Archive of Our Own ^beta

Dislaimers : Captain Harlock and his universe don't belong to me.

Notes : English isn't my first language. I apologize in advance for any mistakes who can remain. Let me know if that's the case.

« The place I need to return to is Arcadia, the place where my youth will always flow through these idyllic green fields. »

His heart was beating harder than usual. His hands were shaking slightly. He was somewhat impatient as well, which was not like him in normal times. He was precisely known for keeping his cool no matter what. But today, he was nervous. And happy. Finally, he was back. He was back where he truly belonged. And that was good, so good. He could finally let go. He could finally relax and release all the pressure he constantly carried on his shoulders. The truth was, he wasn't as strong as he wanted to make people believe. At heart, he was just a human, too. An indomitable human perhaps, but still a human with his weaknesses.

When the Arcadia finally landed on earth, he felt his impatience grow even stronger. He had to resist the temptation to run through the ship's corridors, and yet that's what he ended up doing after just a few steps. Then, when the Arcadia's ramp lowered, he felt like he was in slow motion. Why was it taking so long ? Why did it feel like that damn ramp would never fully open ? And since when was he ever this impatient anyway ? He didn't like being so vulnerable; it wasn't like him. Yet, he realised at the same time that he couldn't care less. There was no one to observe him anyway.

Finally, the ramp reached the ground. He immediately felt a gentle breeze come to caress his face marked by past confrontations. After all this time, he was finally back. After this long journey far away in the vast starry seas of the universe, he found himself once again on this land that had seen the birth of his ancestors. He was home. Where his place had always been. The place he once so ardently desired to return to, again and again. His home. Heiligenstadt. The Arcadia of his youth.

When he descended the ramp, he felt his legs tremble. He held his breath as his hands became clammy under his brown gloves. Before him, the vast green expanses appeared, similar to his memories. When exactly was the last time he had come back here ? Honestly, he couldn't remember. It was blurry in his memory. He remembered the war, the invasion of Earth, and all the misery it had caused. But the rest was blurry. It was as if these precious memories wanted to disappear from his memory. Why ? Why when he didn't want it ? Suddenly, he was afraid. A terrible thought overwhelmed his entire being. He had returned, and yet he feared being disappointed. He felt so vulnerable.

The first step, which touched the earthly ground, was the hardest. Then, he took another step forward, and so on. His walk was initially unsteady and slow, and he nearly tripped twice. But after a few steps, his gait became more assured, and soon he regained the confidence that was his own.

Around him, everything was nothing but beauty. The fields, the pastures, and the forest that stretched out in the distance had not changed. He could smell the sweet scent of nature, of flowers. The war had not ravaged this little corner of paradise. And he was deeply delighted about it.

Suddenly, she appeared among the flowers. Her hair floated slightly in the air, enough for him to notice. She was sitting on the ground with her back to him. He couldn't see her face, but he knew she was serene. He could also imagine her beautiful smile, her full lips, and her eyes with magnificent lashes. She was dressed in her traditional white dress. If she had been a flower, she would undoubtedly have been a white rose. Or a daisy because she had always been kind, among other things, and the yellow center could refer to her blonde hair.

Then, he stopped a few meters from where she was to contemplate her. And all of a sudden, the entire universe became beautiful, peaceful, and pure again. All his doubts flew away, one after the other. He also realized that he was no longer afraid and that his slight tremors had suddenly stopped. The beating of his heart, on the other hand, continued to pound in his chest. A small smile also adorned his usually serious face. Time seemed to stop, and nothing else mattered except her. It was as if suddenly the whole world had stopped turning to focus solely on her. Everything seemed to revolve around her. He could have stayed like that forever, watching her amidst the flowers. His magnificent rose.

- Harlock, you're there, she said suddenly in her so gentle voice.

He felt his entire body tremble at her voice. It had been so long, but never, never could he have forgotten her. She was etched in his heart for eternity, just like her. After all, she was a part of him. Without her, he was nothing. This place would never be the same without her. Heiligenstadt was so special because she was there. The world could not be beautiful without her rose.

How long did he stay there, watching her tirelessly ? He didn't know, but he didn't care. He could honestly stay there forever. His long and perilous journey was finally coming to an end. Never again would he leave. Never again would he leave her. It was here by her side that his place had been since the beginning. They were born in this place, and it was here that they would both die, together. It could not be otherwise. Heiligenstadt had always been their home, the place where they needed to live, the place where their youth would flow eternally through those idyllic green fields. It was their Arcadia. He was at home. Furthermore, she delicately touched the flower in front of her with the tips of her fingers.

- You came, she then said simply.

His smile widened as he felt his heart warm up. He eventually sat down beside her, without a sound. Only then did she raise her head and turn it toward him. He was left breathless. Had she ever been so beautiful ? Honestly, he didn't remember. Her face was so delicate, her cheeks were frail, her lips were full, her clear eyes were large and bright, and her long hair was, as always, just as blonde as the golden wheat fields. She was so radiant. He was dark, and his personality was the opposite of hers. Yet, they were two soulmates. Whatever happened, their paths were meant to cross. He had never doubted it.

- I’m here, he finally answered in a breath. I will always come back to you, to our Arcadia.

She smiled in turn. The world could officially become perfect again. He asked for nothing more than to see his rose smile. Her happiness was his. Her joy was his. Her laughter was his. He was only happy if she was. It was as simple as that.

Delicately, he took her free hand in his, interlacing his fingers with hers. This simple contact already brought him so much joy. But quickly, he asked for more. With his other hand, he gently caressed her cheek, lightly brushing it with the tips of his fingers. He felt her skin tingle at his touch.

- I missed you, my love, she murmured, closing her eyes.

