Chapter Text
The current status of Saeyoung Choi? Sleep-deprived and slightly bored.
It is late into the evening. After working thirteen hours straight, he needs something to take his mind off of work. Impulsively he takes his phone in hand. He is greeted by four private messages from Zen. Saeyoung sits up a little straighter in confusion, attention caught. It was rare for Zen to message him, no matter how much Saeyoung spammed him, Zen usually just avoided privately messaging him. He has no idea why Zen would send him a message now,but he would soon find out.
ZEN:Hey Seven,
ZEN: I was wondering about your maid, Mary Vanderwood...
ZEN: She seems the type to have a Tender account... Do you know if she does?
Oh boy, Tender? As in the dating app for single people desperate to hook up?
dude, if you’re just looking for a hookup, go to literally any of your fans, lol. I’m sure they’ll be more than willing to help you.
ZEN: Well... that can get complicated. Nevermind, I shouldn’t have asked,
707: Whoa whoa whoa are you saying you’re being serious here??
ZEN: It’s nothing, nevermind. forget I said anything. I guess I was getting sentimental from one too many drinks. I just thought from that picture you sent that she looked friendly and understanding
Wait. From the picture he sent!? No way. He has to be talking about the picture of “Mary Vanderwood” he sent in the main group chat— aka his beautiful selfie. His heart rate spikes up, simultaneously flattered, and shocked beyond belief. Saeyoung immediately starts typing out a reply, casually joking about how flattered he is about Zen’s sudden interest in him. But then Zen sends another message.
ZEN: I guess because she’s in your line of work with secret keeping, maybe she wouldn’t mind keeping a relationship a secret and that maybe I could have a relationship work out for once.
...Or maybe, just maybe he should just play along and set Zen up a date with “Mary.”
707: No problem, I got you fam.
Saeyoung wasted no time in creating an account on the famous Tender app. Creating the profile took longer than it should have. While this is just a dating app, he couldn’t help pulling full stops to creating a fake identity. Even if Zen recognizes him on sight, it will still be worth a good laugh for both of them. Plus, it would be a nice short-term distraction.
Saeyoung takes great pleasure in being able to pull off ridiculous pranks like this. There is something about being able to have someone believe wholeheartedly in something this ridiculous. But at the same time, he already felt guilty. Saeyoung has no desire to carry out the prank for too long, then he would risk actually hurting Zen’s feelings. But he isn’t. This is just going to be a silly joke that would last at most five days.
It takes a total of twenty seconds to find Zen, or Hyun Ryuu’s account. It is easy to tell from the endless amount of selfies posted of Zen’s face.
He is about to send a chat request, a single tap away, when another idea sprung up. He could take this to the next level; he could dress up as Mary and send a video chat request. Messing with Yoosung is fun, but perhaps it was time someone else got the sharp end of the stick.
He’d be lying if he said he did not enjoy cross-dressing. To look in the mirror and see everyday Luciel for one moment, and then see another side of himself the next moment was exhilarating. He didn’t get enough chances to express this side of himself.
Once he’s changed from his everyday clothes to a more flattering top and skirt, he walks back over to his dresser mirror. Currently he’s staring at a Mary, except without any make up and still wearing striped glasses. Saeyoung quickly takes off his glasses to apply some eyeliner and lipstick. While it was far from the full make up that models wore, he still likes to think he pulls off a pretty cute look. It’s fairly obvious to himself that it’s him, but hey, at least he looks cute.
Saeyoung jumps into the chair next to the desk. Time for step two. Enough time has passed, he can probably send the video request now. Now all he has to do was wait for Zen to pick up, which he undoubtedly would.
Second thoughts started to arise in the seconds that followed. Is this really a good idea? Maybe for once he had taken things too far, maybe-
“Hello?” Zen’s face popped up on the phone of his screen “Oh! Mary Vanderwood, right?”
“Uhh, yup that’s me!” His voice cracked from the sudden switch in pitch. Saeyoung silently cursed at himself for speaking normally for even a second. He could do different impressions rather easily, considering the amount of practice he has had. It was just absent mindedness that made him screw up.
To Saeyoung’s surprise, Zen laughs.
“There’s no need to be so nervous, I promise I mean you no harm.” Zen offers a warm smile.
Zen doesn’t recognize him?
“Hahaha, thank you that’s good to hear.” He pauses, “Luciel mentioned you were part of the RFA before, but I thought it was just a joke. So you really are the actor Zen? I’ve seen a few of the films you’ve starred in!”
“Oh! I’m surprised you’ve heard of me. You’re completely right, I am the handsome actor known as Zen, the actor given blessed with both beautiful looks and great talent.” Saeyoung tried his hardest not to snort at his bragging. While Zen is many things, humble is not one of them.
“Dramas and musicals right?”
“Yeah, I honestly love being an actor. I wouldn’t give it up for anything in the world, and there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for acting.
“Even if I have to act out raunchy scripts, like ‘Promiscuous Jalapeno Topping’?”
Zen laughs, “It wasn’t that raunchy compared to other things I’ve been in, it just had a little fanservice in it.”
“Oh? Are you implying you’ve done worse?” Saeyoung teases.
“Hey! I may be open to lots of roles, but that’s an entirely different profession!”
Saeyoung bursts into laughter, but to his surprise, Zen’s face quickly changes into something Saeyoung can only describe as flirtatious.
“But, if you wanted me to, I wouldn’t mind putting on a special show for you~”
This stops his laughter dead in his tracks. Did Zen really just say that? Saeyoung can feel his cheeks heating up, he normally doesn’t deal with this type of attention. How do you even respond to something like this?
“H-hey! PG-13! Please to god keep this PG-13! We haven’t even met yet, for all I know, you could be an impersonator planning to kidnap a cute girl like me.”
Smooth Mary. he scolds himself. He can’t just let a few flirtatious words get him all knotted up. Maybe being a shut-in was starting to take it’s toll on him. If a few words got so easily under his skin, this really wouldn’t end well. After this whole ‘Mary’ joke runs it’s course, he really doesn’t want to answer to Zen’s questions as to why he was getting genuinely embarrassed.
“Ahaha, I’m only joking so please don’t get so flustered, although don’t get me wrong, you’re really cute with your face flushed like that.” Zen winks, “I promise I won’t try and kidnap you, so why don’t we meet up tomorrow?” Another warm smile from Zen.
“Oh, sure.” Saeyoung responds automatically, immediately regretting it, “How about the Eldrich Park fountain at two tomorrow?” He says, damning himself further.
“Sounds good!” Zen sounds so eager Saeyoung actually feels guilty for tricking him, “Since it’s getting late, I think we should hold this conversation for tomorrow. Good night Mary.” Zen kisses the phone before hanging up, surprising no one.
Oh my god. Who even kisses their phone during a video chat? Saeyoung would laugh if he didn’t feel so jittery. Honestly, he didn’t expect Zen to fall for it. He thought Zen would recognize him on sight and then he would proceed to laugh at Zen in a “Gotcha!” moment.
Instead, Saeyoung got a date with a flirtatious, almost certainly heterosexual Zen. He will fix this though, tomorrow morning he’ll let Zen know Mary is nonexistent. Right now though, he just wants to sleep and not think about it. This prank had barely started, and already it felt like it was escalating far beyond his control.