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It had been 6 months since Nancy and Jonathan broke up, and Nancy wanted to start dating again to get her mind off things.
She just couldn't find any boy to crush on. So she made a list in hopes of crushing on one.
1. John from math
2. Nicholas (he was super sweet to her)
3. David Stevens
John and her sometimes spoke in math. He was quite smart and had brought her coffee a few times. She didn't like any of them, but it's the thought that counts. Robin wouldn't have messed it up.
She tried to fit her and his name together. Jancy was hers and Jonathan's, so it was off the table. Nohn didn't sound good, so she had to think harder.
On Monday, they had first period together, and she slipped him her number with 'Date?' written at the top. He smirked when he read it and immediately went on his phone.
She felt hers buzz in her pocket and forced a smile back before fishing it out. He had texted a simple 'Yes'.
Nancy knew the man was supposed to plan the date, but he was also supposed to ask the women out, so she texted him the details she'd already thought of. John looked at her with surprise but hearted the message and put his phone in his pocket.
The date was the next morning since neither of them had math on Tuesday. Nancy put on one of her purple blouses. She decided that she'd only wear pink when she found the one. She had worn pink when she and Robin went out on a 'Galentine's'.
Nancy ordered herself a coffee since she didn't want him to order her a sugary, nasty concoction. She sipped her coffee and tapped her foot impatiently. He was already 5 minutes late.
It wasn't much but Nancy hated waiting.
He finally arrived 10 minutes late and grabbed himself a muffin and a coffee. She smiled at him and he smiled back.
It was going well until he started eating his muffin and talking with his mouth full. Crumbs were flying everywhere, and she could see the mushed-up mess in his mouth.
She held back a grimace the rest of the date. After it was finally over, he asked to take her out again, but she declined. The next day at school, he moved his seat.
1. John from math
2. Nicholas (he was super sweet to her)
3. David Stevens
Nicholas was a barista in the school's café she goes to when she's late. It was usually once a week, but now she upped it to 3 times a week.
She made sure to smile a little extra bright at him, to which he'd blush. He seemed a little shy but always smiled back.
One day there was a number written on her cup with a little smiley face. He had avoided eye contact while handing it to her, his face bright red.
She typed the number in her phone but hesitated when she went to hit send. It felt like something was telling that he wasn't the one. She ignored it and texted him anyway.
He didn't respond, but she didn't really expect him to, considering he was working. An hour later, he texted her back, asking her out to dinner on Friday.
She agreed but didn't feel any butterflies like she hoped she would. In fact, she felt nothing. She felt all of that for Robin.
On Thursday, she felt a bit nervous but picked out a nice light blue blouse and a white skirt. He texted her Friday morning to confirm their date. She responded with a yes and a smiley face.
Since their names both started with an N, she couldn't mash their names together with something as simple as changing the first letter.
Niancy?
Nacholas?
Neither sounded right. Maybe she could mix their last names. Though she doesn't know his yet. Nancy knew Robin's last name and had a ship name in mind for both of their names.
Nicholas picked her up at 6 and held the car door open. He already got points for not being late. They drove to a nice restaurant that wasn't too expensive.
He had made reservations, so they were sat down immediately. Nancy noted this with a small smile.
Nicholas was kind, a gentleman, and very thoughtful. He was seeming to be the one.
The waitress took their drink orders, then disappeared to go put them in. Nicholas smiled from across the table. "So are you more of a small talk kind of girl, or do you just get straight into it?"
Nancy thought for a second. She'd already known her past boyfriends, so she never really got to learn which she preferred. She settled for a shrug. "I already knew my past boyfriends before dating them. How about you? Small talk or deep conversations?"
The boy across from her smiled as the question was turned back on him. "I guess I'm more of a deep conversations guy. I'm not looking for some casual thing. I want to find the one."
Nancy smiled back, "Well, I guess we'll see where this date goes then. I'm not looking for anything casual either."
Nicholas smiled at their mutual wants. He hoped that Nancy was the one. She was kind, smart, and quite funny. She was also very pretty, making his heart race.
The date went smoothly; they even ordered dessert. At the end of the night, Nicholas walked her to her door.
"I had fun. I hope we can go out again sometimes," He said, a soft smile on his face.
