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The Missus and The Ex

Summary:

It's almost Christmas time again, and Traveller has a new problem. Someone from his past has returned, someone he was sure was erased from reality following The Event. Worst, she's a Chronomancer...and his ex-girlfriend. With the sneers of someone he once loved ringing in his ear, Traveller has to navigate a corporate Christmas party while trying to salvage the situation - if only he knew the danger that awaited him within the void.

Christmas 2025 story, way off-target and finished in January.

Notes:

I suck at writing stories on time. ;_;

Chapter 1: Blast From The Past

Chapter Text

Traveller couldn’t help but feel like he’d been in this situation far too many times, now.

 

As he stared blankly at his own ruined reflection in the shattered car window, strung twenty stories too many up the side of a building by fraying rope and rebar, he wondered how he could even get into this mess. It was just a routine job - it always was, to be fair - but it was supposed to be simple. Get into universe SA-38B, capture that idiot War Sonic (or Genesys, as he liked to be called, the edgy prick) and get out again. It never crossed his mind that the slimy living chemical burn had managed to get his hands on RyftCo tech, of all things. Their DO-C8 robotic tendril harness was a work of genius, for sure...but when attached to a violent bandit, it was a bit difficult to be impressed by it.

 

Traveller coughed up a glass shard or two as he slowly regained his senses within the destroyed vehicle he was suspended in. Somehow, it had been thrown this far up and slammed into a nearby building by those strong-as-hell tendrils. With him inside it, naturally. Every joint in Traveller’s body cried out in agony, and he was pretty sure he had caught another glass shard in his kidney. He studied the various cuts and gashes on his face that weren’t vaguely shielded by his scarf, as well as his shattered glasses. Groaning in pain, he slowly got to his knees in the upturned car, trying to avoid the now broken sunroof he had been dunked through. He crawled over to the side door and peeked out of the broken window; the view of the nighttime city this battle was taking place in was absurdly pretty, no doubt. He just wished it was seen on more solid foundations.

 

“Traveller!” cried out a familiar voice from slightly above him, “TRAVELLER! Are you okay?”

 

Traveller craned his neck upwards to see Ells, his blond-and-blue partner in crime, standing on the roof of a nearby shorter building, Blade of War in her hands. She looked incredibly concerned, given the circumstances. Traveller tried to flash something resembling a grin through his scarf, “I’m...okay, Ells. Don’t worry! I’ve survived worse.”

 

“Barely!” Blade said, being unnaturally shocked for who he was, “THAT was RyftCo tech?! And here I was, thinking Tallow wanted to partner up with them for the free dental care!”

 

“...Wait, Flintlock has to pay for dental?”

 

“Guys, not important!” Ells called out, facepalming in the process, “Traveller, it’s okay! We’re thinking of a way to get you outta there, and then I can heal you. Just keep hanging around!”

 

“I’m not exactly in a position to do otherwise, Ells!” an agitated Traveller growled, “Just hurry up, before that spiky green git comes back!”

 

“Too laaaaaaaaate!”

 

A sudden crash into the top (bottom?) of the vehicle sent it violently rocking in its restraints, causing Traveller to tumble around inside as well. Ells yelped in shock, looking up to see the perpetrator in question. High above her, clinging to the walls with his stolen technology, was indeed Genesys. He looked similar to most other Sonics; short yet lanky, blue fur and a mass of spikes growing out of the back of his head. And yet he looked so corrupted, with his blue fur splotched with green staining and his normally unblemished skin scarred with chemical burns. He wore no gloves, but his hands were bleached white in their stead, and he wore a tattered black raincoat with the hood up and over his head - with the spines poking through, naturally. What differed this time was the metal harness that was secured around his chest, with multiple, segmented mechanical tendrils that were currently burrowed into the buildings to keep the crazed hedgehog suspended.

 

“Jeez, how many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man?!” Blade growled, “This is just going to end the same way it always does!”

 

“Khahaha-” Genesys laughed raspily, leading into a quick and violent coughing fit, “Well, that’s where you’re wrong. Because THIS time, I have technology on my side! The same sort of thing I’d have if I didn’t lose that...fox, boy...” he quickly shook his head of the memories, “And now, I’m fast, strong AND durable! Consider me...undefeatable!”

 

“Subtle,” Traveller sighed under his breath.

 

 “It won’t work, Sonic!” Ells said defiantly, “Once we get the shutdown codes from RyftCo, all that’ll be to you is a giant weight on your chest.”

 

“Issat so?” Genesys grinned, “Well, guess I’ll just have to silence everyone who knows it, huh? And I know the PERFECT place to start!”