- I missed you too.

- Never leave me again.

- I'll stay here, he assured her.

No, he won't leave again. He didn't want to. He no longer had any reason to leave now. No need to return to space and flee Earth. Deep down, he never doubted for a moment that the day would come when he could once again freely walk the soil of Earth, of Germany, of Heiligenstadt, of their Arcadia.

She finally opened her eyes, and then she took out a magnificent red rose from her dress, with sublime petals and a color so vibrant it seemed almost unreal, which she handed to him.

- Generally, it’s the men who offer women flowers, he remarks as he delicately takes the rose in his free hand while letting out a little laugh.

- Only, there are no flowers in space. I was keeping it especially for the day you would come back to me.

 - She is beautiful, but you are even more so.

She didn't answer, but her cheeks nevertheless took on some color as she smiled once more. He felt so good now. He fully realized how much he had missed her and how much he needed her. Life without her had no meaning.

She finally gently withdrew her hand from his as she turned completely toward him to look at him fully. This time, it was she who came to place her hand on his cheek. She gently caressed, as if she feared hurting him further, his long scar, starting from the bridge of his nose down to the bottom of his left cheek. Then, she placed her hand on his eye patch, looking sad. She had always felt guilty about this injury; he knew it very well. She felt responsible for the loss of his eye. Yet, she couldn't do anything about it. It was an accident, and for her, he would always be ready to risk his life.

- It's not your fault.

 - Yet it was while trying to save me that you lost your eye.

- And I don't regret it for a single moment. The most important thing is that you are now back home and safe and sound.

- I will never leave this place again, have no fear, my love.

With the tip of her index finger, she drew small circles all around his eyepatch before slowly moving down toward his mouth. She brushed his lips before withdrawing her hand, then slowly she brought her face closer to his. He let her do it before closing his eyes. Soon, he felt her lips, so soft, come to press against his in a movement so light it felt like a caress.

It didn't take much more for the two lovers to deepen the kiss. He wrapped both his arms around her back, drawing her body against his, while she wrapped both hers around his neck. It was a passionate and languid kiss. Their tongues met quickly before intertwining. They broke the kiss only to catch their breath, but without moving away from each other. They pressed their foreheads against each other while they kept their eyes closed for a moment longer.

- You know what ? I can't wait to show you the rose bed I had planted in our garden.

She then smiled against his lips, then slightly pulled her face away from his and looked at him longingly and lovingly. She seemed so happy at that moment that he felt his heart flutter. His love for her was so strong, so powerful, that nothing could come to hinder it.

- He must surely be splendid, I have no doubt about it.

- But before that, I would like to stay a little longer against you, here. I feel so good.

She gave him another radiant smile before resting her head against his shoulder. She then nestled her face in the crook of his neck, taking deep breaths of his scent to soak it in. He then wrapped his arms around her, gently holding her close, before leaning his head against hers. He buried his face in her magnificent blonde hair. They stayed like that, in each other's arms, for long minutes.

It was she who eventually detached herself, somewhat reluctantly, from him. She suddenly wore a mischievous look on her face. Then, without warning, she grabbed his cloak and unfastened it, letting out a small, amused laugh. Surprised, he let her do it anyway. She then grabbed it and tied it around her shoulders.

- You can keep it now. After all, you're the one who gave it to me. It's yours then.

 - It's tempting, she's more pleasant and less heavy than you think.

- That's true.

- I didn't want her to bother you.

They exchanged a knowing glance, then she gently pushed him back by placing her hands on his chest so that he lay down in the grass. Still wearing her mischievous little smile, she straddled him before letting out a small laugh. He didn't move an inch, content to look at her, touched and loving. His rose then took his hands in hers and contemplated them for a moment. They were much larger and bigger than hers. Then, she intertwined her fingers with his.

- I’m all yours, he said to her with a smile. What are you going to do with me ?

- I haven't decided yet, she replied, maintaining her little mischievous air.

Their gazes met once again, and for long seconds, they simply looked into each other's eyes, both unable to break that intense and romantic eye contact. Finally, she let go of his hands to push the rebellious strands of hair away from his face. She gazed longingly at his scar, which started from the bottom of his left cheek and extended up to the bridge of his nose. She then paused on his eyepatch and placed her hand on it once again before drawing small circles all around. Her gaze darkened.

- Don't be sad. I told you, it's not your fault.

- I know you don't want me to feel guilty. Yet, it’s for me that you lost your eye and risked your life. I can't forget it, my love. I’m incapable of it.

He said nothing, thus respecting his feelings. He understood perfectly. In his place, he would have felt just as guilty, honestly. She continued to draw small circles around his eyepatch for a moment before letting out a slight sigh. She eventually found her smile again before coming to lie down and snuggling against him, covering them both with the long black cloak she always wore. He immediately wrapped her in his arms. She nestled her head in the crook of his neck and closed her eyes.

They stayed like that, without moving, without speaking. He felt so good and so happy. He didn't need anything else and wanted to stay there with her forever.

Maya, I'm home, he thought.

[…]

He woke up with a start. Breathless and with his face drenched in sweat, he sat up in bed. Startled by this abrupt awakening, Tori-san let out a long croak beside him, waking up in turn. He turned his head towards the bird, and slowly he realised that he was in his quarters, in his bed, aboard the Arcadia. He had dreamed of Maya and it had seemed so real to him. Tears ran down his left cheek. It had been a few weeks since he had left Earth, banished. The pain of losing his beloved was still there. He never showed his sadness in front of others, but when he found himself alone, he let it all out. He missed Maya terribly, and he didn't know if he would ever truly overcome her death. But one thing was certain: he would never return to Heiligenstadt in their Arcadia. Not without her.