Nancy nodded, but she was still unsure. She liked hanging out with him, but the romantic tension was still missing for her.
He leaned down and kissed her lips, catching her off guard. When she didn't kiss back, he pulled away, looking slightly hurt.
Nancy tried to hold back her grimace. "I'm sorry, Nicholas. This date was fun, and I liked hanging out with you, but I just don't feel romantically attracted to you."
Tears welled up in his eyes, and he looked down. "It's okay. I understand. Maybe we can just be friends?"
The brunette nodded, "I'm really sorry."
He shook his head, still attempting to blink away the tears. "No, no, it's fine. You can't control who you have feelings for. I'll see you around, Nancy."
She waved goodbye, and he walked away. Her heart was beating quickly in her chest, but not from the date. Robin wouldn't leave her mind.
Short blonde hair Something was haunting her dreams. They always started off as nightmares, then Robin sin would come into view, and the scene would shift.
Always back to the last night she last saw Robin her. To the night she realized she had- feelings
///Flashback 3 months ago
It was the late July, only 2 weeks before Nancy had to leave for college. Her and Robin were in the Wheeler basement watching a movie.
Robin had her legs sprawled over Nancy's lap, and she was loudly munching on the popcorn she was shoving in her mouth. The brunette glared at her, "Robbie, shhhh. You're eating too loudly."
The blonde only smirked and munched louder. Nancy shoved her lightly, not enough to push her off but just to nudge her. Robin slammed her leg down into Nancy's lap, then the brunette fully pushed her.
She ended up on the floor with popcorn flying from her mouth and loud laughter playing from her lips. It was like a melody. Nancy felt her face growing red.
But it didn't make any sense. Robin was a girl. Nancy didn't like girls; she liked guys.
When Robin climbed back on the couch, she realized something was wrong. Nancy didn't let her touch her and instead balled herself up.
"You should go. I need to be alone," Nancy said, her shoulders tense and brick walls surrounding her heart.
The blonde looked at her with hurt and confusion, not understanding the shift in behavior. "Did I do something?"
Nancy refused to look at her but shook her head, "I just need you to go."
She listened and left, then cried on her way home. Robin didn't understand where this suddenly came from. Nancy refused to even look at her.
Later that night at the Wheeler's dinner table, Nancy was distracted. Robin wouldn't leave her mind.
She thought of her hands, her hair, her clothes, her smell, her eyes, just everything that reminded her of Robin. She couldn't focus on the plate in front of her, mostly pushing the food around.
Then her dad sneered, "I saw two boys holding hands today. It's disgusting how the times have changed. Why is it okay for this sin to be walking around? Back when your mother and I were kids, it was never like this. Now everyone is gay."
Mike tensed up beside her, his grip on his fork noticeably tightened. Ted was still going on about it until the black-haired boy slammed his fork into the table.
"Why can't you just be accepting? It's 2027, not 1987!" He yelled, basically shaking with anger.
Ted glared at him, "You don't know what you're talking about, son. I won't accept a sin."
Mike scoffed, standing up from his seat, "It's not a sin; you're just an ignorant asshole!"
"Michael, sit down or you'll be punished," Ted growled, his anger growing.
The younger boy didn't listen as he crossed his arms, "What if I'm gay, Ted?"
Nancy has never seen her father's face so red. He lunged and grabbed Mike by the collar, "You better fucking not be."
Karen tried to talk him down, but he wasn't having it. Nancy had enough when Ted slammed Mike into the wall, injuring his head.
She threw her father to the floor and cradled her brother, "Mike, are you okay?!"
He buried his face into her shoulder and started to sob. Karen pulled Ted from the kitchen and out of the house while he was still going off.
Mike clutched onto his older sister, fully wrapping his lanky body around her. Nancy cradled him like a child. "It's okay, Mike. I support you, okay? Don't worry about that asshole."
She pressed a light kiss to his head and felt his grin tighten. Then he lifted his head and wiped the tears.
"You support me?" There was mild shock on his face that hurt Nancy's heart.
She reached up and wiped her baby brother's tears. "Of course, I support you, Mike. I'll always support you."
His eyes welled up with tears again, and she pulled him into another hug.