 

CRASH!

 

The car rocked violently as a few tendrils dislodged from the walls and began to strike the car with ruthless aggression. There was a cacophony of metal screeching and banging as more and more holes were ripped into the car. Traveller barely had space to move within the car as it was, so his twisting and turning could only do so much  He cried out in pain as a few tendrils pierced him in sensitive places. One hit his left arm, another his right leg, and the world dimmed significantly as he felt one puncture his lung. He lay limp at that last hit, the life slowly draining from his body. He could only hear Ells cry out in fear, and feel the debris and ropes holding him up slowly break and shift. Finally, they gave way. Traveller had a second of free-falling before he slammed into the roof of the car, knocking any wind out of him that was left.

 

He felt heavily pressed into the floor of the car, only able to slowly twist his head around to look out of the sunroof one final time. The cold, dark, unforgiving ground was very quickly rising up to meet him. It was only a matter of time before he would be a pancake. Oh well. He had a good run. Maybe Karsum would make another him. Maybe he’d be better. Maybe he’d be worse. It was too late to worry about that, now. He merely closed his eyes as darkness overtook him. waiting for the crash.

 

“CHRONOS CONTROL!!!”

 

But...there was no crash. Beyond that barely audible shout, there wasn’t anything at all. After a few seconds, Traveller felt...nothing. He didn’t even feel like he was dying. It was like everything had just stopped, all in a single second. Slowly, he creaked one eye open and looked around. Was he dead? Was he saved? The strangest sight met his eyes; time had indeed stopped! The car was hovering mere feet from above the ground, rocks and rain droplets were hanging frozen in mid-air. All was still and silent, with not even the blowing of wind to disturb things. It was so damn quiet that Traveller could swear he could hear molecules vibrate.

 

He looked up, and his eyes glazed in shock as the darkness was quick to overtake him once again.

 

“You know, we REALLY have to stop meeting like this, Markus...”

 

===

 

Traveller awoke with a gasp and a splutter, bolting upright and swinging out wildly at the phantoms in his dreams. It took him a hot minute to calm down, and take in his surroundings. Maybe he really WAS dead this time. Was this Heaven? Hell? Hmm...how would a Hell even compare to the darkest pits of the D’Aether, anyway? He shook the bleary vision and stinging pangs from his head, and tried his best to look around. He was still in the city, at least. He was sitting only mere yards away from the car he was trapped in - nothing more now than a pile of crumpled scrap and shattered glass, unrecognisable from the vehicle it had once been.

 

Looking down, he noticed that he felt no pain, nor did he feel like he was dying anymore. He checked the side of his torso that had been given a new hole to breathe out and felt nothing. It was like it never happened. He was even clean of blood and debris, like he had never gotten into a fight.

 

Traveller’s breathing became erratic as his mind began to race. This wasn’t right? No-one had the power to stop and even REVERSE time to this extent. Not anymore, at least. Not since...

 

“TRAVELLER!” came a cry from behind him. It was Ells. Traveller groaned as he got to his feet - healed he was, but everything still ached like nothing else on Earth. He turned to look at Ells run towards him, panicked relief visible on her face and arms outstretched. She nearly tackled the man to the ground with the sheer force that she crashed into him, hugging him with all her strength, “Jesus Christ I genuinely thought I lost you I never thought I-”

 

“Ells, ELLS!” Traveller shouted, snapping Ells out of her panic. She looked up at him, tears in her eyes, and he sighed, “It’s alright. I’m...okay now. SOMEHOW. I’m not even sure what happened back there.”

 

“Y...you’re telling me,” Ells cleared her throat awkwardly, releasing Traveller from her embrace, “I saw you fall, I-I thought you were a goner! And then...i-it was like time just sort of snapped forward a few seconds. The car crashed into the ground, but I didn’t see any blood! Genesys cried out in confusion, and then all the limbs on his mech just went POOF! Like they never existed!”

 

“What the heck happened?” Blade said as Ells gingerly gave him back to Traveller, “There ain’t a guy alive we know who can pull a stunt like that.”

 

“There was ever only one person I ever knew who could do any of that,” Traveller shook his head, “And she just...doesn’t exist anymore.”

 

“Well if that’s the case, this was still pretty helpful,” came yet another voice from off in the short distance. Sure enough, it was Tallow, holding a battered and restrained Genesys with his arms behind his back. Tallow looked over their prize, “If nothing else, it made capturing this little shit a breeze for once.”

