fear that my troubles will put her in danger. I do not want to hurt her with my words because sometimes when I panic I lash out, it has happened only a small number of times but I still fear what I would do if given options against her when I am not in my right mind.
The nightmares persist, dragging me down into the murky waters of my emotions. But then, I wake up to a comforting warmth. It's Irene, bringing light into my life.
"Good morning, Tango," she says gracefully, "I made breakfast for us."
Her voice is like a soothing melody; for a moment, I forget about the darkness that often consumes me. As we sit down for breakfast, I can't help but feel a sense of warmth and comfort that I haven't felt in a long time. It's as if she can dispel the shadows that lurk within me.
After breakfast, I wash the dishes and Irene dries them.“Let’s go for a walk in the park,” Irene said.
The sun is shining, and the gentle breeze feels refreshing against my skin. We talk about everything and nothing, and I find myself opening up to her in a way I never thought possible. With her, I feel safe, understood, and accepted.
As we reach a quiet spot in the park, Irene turns to me and takes my hands in hers.
"Tango, there's something I've been wanting to tell you," she says, her eyes filled with warmth and sincerity. "I care about you a lot and want to be there for you, no matter what. You don't have to face your demons alone."
I feel a lump form in my throat as her words sink in. For so long, I've been carrying the weight of my struggles in silence, but now, here is someone who wants to share that burden with me. Tears fill my eyes as I realize that I don't have to hide behind a facade anymore.
"Irene, there's something I need to tell you too," I say, taking a deep breath. "I've been afraid to admit it, but I've come to realize that I have feelings for you. You make me feel like I can be myself, and I don't want to hide that part of me from you."
Irene's eyes widen in surprise, but then a soft smile spreads across her face. "Tango, I've had a feeling too, but I didn't want to rush things.I care about you deeply and want to be by your side, no matter what challenges come our way."
At that moment, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders. I never imagined that I could find someone who understands and accepts me for who I am. With Irene, I no longer feel trapped in the darkness of my own emotions.