Exhausting
Those stories that hit a bit too close to home when you worry about being too much for the people you love and need the reminder that you are enough.
(Open, Unmoderated)
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Summary
Buck makes his way down the hallway silently – forcing himself not to poke his head into Christopher’s room one last time – and locks the door as he leaves. The sound of the deadbolt turning brings tears to his eyes. It just feels so final.
It isn’t until he reaches the loft that he realizes the shirt he grabbed from the floor is Eddie’s. It smells like laundry detergent and cologne and smoke and something that’s unique to Eddie – a scent that Buck could recognize blind, could find his way to in a burning building.
He leans against the door and cries, allows himself to mourn for Eddie and his team and his childhood and every other thing he’s fucked up because Evan Buckley is a great deal of things, but most of all he is a failure.
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Or:
Forgiveness is not something that Evan Buckley is worthy of.
Series
- Part 3 of blue writes 911
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Is happiness on the highway, or is it parked in a driveway? by Buddiesmutslut
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
05 Nov 2023
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Summary
Following the grocery store confrontation, Buck can't find a good reason to keep fighting to come back to people who don't want him. He drafts up his resignation, only to be stopped by a phone call from Chris' school, telling him that Christropher was transported to the hospital, and they can't get ahold of Eddie.
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Summary
a post lawsuit fix it, except there's a lot more hurt, because buck's trauma regarding his parents isn't talked about enough. christopher diaz to the rescue.
TW in the notes
Series
- Part 1 of bucks healing journey
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Summary
Exhausting. The word haunts Buck like an omen, reminding him that he’s just too much. He never thought he would hear it from Eddie, though. Not again. Not when he thought things were going in the right direction, when he’s been getting more sure with each smile Eddie threw him, each lingering touch, when he’s been gathering courage to take the next step. Exhausting and delusional - what a combination.