 

The heavily beaten Genesys spat out a tooth and growled, “This ain’t over, toots. Once I’m back in shape, I’ll run the lot of you into the ground!!!”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Tallow grumbled, giving him a heavy dope slap to the back of the head, “Boys, get him back to his cell. And lock it up EXTRA tight this time. Six. Locks.”

 

“Yes, Captain!” a FLINTLOCK soldier saluted, before grabbing Genesys and marching him towards the awaiting portal, “Come on, Spiky. Maybe next time.”

 

“THIS ISN’T THE END, RUNTS!” Genesys screamed in defiance, before he was shoved roughly into the portal. And then, blissfully, silence.

 

Traveller sighed, arching backwards a bit to crack his back a bit, then turned to Tallow, “You took your fucking time.”

 

“Well EXCUSE me,” Tallow said back, “I was a little busy dealing with the collateral that green pissant left in his wake. No idea how he got his hands on RyftCo tech...rest assured, I’ll be working with Director Tubeman to make sure it never happens again. As for YOU...” Tallow arched forward with a more quizzical look on their face, “How’d you do that?”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“I mean, everyone saw that car drop to the floor with you in it,” Tallow shrugged, “We all thought you were a goner, for better or for worse. Just a pancake on the floor in that crumpled scrap. Then, all of a goddamn sudden, you’re out here alive and well, and that spiky idiot is lying on the floor looking like he took a sledgehammer to the face. Since when did you Warmongers know how to TIME TRAVEL?!”

 

“HA! Don’t make me laugh, doll,” Blade said, “They were powerful back in my day, but not THAT powerful. Nah, this is the work of someone else.”

 

“But WHO?” Tallow asked, “Who the hell is powerful enough to do that?!”

 

“Well...I’d say an old friend, but we’re not friends...”

 

Another voice? But this one was different. Weird high-pitched, but trying to be deep in tone. Had a very specific cadence, not unlike how people in ba anime dubs spoke. Reality itself seemed to contort in ways that the D’Aether could only dream of doing before, with a warping howl, a figure appeared before the group. Traveller looked upon this new person, and his eyes lit up as his heart sank. It was a woman, around his age if not older. Tall, slim, blond hair in a ponytail not unlike Ells’, but far neater and without a hat. She wore an anachronistic set of clothing - a wildly fancy Victorian-era shirt with a velvet waistcoat, a pocketwatch nestled in the breast pocked on the left side. Dress trousers and fancy shoes, and even a monocle on the left side of her face. In her hands was a bronze staff, far cleaner than Karsum’s scrap trident, festooned with engravings, a fancy pommel at one end and another stopwatch secured in place at the other. And her eyes, fierce and a deep, dark blue that sparkled in the sunlight. If only her expression was more than a bored sneer.

 

Traveller felt every facet of his being drop like a stone, “Oh God...”

 

“Traveller?” Ells asked cautiously, “D-Do you...know this girl?”

 

“That...” Traveller said hollowly, “Is Amelia. Amelia Roseanne. Chronomancer...a-and, my ex.”

 

Amelia’s frown turned into a sarcastic smile, “Hello, Markus”

 

===

 

Traveller wasn’t sure when he passed out again between that line and getting back to FLINTLOCK HQ. Even when fully healed of his injuries, he still felt weak. Maybe it was just the shock of all that happening so damn quickly, who could say. His head was still pounding and his mouth was dry as sandpaper when he finally came to within the HQ itself. It wasn’t one of the barracks, thankfully, but one of the hospital wings instead. Empty, mercifully. He looked down at himself; still had all his limbs, and his clothes were pristine. So, maybe all that was a dream? He hoped so. Very few things survived what they called The Event. And he was hoping that they wouldn’t, considering what it would mean for the...sacrifices they made.

 

Groaning with effort, he threw himself off the bed and to his feet, ambling out of the medical wing. He stepped out into the corridor, looking to the left and then to the right. Not that it really mattered, every corridor in this rancid place looked exactly the same anyway. Bleached white walls and floors, seats on the sides for those waiting, posters on the wall, the ever-irritating hum of the ceiling lights. It almost felt what the kids called “liminal”. Traveller preferred a different word; “crap”

 

He wandered around the complex for a while, ambling from corridor to corridor, greeting FLINTLOCK grunts whenever he saw them. He could’ve really done with a map or something. He had no idea where he was, or where to go for that matter. The best thing to do, he thought, would be to find the briefing room. If nothing else, he’d probably find Tallow in there, ready to give him another bollocking as they were wont to do.