If only she could support herself
Flashback over\\\\\
There was only one boy left on her list.
1. John from math
2. Nicholas (he was super sweet to her)
3. David Stevens
David was a boy she had a crush on in middle school. Sure, they were different now, but she could fall for him again, right?
He lived back in Hawkins, so Nancy wouldn't have a chance until she visited for Thanksgiving break. Which was a few months away.
It's okay, maybe she just needs a few more months to get over Jonathan. That has to be her problem. Who else would she be hung up on? Those blue eyes still lingered in her mind.
When she closed her eyes, she saw Robin's smile, and it was like she was reliving the moment as her eyes studied the girl's freckles. Her bright blue eyes were focused on Nancy, smiling at something the brunette said.
When she opened her eyes, Robin was gone, and she was left with the silence of her room. Nancy couldn't help but feel like an empty pit.
There was a gap that needed to be filled so she could just feel right. She already knew how to fill that gaping hole. It was filled when she closed her eyes and dreamed of blue ones.
The months passed agonizingly slowly. The weather started to chill, and the leaves fell from the trees. Finally, it was November, and Thanksgiving was in a week.
Nancy said goodbye to Nicholas, who was going home to Maine to see his family. Then she headed to the airport.
The flight to Hawkins wasn't bad but she was exhausted. The night before she'd been unable to sleep with things on her mind. Possibly seeing Robin again.
If the blonde was there, Nancy doesn't know what she would do. She hadn't spoken to Robin since she'd realized her feelings.
Just thinking about the girl was like pressing on an injury. She might break down if she sees her. Nancy often thinks of Robin, and it feels like a never-healing bruise.
Nancy Wheeler came here for David Stevens and she won't let her thoughts get to her. After their talk, Mike asked his sister if she was gay. Nancy shook her head but she knew he could tell she was in denial.
////All those months ago, Nancy had chosen to leave a few weeks early, taking off the day after Ted's meltdown. Her mother begged her to stay a little longer, and she could tell Mike was hurt.
Holly cried, and Nancy just held her until she had to leave. Her little sister had clutched her hand tightly, and it hurt Nancy so much to force her off.
Karen had to hold back the screaming child as she begged Nancy to stay through tears. Nancy looked over at Mike, who was also crying.
Other than last night, he almost never cried. The brunette swallowed her feelings and slammed her eyes shut before she could change her mind. "I'll be back for Thanksgiving. I promise."
Then she walked out the Wheeler's door.\\\\
Months later, she was now standing outside of it, ready to reenter. Nancy rammed her hand into the door and heard an annoyed scoff from her brother.
He threw open the door, expecting to see someone selling something or a ding-dong ditch. Instead, when he saw Nancy, tears sprung to his eyes, and he lunged at her.
Mike's lanky arms wrapped around her, and he bent down so he could melt into her shoulder. Nancy cradled him, her mind going back to the night before she left.
But when he pulled back, instead of tears, there was a big smile on his face. "You're really back."
Nancy smiled softly, "I'm back. I wasn't lying when I said I'd come for Thanksgiving."
The boy then moved out of the way so she could come in. She did just that and kicked off her shoes. It was weird to be back, but at the same time, it was like she never left.
Mike dropped back on the couch next to Will, who Nancy hadn't noticed before. She smiled at the boy, gesturing for him to get up so she could give him a hug.
She pulled Will into his arms, and he melted into her the same way her brother did. It was a familiar warmth, one she'd felt for her brother and his group of friends.
The brunette boy was a little more emotional than his friend and started to tear up, "I'm so glad you're back."
Nancy cooed at him, "Oh, Will, it's alright." As they pulled back, her hands slid to his arms, and she gently rubbed them with her thumbs to comfort him.
But he shook his head, "It's happy tears, I promise. I just missed you."
She pulled him in for another hug and then spotted her brother standing behind them awkwardly. Nancy grabbed his arm and tugged him into the hug.
He complained but wrapped his arms around both of them nonetheless. Mike was the first to pull away, "Alright, enough of this sappy shit."
Nancy chuckled as she pulled away from Will. She had missed his snark as much as she hated to admit it.
She then walked to the kitchen where her mother and Holly were. The little girl's eyes lit up, and she bolted towards her sister.
