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a loving feeling

Summary:

This year was his 17th birthday.

After October, he had one year left to prove himself to everyone.

Xingqiu hoped he wouldn’t make it to 18. He always had.

But he was too much of a coward to do anything about it.

(or: a xingyun fic because this fandom needs more and I will die on this hill)

Notes:

to those of you who know me, I swear I'll update the scarabedo fic y'all I'm just getting sidetracked

and to those who don't! hELO

this fic takes a lot of inspo from one I read earlier named 'i hope you'll still love me when i'm gone' by anomliesofvhs. I don't intend to take the entire plot but like, a few ideas that are prominent in most xingyun fics! also there were these xingyunrannett ones I read a while back that also played a big role in my ideas for this heehhehehehehehhehehehehehhe

boy oh boy do I love yaoi!!!!

this is the intro btw so eheheh

buh bye and enjoy!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: prologue???

Chapter Text

 

The sun had already set below the horizon, the last few rays of light reflecting off the coloured glass windows in the library. The bulb in the light above was broken, and occasionally flickered as it shone down upon the two boys seated on the floor.

 

The entire place bore the lingering scent of old books, particles of dust hanging in the air.

 

The second son of the Feiyun Commerce Guild was a frequent visitor of this library, so much so that the librarians waved to him when they saw him on the streets. He was currently sitting cross-legged on the floor, flipping through a book. The pages were worn, and the leather casing was warm against his hand. 

 

“Xingqiu, what exactly are we here for again?” the blue haired boy next to him asked, stretching over to poke the other in the shoulder.

 

“Shush, Yunyun, I need inspiration.” Xingqiu replied, swatting away his hand. “And besides, I only have an hour left before I have to go home.”

 

Chongyun sighed, lying down on the carpeted floor, the book he was holding dropping onto his side. “Seriously? You’re nearly 17, there’s no way you have to be home by eight.”

 

“Yeah, my parents don’t like me staying out late.” 

 

It was more than that. 

 

He knew that Chongyun couldn’t know.

 

Xingqiu chewed at his nail, flipping over the page of his book.

 

This particular one was some sort of psychological thriller set in the early 1980s, and was a rare find in the shelves that were stocked full of new 2000s literature. He scribbled down the words he didn’t know the meanings of onto a notebook as he read. 

 

“Can we go to the convenience store after this?” Chongyun said, standing up to find another book. “All of these stories are so… boring.”

 

“You’re so kind, really. Such a great attention span.” Xingqiu replied, with as much sarcasm as he could inject into his voice. “And… yeah, sure. If we have time.”

 

Minutes ticked by, only interrupted by the flipping of a page or the rustling of clothes. Xingqiu liked that about the library, it was peaceful and full of things to do. It was even nicer if he brought along headphones, tuning out every interruption.

 

There was only so long that one could go in a household without being disturbed.

 

Which was strange, because usually none of his family members were the ones that did so.

 

“It's seven fifty Qiu, can we go now?” Chongyun pleaded, slicing through the quiet air like a knife. For someone as soft spoken as Chongyun, he was loud at all the wrong times.

 

“Ugh, fine. I’m assuming you’re going to buy a popsicle or something?” Xingqiu sighed, setting down his book. He’d made a small pile of the ones he was planning to borrow this week, and he lifted them up and dropped them into Chongyun’s hands.

 

“-Hey! I’m not carrying your stuff for you!” 

 

“Yes you are. Be a good boyfriend, won’t you?” 

 

Xingqiu smirked as his words registered in Chongyun’s mind. The boy rolled his eyes, the corners of his mouth turning into a grin. 

 

“Don’t expect me to do this forever though.”

 

“Oh yes you will, Yunyun.” Xingqiu responded, turning around and patting the boy on the head. “Maybe all I want is someone who will carry my books around for me, y’know.”

 

“You have your… whatsitcalled… servants to do that!” Chongyun scoffed. “Prolly like, a hundred of them considering how rich you are.”

 

“They’re called assistants, idiot. And no, I’m not dragging around one of them when I have you to do it! Besides, you’re much more handsome than any of my dad’s assistants.”

 

“Thank Archons for that.” Chongyun replied dryly. 

 

“...Am I paying for your snacks?”

 

“Yes, yes you are.”