 

Finally, with enough aimless travelling, he came across a map. Thankfully, he wasn’t even that far from the briefing room by this point. Which was oddly fortunate. With a twist, he walked down the corridor, took the right, a left, then another right and was before the door frame before he knew it. The sign on the front said the room was occupied. Not that Traveller really cared. He walked over to the window and peered through the crack not obscured by the curtain. Indeed, Tallow was in there, alongside Ells and his “good” counterpart, Codename: WANDER. They were all looking up at the screen on the far wall, which showed a figure of some sort on the screen - whatever it truly was, Traveller couldn’t make out from here. Sighing, he walked back up to the door, gave the handle a twist and barged inside.

 

He cleared his throat, “Evening, what did I miss?”

 

“Goddamnit, the door SAID this room was...” Tallow growled as they turned around, only for their rage to falter as they looked upon said intruder, “Oh, it’s you. Intrusive as always...” they turned back to the screen, “Sorry for this, Director. He’s a...problem, agent. Kind of just like this.”

 

“Oh, don’t worry, Captain. I have my fair share of problem agents, myself. Two Tropo-tier agents from the Earth Division come to mind..." 

 

Traveller, jumping at the new, husky voice, looked towards the screen. On show, from about waist height, was a strange being. A short, stocky woman, but with a near-featureless TV for a head, complete with those weird phantom spirals TVs tend to have for eyes.

 

Wander jumped up from his own seat, “Oh hey, Traveller! Forgot to mention, we’re having a little discussion with another organisation. This is RyftCo Director Cathy Tubeman.”

 

Traveller moved his hand up in a vague wave, “Evening. Or, what passes for it in this place.”

 

Tubeman’s face slowly approached the screen, to the point that she and the screen were almost one, “So, you’re the travelling man that everyone keeps mentioning. The good captain has told me quite a bit about you...”

 

“If they said anything about the cannibalism, that is malicious slander and we will NOT stand for it!” Blade called out, chuckling under his breath, “Besides, turns out humans go great with mint sau-ow!”

 

Traveller responded by rolling his eyes and giving Blade a good thump within his holster to shut him up, “Look, whatever Tallow has told you about me, there is a very, very high chance that it’s nonsense. They and I don’t really see eye to eye on a lot of things.”

 

“Oh?” Tubeman asked, “Well what about your ‘ex’, then?”

 

“Ex?” Traveller’s face dropped again, looking over to the side of the room, hidden in shadow. Sure enough, emerging from the darkness and chuckling, was Amelia. Same odd dress code, same blond hair and ponytail, same monocle and brass staff  and everything. Traveller sighed in some form of defeat, “Ahh, fuck. Wasn’t a dream.”

 

“Not really, no,” was Amelia’s flippant reply. She arched forward, arms crossed, “I betcha wondering exactly WHY I’m here. Or rather, HOW I’m here.”

 

“Considering you shouldn’t exist anymore, JUST A BIT,” Traveller spat back.

 

“You’re not supposed to exist either, you know...” Amelia sighed, “And yet, here you are. The Warrior. The War Master. The randy, needle-dicked pile of shit.”

 

Traveller could just feel the venom spat in his face at that last jab. He could feel his hands ball up into fists, and yet tears pricked his eyes. He stood there, vibrating like a damaged diesel engine, angry and saddened all at the same time. But...why?

 

“HEY!” Ells yelled, stomping over to the small group and pushing Traveller to the side. She stared up at the taller Amelia, starring daggers into her eyes, “Whatever he was like when you knew him, he’s changed! Give him a chance!”

 

"Oh! You must be his newest... companion." Amelia said, barely covering the contempt in her voice with a saccharine smile. She quickly scanned Ells from head to toe. "It's nice to see he's loosened his standards, at the very least!"

 

"What is THAT supposed to mean!?" Ells spit out, looking like she's 1 millisecond away from throwing hands.

 

“Good lord, it’s a dream come true!” Tallow cracked the first genuine smile of perhaps their life, “Here I was, having a headache and dealing with the same ol', and then my least favourite person of all time walks in having a TERRIBLE time sandwiched between the missus and the ex! HA! Shit, it must be Christmas. I need to buy a lottery ticket.”

 

“Not now, Tallow!” Wander growled, storming between the two girls and forcing them at arm’s length on either side, “Alright, that is ENOUGH, you two! We can sort this while being civil human...ish, beings,” he sighed, before turning to the screen, “Forgive me, Director. I think we may need to do this another time.”

 

“Oh no, don’t worry, I’m quite enjoying this little display,” Tubeman said with barely a change in tone, “And, come to think about it, it IS Christmas, isn’t it? Or, it will be soon enough. If you could remove these two from the room, Mr Wander, I would like to offer you a...friendly get-together.”