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It was supposed to be a simple outing.
Just the two of you, no Avengers, no portals, no missions. Only a lazy stroll through the Saturday market in downtown New York. Loki had insisted on going in mortal clothing (“disguise,” he’d called it, as though a cashmere coat and gloves made him invisible). You’d long since stopped arguing with his idea of “casual.”
It was a good day. The sun was bright but not oppressive, the air filled with chatter and the faint aroma of baked bread and roasted coffee. Loki had been in an attentive mood all morning, holding your hand as you walked, adjusting your scarf, offering you every treat that caught your eye.
“Try this one,” he murmured, tearing a piece of croissant and bringing it to your lips. “It’s inferior to the bakeries of Paris, but you mortals do try.”
You rolled your eyes, but you ate it anyway, and his expression softened at the sight.
And then it started.
As you lingered by a flower stall, you noticed two women passing behind you.
“Oh my god,” one whispered, not even trying to be subtle. “Did you see that? He’s feeding her.”
“I wish my boyfriend would do that,” her friend muttered, clutching her iced latte like a lifeline.
Loki turned slightly, catching every word. His brows lifted, a small frown tugging at his mouth. He leaned down toward you.
“They…wish their men would feed them?”
You stifled a laugh. “You’re not supposed to take it literally.”
“Then what in the Nine Realms do they mean?”
“It’s just an expression,” you said. “They mean they wish their boyfriends were a bit more attentive. You know...sweet, romantic gestures. Compliments. Not acting like cavemen.”
He looked truly scandalized. “You mean to tell me these men…do not treat their partners as they deserve?”
“Welcome to Midgard,” you said, patting his chest.
He didn’t answer. You could see the gears turning in his mind, that particular expression of disbelief he reserved for discovering yet another flaw in humanity’s collective behavior.
You should’ve known that was only the beginning.
You were paying for a bouquet of tulips. You turned your head for what felt like thirty seconds, maybe forty, and when you looked back…
Loki was surrounded.
A small crowd of women had formed a semicircle around him, all of them visibly animated, some even gesturing passionately. Loki stood in the middle, hair gleaming in the sun, one hand resting on his hip like some sort of moral authority.
Your first thought was: He’s caused another incident.
But as you approached, the conversation became clear.
“I asked him to hold my hand in public,” one woman was saying, “and he said it was childish.”
Loki looked deeply unimpressed. “Childish? Affection is not childish, it is civilized.”
Another chimed in. “My husband hasn’t said I look beautiful in, like, a year.”
Loki’s tone sharpened. “Then he must be blind or ungrateful. Both are unacceptable qualities in a life-long partner.”
You stopped dead in your tracks, bouquet dangling from your hand.
“Oh no,” you whispered.
It wasn’t just a few passersby now, it was a gathering. A spontaneous “support group for neglected girlfriends of disgraceful men,” as he would later describe it. They hung onto Loki’s every word like disciples.
A third woman sighed dreamily. “He’s so right. My fiancé hasn’t taken me on a proper date in months.”
Loki, appalled, pressed a hand to his chest. “Then why remain with him? You are not livestock to be ignored! Any fool can claim a woman. It takes a man of substance to deserve her.”
That was met with enthusiastic nods. One woman actually clapped.
You facepalmed.
When you finally elbowed your way into the circle, Loki turned toward you with a triumphant air.
“Ah, darling. You’ve returned. I was merely enlightening these ladies about proper courtship standards.”
“You were lecturing them,” you corrected.
“They asked for my wisdom,” he said with complete sincerity. “And rightly so. The state of modern relationships is abysmal. No poetry, no decorum, no...” He gestured vaguely at you. “...adoration.”
A few of the women sighed as if he’d quoted Shakespeare.
You pinched the bridge of your nose. “Okay, everyone, as much as I appreciate his… philosophical outreach program, I think he’s monopolized enough of your Saturday.”
Someone piped up from the back: “Can he do TED Talks?”
“Absolutely not,” you said firmly.
Loki looked offended. “Why not? I am clearly improving the lives of these mortals.”
You stared at him. “By telling them to dump their boyfriends?”
