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ALTERNATE *SOLARBALLS (2022)* UNIVERSE 1456TRIVIA6541
THURSDAY, 3 JANUARY 2008AZ:
The K1.5III Fe-0.5 orange giant cleared his throat and enlisted hundreds of solitary members, celestial systems, plus rogue objects from across the galaxy. He also secretly contacted an extragalactic system for adjudication purposes. They were scheduled to arrive in ten minutes.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: I understand it’s almost been three months since the arrest…but now it’s time.
The outermost TRAPPIST-1 planet gazed up at him.
[TRAPPIST-1H🌎🚺]: For what?
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: To determine the Rogue Planet Kingdom’s fate.
[TRAPPIST-1E🌎🚺]: (snorting) Good luck with that. Aren’t they already serving probation?
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (slow nod) Yes, but there is a way to reduce their sentence.
[TRAPPIST-1C🌎🚺]: (exclaiming) Why the fuck would you want to reduce it? They deserve what they got!
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (humming) Yes, but perhaps this could be a learning experience for all of them. Think of it as a form of rehabilitation.
The innermost TRAPPIST-1 planets rolled their eyes.
[TRAPPIST-1B🌎🚺]: Oh yeah, that’ll solve everything.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: Patience, young planet.
[TRAPPIST-1C🌎🚺]: We’re older than you.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: 300 million years isn’t much of a difference.
[TRAPPIST-1E🌎🚺]: (mild shrug) If you say so.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (announcing) Alright everyone, gather ‘round.
They obeyed his instructions.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (brief pause) As you all know—the Rogue Planet Kingdom has been disbanded due to illegal endeavors.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: (grumpily) You’re talking to us like we’re not here.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (sternly) Silence! I didn’t assemble you to feed your fragile ego.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: (growling) Now listen here, savage freak! Just because you’re a star —
A yellow-white F9V star hovered forward, anger seeping through her core.
[KEPLER-90☀️🚺]: (humorless laugh) I’m sorry—what did you say?
Dozens of stars and their companions gasped out loud, glaring daggers at the bigoted sub-brown dwarf. His siblings were especially disappointed and frankly disgusted by his behavior.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: (flustered) Th-That’s not what I said!
[KEPLER-90☀️🚺]: You just did.
A red M4V star clenched his teeth.
[BARNARD☀️🚹]: Yeah, might as well fess up, you fucking racist.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: Whatever! I’m still right.
A white A6V star approached her younger sibling, tears glistening in her eyes.
[BETA PICTORIS☀️🚺]: What happened to you, PSO? You weren’t like this before.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: Urgh! Why are you here? I thought I disowned you guys!
[BETA PICTORIS☀️🚺]: (heartbroken) You’re not the little brother I once knew…
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: (invading her personal space) I’m not your brother!!
A white A7V star planted herself between them.
[HD 172555☀️🚺]: (warningly) Hey! Back off!
PSO huffed indignantly, but did as he was told.
[51 ERIDANI A☀️🚺]: (whispering) We could always disown him back.
[BETA PICTORIS☀️🚺]: But —
[51 ERIDANI A☀️🚺]: Forget him—he’s a lost cause. We don’t need to tolerate his bullshit anymore.
Beta Pictoris’ lips quivered as she shut her eyes for a moment, a tear slipping down her cheek.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: PSO! Your transgressions have crossed a line.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: What? It’s free speech! I can say whatever I want!
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: Free speech is not hate speech. From now on, you’ll be silent unless you’re required to respond.
[PSO J318.5-22🟤🚹]: That’s bullshit! I have a right to…! Y-You can’t just —
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (furiously) One more word and you’ll be thrown out of the galaxy! Now BE SILENT!
A navy blue ice giant and a dwarf planet candidate exchanged satisfied glances.
[PLANET X🪐🚹]: Good thing his gravitational powers were confiscated.
[SEDNA🔘🚺]: Yep.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (calming down) They should be here any moment…
[SIMP0136🟤🚺]: (frowning) Who’s they?
Suddenly, four brown dwarfs and their twenty-two planets arrived at the scene, chatting amongst themselves during the journey. They performed faster-than-light travel to save time, but screeched to a halt once they entered the Rogue Planet Kingdom’s former territory. Components AB had American accents, Component C spoke with a Stockport-Manchester English accent, and Component D was Glaswegian Scottish.
Their single-orbiting planets shared the same accents as their host brown dwarfs, while the other planets (circumbinary-triple-quadruple) spoke with either Dublin Irish or Inverness Scottish accents. Overall, the system’s brown dwarfs were male while their planets were female. All four brown dwarfs were currently spectral type T, and planetary compositions did NOT include gas giants (maximum mass = ice giants).
All twenty-six members were part of the Hobbit-1 System originating from the Triangulum Galaxy’s outer stellar disk, about 14 kiloparsecs from the galactic center. Their system provided long-term stability and a significant planet population due to nearly 0% of gravitational perturbations (nearby stars = 5000+ astronomical units away) plus a lack of asteroid belts.
