1 - 20 of 408 Bookmarks by Somewhat_timeless
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It begins, as all things do, with her right hand shoved up a well-greased turkey’s butt.
“Talk fast Humphrey, because in case you haven’t noticed, this delicate hand here — ” Blair hisses, wiggling said hand that was currently plunged wrist-deep in the poor fowl’s carcass, “ — was not designed for prolonged contact with raw poultry!”
“Oh, shoot, wait,” mutters Dan, eyes darting towards his laptop screen. “Martha Stewart says we’re supposed to rub a sprinkle of salt and pepper, y’know, inside the cavity before we fill it up — ”
Blair’s eyes widen in horror. “And you couldn’t tell me this before I grabbed a handful of stuffing and shoved it straight up a turkey’s ass??”
(or: Dair, Christmas holiday shenanigans, and perhaps the blossoming of something new…? 🩷)
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
14 Dec 2025
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He’ll get over it eventually. He comes close, in between one moment and the next, or he at least convinces himself he does. But then he looks back in his notes about the Forum and spots a pair of Chanel flats on someone’s feet in the streets and he’s right back where he started, thinking it might take him longer to get over it than it ever did to build the city he’s currently in.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
04 Aug 2025
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Blair Waldorf is supposed to be getting married. She’s supposed to be in Monaco, soaking up the sun with her prince, the one she’d fought tooth and nail to keep. Dan Humphrey is supposed to be in the Hamptons, forgetting all about their misbegotten kiss and the feelings that arose with it.
Neither are where they are supposed to be.
//
Season 4 finale/season 5 au: blair didn’t sleep with chuck at the bar mitzvah, she went to Monaco with Louis without making up with Chuck after the events of the end of 4x20Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
20 Jul 2025
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your touch brought forth an incandescent glow by automatiques
Fandoms: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
28 Jul 2025
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London 1816. It's Lady Sansa Stark's third season and she's determined to find a husband this year and finally escape Lord Baelish's unwanted attentions. However, she meets Captain Theon Greyjoy, an unrepented rake who gives her some respite from the ton and Lord Baelish. Her friends tell him she needs a husband, not a lover. Her friends warn her not to fall for his charms. Do any of them heed their advice?
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
14 Jul 2025
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another mistake (all i could make in my immature state) by blerenaskiss
Fandoms: Gossip Girl (TV 2007)
13 Jul 2025
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Blair watches The French Connection
or
Blair remembers being in love
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
13 Jul 2025
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Growing up and making out and being awesome instead: one year at Yale.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
13 Jun 2025
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they use his credit card to get some supplies at one of the airport stores.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
11 Jun 2025
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"You know the best love stories, Waldorf, they’re actually pretty simple. There’s no games, no scheming, no humiliation. No car crashes or fake marriages. Just a guy and a girl. Maybe getting coffee, or watching a movie together, or reading books."
After the events of 'G.G.', Blair begins to figure out how to be happy again.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
11 Jun 2025
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Dan thinks Blair has betrayed him and leaves NYC with Serena. Blair chases after him, starting a cascade of events that will change the two of them forever.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
04 Jun 2025
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s/p 5x14, what if Blair had gone to the Dominican Republic after all, I just can't imagine she wouldn't have dragged Dan with her.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
04 Jun 2025
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Fifteen years post S5 finale. Blair has been living in Paris, managing Waldorf Designs. She returns to New York for a wedding and everything changes.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
01 Jun 2025
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Dan leaves. Blair gets everything she thought she wanted. And they don't ever think about one another.
The rational part of him — the part that recognizes Chuck and Blair rely on one another in a way that escapes him, and the part that never could quite believe Blair Waldorf was his girlfriend — that part doesn’t believe for a second she’ll show up to the airport. He’s ashamed to admit there’s another piece of him, small as it may be, that has taken the shape of a hope balloon and refuses to deflate. Dan is fairly certain it’s the same part to blame for kissing Blair the first time, or writing about her the first time, or thinking that telling her he loved her was ever a good idea.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
17 May 2025
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“To think, we were once just two strangers in Las Vegas.”
Blair Waldorf’s annual sleepover has been the event of the year ever since the ninth grade. Ten years later, the activities have progressed from low-key spa nights in Blair’s penthouse to a sin-filled weekend in Las Vegas.
But the most intriguing part of the annual sleepover is always the obligatory round of Truth or Dare. Blair always comes out of each match victorious, but this year Serena levels her with a dare that might not be quite so achievable…
Unless Blair wants to return to NYC with a ring on her finger and a stranger for a husband.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
16 May 2025
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Blair Waldorf has been a bridesmaid too many times, 27 too many times to be exact. But she just can’t say no to taking center stage on such a special day, donning a fancy dress, and drinking too much champagne after making her toast. Dan Humphrey, on the other hand, hates the whole affair. The overly extravagant decor, the expensive flower arrangements, the frenzy over table settings, it’s all so exasperating. Yet, he can’t bring himself to quit his job as a wedding columnist. Especially, not once he’s met the perennial bridesmaid, Blair Waldorf.
A 27 Dresses AU.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
16 May 2025
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On Dan’s thirtieth birthday, he gets drunk with his friends and does the unthinkable. He wakes up twelve hours later with a horrible hangover ringing in a new decade and an outgoing call on his phone that lasted for twenty-three minutes and sixteen seconds to Blair Waldorf. There’s no question which is worse.
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
12 May 2025
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"You think I don't want to marry you? Blair, I think I'd have married you back when we were at W and you ran off with the stapler."
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
12 May 2025
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He was a fool for going up against her.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,900
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 100
- Kudos:
- 1,051
- Bookmarks:
- 196
- Hits:
- 16,145
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
12 May 2025
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She wishes Dan Humphrey had never taken a seat across from her their first week here. She wishes she didn’t have to contemplate the way she feels about him at all.
[or, Yale AU].
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 32,229
- Chapters:
- 8/8
- Comments:
- 209
- Kudos:
- 1,671
- Bookmarks:
- 410
- Hits:
- 39,255
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
07 May 2025
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B. WALDORF, the card says, embossed in silver print, and Dan commits that to memory. He’ll probably never see her again, but even so, B. WALDORF etches a space in his brain ten times larger than any five-foot-two socialite should be able to.
He’s surprisingly okay with that.
(or,
Dan is a bartender and Blair is the obnoxiously rich customer who keeps coming in to see him and it's casual, okay, it definitely doesn't mean she's in love.)
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
03 May 2025
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rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky (he feels like home) by mysteriesofloves
Fandoms: Gossip Girl (TV 2007)
15 Dec 2020
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It’s been years, since something like this. Truthfully, there has never been anything like this.
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,767
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 24
- Kudos:
- 361
- Bookmarks:
- 40
- Hits:
- 4,954
Bookmarked by Somewhat_timeless
01 May 2025