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The chosen boardroom today smelled faintly of lemon polish, Wade's mind noticed as he picked at his nails, while Jefferson droned on about some hit. Normally, they went for the pice scented cleaner, but they must have run out.
"Wilson, you listening?"
Wade refrained from rolling his eyes. "Yeah, the hit is some weird recluse guy up in the woods, fighting bears and chopping logs. Very manly," Wade rattled off, noticing the vein in Jefferson's head popping up to say hello, like it did a lot when Wade talked. Or when he was fighting at home with his wife. Wade had always thought soulmates were supposed to understand each other. So fighting with your soulmate seemed odd to him.
"It's not just 'some hit'. This is the most dangerous target we've had." Jefferson turns and points a remote at the white screen behind him. A photo of some hot guy with mutton chops and a scowl etched on his face popped up on the screen, piquing Wade's interest, but not enough to listen to what Jefferson was saying.
"Logan Howlett," Jefferson continued. "Is a highly dangerous mutant. Regenerative abilities-" Wade's ears definitely perked up at that. "And adamantium claws in each forearm." He turns back to look at Wade. "They make a hot knife slicing through butter look like child's play. He was an asset of Weapon X until he broke free and has been on the run ever since. He's too much of a liability to allow to keep roaming. We need to take him out by any means necessary."
"And that's where I come in, right? Your very own unkillable murder kitten?" Wade asked, ignoring Jefferson's nose wrinkle at the nickname Wade had been workshopping.
"Yes." Jefferson slid a manila envelope across the table to Wade. "Everything you need is in there. It's recon for the first few days. We found where he lives. We need to know his patterns before you can complete the job. He's military trained and has ani-"
"Yeah, okay. Thanks for the story, Gramps. I know all I need to know. Recon, in, out, shake his brains about. Done." Wade stood up and started walking to the door.
"Wilson, wait! You didn't hear the whole-"
"I'm going through a tunnel now kkhhhsssshh and can't hear you. 'Kay, bye!" He called over his shoulder as he left. He walked down the corridors and past the water cooler, then turned left and made a beeline for the locker room. It was empty in there, besides Trevor Harris, who was checking his gun. Wade never liked that asshole.
Harris looked up when Wade entered and smirked.
"Hey, Wilson. Heard about the bang up job you did on the Parson file."
Of course, that asshole would have to bring up the one time that Wade slipped up on a mission and compromised it.
"Fuck off, Harris. Isn't there spiteful divorcees for you to go shoot at?" Wade sniped back. He made sure his locker door clanged and let out an awful noise, a smug smile tugging his mouth when he saw in his mirror on the door that Harris winced. Wade tuned him and the rest of the empty room out and focused on choosing his gear.
Harris had been a smug bastard before, but he was unbearable now that he had found his soulmate in a bar a few months ago, after stumbling into each other. And he made sure to remind Wade that he was alone and soulmateless every chance he got. Wade was an ally, and he was sure Harris's soulmate was a lovely guy. But he wouldn't wish Harris on his worst enemy.
He pulled the small duffel bag from the bottom of the locker and started shoving things in. His binoculars, his favourite gun, his knuckle dusters if it came to hand to hand combat, although he rarely used them. He did vaguely wonder how he was going to kill a target who regenerated, but he was sure that if he just kept attacking, he could override the healing and kill him. And be back in time for dinner and the next rerun of Golden Girls. Alone.
He shoved a few more things he'd need into the bag and then closed his locker again before hoisting the bag on his shoulder and walking out.
"Don't fuck this one up!" Harris shouted after him. Wade responded by flipping the bird over his shoulder.
Fucking asshole.
~~
Wade got dropped off in the middle of bum fuck nowhere in Canada. It should have felt like home sweet home, but luck wasn't on Wade's side. It was snowing, and his suit wasn't thermal, and he'd left his long johns at home.
"Couldn't have given me a fucking weather warnings, assholes," Wade muttered as he shifted to get more comfortable on the snowy bank he was lying on, binoculars out and pointed at the small, falling apart cabin. And he was currently watching its inhabitant chop wood.
What they failed to mention during the briefing was how gorgeous the target was in person rather than in the photos. It didn't do him justice, and Wade was only a man. He couldn't help drooling over those muscles as they rhythmically swung an axe over and over again as he was splitting logs.
"Oh, to be a piece of wood right now. I'd let him split-" Wade froze as his target froze and looked to his left. Then, to his right. Wade swore he saw his nose twitching.
"What is it, Lassie? Did Timmy fall down the well?" Wade whispered, twisting the binoculars to zoom in. The target turned, and Wade's breath hitched, ducking just as the target seemed to look right at him. Luckily, Wade was semi prepared and had on his white snow coat, so he blended into the background. The target's eyes darted all over the forest where Wade was. Wade held his breath. That nose was twitching again. It occurred to him that maybe he should have listened to the whole docket before leaving.
Did this guy have super smell? Super hearing? Was he about to come charging over the hill and stick his pretty, shiny blades into Wade's skull?