“Only the negligent ones,” he said smoothly. “Really, I fail to see the problem.”
The crowd tittered. Several women actually thanked him before dispersing, phones in hand, already texting someone. One of them called over her shoulder, “Thank you, mysterious stranger! You’ve changed my perspective!”
Loki waved like a benevolent monarch.
You grabbed his arm. “Come on, your majesty, before you start a revolution.”
Back at the car, you couldn’t resist. “A support group, Loki? Really?”
He looked very pleased with himself. “They needed guidance. It is disgraceful how many of your mortal men lack basic chivalry. I was merely setting a new standard.”
You buckled your seatbelt, biting back a laugh. “You realize you just caused like, ten breakups, right?”
“Then I have liberated ten women from the shackles of mediocrity,” he said calmly, settling into the passenger seat.
You shook your head, smiling despite yourself. “You’re impossible.”
“Impossibly charming,” he corrected, taking your hand and brushing a kiss across your knuckles. “And unlike certain others, I do treat you as you deserve.”
You sighed, turning the key in the ignition. “You know they’re probably posting about you online right now, right? There’s gonna be some viral video titled ‘Elegant British Man Starts Feminist Revolution at Farmers Market.’”
He looked utterly unbothered. “Then perhaps they’ll learn something.”
You gave him a side-eye. “Like what?”
He smirked. “That chivalry isn’t dead. It just relocated to Asgard.”
You laughed all the way home.
Peter Parker, as usual, knew about what was going on on the internet before a whole team of PR managers.
You were in the communal kitchen at the Avengers compound, making tea while Loki read beside you, his long legs stretched across another chair, flipping through a Midgardian newspaper like he was trying to imitate domestic normalcy. He’d gotten oddly attached to the crossword section, claiming it “kept his mind limber.”
Then Peter rushed in, phone in hand, face lit with teenage horror and glee.
“Okay, so, uh...don’t freak out, but Loki is trending.”
Loki looked up lazily. “I beg your pardon?”
“Trending,” Peter repeated, waving his phone. “Like, viral. On the internet. You’re all over TikTok and Twitter and…Reddit, which...never mind. Point is, there’s a video of you. From downtown.”
You froze mid-pour, teacup halfway filled. “What video?”
“Oh, this is so good,” Peter said, grinning and setting the phone on the table. “Here, I’ll show you.”
Loki leaned forward, eyes narrowing in suspicion. You came around to look just as Peter hit play.
The video began shakily, someone’s phone camera trained from a café terrace. And there he was - Loki, your Loki, in his mortal disguise, surrounded by a semicircle of women, gesturing animatedly with one hand while the other rested elegantly on the back of a chair.
“...you must demand respect!” his voice rang out clear as a bell. “If a man cannot cherish you, then he is not worthy of your company, much less your heart!”
The women around him clapped. Someone said “preach!” and he nodded solemnly like an Asgardian messiah.
Peter was practically choking with laughter. “They’re calling you the God of Feminism.”
Loki stared, mouth slightly open, in what you could only describe as horrified dignity.
“…You jest,” he said finally.
“Nope,” said Peter, swiping down. “You’ve got, like, a million likes. Here, look at the comments.”
He scrolled.
“Who IS this man???”
“He’s right and he should say it louder.”
“This elf-looking dude just fixed my relationship.”
“Petition to crown him King of Men.”
“He and Hozier singlehandedly restored by faith in mankind."
“Is he single?? Asking for my divorced mom.”
By this point, you were trying not to laugh so hard you spilled your tea. Loki turned to you slowly, betrayal in his eyes.
“You recorded me?”
“I did not! Someone must have. I told you somebody would. Oh my god, this is amazing...”
He rose to his full, intimidating height. “This is an outrage. My words, taken out of context and spread among millions of Midgardians?!”
Peter looked both terrified and entertained. “I mean, technically you’re helping gender equality while validating chivalry. Which is…kinda awesome.”
“Awesome?” Loki repeated, as if tasting the word and finding it bitter. “Do they not realize who I am?”
“Well, that’s the thing,” Peter said sheepishly. “Some people think you’re, like, an actor or something. But a lot of people think you’re...uh...some kind of life coach?”
