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I choked on a vegetable and died. Apparently my death was ridiculous enough for me to slip through the reincarnation cycle with my memories intact. If I was going to die a completely stupid death anyway, might as well risk it in a career as a hired assassin right?
Or in other words, a poor reincarnated soul finds out her hair is as green as the vegetable she choked on, the universe is laughing at her misfortune, and she's on track to being a full-time killer... but hey on the bright side she might just be a sociopath so this probably is the career for her!
Series
- Part 1 of Snap Back To Reality
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 271,936
- Chapters:
- 53/53
- Collections:
- 16
- Comments:
- 801
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- 2,195
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- 637
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Bookmarked by Bungarose
20 Jan 2026
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Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? (you should be) by Snoweylily
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
26 Feb 2026
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“No post on Sundays” Uncle Vernon announced happily, “No damn letters today-”
Something came whizzing down the kitchen chimney as he spoke and caught him sharply on the back of the head. The next moment, thirty or forty letters came pelting out of the fireplace like bullets.
“That does it!” he snapped, his beady little eyes focused solely on Harry, “It’s you that they want. And they won’t stop coming after us until you’re… gone”.
Harry didn't like the sound of that.
“But Vernon, we can’t! You heard what that- that despicable old man told us!”
“Don’t worry, pet” Vernon said, his nasty grin triumphant, “I’ll leave him someplace so far away that those freaks will never trace him back to us. There’s an institute up north, for these- these hopeless cases and whatnot - St Brutus's Secure Centre for Boys. I’ll leave him there, and then we can get back to our nice, normal life”.Or, the one where Harry doesn't attend Hogwarts in first year but finds his way to the wizarding world anyway, and this changes everything.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 719,425
- Chapters:
- 118/?
- Collections:
- 44
- Comments:
- 12,108
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- 21,271
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Bookmarked by Bungarose
20 Oct 2025
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"The truth, it is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution." -- Albus Dumbledore to Harry Potter
When he first visits Gringotts, Harry is given a letter left for him by his mother before her death. The contents will challenge his sense of self and teach him the value of Secrets.This is a Work In Progress. It is not finished. It may never be finished. Read at your own risk.
Series
- Part 20 of W.I.P. Collection
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 244,654
- Chapters:
- 40/?
- Collections:
- 26
- Comments:
- 3,976
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- 9,097
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- 3,587
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- 343,715
Bookmarked by Bungarose
12 Oct 2025
