Creaker



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    When a newly resurrected Ministry marriage mandate announces that Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy are a perfect magical match according to an ancient spell (dusted off by morons), Hermione does the sensible thing: she assumes the spell is wrong and prepares to tear the Ministry apart at the seams.

    Unfortunately, the spell is magically and legally binding.

    Now Hermione—cursebreaker extraordinaire, workaholic, and part-time harbinger of bureaucratic doom—is forced to cohabitate with the one wizard she absolutely refuses to find attractive while she prepares to annihilate the Ministry in court, in public opinion, and possibly in small controlled fires. All the while, Draco Malfoy goes from mildly intrigued to catastrophically besotted in record time.

    As Hermione plots the downfall of the Ministry's heinous legislation and Draco tries (and fails) not to make heart eyes at his new wife, they discover that the spell might know something they don’t.

    A comedy of errors, enemies-to-lovers chaos, magical academia shenanigans, and sexual tension so thick it could be classified as a solid.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,748
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    118
    Kudos:
    280
    Bookmarks:
    123
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    01 Feb 2026