Rlc435
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Your name is Karkat Vantas and you suppose a quiet drive to New York was too much to ask for. Instead you're spending the whole trip with the world's most obtuse man, all because you had the audacity to tell your friends what your post semester plans were. Fuck you for having basic human decency.
(When Harry Met Sally AU that's loosely fit to the plot of the movie.)
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Her mind reeled as the world stayed pitch black around her, she had twenty minutes until she had to be on stage to film the finale, dozens of people were counting on her and she couldn't do it. She sat there, on the verge of tears, certain her career was over, when a voice cut through her thoughts.
Hello?
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A Sam/Evan Malevolent AU.
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“So, Robert, I hear you went out on a date.”
Robert chuckled into his receiver, at Invisigal’s opening for today’s bout of requisite Z-Team inane-ass smalltalk.
“I don’t know about any of you guys, but I am getting a very weird sense of déjà vu. Do we think Shroud is waiting somewhere round a corner, to try and kidnap Beef again?”
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(AKA: once Robert Robertson's Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs is met, he finds himself starting to wonder if... maybe, just maybe, he might be little bisexual).
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- Part 1 of fuck it! dispatch fic collection
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"I like you." Robert's words come out in a quiet exhale, but unwavering, unabashed in the quiet night air. "Might be in love with you, just a little."
Flambae swallows, throat tight, a coil in his stomach. "I-I...Robert." He places a hand on the railing beside Robert, the man still looking at him with shiny doe brown eyes. He taps the remaining fingers of his right hand against the cool metal nervously. "I...I'm sorry."
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After the "We Can Just Be Friends" Ending, SDN decides Mecha Man should do a press conference to answer some of the public's burning questions regarding his involvement in stopping Shroud and the Red Ring. Of course, Charles Kingsley is there and needs answers to the questions no one asked... because the questions are wildly out of pocket.
Robert understandably snaps.
Somehow being rage-baited to come out as bi on live TV is the least embarrassing part.
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“Where the fuck is Flambae?” Robert said in way of team greeting.
“He’s off again.” Prism said. “Personal reasons.”
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Flambae is going through something, and no one knows what exactly. So when Robert finds him on the steps leading up to the SDN Torrance branch office after hours, he decides to see if he can help Z Team's resident mouthy fireball.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,041
- Chapters:
- 5/?
- Comments:
- 188
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- 1,510
- Bookmarks:
- 277
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Bookmarked by Rlc435
09 Feb 2026
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“She didn’t tell me she was sending the hot nurse.” His voice is low, raspy in a way Robert is sure is supposed to be seductive but sounds a little more like he swallowed sandpaper. He grins up crookedly, eyes shamelessly dragging over the column of Robert’s throat. “Not that I’m complaining.”
Robert blinks. Once. Twice.
He… he wasn’t expecting that.
Or,
Flambae is concussed and thinks Robert’s his boyfriend. Shenanigans ensue.