NotS0Cool



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    "I double checked it myself; the science is sound," Val said. "This product really does attract male spiders.”

    Johnny’s mind had gone curiously blank.

    “Male spiders,” he said. “Huh.”

    “I wonder if I could weaponize it,” Valeria said, tilting the tablet.

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    27 Jan 2026

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    “Does this new man even like you?” Darren said. “Or is this just the latest in a long line of cries for attention? I’d have thought Johnny Storm, back from the dead, would’ve kept you going for a few more months.”

    “What?” Johnny said.

    “I mean,” Darren said, shrugging with that kind of deceptive casualness Johnny recognized so well but had never been able to replicate. “This new boyfriend rumor’s everywhere, you’ve been snapped a couple times, but he’s never around you, he hasn’t met any of your friends. No one’s seen hide nor hair of him, and now this? He can’t even be bothered to make it to your birthday party?”

    --

    Months after his return from the Negative Zone, a surprise party awakens a host of old insecurities in Johnny.

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    22 Jan 2026

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    “A field trip?” Peter said.

    “Just a little family outing,” Sue said, passing him a knife. He took it and obediently started helping her cut the crusts off a small mountain of sandwiches. “We thought you might like to join us.”

    “I mean, it sounds great,” Peter said. “But work is a little swamped and somehow whenever I take off with you guys I always manage to go missing for two months. My landlady does not love it.”

    “We really could use the extra set of hands. Also,” Sue said, “someone needs to keep an eye on Johnny.”

    Peter groaned.

    --

    Peter's spider-sense starts acting up on a Future Foundation field trip. He and Johnny, recently returned from the Negative Zone, have to pretend to be married. These two things are related.

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    21 Jan 2026

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    Okay, so here's the lowdown: he's naked, he doesn't know his own name, there's a Spider-man suit in the hotel room bathtub and his equally naked buddy can set himself on fire. Yelp.

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    20 Jan 2026

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    “Wait,” Peter said, peering over Johnny’s shoulder, solid warmth at his back. “Why is there food in my fridge?”

    Johnny elbowed him back. “You just had web fluid and old cheese in it. My sister and I went shopping. Sit down already.”

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    20 Jan 2026