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“You never actually… told me why you trusted Ash so easily,” Mapicc states one day, head tilted in genuine ask. “Can I know?”
Spoke stills.
It was an innocent inquiry, truly. Mapicc didn’t mean anything by it.
But it still hurt to be asked such a thing.
Again, he’s reminded that he kept something important from his best friend. Albeit, not as harsh as the other lies he’s spilt.
Mapicc is used to him dodging questions by now; he probably already moved on when he noticed Spoke freeze yet again at a simple question.
As Spoke blinks back into reality, he finds it to be true. Mapicc is babbling in complaint about something Zam did to piss him off.
“You… want to know about him?” Spoke asks, voice fragile like it hasn’t been for months.
This time, it’s Mapicc’s turn to be still. He opens his mouth, but no sound comes out. He truly didn’t expect Spoke to answer after he froze.
“Yes. Will you tell me?” Mapicc finds his voice, slowly dropping his hands from where he was making frustrated gestures.
Spoke swallows thickly, unsure how Mapicc will react to this piece of information he has been keeping this whole time.
The truth is, Spoke did mean to tell Mapicc when Ash first showed up in that cave when they were chased by the invisible players—unknowingly, the mafia at the time.
But it never came up.
Mapicc had never asked why Spoke trusted Ash so concerningly much until now.
And then the mafia rolled around, and Spoke thought it would be best to not tell Mapicc he was related to Ash in any way, in fear of being cast out.
In fear that Mapicc would see Ash was right about what he said.
Something about the apple not falling far from the tree.
Is that the right analogy?
“Ash…” Spoke starts, voice cracking on the last syllable. He hasn’t uttered that name in what feels like forever; the name alone sparks tears in Spoke’s eyes, for a reason he can’t bring himself to name.
Mapicc nods slowly, encouraging Spoke to continue with his sentence.
“A-Ash, he’s my, my brother.” Spoke stutters out after a moment of agonising silence.
Mapicc stops. And Spoke squeezes his eyes shut in fear of the emotion that will cross Mapicc’s face.
Would it be anger? Anger, angry that Spoke had kept this a secret for so long from him and everyone else, would he be angry that Spoke was related to Ash, even though it was out of his control?
Or would it be pity? Would he find it in himself to pity Spoke for being related to someone like Ash, a monster? Perhaps he would find Spoke pitiful enough not to throw him out, or maybe he would even find it pitiful that Spoke thinks he won’t turn out to be just like Ash in the end.
But before Spoke could spiral any further, he felt solid hands on his shoulders, which caused him to slowly open an eye.
Mapicc looked… stricken.
Huh?
Spoke swallows thickly, waiting for Mapicc to say something.
“He.. Ash is your brother?” Mapicc asks, voice slightly strained from an emotion Spoke can’t quite place. Confusion? Anger? He’s not sure.
Spoke nods slowly, biting the inside of his cheek nervously. Mapicc doesn’t seem to be receiving this news well, if the slashing of his tail was any indicator.
“You don’t… look related?” Mapicc chokes out suddenly, and Spoke rears back in shock.
What.
“Excuse me?” Spoke manages out, Mapicc’s hands are off his shoulders now.
“You don’t look related to him!” Mapicc says, face now donning utter confusion.
“Mapicc!” Spoke squeaks, running a hand down his face in disbelief.
Are we serious right now?
“What?”
“Obviously, we don’t look related!” Spoke hisses, hands outstretched to the sides. “I cover my glitch side up.” Spoke mumbles, rubbing his temples.
“Why?” Mapicc tilts his head in confusion, he seems to be doing that a lot today.
“Well, it’s not necessarily a good look to be related to a former mafia leader that terrorised and indoctrinated half the server into a cult!” Spoke says, rolling his eyes at his best friend.
“I didn’t take you for one to be concerned about public image.” Mapicc huffs, amused, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Yeah, well.. only when it comes to looking related to Ash.” Spoke huffs back at him annoyedly.
Mapicc contemplates this for a moment before shaking his head.
“Well, I don’t think you should be ashamed of it,” Mapicc starts, gingerly reaching forward to grab one of Spoke’s hands in his own, tail slashing mildly behind him.
“I mean, you’re not Ash.”
Not Ash.
Spoke stills for a moment, eyes shimmering slightly.
Oh Mapicc, if only you knew.
“The other players can’t discriminate against you for something you can’t control, like your family. That’s just wrong. It’s like saying Lomedy is as bad as Flame for associating with him.” Mapicc shrugs, dropping Spoke’s hand in favour of throwing an arm around his shoulders instead.
Spoke leans into the demon’s side.
I wouldn’t use that analogy, but sure.
“Thank you, Mapicc.” Spoke says quietly, earning a small hum of acknowledgement from the other.
“Anytime.”
The two stay in the awkward side hug for a moment before parting.
“Also, don’t ever say that to someone in real life ever.”
“Say what?”
“That they don’t look related to their sibling, or something.”
“Why?”
“What if they’re like adopted? You’re just being mean then.”
“Oh.”
“Hey, can I see your glitch side?”
“Pff, in your dreams, bro.”
“No, pleaseeee Spoke!”