Holly's arms wrapped around Nancy's waist, and she hugged her back. "Hey, Hol. I missed you."
She felt more arms wrap around her, and she turned to her mother, "I missed you too, Mom."
After a minute or two, her mom pulled back, but Holly refused to let go. Nancy lifted her into her arms, and the little girl rested her head on her shoulder.
"Do you need any help?" She questioned, peeking into to the pot on the stove.
Karen shook her head, "No, no, don't worry, sweetie. I have it handled. Go to the living room with Holly and spend some time with the boys. Dinner will be done soon."
Nancy wanted to argue but it wasn't like she could do much with Holly in her arms. She nodded and went to the living room then sat down next to Will.
He leaned forward and paused the movie him and Mike were watching making the other boy groan. Then he turned to her, "So Nancy, how is life in Boston?"
"Well, I'm thinking of dropping out of school, actually. But I think I'll stay in Boston. My life there isn't bad, and I've made a friend," she said, a soft smile on her face as she thought of Nicholas.
Will raised a brow, "Oh? A boyfriend?"
Nancy shook her head. "We went on one date, but I just didn't like him like that. I don't know if he still likes me."
Will looked at her curiously but didn't say anything more. The conversation moved on, and they chatted until Karen called them in for dinner.
Nancy had yet to see Ted, and she was honestly unsure if he and her mother were even together. She sat down in her regular seat at the table and grabbed a plate.
Once everyone was sat down, Nancy turned to her mother, "What happened with Ted?"
Karen seemed taken off guard. "Well, we're in the process of getting divorced. He's been staying at the hotel."
Nancy's eyebrows raised in surprise but the shock quickly went away and was replaced with a smile, "Well good. I hope you're happier mom."
Karen smiled back, “Yes, I am, sweetie. Now eat. Then we have to catch up. You've barely kept in contact."
The brunette looked a little guilty. She'd barely answered any of her family’s texts. Her father was blocked only 2 days after she left.
He'd spammed her phone, calling her a bunch of names and telling her to come back. The first day, she tried to ignore them but decided to just block him on the second.
She wasn't sure why she'd been ignoring her mother and brother. It just felt too hard to text them.
But she was home now, so that didn't matter. Ted was gone, and everything was good. So why did it still feel like something was missing?
The conversation shifted to Thanksgiving, and Nancy turned to her mother, "Who's coming this year?"
Karen thought it over in her head for a moment. “Well, we'll have the Byers and Steve. Also, I believe Robin is coming."
Nancy's body went rigid. Sure, she knew seeing Robin could possibly happen, but for her to be going over the Wheelers? That was unexpected.
Karen didn't seem to notice her sudden change in attitude. "I'll need your help making the food. Mike doesn't pay enough attention."
Mike huffed from his seat, "I only burnt something once!"
Karen's eyes met his. "No, you've burned something every time I've tried to teach you to cook, honey. It's okay; it's just not a skill you have."
His usually grouchy look darkened his face but lessened when Will rested a hand on his arm. He pulled himself out of his chair, “Mike and I are going to his room, is that okay?"
Karen nodded, "Of course it is, sweetie. Just bring your plates to the kitchen."
Holly went to her room shortly after, and Nancy helped Karen clean up. As they were washing up, her mother gave her a knowing look. "Did something happen with Robin?"
Like earlier, Nancy immediately tensed, "What? Why do you say that?"
Karen sighed and set down the dish she was drying. "You tense every time I say her name, hon. Did she reject you?"
Nancy felt her face grow hot, "Wha-? No! I don't even like girls like that!"
But her red face said otherwise. Karen didn’t look like she believed her either. “Listen, if this is because of the things your father has always said, don't listen to him. I don't care if you're gay, straight, or like both, okay? I support you no matter what."
The brunette didn't know what to say, her hands no longer washing the dishes. She shut the running water off and shook her hands. "I'm just going to go to my room."
Karen had worry in her eyes, but Nancy ignored it as she bolted up the stairs. She shut and locked her door behind her, wanting to be alone with her thoughts.
She wasn't allowed to feel this.
Her father had said so.
But her mother looked at her with so much love and said it was okay. That it was okay to like Robin.
To like a girl.