For a few tense moments, Wade wondered if the mission was compromised and he'd have to listen to Harris' smug grin and taunting, as the great Wade Wilson failed another mission. But, to Wade's relief, the target's shoulders relaxed, and he dropped the axe in favour of picking up the wood before entering the cabin.
"Phew, that was a close one," Wade mumbled to himself. He gathered his stuff, got up to make the trek back to the tent he'd been staying in, completely missing the dark, intense eyes staring at him from behind a curtain.
~~
It had been a few days now. He'd sent all the intel he'd gathered back to HQ.
The guy was kind of boring if you asked Wade. He did the same thing day in, day out. Got up, had breakfast, went for a run no matter the weather. Then he'd come back and maybe split some logs, tending to the little garden he had in the back, then he would do DIY and fix things around the cabin. Wade had gotten a good laugh the other day when the target nearly slipped off the ladder and had to cling to the drainpipe.
Other than that exciting moment, nothing had happened until now.
He'd been given the go-ahead to take out the target.
Wade decided to wait for the cover of night to make his move. He stayed hidden in the snowy banks until he saw the light turn off in the window. He gave it half an hour before he moved, to make sure that his target was asleep. The door barely made a squeak as he opened it and snuck in.
He had a vague idea of the layout after his recon, so moving through the cabin in the dark was no problem for him. He was like a shadow as he swiftly made his way through the living room, past the kitchen and down the small hall leading to the bedroom with his target in. The door was open, like an invitation.
"What psycho sleeps with the bedroom door open?" Wade thought in passing, before he focused and raised his gun as he stepped lightly into the room and crept towards the bed.
The room was dimly lit by moonlight, which peeked through the gap in the curtain to highlight the shape under the covers on the bed, completely unaware of Wade's presence and his impending doom. Like taking candy from a baby. Wade stepped closer, aiming the gun.
His finger pulled the trigger, and the shot went off. It hit its target. Only the target didn't get the memo that he was supposed to die. There was an almighty roar, and the guy in the bed was leaping at him, and Wade felt like he had been punched in the chest.
"Well, this changes things," he gargled, as blood spurted from his mouth. He grunted as the claws were retracted from his chest with a wet schlck. He stumbled back, the pain spreading at the same time his skin was knitting itself back together. Wade didn't have a chance to get his bearings as his target was coming at him again.
In a split second decision, he pulled his swords from behind his back to block the attack, the metal on metal screech ringing loud in the small space. He got a good look at the sharp adamantium claws before his target snarled right in his face, pushing back, sending Wade skidding across the floor. He shook it off quickly and bounced back up as he heard the snikt of the blades retreating into the guy's forearms.
"Okay, hard way it is," Wade said, rolling his shoulder before blocking the fist coming at his face with his forearm. Wade took advantage of the guy leaving himself open and gave a few good punches to the ribs. The guy backed off, his arm wrapped around his ribs, but was soon standing up with no problem.
"What do you want, motherfucker?" The guy growled.
"Preferably, your head on a platter and the million dollar bounty on you in my pocket. It's nothing personal. You understand," Wade replied, before rushing forward, aiming his fist for the guy's face. The guy ducked at the last minute, sending Wade's fist into the wooden wall. He hissed, whirling around to immediately duck as claws whistled above his head, gouging into the wall where his head was. Wade took this chance to tackle the guy, sending both of them to the floor with a yell.
The guy tried to buck Wade off him, but Wade trapped the guy's legs so he was straddling him.
"Can you hold still so I can kill you? I have a reputation to uphold," Wade grunted, and the guy punched him in the face.
"Fuck you," the guy spat, fury in his eyes. His very pretty hazel eyes, that were burning with anger. But Wade didn't have time to be distracted. He pulled out his trusty baby knife and brought it down to the guy's chest, but the guy caught his hands at the last minute. Wade pushed harder, struggling with effort.
"Will you just—" Wade gritted through his teeth, yelling out as the guy stabbed him in the shoulder with his claws. He was claiming hazard pay for this fucker, because that shit hurt. Blood dripped onto the guy's white tank top like a biohazardous Jackson Pollock. Wade only faintly registered the scorch mark of where he had shot the guy, only now it was completely healed.
Wade's hand was slipping more than he would like. The guy got a better grip of Wade's glove, and the velcro holding it on creaked. Wade adjusted his position, trying to push down harder. The guy somehow got a grip under the glove and pulled back, trying to use it to throw the knife off balance, but he ended up taking the entire glove off while still holding Wade's other hand, pissing Wade off.
"You—" he swung wildly at the guy's face, not caring about the knife anymore. The guy caught his fist easily.
A supernova exploded behind Wade's eyes. He heard a heartbeat in his ears, going double time. Like another person's was beating alongside his, making him warm all over, starting from where he was connected to the guy and tingling all the way down to his toes.
His soulmate.
He looked down and saw a similarly shocked look on the guy's face. Wade blinked slowly.
"Well, shit."