“Life coach,” Loki said blankly.
That’s when Tony walked in, holding his coffee, looking far too awake for nine a.m. “Alright, why am I hearing about a Norse god starting a feminist movement on my PR watch?”
“Tony,” you said between fits of laughter, “you have to see this...”
Peter replayed the clip. Tony watched silently, sipped his coffee, then exhaled sharply.
“…He’s not wrong.”
Loki threw his hands up. “You agree with me?”
“I mean,” Tony shrugged, “when you’re right, you’re right. Honestly, if I gave Pepper half that speech back in the day, maybe she’d have married me sooner.”
Natasha strolled in next, curious. “What are we watching?”
Peter hit play again. She leaned over his shoulder, watched for fifteen seconds, and said flatly, “Oh my god. He’s empowering women.”
“He’s terrifying women’s boyfriends,” Tony corrected. “Check out the duets, there’s a whole compilation of dudes watching it and sweating.”
Nat pulled out her phone, scrolling with professional detachment. “The comments are gold. ‘Find yourself a man like Loki.’ ‘We stan an Asgardian ally.’ Oh wait, someone edited you over a feminist protest montage.”
“Edited me...?” Loki’s voice cracked.
She turned her screen to show him a dramatic video with his speech dubbed over slow-motion clips of women marching, ending with bold white text:
“THE GOD OF FEMINISM. #LokiIsRight #DumpHim #AsgardianStandards”
Loki just stared, hands clasped behind his back like a man processing the absurdity of mortal existence.
“Thor!” Tony called down the hall. “Come see what your brother’s done!”
Moments later, the God of Thunder arrived, beaming. “Brother! They speak of you again!”
“They mock me again,” Loki corrected.
“Mock?” Thor repeated, watching the clip. Halfway through, he clapped Loki on the shoulder so hard Peter flinched. “Nonsense! You speak wisdom! Even the mightiest warriors of Asgard would agree, every woman deserves to be treated as a queen!”
“Exactly,” Natasha said dryly. “That’s why he’s gone viral.”
Thor looked utterly delighted. “So you are a hero once more, Brother! Look, this one calls you ‘based.’ That sounds noble.”
Tony smirked. “It doesn’t mean what you think it means, big guy.”
“Does it not?” Thor frowned, looking to Loki. “Brother, does ‘based’ not mean wise?”
Loki’s jaw tightened. “It means my humiliation is complete.”
You were crying with laughter now, leaning into Loki’s shoulder for support. He glared down at you, but the glare was half-hearted at best.
“Darling,” you wheezed, “you’re a feminist icon.”
“I am a god,” he hissed. “A prince of Asgard, a master of sorcery...”
“...and a feminist icon,” Tony interrupted, raising his coffee in salute. “Congrats on joining the modern age.”
Thor wrapped an arm around his sputtering brother. “Truly, Loki, your words have touched hearts across the realm!”
Peter held up his phone again. “Guys, there’s merch.”
Loki blinked. “Merch?”
Peter turned the screen, and there it was. Someone had already made T-shirts that said “Respect is a Due Tribute – Loki Laufeyson, 2025.”
Loki stared at it for a long, dreadful moment. Then he turned to you, voice low and deadly calm. “Burn it all.”
You grinned. “Too late. You’re a meme now, my love.”
Tony raised a brow. “So…what’s next, the Loki Feminism Foundation?”
“Don’t tempt him,” you warned.
But Loki’s expression shifted, the faint, dangerous curl of a smirk returning to his mouth.
“…Perhaps,” he murmured, “I could use this influence to my advantage.”
“Oh no,” Peter groaned.
Tony sighed. “We’re never living this down.”
Nat looked up from her phone. “Too late. He’s already verified on Twitter.”
Thor whooped. “Brother, you are famous!”
Loki tilted his head, eyes glittering. “Yes. And now that the mortals listen…” He looked at you, smirking faintly. “Perhaps I’ll teach them more.”
You met his gaze, fighting a grin. “What kind of lessons?”
He leaned down until his lips brushed your ear. “The kind they’ll never forget.”