Nancy never thought about what her mother thought about it. Her thoughts were too flooded with her dad's opinions.
Karen never commented on it; she just sat there like a silent, obedient wife. That’s why it surprised Nancy when she found out they were in the process of divorce. Her mom always just took it and listened but never defended herself or anyone else.
Nancy didn't hate her for it, but it did make her frown when it crossed her mind. Her mind raced with thoughts of her father's words.
But instead of spiraling into her usual breakdown, new words played over his. I support you no matter what.
Ted's words weren't gone, but they were muted. Nancy thinks she may actually be in the process of accepting herself for the first time in her life.
//1 week later\\
It was Thanksgiving Day. Nancy and Karen were in the kitchen cooking all the food.
Today, Nancy would be seeing Robin after all those months. She'd constantly thought about Robin before, but this week, she was all that was in Nancy's head.
Robin, Robin, Robin, Robin, Robin, Robin.
Everywhere she turned, there was a memory of Robin. A memory of her blonde hair splayed out as she lay in Nancy's bed or her blue eyes looking into the brunette's from the couch.
She was snapped out of her head by Karen pacing a hand on her shoulder. Her mother didn't say anything, just gave her a soft, knowing look.
Her mother could read her like an open book, something Nancy both liked and hated. The doorbell rang, and she could hear Mike's footsteps pound down the stairs as he rushed to the door.
When he opened it to Steve and Robin, he let out a groan. Robin raised a brow, "Nice to see you too, little Wheeler."
Mike glared at her and bolted back up the stairs.
Nancy watched them from the kitchen while her mom went to greet them. Robin looked at her, and a look of shock came over her face. She obviously wasn't expecting Nancy to be there.
It made sense. Nancy hadn't told anyone she was back and had been avoiding Steve and Robin's hangout places like the plague.
The blonde studied her for a moment before turning back to Karen. Nancy sighed and took a deep breath to pull herself together, then walked to the front door.
Karen led them to the living room, then went back to the kitchen. Nancy tried to follow her, but she brushed her off and told her to catch up. The brunette didn't miss the look Karen gave her.
Steve greeted her with a big smile, while Robin just stared. There was tension in the room that Steve was just oblivious to as he started to talk about what was going on in his life.
Nancy wasn't sure what he was saying; she was too busy staring at Robin. The other girl refused to look at her, opting to stare at Steve instead.
Until finally there was another knock on the door, and Nancy stood up. Before she could get to the door, Mike raced past her and threw it open.
"Will!" He exclaimed, finally seeing who he wanted. Mike grabbed his wrist and pulled him upstairs to his room.
The rest of Byers greeted Nancy, who led them to the dining room. Dinner was done only 5 minutes later, and Nancy retrieved Robin and Steve from the living room.
The rest of the night, Robin wouldn't look at her.
When Nancy was turned away, she felt a burning gaze from Robin's direction. However, when she turned to the blonde, she had already looked away.
It was like she had a 6th sense when Nancy was going to look at her and always turned away in time. There was an itching desire to speak to her, but Robin had chosen a seat across the table, and with all the voices overlapping, it was impossible.
Hours later, the night had come to an end. The Byers left, except Will, who was sleeping over. Steve and Robin were at the door, getting ready to leave, when Nancy walked up to them.
She shifted and swallowed down her nerves. "Robin," as the word left her mouth, the girl looked up at her with surprise. "Would you like to sleep over?"
The blonde froze, her eyes darting between Steve and Nancy. She looked unsure, like she was fighting an internal battle. Steve patted her shoulder. "Of course she would! Now I should get going."
He almost tripped trying to shove his foot into his shoe. “Okay, bye! Happy Thanksgiving!"
Robin still hadn't said anything, still standing there in shock. Nancy grabbed her wrist to pull her upstairs, but as soon as their skin connected, Robin jolted back.
The brunette quickly pulled her hand back, and her gaze dropped to the floor. Her face was burning in embarrassment from the rejected touch. "Sorry. Let's go upstairs."
Robin followed behind her as they walked to Nancy's room. Once the door shut behind them, the tension in the room thickened until it was almost unbreathable.