The system was born in a metal-rich (+0.12 dex) molecular cloud 6.66 billion years ago, consistent with late-epoch star formation in M33. Brown dwarfs Frodo (Hobbit-1A) and Samwise (Hobbit-1B) were a binary pair 0.34 AU apart (spectral types T7V-T8V), though Frodo was more massive compared to Samwise (48 versus 44 Jupiters). Their radii were also 0.91 and 0.89 Jupiters respectively.
Their collective orbital period-speed of 1.25 years and 29 km/s around their barycenter, and Frodo was the oldest quadruplet followed by Samwise (second-oldest). He often teased his binary brother over their rotational periods-speeds, claiming Frodo spun faster (39 hours at 33 km/s) which made Samwise a slow-poke in comparison (42 hours at 30 km/s).
Their two younger quadruplet brothers didn’t have binary partners of their own: Meriadoc (Hobbit-1C) and Peregrin (Hobbit-1D), often nicknamed Merry and Pippin. Meriadoc orbited the binary pair 6.2 AU away while Peregrin was the outermost component with a distance of 42 AU from ABC. Merry’s orbital period-speed was 51 years at 9.5 km/s, whereas Pippin’s was 1150 years at 3.1 km/s.
Components C and D were spectral types T8.5V and T9V respectively. Meriadoc’s rotational period-speed was 48 hours at 25 km/s while Peregrin’s was 56 hours at 19 km/s. Merry and Pippin were 39 and 34 Jupiter masses, plus 0.87 and 0.85 Jupiter radii. All four brown dwarfs contained molecular hydrogen, helium, and methane in their atmospheres. Frodo and Pippin also had water vapor, whereas Samwise and Merry had ammonia.
In terms of planets—three orbited A (two terrestrials + one hycean), three orbited B (one terrestrial, one hycean, + one mini-ice giant), three circumbinaries orbited AB (one hycean + two ice giants), four orbited C (two terrestrials, one hycean, + one ice giant), three circumtriples orbited ABC (one hycean + two ice giants), four orbited D (two terrestrials, one hycean, + one ice giant), and two circumquadruple ice giants orbited ABCD.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: (pursed lips) You all came—that’s good.
[OGLE-2016-BLG-1928🌎🚹]: (amazed) Whoa! There’s more brown dwarfs?
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: They exist everywhere across the universe—all kinds of celestial objects.
[OGLE-2016-BLG-1928🌎🚹]: Cool!
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: Everyone, I’d like you to meet these twenty-two ladies and four gentlemen—Frodo, Samwise, Meriadoc, Peregrin, and their lovely planets.
[EARTH🌎🚹]: (mouth agape) Wait, are they really named after…?
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: Yes. (facing brown dwarfs) Why don’t you four take it from here?
[FRODO🟤🚹]: (casually) No problem.
After introducing themselves plus summarizing their physical and orbital characteristics, it was time to establish rules and guidelines.
[FRODO🟤🚹]: Sam?
[SAMWISE🟤🚹]: Sure.
He stepped forward.
[SAMWISE🟤🚹]: Rule #1—violence, including hate speech, is prohibited.
Pure embarrassment and humiliation sunk into PSO’s core.
[SAMWISE🟤🚹]: Rule #2—you can’t search the web for answers. That’s cheating.
[WISE 0855-0714🟤🚹]: (sighing) Fair enough.
[SAMWISE🟤🚹]: Rule #3—teammates can only help you if it’s a team-based round…and I think that’s it.
[ARCTURUS🌟🚹]: Any questions?
Nobody dared to open their mouths.
[SAMWISE🟤🚹]: Then let’s begin. Merry, wanna take this one?
[MERIADOC🟤🚹]: Sure. (hovering forward) You guys will be divided into two teams—former Rogue Planet Kingdom and those against it. Whoever breaks the rules will be eliminated from the challenges.
[OTS 44🟤🚺]: (tentatively) What do you mean eliminate?
[PLANET X🪐🚹]: (sharply) It means you’re out of the game, not destroyed.
His tone caused her to flinch for a split second.
[SIMP0136🟤🚺]: (huffing) We knew that.
[PLANET X🪐🚹]: (muttering) Sure you did…it’s in your wheelhouse.
[SIMP0136🟤🚺]: (offended scoff) Hey! We never —
[PLANET X🪐🚹]: (forced smile) Please continue, Mister Meriadoc. Sorry for the interruption.
[MERIADOC🟤🚹]: Thanks, but I’ll let Pippin take this one. Ready when you are, brother.
The youngest quadruplet moved forward with a genuine smile.
[PEREGRIN🟤🚹]: Ah yes, the first round…this should be an easy one.
[WISE 0855-0714🟤🚹]: Define easy.
[FRODO🟤🚹]: Patience WISE, we’ll get there.
[PEREGRIN🟤🚹]: Anyway…this round will be knowledge of the Solar System.
[WISE 0855-0714🟤🚹]: Why them?
[FRODO🟤🚹]: (chuckling) Earth, obviously. Dude has intelligent life on his surface.
[EARTH🌎🚹]: (embarrassed blush) Well uh…y-yeah.
[PEREGRIN🟤🚹]: (brows lifted) So…shall we begin?