Nancy took a seat on the bed while Robin stood awkwardly. She was acting as if she'd never been in Nancy's room. Her eyes glazed over everything, just like they had the first time she walked in.
The brunette's too hadn't changed. Robin just didn't want to look at her. At least that was what Nancy was going with, considering how the girl had been acting towards her.
She got why. Months ago, she had just kicked Robin out with no explanation.
Now here they were back in her room. Nothing had happened, and yet so much had at the same time.
Nancy mind was racing. She wanted to tell Robin the truth, but at the same time, she was terrified. It wasn't about being accepted; Robin was gay himself. It was about being rejected.
She had no idea if the blonde even liked her like that. Robin could be dating someone for all she knew.
Nancy patted the bed beside her, "I want to talk. And apologize for making you leave like that all those months ago."
The blonde hesitated but sat down on the bed. She didn't sit close to Nancy like the brunette was hoping; instead, she was almost at the edge.
"I'm sorry for kicking you out like that. It was rude, and I gave you no explanation. Then I just disappeared." Nancy took a few deep breaths, trying to work up confidence for what she was about to confess. "Telling you now doesn't fix the fact that I made mistakes, but I was scared. I realized... that um..."
Robin was staring at her expectantly, but softly, Nancy just wanted to kiss her. Her nerves were all over the place as she tried to force the words out: “Sorry, I don't know why this is so hard. I-I... I like you, Robin. Like romantically."
The blonde's eyes expanded in shock. It was obviously not at all what she was expecting. "Oh."
It was the first time she'd spoken to Nancy in months. Her raspy voice made the brunette's heart race.
Robin processed the information for a moment, then moved closer to Nancy until there were only a few inches between them. "Then why did you disappear? Why did you kick me out?"
Nancy looked down in shame. "I was scared... my dad had always gone on about how it's a sin. I guess it was just easier. I've spent these past few months trying to ignore my feelings, but... you just won't leave my mind."
Robin's face flushed, and she was glad the brunette was looking down. She rested a hand on Nancy's thigh. “Look, I'm not mad. I understand. I wish you had gone about it a different way, but that won't change what happened."
The shorter girl looked up at her in shock, “You’re not? I kicked you out and didn't talk to you for months!"
Robin raised a brow, "Do you want me to be mad at you?"
Nancy shook her head immediately. "No! But I figured you would be. At least a little. You didn't seem happy when you were avoiding me all day."
The taller girl sighed. “Yeah, well, I wasn't sure how you felt about me. When you kicked me out... I thought I did something."
Nancy's head snapped toward her, the girl's eyes wide. "No! You never did anything!"
“Yes, well, I don't always understand social cues. I was confused and hurt and never thought you having romantic feelings for me would be a possibility," Robin said, looking at the floor.
The tension had faded; now a silence fell over the room as the two processed each other’s emotions. Mike and Will's voices sounded through the walls when they yelled over a game on their phones.
Finally, the silence broke when Robin looked over at Nancy. "I like you too. Romantically."
The brunette’s head whipped to her in shock.
1. John from math
2. Nicholas (he was super sweet to her)
3. David Stevens (he never had a chance)
4. Robin Buckley
Once the shock passed, Nancy wasted no time pulling her in for a kiss. Their lips met, and fireworks exploded in Nancy's chest.
Kissing Robin was the best feeling in the world, she decided as she grabbed her face. They were desperate— lips smacking, teeth clashing desperate— but neither cared.
All Nancy was worried about was that she had Robin, and she had wanted her so badly. The yearning was something she'd never felt before.
Sure, she wanted Steve and Jonathan back when she still liked them, but I was nothing compared to the yearning she had for the girl she was kissing.
1. John from math
2. Nicholas (he was super sweet to her)
3. David Stevens (he never had a chance)
4. Robin Buckley
It was always her from the start. It had been her for months.
Nancy pulled back and rested her forehead against Robin's. They both had huge smiles on their faces as they stared into each other's eyes.
"You're so beautiful," Robin whispered, gently caressing Nancy's face.
The brunette kissed her finger, then pecked her lips. "You're even more beautiful."
Robin smiled, and her hands slid down to her arms. She dug her fingers into the pink blouse and pulled Nancy in for another long kiss.
And for once in her life, Nancy Wheeler felt full.